Crack

This is a series I randomly came up with, both out of great boredom and great love for Kuroko no Basuke. Please excuse my shortcomings (such as grammar and misspells). I do this for pure entertainment (and to feed my own peculiar desires) so... ~Anyway, please have fun.

Disclaimer: I offered my soul to Akashi in exchange for him and Kuroko and he replied by throwing scissors at me and told me to "Never touch Tetsuya" . I guess I don't own them.

Kuroko is a BOY here, that is all.

The shuffling of shoes resonated in the open crowded grounds and the cheerful chatters expressed contained excitements through the past duration of spring break. The blossoming Sakura trees scattered its petals, adding color to the already lively image of Teiko High.

"Ah, please excuse me.." A boy with tantalizing blue locks and blue ocean eyes muttered under his breath as he picked up his fallen article of interest, dusting imaginary dirt off of it as he sighed for the second time.

The blond person who bumped into him didn't even bother to look back and was frantic. Wondering if he hit an imaginary wall or was being haunted by a wandering ghost, the thought visibly sent shivers to the boy and he proceeded to speed walk to the nearest group of people, yelling a noisy "Akashichiiii!" in the process.

"Again.."

Kuroko was well aware of his lack of presence but would occasionally forget his "special case". Sometimes he got tired of it, being forgotten during the daily roll call was one thing. Not to mention having to help himself in the counter because no one notices him, being pushed without knowledge and simply being forgotten is a real pain in the ass.

Some people would simply accept it as it is and try to make it to their advantage. He did it himself, cutting in line, pretending to have been present whenever he's late for meetings and leaving really awkward situations in the most unnoticed way possible, but all these privilege wouldn't make up for all the cookies he didn't got a taste of, having been forgotten during Cookie Day in is Nursery days.

Realizing that his soliloquy had taken up two paragraphs of this short story, he shrugged the thought of . He stared at the group of interesting people who happen to be associated with the idiot that came in contact with him. Kise, that's what he had overheard anyway, talked about what had transpired minutes ago to him, claiming that his beauty had caused confusion to the dwellers of the afterlife and thought he was an angel. Kise just earned an apathetic look from a titan with violet flowing hair.

"Kise-chin is an idiot."

"-But it's true!"

"Ryouta, you stop spouting nonsense or I triple your training menu."

"-Akashiiicchiiiiiii"

The said man just looked at Kuroko, to his surprise. He still had that amused expression he had awhile ago after hearing Kise's gibberish rants and deducted that the blond was an absolute bird-brain, but as Akashi looked at him, he returned to his usual expression and just stared back at him.

"Oi, where are you-" After following the said man's line of sight, the ganguro with midnight blue hair's voice got hitched in his throat. The girl was beautiful, although her hair was short and can be the cause for her to be mistaken for a dude, she had her dreamy blue eyes redeem her. Sure she might lack a little in the boob department, but he was prepared to absolutely overlook that. Soon enough, all of the members of that certain group were entranced by the "girl" Akashi was approaching, having varying thoughts.

"I'm gonna make her love me and me only. I'm gonna become the light to her shadow.."

"She's so cute, I wanna crush her then eat her. Then marinade her..."

"Not to mention Oha-Asa said I have the greatest luck today. I believe I've found my lucky item for today..."

"Ahhhhh! She's so cute, I'm gonna make sure to be the perfect copy of her ideal boyfriend..."

Akashi, despite his notably short stature , took long, powerful strides towards Kuroko. Kuroko, in his usually blunt demeanor just awaited for what was about to happen, somehow he felt a chill run down his spine as the red haired fellow nears him. He put his book in his bag to divert his attention for a little while and was surprised to see heterochromatic eyes stare down at him intensely after looking up.

"Ah...ahem.." After Kuroko faked a cough, those heterochomatic eyes widened for a bit, as if snapping out of a daze. Kuroko felt slightly relieved that he stopped the other from piercing through his soul and felt relaxed when the redheads's mouth tugged up in a charming smile.

"I apologize for that rude gesture, I was caught in a trance by those transfixing eyes of yours" his voice was apologetic, but there was a hint of something else. As if staring wasn't weird enough, the redhead grabbed his hands and kissed the top of it, earning a couple of protesting grunts from the other men.

"Is he...flirting with me?!"

Kuroko cleared his throat, clearly showing his discomfort. The redhead's authoritative air wasn't fazed and he kept Kuroko's hand in a tight grip. Seemingly unable to voice out his thought out of fear and surprise, he then listened to what the redhead had to say.

"I noticed awhile ago that my imbecile teammate-" he points an accusing finger at the blond"-has failed to notice your beautiful presence. I apologize for that matter and will make sure that he be punished accordingly." he radiated with the prince-like aura and gave a light bow to Kuroko.

"What the balls (pun unintended) is happening?!"

Finally mustering the courage, he slowly pulled his hand away. Realizing that he didn't know how to refer to the boy, he tried to reason with him.

"A-anno..Akashicchii-kun"

Then there was chaos. Clearly hearing the voice of a male escaping the the "beautiful princess" caused a ruckus within the group was mind boggling but hearing the name of their emperor was too much to take. Finally noticing that the apple of their eyes bared the same uniform as them (pants and all), Akashi froze on the spot, Kise fainted, Aomine withered away, Murasakibara dropped his chips and Midorima's glasses cracked.

Their final thoughts were then somehow heard by the world.

"Ah...I lost my appetite"

"Oha-Asa... Lied to me"

"I-I should stop reading those magazines..."

"I-I guess I should really stop reading those fanfics my fans give me..."

"H-how could this happen, I am absolute..."

!

The End