Alright! I know this is a couple days late, but I had the idea ON New Year's Eve, and didn't have the time to write it until tonight. It's kinda strange, and another one of my 'first person experiments' but we'll see!
The annual Team Rocket New Year's bash was officially underway. The whole syndicate paused for a night to get together and discuss plans for the year. Afterwards, as always, a huge party capped the night. Giovanni, who took the opportunity to display a rare show of compassion for his employees, had rented out the nicest hotel in Viridian so massive amounts of Rockets with tongues loose from alcohol wouldn't be hitting the street shortly after midnight. It seemed trivial, but it was also strategic. As guests began to shuffle in after strategic meetings and a quick change, the aged ballroom came alive with the chatter of many Rockets. In the darkest corner of the room, a younger woman with her hair in a loose bun and sporting an emerald dress sipped her scotch quietly. She had been attending these little 'parties' since she was too young to remember, and today would not be any different than previous years.
---
'I'm too young to be drinking this much,' I casually tell myself as I take another sip of the gin. It still burns on the way down, so I must not have had enough yet. The meetings tonight were more hellacious that in previous years, and all I wanted to do was get this evening over with. I have been attending these stupid parties ever since they've had them. Admittedly, I was clinging to my mother's dress for the first few, eagerly asking when we could go home and I could play with my Christmas toys that hadn't grown old yet. After Mother died I still was present at the parties, but Giovanni allowed me to earn some money serving dishes. Those were actually the years I enjoyed the party most. The anonymity and innocence of being a simple waitress was actually ideal to me. Once I became an agent, however, the whole thing got worse. Pushing the thoughts away, I downed the remainder of the liquid and debated getting another.
"Eighteen and already an alcoholic," Cassidy murmured while walking past my table. I know damn well she didn't have a reason to be on this side of the room. She even dragged that good-for-nothing Butch with her.
"Alcoholism has treatments. Ugliness doesn't," I call to her as she continues to walk away. I know it's juvenile, but she brings it out in me. Making up my mind, I head toward the bar for another drink.
"Not having a good night, Miss Jessie?" Mondo asks innocently while pouring me another.
"Not in the least, Mondo," I reply with a sigh. "I just need tonight to be over. Giovanni expects us to be here, but he can't control whether we enjoy it or not." Flashing him a winning smile I knew he adored, I quickly made a return to my darkened table. I don't know why I am so resentful right now. I am more successful now than I have ever been before, but it all seems so fake, so forced. Trying not to think, I take another gulp of the amber liquid and enjoy that I don't have to worry about the characteristic burn any longer. I actually really hate the stuff, but have found myself turning to it more and more over the past few months. James disapproves, but he has always been a goody-two-shoes. Speaking of the devil, here comes the prince of prude right now. His goofy grin is cute, but it grates on me when I'm in a dark mood.
"Hey Jess," James says nervously while scratching the back of his head. He really does look cute when he does that, especially with that tux. Shit, the alcohol is already talking. Now if I can just keep it from spewing out of my mouth.
"Glad to see you made it, prettyboy." Damn. I didn't mean to sound like a bitch either. I really should lay off of this stuff. Crimson creeps up James' face and I laugh. That boy needs to get bent, seriously. Luckily I can keep that comment out of my vomit of things I don't meant to say. I can see him eyeing the half emptied glass in my hand and I down the rest before he can say anything. Great, he's going to make a comment. I'll cut him off, "Yes, I have been drinking, James. And for starters, you are NOT my mother." The mention of her always brings me down and I must bite my lip to keep tears from forming. Before I realize it, I have bitten right through the back of my lip. James notices my shock as I put my napkin to my mouth in a meager attempt to stop the bleeding and shoves his way into the booth with me. "Getha hell away," I mumble through slurred speech and the increasingly dyed red napkin.
"Jess, you've got to get out of here, before you claw Cassidy's eyes out or something," he instructs while leaning over me to help me nurse my swelling lip. I wonder what cologne he is wearing, it really does smell good. I wonder if he always wears it, we're always working so hard all I ever smell on him is a musky sweat smell. Not that I smell him. Shit, I do. How lame is that? Anyway, I need to get this prick to leave me alone. I was here having a damn fine time until he interrupted. Looking up, I realize he's gone. Ha, guess I made that job easy. Although I notice him talking to Mondo at the bar, obviously angry at our assistant. Oh I hope Mondo doesn't tell James how much I've really had to drink. Getting up to make my escape, my pump catches on the edge of the booth and I hit the ground hard. Carefully (or as I like to think, but I can see my hand shaking like a leaf) I pick my clutch back up and slowly try to raise to my feet. This is going to take more effort than I thought.
"Look, Butch! Jess is one step above a common drunk. I knew this would finally happen," I can hear Cassidy exclaim to her partner. How the hell did she get back on this side of the room? I'm too ashamed to meet her eyes, but I can recognize the bottom of her dress and lunge for her. I'm able to knock her down, but she leaves my grasp. I can take this good-for-nothing tramp. "You little whore!" Cassidy exclaims while kicking a pointed heel in my direction. I manage to avoid the shoe and claw at her leg.
"It's you who is the whore! Have you managed to fuck Butch today yet. Or is it some other boy's turn? Or maybe…" before I know what is happening, I can feel someone pulling me back. Knowing the person behind me is stronger, I settle for spitting at the girl on the floor. I can walk on my own, I really wish people would leave me alone. I really wish that…..
---
I was glad when Jess finally passed out. She's a lovely partner but doesn't know how to deal with anything other than with alcohol. Mondo had already promised to cover us for our absence (if anyone even misses us) but now I have to get a passed out Jessie out of the ballroom and to the elevator. Mondo, who could see the whole scene and most likely could read the exasperation on my face, winks at me. That boy can always come up with a plan. When pouring a drink for the ever prissy Domino, he spilled the bourbon in a way that it marked her white dress. Watching the scene in front of me, I halfway fear for the poor boy's life, but I take advantage of everyone paying attention to Domino's screams and carry Jessie toward the elevators. I'm sure a few Rockets see as I try to run by, but I just hope all that do show compassion and don't rat us out. Cassidy, who was still griping at Butch for not helping her, knows I have dirt on her that can get her kicked out of the team, so I know she won't spill any stories.
Once entering the elevator, I set Jessie down the best I can before even pressing the button for floor six. I'm not the buffest of guys, and it was sheer adrenaline that allowed me to make it this far. Luckily, our room is across from the elevator- a fact I had despised earlier but was now happy with the situation. Jessie had never turned to means like alcohol when I knew her before, even in the bike gang where alcohol and drugs were readily available. It was confusing, but our friendship had changed. I wasn't sure that I could talk to her anymore. With the elevator lurching to a stop, I get my door key out before picking up Jessie. It's horribly awkward doing so, because I don't think there's a way I can do it without making it look bad. Luckily, no one is in the hallway to see me practically drag an unconscious woman into a hotel room and I shut the door quickly behind me. The slam of the door causes Jessie to stir and I know that she's not going to remain out of it for long.
---
I opened my eyes but immediately closed them due to the bright light. I must not be in the ballroom anymore. Slowly squinting, I can see out the details. Oh, I'm in the hotel room. The boss really did get us a nice room. Being as we had been a rather successful team for the boss as of late, we were able to enjoy one of the suites in the hotel. Hearing water pouring and cabinets shutting, I can open my eyes a little more and see James as he kneels beside me. Without words, I accept the ibuprofen and water offered to me and swallow the pills quietly.
"Think you can make it to the bed, Jessica?" James asks cautiously. I love it when he calls me Jessica. He always says it with a husky tone that makes me melt. I'll never tell him that, though.
"Sure, just help me up," I mumble through gritted teeth. I want to tell him I can do it on my own, but that would be rather foolish of me. The smell of his cologne once again enters my nostrils and I smile. Whatever this is, he must buy more! Losing my concentration of walking, I trip over my own feet. "Sorry," I whisper clumsily.
"Don't worry, we probably should have gotten your heels off of you before heading for the bedroom." I smiled at him. I had a deliciously wonderful idea and planned to execute it as soon as possible. First, I must keep my legs working to get to my bed. Reaching the bed successfully, I act like I'm trying to get the clasp undone on my shoe. I could have done it, a fact that surprised me, but instead I pretended to clumsily mess up. "James," I call to the man before me who had removed his tuxedo jacket and just began loosening his tie. I hadn't noticed that he had coordinated his tie and cummerbund to match my dress. That's cute. Waiting for him to sit down beside me, I stretch my leg onto his lap. "Please help me get my shoes off," I say in a cute innocent tone. The man before me obliged and although he struggled some with the straps, he eventually undid the intricate clasp and removed one shoe before working on the other. It's so strange to think of James as a man. I've known him since he was fourteen and still very much a boy. The James before me was very much a man, one I intended to know better. "You know, James, the night is still young." I attempt to say seductively. I must have failed because after throwing the second shoe on the floor with the first, he simple began to undo his cuff links and mumbled an agreement. This would not do. When Jessie wants something, Jessie gets something. Pretending to work on my dress buttons in back I whimpered again. "James, I can't get these buttons undone." I can't really tell, but I think his eyes flashed a little when I mention him helping me take off my dress. Turning around, so he could reach the back of my dress, a shiver goes down my spine as his soft hands began to undo the tiny intricate buttons. I wanted to feel more than just his hands and waited impatiently as he finally finished what must have been fifty different clasps. Before James could contradict or stop me, I turned around and lowered the top of my dress until it was settled around my waist. James was speechless, only opening and closing his mouth like a Magikarp on land.
---
"You're drunk, Jess," I managed to stammer. I know I shouldn't stare, but I can't stop. She's as beautiful as I had hoped. As perfect as I had dreamed. All of a sudden, I couldn't decide between jumping her then and there and locking myself in the bathroom. Instead I just sat there, and continued to stare at her perfect form.
---
I knew it was partially the alcohol talking, but I did like James so I didn't see a problem with what I was doing. Using my newfound adrenaline to stand (albeit somewhat unsteadily), I kicked off the bottom part of my dress, leaving me in nothing but a lace thong. James still hadn't collected himself past one statement, and I leaned in toward him. "So what if I am. It's not like I've just met you. You've been my best friend for as long as I can remember, so it's not like I'll wake up next to an unfamiliar face." Lightly placing a kiss on his forehead, I could feel the warmth of his skin, he was irresistible.
---
She leaned in to kiss me and I couldn't help but think that I dreamed for this moment so long. It was so perfect, she was so gorgeous. The alcohol though, dammit. I could smell the godawful stuff on her breath strong as anything. I have to say no. Scrambling back on the bed to escape her leaning over me, I make my stand. "You're drunk Jessie, you don't understand what your doing. Even if you do care for me, I'm willing to bet that you're not ready for this. It's the alcohol talking."
---
It's an excuse, it's all an excuse. "What James, am I not pretty enough for you?! Have you fucked some whores that were better than me? Was it Cassidy? You better not have screwed that bitch. You fucking man whore!" As anger took control, my balance faltered and I ended up lying in the floor. I partially knew what I was saying could never be true, but I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't even see him anymore, but I kept yelling. "Little orphan Jessie isn't good enough for some man whore like you! You only take the cultured whores, don't you?" Slowly, I lost control of even my frame of mind and could only cry. I knew I was being unreasonable, I knew it was the alcohol, but I couldn't help it. As James tried to help me back on the bed, I flailed wildly in an attempt to get away from him. I landed a fist somewhere with a dull thud, but I had no clue as to where. I lost the battle and ended up on the bed and the covers roughly thrown over me.
"Get some sleep, Jessie," James said harshly. He slammed the door on his way to the living room and I tried to fight the sleep, but it came too easily.
---
I slammed the door and cursed silently under my breath. I was surprised I had the restraint from slapping her, especially after she punched me in the eye. Reaching a timid hand toward my eye, I could tell it was already going to swell horribly. Just great. Hopefully some ice can at least minimize the swelling. I'm at a complete loss for words. That was the last thing I ever saw coming from my partner, and I really wasn't ready to deal with that. I'm definitely attracted to Jessie, but there are some things she needs to know about my past before I could get involved romantically with her. But I would have to explain so much.
It's easier to try to forget my past, so I decide to curl up on the couch with my ice pack and watch the New Years specials. Various singers grace the screen and belt out their latest hits, but I really don't care. The last thirty minutes replays in my mind vividly, and I don't know what to think about it all. I don't know that Jessie and I can ever be friends on the same level. It sucks that things can change so quickly in a friendship, especially when it's your only one. I guess there really is a fine line. Not caring to see the latest pop tart shake her half-clothed ass onstage, I flip off the television and lie on the couch, not caring about my rented tux getting absolutely wrinkled.
---
Shit. Shit shit shit! Is all that ran through my head. At first it was for my pounding headache. Then for what I did to James. Except I can't remember all of it. That is no good. I can remember coming onto him very strongly. And then I…oh no. I want to say I didn't, but I know I did. And that's all I remember. Trying desperately to remember anything after kicking off my dress, nothing comes. Ok. It's 11:45. So I've been asleep for what…around 4 hours? And if we did…then he would probably be here too, and I probably wouldn't have kept my underwear. Alright. So I didn't just have sex with my partner and best friend. I think. Well this is going to be a great story. After grabbing a robe from the bathroom door and slipping into it, I sneak a peak into the rest of the suite. James looks like he might be asleep on the sofa. I can avoid him for a little bit longer. Maybe my memory will come back so I don't look like a total idiot. Glad for once that James always travels with a huge medical supply kit, I pour two ibuprofen in my hand and swallow them dry. Unfortunately, I drop the bottle, which awakens the figure on the couch. Well this is it. I have to face him sometime, and it might as well be now. Trying to act as natural as possible in the situation, I stride over to the couch and begin to take the bobby pins out of my severely tangled hair. We sit in silence for a while with the only sound being my rustling to remove the offending pins. Finally James motions for me to sit on the floor.
---
"Go get your brush and I'll do that for you," I offer weakly. I really don't know what to do. I don't know what she does or doesn't remember, so I'm letting her bring up the topic. Probably not the best idea I've had lately. She returns quickly and obediently sits at my feet. Trying to be a gentle as possible, as I know Jessie has a tender head and really doesn't like others touching her hair, I pull out the pins one by one until all the metal pieces are gone. Softly brushing out the tangles in her hair, I can't help but break the silence, "I'm not mad at you, Jess."
---
I don't know what to say. I'm not even sure what happened. Slowly, I turn around and look at him, noticing his swollen eye. "Oh James," I whispered without thinking. He assured me again that he wasn't angry, but I could see him choking down words he wanted to say. I didn't mean to do this to my best friend. I'm not even sure what I did, but I regret it. I regret it all. "James," I start, moving back on the couch. "I'm so incredibly sorry. I'm not entirely sure what I did or didn't do to you, but I'm sorry. You're an amazing friend and I treated you horribly. I know I've probably ruined your trust, but I'm going to change. I'm done getting drunk like that. I needed a wakeup call, and treating you like this certainly is one."
---
I think she's sincere, but I can't deny the throbbing pain on my face or the embarrassment I feel from earlier. "I won't say I'm not hurt, Jess. This is going to take a while to get over, but if you really are done with this alcohol thing, that will be enough of an apology." We sit again in silence. Speaking without thinking, I blurt out, "I'm not going to say I wasn't tempted." Jessie's eyes look at me full of questions, and I know I have a duty to continue that thought I really didn't mean to say. "You are a beautiful girl, and I've wondered about a relationship with you before. I knew it was wrong, though. I didn't want to screw up our friendship like that. I care for you too much." I could see tears well in her eyes, I knew everything was going to be alright after all. Interrupting my thoughts, my watch on the table beeped to signal the hour. Not wanting to waste the moment, I ran to the fridge and poured a bottle I had been saving into the best glasses I could find and returned to the couch. "Happy New Years, Jessie," I say softly, before kissing her on the forehead. "Don't worry," I added with a smirk, "It's sparkling grape juice."
And there you go. I think it's kinda cute, if nothing else. Enjoy 2008 everybody!
Oovwee
