Yoda to seekum new clothum.

The scene is set, the fires lit, the mood is calm and all is well.The oh so powerful jedi-master is kicking it back with his cup of cocoa and mumbling nothings to himself.
"Mmmm old and rotten are my clothes,tattered and torn they appear to be"
The so very wise Yoda re-adjusts where he was sitting so as to not allow his garments to catch on fire.
"Mmmmm hot this fire is, warm I am"
Just then Frodo comes running in the door shouting "I'm a haemophiliac!","Daaaaaaaahhhh!"
He runs over to the fire and thrusts his hand into the fire, after many re-attempts after pullin back from constant burns he produces a small metal shiny object.All the time the great jedi master is sittin back eying this young weirdo two-legged freak that just burst through his door and so rudely and had spoilt his fire, by searching for some-THING which shouldn't have even been there.
"Mmmmm rude you are!" Yoda remarks at Frodo.
"What're you gunna do about it you old,small,green,incapable,little freak?"
"Mmmm VERY rude you are, I dont mind you calling me all those things but to do it while stealing from my fire is great evil" Yoda thought to himself 'the dark side is strong with this one'
"Oh yeah! Well what are you gunna do about it?, for i have the one ring to rule them all that i pulled from the fir.......!!!!!,WHAT THE!?"
The young egotistical upstart stopped dead in his tracks of dissing the oh so mighty jedi lord who had just performad an amazing feat.
"Mmmm into fire I have reached and shiny metal object I have also found"
Frodo replies,
"Hey, only im supposed to be the one who can do that!This is so not fair!"
Yoda looks at the object in his hand and slowly a smile spreads across his green face, and he looks up at Frodo who immediately and worriedly replys.
"What?!"
Yoda slowly looks down at the object he is holding and begins to speak to Frodo in a low tone.
"Mmmm ahh shiny little band you have in your hand,I must ask you a question does thee trust thee life within thee ring?"
"Ahh yeah of course its like the ultimate thing you can possibly be holding right now"
And again Yoda replies
"Mmmm think you are infallable you do!, deceived you are, more powerful my shiny metal object is.
At this point in time Frodo was starting to fill the floor up with sweat.The jedi lord continues;
"Mmmmm, watch this you must, for who is the more powerful will be shown to be".
At this point in time Yoda pressed a button on his tiny little metal object and a green light beam emanated from it.
"Mmmm lite-saber I have"

(Enter big fight scene , Matrix style between Yoda and Frodo, Yoda wins"

After the heat of battle had died down,the great jedi master had slain the small Frodo.
"Mmmmm dead you appear to be, check through your clothes and rummage I will"
So the Great jedi master was looking through Frodos clothes when a small piece of paper fell out.
"Mmmmm Clothing voucher this appears to be, go and use it I will"

(Outside Galactic clothing store, how did we get here you ask? Magick!!!)

"Mmmm big this place is, cater for the small well they do not."
Yoda walks inside and looks around for a while seeing plenty he likes but not much that'll fit him, so he tries the kids section and finds something real nice looking that fits.
"Mmmm get this I will,good it will look on me"
The great Jedi Master walked to the front of the store as if to leave,But jut then a strait long white haired freak stood in his way, Yoda looked up at him.
"Mmmmm Legolas you appear to be,gay you are also said to be"
"Yo,yo yoda what's up homes?, are you just kicking it around the hood?,Whoa!dude i have like a bow and arrow!whoa!,watch this"