'I guess I was wrong.'

The words had come out harshly, but without bite. A simple statement of fact, a reprieve from the litany he had inside his own head. Arthur had turned away, not meeting Merlin's eyes. Merlin had begun to shed the tears Arthur was too afraid to acknowledge.

This wasn't another fight. This wasn't another battle with a neighbouring kingdom over a small square of grass. This was the end. He could hear it in the sound of sharpened metal, sending shivers over his bones, like an army on his grave. He could feel it in the eyes of his men, hard set and unmoving as they stood, torches in hand and hearts in mouths. He tasted it in the rusty fear in his mouth, in the salty tears from Guinevere's cheeks. He smelt it in the sweat surrounding him, and he saw it in the ground before him, that would be doused in the blood of worthy knights and unwilling soldiers before dawn.

Camlaan.

'Tonight, we do battle.'

Arthur.

'Tonight, we end this war.'

I'm sorry I had to leave you.

'We end a war as old as the earth itself.'

I didn't want to.

'A war against tyranny, and greed, and spite.'

I hope someday you will understand why.

'Not all will greet the dawn.'

Your plan is a good one, and you may yet save the kingdom

'Some will live,'

But you must beware.

'Some will die.'

Find the path, Arthur.

You think I didn't know? Arthur wants to shout. You think I didn't put the pieces together?

'But each and every one of you fights with honour,'

You think I never found out about the prophecy? You think I never read about my fate?

'And fights with pride.'

Who else could it have been, Merlin? Gaius could not have been with me over the deserts that we braved through, nor was he there when one of us was to be poisoned.

'For not only do we fight for our lives,'

Emrys. Destine to protect me until the day I die, at Mordred's hand. I thought that bringing him in, showing kindness and respect for him would bring him back, keep him safe from Morgana. I over trusted his loyalty. And now, here I am.

'We fight for the future.'

When you told me to deny the Priestesses their right to magic in Camelot, I doubted you. I doubted myself, and the label I had put you under. I saw you around Mordred-reserved, wary; yet you cared. I could see it in the fight in your eyes as you told me there was no place for magic in Camelot. It wasn't until I returned to find Mordred alive and well that I realised the prophecy was correct-he was my end.

'The future of Camelot,'

You may be a sorcerer, Merlin, but that is not who you are. You are the bravest, kindest, most loyal man I have ever met. You are not my servant; you are my best friend, and you have been that for years now. You are the reason I am still alive, the reason Camelot still stands, and the reason all my knights, citizens and kingdom are still here.

'The future of Albian,'

I hope someday you'll understand.

I have understood for years now. I have understood your passion, your protectiveness, your unexplainable absences. But I have been unwilling to say it, to acknowledge it. For while I understand it, I could not have you safe, while having to punish every other magic holder who comes our way. And I could not be the one to order your death.

'The future of the United Kingdoms.'

You are my best friend, my other half. I am alive because of you, and I shall die with the curse of my father's prejudice and pain. And while you are not hearing this, I hope you can understand, someday, that the pain I feel for what I have done to so many of your kind cripples me, for I have never wanted to hurt you. I have never regretted having you by my side.

'And for the love-

Please, Merlin.

-of Camelot.'

I don't want to die alone.