Hey guys! I decided to finally take this seriously and start updating. This is a one-shot where the Frozen gang reacts to their Honest Trailer.
*A crash is heard*
...I'll just clean that up. Enjoy!
Life was progressing as normal in the kingdom of Arendelle, when two sisters received a strange letter telling them to gather Olaf, Kristoff, Sven and the trolls in their castle for a surprise.
Curious, they did as the letter said.
Outside the palace…..
Aria is seen peeking through the window watching the group of people. Beside her was Lucas.
"Did you install the screen?" she asked.
"You bet."
She grinned. "Great! I can't wait to see their reaction."
Lucas gave her a questioning look. "Shouldn't we tell them what a screen is?"
"Hmmm…..NAH."
Back inside the palace…
The group was just chatting with one another when a giant screen appeared.
"What is this?" Anna asked.
"I think it's our surprise Anna" Elsa answered.
The screen switched on, showing a bunch of name appearing.
From the studio that finally learned how to make Pixar movies, and song writing duo behind HasaDigaEebowai, comes the feature length music video for Let It Go. Frozen.
Everyone was shocked
"HagaDiga what?"
"Music video?"
"Elsa look! It's…..us." Anna said slowly and excitedly.
It's been three years since the last Disney musical, and 18 years since the last good Disney musical.
"Who's that?" Anna spoke.
"And what is with her hair?" Kristoff piped up.
Now the big D is back and adjusted for inflation with two princesses,
"We rule" said Elsa and Anna, high fiving each other.
two goofy sidekicks,
"Yay us!" Olaf said, with Sven snorting in agreement
and three different orphans.
"Don't remind me" the three said, and then Elsa turned to look at Kristoff in shock.
"You're an orphan?!"
Welcome to Arendelle, a magical-lish, Scandinavian-nish country, that's been cursed with eternal winter,
Elsa looked down. Anna comforted her.
"Don't worry. It's not your fault."
even though their main export is ice.
There was silence, and then everyone chuckled, knowing it was true.
Meet Elsa, a manic-depressive princess with a confusing set of powers
"I am not a 'manic-depressive' princess".
like snow blasting,
"Hey Elsa, could you make it snow one time at our place? It's so boring that it's stuck in summer." One of the trolls said.
dress-making,
"Hey Elsa, you think you could make more clothes and sell them" Anna asked with a business-like gleam in her eye.
"I didn't know you have a taste for economics." Elsa said in surprise.
Anna smirked.
"Hans may be a manipulative evil douchebag, but he sure knew his stuff."
castle-building,
"What do you think we should do with your castle Elsa?" Olaf said. Yeah, people kinda forgot that he was there.
"Oh, I was thinking on making it a summer home." She replied. Everyone looked at her like she was crazy. After all, how do you turn an ice castle into a summer home, in middle of a snowy mountain?
and creating life?
Outside the palace…
"What!" Aria shouted. "She can bring stuff to life?"
"Did you not watch the movie?" Lucas deadpanned.
"Umm…I think I slept through that explanation part." She replied sheepishly
Lucas just sighed.
Back inside…
They kind of gross over that one.
Fall in love with her adorkable sister, Anna, who spends 3 years of her adult life shut inside a castle, even though she could leave it any time.
Anna looked confused.
"Huh, I could?"
"Well…." Elsa started, "Technically, I isolated myself in my room even before our parents died. You had free reign throughout the castle, so yeah, you could have left this place at any time."
"Oh"
And who could forget the completely unnecessary, unexplained magical troll rocks!
The trolls were, quite frankly, pissed off.
"Unnecessary eh? Unexplained eh? Let's show this guy who the hell we are!" shouted Grand Pabbie. The other trolls roared in agreement.
Elsa, Anna and Kristoff paled as they could practically see the angry mob forming in front of them, complete with pitchforks and torches. As a matter o fact, the trolls were holding pitchforks and torches.
"Now now trolls, you can find the man who insulted you all after the video, just don't tear up Arendelle doing so?" Kristoff pleaded trying to calm his family down.
When disaster strikes, watch Anna save the day by teaming up with — her sister, a merchant, a hot guy, and a snowman to defeat villains like — her sister, a merchant, a hot guy and a snowman.
Everyone blinked.
"I did not see that coming" Olaf remarked
Experience a clever twist on past Disney films; that teaches girls everywhere, they don't need a prince to rescue them because all men are disgusting loners, greedy murderers, or lying, manipulative power-hungry sociopaths!
"Hey!" Kristoff, Olaf and the male trolls protested. Sven just snorted.
Happy now, Jezebel?
"Who?"
So gather the family and sing along on a musical journey; that's all about the sound track! Featuring unforgettable songs like… the exposition song!
"Sorry about that" Elsa said.
"No worries sis"
The song that sounds like it's from Wicked!
"What's Disney and Lion King?" everyone asked themselves
The romantic duet.
Anna snarled
"There is no f #!ing way I am EVER doing that with that two-faced bastard!"
Everyone stared at her in shock.
The other romantic duet.
"That's not funny Sven!" Kristoff shouted at the reindeer, who was laughing.
The anthropomorphic sidekick's comic relief song
"Go me!" Olaf shouted joyfully, blissfully unaware of the hidden barb.
The one you skipped.
The one you don't know the words to.
If the trolls weren't furious then, they were royally pissed now.
"Let's teach that mother-", Let's just say, the trolls said something that would make you lose your innocence completely.
And the yolo song.
"Now that's just cruel. People like the song." Lucas said outside the castle, shaking his head.
STARRING.
Forgotten Sarah Marshall
"Forgotten?" Anna said, her eye twitching.
Kristoff Waltz
"Who's that?"
Ugly Smurfs
The trolls were bringing in cannons now.
Hans Gruber
"I don't know who that is, but that is one lame name, perfect for that pain-in-the-neck". Guess who said that.
Merchandising
"What does that mean Elsa" Olaf asked.
And the wickedly talented Adele Dazeem
Elsa puffed up in pride at the complement.
FROZEN
You don't need true love to thaw a frozen heart, just soak it in water for a few hours. It works on turkeys.
Anna was rather annoyed with this comment. I mean, seriously, is he really comparing her to a bunch of birds.
The video ends and the screen disappear. The trolls immediately rush out of the castle to begin their search.
Elsa covered her face with her hands.
"We're not going to hear the end of this from the townsfolk, are we?" Anna and Kristoff only shook their heads.
Outside the castle, Lucas was busy chasing Aria with a golden hammer, intent on smashing her for creating a riot that would leave Arendelle in shambles.
Please read and review!
3/14/2015: Edited. I noticed that in the last parts of this fanfic, it said "Leo" instead of "Lucas". I've corrected it now.
5/7/2015: Censoring. No cussing here...unless an anvil drops on your foot, and you're repeatedly dipped in lava.
