By LuvsRimmer
December 2002
Author's Note/ Disclaimer: Grant Naylor owns Red Dwarf blah blah blah. This story could be interpreted as happening during the timeline of my other Christmas fic "Santa's Little Helper" or as a stand-alone. References to a Christmas Carol belong to Charles Dickens. The Grinch belongs to Dr Seuss. No idea whom either of the songs belong to, but it sure ain't me.
~*~*~
Ace Rimmer propped his booted feet up on the console. Crossing his arms he leaned back and let his mind wander as Sasha scanned the area for anyone requiring his assistance. The days and weeks had flown by into months and it had been over a year since he'd left Starbug.
"Sasha?"
"Yes Ace?" the computer purred seductively.
"What's the date?"
"The twenty-fourth of December, Ace."
He grunted in reply and returned to letting his mind wander. December 24th. Tomorrow was Christmas. Not that he'd be doing anything special. Probably rescuing some damned damsel in distress just like any other day. Or being fed cherry liqueur chocolates. Not like in the old days…
~*~*~
Three million years earlier (more or less)
"Merry Christmas Rimmer!" chirped Lister, shoving a messily wrapped package in his face.
"I told you I hate Christmas, you git! Get that smegging present out of my face."
Lister's grin faded. "Ah come on Rimmer, it's Christmas. Where's your holiday spirit?"
"Bah Humbug." He grumbled, "Now smeg off!"
~*~*~
Or another Christmas, a little more recently…
"Oh come on Rimmer, where's your Christmas spirit?"
"I said no, Lister. You are not hanging those smegging decorations in here."
"Fine Rimmer, go ahead and be a Scrooge if you want." Lister sighed and hefted a box. "Come on Krytes, let's go put these up in the midsection."
~*~*~
He should be happy to be rid of all the Christmas nonsense. Ever since that awful year that his parents had forgotten to buy him anything he'd hated the holiday. Stupid waste of time and money. Stupid decorations. Stupid mistletoe that no one ever tried to catch him under. It was better to be alone on Christmas than to be faced with Lister attempting to play Jingle Bell Rock on his guitar.
Lister was annoying all year long, but especially so at Christmastime. He'd watch It's a Wonderful life over and over, insist on hanging decorations in their sleeping quarters, and give him crappy gifts he didn't want in the first place. What on Io did he need a tie clip that played Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer for anyway?
They had called him names, like Scrooge and Grinch. But he was no Ebenezer Scrooge. There was no ghost of Christmas yet to come waiting to show him the death of a bitter old man. He'd already been to his own funeral. Twice, in fact. And thinking back to the last one, Lister had actually said nice things about him. He may have been a slob and a space bum, but Dave Lister was… well he supposed Dave was his friend. Certainly he was the one person closest to him. And he missed the annoying git. A lot.
Glancing up, he caught the reflection of his face on Sasha's screen. He looked… well frankly… he looked… wistful. He sighed.
"Something wrong Ace?"
He sighed again. "Tomorrow is Christmas Sasha." And I wish I could spend it with Lister.
The latter went unsaid, but she knew it anyway. She knew that this Ace had lost interest in saving the universe and being a hero. He just wanted to go home.
"Ace?"
He looked up.
"I think I can get you home for Christmas."
He grinned, yanking off the blond wig and tossing it on the floor. "Tell me what to do."
~*~*~
I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow, and mistletoe
and presents, by the tree…
