Fandom: Fushigi Yuugi

Title: Comfort [version 1]

Pairing: unrequited Tasuki/Miaka

Disclaimer: FY belongs to Watase Yuu… and probably some other people, none of whom are me!

W00t! My first anime fanfic! Am I a real fangirl now?

Spoilers for episode 4 ("The Flame of Friendship") of the second OAV, during which episode this fic is set.

SPOILERY EXPLANATION THING:

After the incident at the inn, when Tasuki is grovelling apologetically to the others, he's wearing different clothes from when Mitsukake rescued him from the fire. So I think the grovelling and Miaka being caught in Hikou's spell must have happened the next morning, right? Anyway, this fic is set during the night before that.

Dedicated to Enigma O!

***

I'm in love with her.

I think I've always been in love with her – since before the time she nearly drowned, at least – but she'd never look twice at me even if she wasn't head over heels for Tamahome. I've been 'just a friend' for far too long for her to ever see me as anything more. I know that. But I can't help hoping that someday she'll change her mind.

I feel guilty, sometimes, for wanting to ruin what seems like such a perfect couple. For loving someone who belongs to someone else.

He says he knows how I feel.

***

"Tasuki-kun? Are you alright?"

Chichiri had been surprised to see someone else awake at this early hour of the morning – even more so when he saw who it was. It would normally take wild horses to drag the ex-bandit out of bed a minute earlier than necessary, and yet here he was, sitting under a tree, before the sun was even up… although perhaps it wasn't so unexpected, considering the events of the night before . Even more strangely, he didn't seem to have even registered the monk's presence, still staring off into the distance.

"Tasuki-kun no da?"

This time he got a reaction, at least – Tasuki started, giving a half-hearted grin when he saw who it was, and gestured for the monk to sit down beside him.

"What are you doing out here?"

"Just… thinking. About Miaka."

Chichiri just nodded, not wanting to provoke his hot-tempered friend. None of them blamed him for what he'd done under the influence of the spell, and Tasuki knew that, but it still wasn't something he could just forget about.

"… do you want to talk about it?"

She loves him, even though he makes her cry. Even though he hurts her.

It's not fair.

"At the inn, before we – before I… it was nice. We were just sitting together, and talking and it was just… nice, ya know? I wish we could do that again."

But she doesn't trust me anymore…

"She didn't mention Tamahome once while we were sitting there, either. And afterwards, when she woke up and said his name, it made me so angry that she was still thinking about him, when I love her so much more than he does!" He broke off, realising that he was crying.

"You really love her?" Tasuki nodded, and was surprised to feel the monk wrap his arms around him, pulling him into a hug. "It's hard when you can't be with the one you love na no da."

Even though I knew it was the spell making me do those things, even though I knew I should have resisted… I didn't want to stop. If she hadn't looked so terrified… if Tamahome hadn't turned up when he did…

"… yeah." Tasuki let himself return Chichiri's embrace, crying himself to sleep against his chest, and didn't think to question what a monk would know of broken hearts.

END