A/N: Hey guys! I'm back, and with something completely different! While this is Mallie, I would love it if some Calzona lovers read this too. You never know, your opinion could be changed ;) I'm working really hard on this when I can. I'm working 55+ hour weeks right now and I'll be honest that I have very little time, so don't expect immediate updates. But I promise to make every update a good one.
This will hopefully be shorter and juicer than Luxury. I'm feeling at the most 15 chapters, but we know how that changed with Luxury, so I won't hold my breath. I'm just going to tell the story :)
I hope you guys love it!
They worked at the same place, just down the street. They lived in the same building, just across the hall from each other. Their front doors were almost identical except for the gold apartment numbers nailed to them. But behind those doors, their lives had been completely different for over a year now. Mark had been wrapped up in Lexie and Teddy, while Callie had been clinging to Arizona like a security blanket. They had drifted apart. Not intentionally, just due to circumstances that they couldn't control. He knew that she was happy, and that was all that he wanted for her, to be happy. And loved. Arizona loved her. He saw it when he watched them together. They were happy and stable, and loving, and going to last a lifetime. Until four days ago.
Now, boxes of Callie's stuff were stacked around Mark's couch and television, in his kitchen, and in his bedroom. He sat the box in his hands down by the door and looked around. He'd never imagined they'd end up like this.
"Mark."
"Callie?" he'd asked into the phone, riddled with confusion. She should be on a plane to Africa right now.
"Can you come to the airport please?" he could hear her voice breaking.
"What happened?"
"Arizona left me."
Four days ago, he had been certain that he wouldn't see her for three years, if ever again. He had said goodbye to his best friend, and wished her well before she left to get on a plane that would take her halfway around the world, because that's where the woman she loved was going. That's how much Callie loved Arizona. And that's how much he loved Callie, enough to let her go. She wasn't his, not by a long shot. Now, she was crying more often than not. Her chocolate eyes were melted and bloodshot. Her golden heart was shattered into millions of unrecognizable pieces. He'd been there for her through George, through Erica, and through the roller coaster that was Arizona. But Callie had been kicked off the ride and Mark was there to lead her out of the theme park. She had never been his, and yet she always had been. He fought back a sigh as Callie came in behind him with the last box. "Thanks again, for doing this."
"No problem, Cal," he said, turning on his charm, not wanting her to know what his thoughts were. "You've got a lot of crap, you know?"
She snorted, looking around his now cluttered apartment. "Sorry. I think most of it is…Arizona's." Her voice caught in her throat. She didn't want to cry again. She really didn't want to cry again.
"You, uh, talked to the Chief about getting your job back?" Mark asked, changing the topic from the blonde as he took the last box from her hands and set it on top of another one nearby.
She walked over to his couch and sunk into it, kicking off her shoes and tucking her feet up underneath of her. "Yeah, he hasn't replaced me yet. So I'll be back in two weeks. He's just taking it from my vacation time."
Mark had gone to the kitchen and pulled down two coffee mugs. He still knew how she liked her coffee. He would never forget. It was one of those things about Callie. "That's good."
"Yeah," she sighed heavily and he could see the weight of the world pressing down on her shoulders. "It'll give me time to go through all this stuff and put her stuff back into storage. And to get my renters out of my apartment." She took his offered coffee and sipped, a grateful smile playing with her lips.
"Or you could just stay here," he let it slip out unintentionally.
"Mark," she fought laughter. "You're trying to pull things together with Lexie. I don't think my living here for long will help with that. She's already nervous with me."
Maybe because she has a reason to be. His mind thought before he could control it. "The invitation is open."
She nodded, and then dissolved into tears again. "Mark, what am I going to do?"
He set his coffee down beside hers on the coffee table and wrapped her into his arms. "Everything happens for a reason, Callie."
"I can't find a reason for this one, not this time," she cried into his neck.
"You may not know for a while," he said, stroking her back. "But one day, you'll look back and understand why she left you."
Callie was making dinner. She had insisted. She said that it helped get her mind off of things. So Mark had decided to jump in the shower. He had too much thinking to do and the hot water pounding on his back helped clear his head. Part of him was secretly happy. He got to keep his best friend. But she was devastated, and heart broken. He didn't want that for her. He hated seeing her like this, again. He wanted to see her happy.
With you, a voice in the back of his head whispered. It had been whispering to him a lot recently.
He shook it off. It was an idea that he'd entertained once upon a time. He could see a life with Callie, he wouldn't deny it. But she had never shown the same interest. After her divorce with George, there had been many a time where he'd considered asking her for a more committed relationship. But then Erica had come around and he'd been friend zoned. It was an idea that he'd abandoned after that. She was his best friend and he wouldn't risk that. Plus, she'd had the opportunity to come to him. They would always be friends, nothing more.
But still, he couldn't help but adore her. He put her on a pedestal where she could do no wrong. He adored everything about her, from the way she drank her coffee to how her face relaxed when she was sleeping to the way she smiled to her concentration when she was in surgery. He knew her favorite thing to do was read, but she was so busy that she never finished a book. She worked too much to ever possibly finish. She would read and then forget what had happened by the time she got back to it and would give up. It always amused him to ask her about her current book at work. She would huff and roll her eyes, frustrated with herself. And she loved his chocolate chip pancakes.
"I'll make them for her tomorrow," he promised the shampoo bottle. Letting the water pound the rest of the thoughts out of his head, he quickly rinsed off and snuck into his bedroom to change. When he came back out, he watched her for a few moments. She was bent over the stove, crying. She was always crying.
"Dinner was great, Cal," he smiled. Callie was a genius in the kitchen. When Mark thought he didn't have anything to eat, Callie always managed to whip up some delicious meal. And then she would leave him to eat it alone and go back to Arizona, but that was beside the point. Except for tonight, she'd eaten with him for the first time in…a long time.
"Thanks," she shrugged. "You were watching me."
"I…yeah," he nodded. "You are mesmerizing sometimes." Again, his thoughts slipped out before he could catch them. He needed to watch himself. She was heartbroken and the last thing she needed was him hitting on her. He cringed inside, waiting for her response, praying that it wasn't more tears.
"I'm not that great, I promise."
I think you are. He really needed to stop thinking like this. They were beyond this. They'd moved past this. But he couldn't help letting his gaze linger on her a moment too long or resting his hand a little too high on her thigh.
"I would have resented her," she sat on the couch and turned to look at Mark. "I think I already was, resenting her. For making me love her so much that I was willing to give up everything for her."
"You love her. It's not so strange to give up everything for the one you love." I would know.
"I would do it all over again in a second," she said. It was the truth. She would love Arizona again, given the chance. She would fall for those dimples and those bright blue eyes again in a heartbeat. If she had to go back in time, Callie would love Arizona again. "I'm so in love with her. She's in my head, all the time. I hear her voice in my ears; see her face when I close my eyes. I smell her perfume in the air all the time, like she's standing right there beside me. All the time."
"It's only been four days, Callie," he responded softly, coming around to sit by her. "Give it some time."
"Is this how it was with Lexie?"
"Yes and no," he said. He wasn't willing to admit his complicated feelings over Lexie to Callie. Not until he was sure she wasn't broken anymore. Not until he was sure she wouldn't bolt out the front door and never come back.
"It feels like it's been years since Arizona left me, not days. I…I thought I would be with her forever. I thought I would spend my entire life with her. And then she got on a plane to Africa for three years without even looking back. I thought that, maybe, I'd found the one. She was the one. So what do I do now?" Callie laid her head down in Mark's lap. His fingers automatically began smoothing her hair. She wasn't looking for an answer this time, and he knew that. She just wanted someone to listen. She processed things out loud. Someone to be there. Mark had ears. Mark listened. And Mark was always there. "We had plans. We were making plans and then this grant out of the blue just shattered everything. How do you forget to mention that you're moving, possibly, to Africa, if you win a crazy award? How does that slip your mind? Especially when you're sitting at the dinner table, making plans to get married."
If he'd had coffee in his mouth, it would have been spewed across the room. "What?" he asked, stunned. That was news to him. He'd known that Callie and Arizona were serious, but he never expected that. Arizona didn't seem like the marrying kind. She gave up too easily. This, the situation Callie was now in, was proof of that.
"She asked me the night before she found out about the grant," Callie said, smiling sadly at the memory. "We stayed up all night talking about receptions and parties and…and honeymoons in Spain. How does she go from honeymoons to moving across the world in a day, without me? Without even asking me? I thought we were happy."
"You were happy," Mark agreed. "But what if she had given it up? What if she had stayed?"
Callie was silent.
"She would have started resenting you."
"I know." Her tears began falling in earnest, leaving dark circles on his jeans. Her sobs clogged her throat and shook her shoulders. "As soon as I found out about it, I knew we were done. Just that moment, when you see the end coming. You should have seen her dancing around the apartment like a crazy person, mad with happiness. And then she saw my face."
"And?" Mark prompted when she didn't continue.
"And she got mad at me for not being happy for her. But how could I have been happy? I wanted to burn that letter. Go back in time and intercept it and burn it before she could open it, read it. I wanted to erase it from her mind. That letter was the beginning of our end and she wanted me to be happy over it. She couldn't see it. But I could. I didn't know it would come this soon. But I knew it would come."
"Did you ever tell her?"
"No," Callie sat back up. "No. Why would I have ever told her? It just would've ended us that much sooner. Granted," she smiled, "I may not have been left in an airport."
Her smile was breathtaking, it always had been. Except when she mixed it with the broken expression lingering in her eyes. Then it was heartbreaking. She was beautiful, in every way she exuded beauty. He'd thought so since their first meeting in Joe's bar. He hadn't been able to comprehend why anyone would dump her. She was perfection. He looked over at her half hidden face as she stared forward at the blank television screen. Her smile could break the sun free of the clouds. Her eyebrows arched with a hint of sass that he'd always admired. Her cheekbones and jaw held a hint of regality. Her lips were full and perfectly kissable. The trails of her tears over her cheeks were like morning dew brushed over grass. From the moment he'd seen her, all those years ago, he'd never been able to take his eyes off of her. Not even for Lexie. The subtlety of Callie's perfection made him want to adorn her with affection, but he resisted. Because she wasn't his, she never had been, but she always would be.
Callie had the spirit of a wild mustang. He'd watched cowboy after cowboy and even a few cowgirls try to tame her. But you couldn't tame a wild spirit. She thrived on her independence. She was stubborn with her pride. She loved with abandon. Mark loved that about her. And he knew she deserved someone to love her like that.
"You gonna be okay on the couch?" he asked. "Because the bed's open."
"Yeah," she said, her voice quivering. "I'll be fine."
It was an all-encompassing statement. He knew it was true. She would be fine. Eventually. Until she found someone else who would try to tame her and end up breaking her heart again when they realized she could never be tamed. "She's the unlucky one, you know. She lost out on the perfect woman. She could have been happy with you. Now she'll never know."
"It doesn't feel like that," she said, her voice small. "Do you think she'll come back, Mark?"
He thought for a minute. If Arizona came back, Callie would go back to her, after throwing a temper tantrum fit for a queen. Arizona had made Callie dependent, the closest to tame she would ever be. But Arizona had also made Callie happy. But that happiness wouldn't last. Not for Callie. She needed to run free. "I don't know, Cal," he finally said, honestly. "But if she does, she'll be the only one who has."
Mark was inwardly being selfish. He didn't want to lose Callie to Arizona again. He barely heard her mumble, "You're the only one who never left."
