Song lyrics: "Forget Him" by Teresa Teng


"To forget him, is to forget everything."

The familiar baritone voice pricked Lilian's ears.

"To abandon my future and direction, to lose myself..."

Amusement curled her lips when she realised that Duncan was singing. Singing. She had not heard him sing openly after the old gang had snickered at his amateur and near tone-deaf attempts at stringing a melody together. Gods, that was ages ago, when they were still teenagers surviving in the Barrens. He must not have stopped practicing secretly, for his voice was doing at least partial justice to the decades-old song.

Lilian kept her eyes closed, lying still on the top deck of the Defiance - the ship she called home. She listened as the voice drew closer, belting melodic Cantonese syllables to the cool night air.

"To forget him, is to forget happiness completely. To lock my spirit in with bitter pain."

Finally, the heavy thud of combat boots against the wooden floor announced Duncan's arrival. Lilian opened her eyes to find the ork peering down at her through his red-tinted goggles. In one hand he held a six-pack of cheap beer, where two bottles were already missing. One was in Duncan's gloved hand. The other was no doubt tossed carelessly into one of the trash piles that sat along the streets.

"I hope you're not singing about Raymond. 'Cause you know, that's a love song."

"Ugh, shut up," Duncan growled. He sat down next to Lilian, putting the pack of beer between them.

"I'm serious. The man is-was our father."

Duncan pushed his goggles up, turning in place to face the woman who was still lying down. He caught Lilian's elbow and hauled her upright.

"Will you just stop and help me drink this shit," he said. "It tastes like dog piss and ghoul bile." He took a mighty swing from his own can, his face contorting into an expression of utter disgust as he swallowed.

"Wow, piss and bile. Delicious," Lilian deadpanned as she opened a can herself and had a taste. She almost gagged as it slid down her throat, but managed to keep it in. She yanked the flimsy can away from her lips, staring at it in disbelief.

"What the fuck?"

"I know." A deep chuckle rumbled from Duncan's chest. "Worse than the worst beer we had in the Barrens."

"The spirits must have taken a dump in their distillery." Lilian lifted the can to experience the horror once more. "Jesus fucking Christ, this is shit. What a waste of money."

"Well, help me unwaste it then." Duncan finished the last drops of his poison. He crushed the can effortlessly in one hand, and tossed it far into the dark, oily waters. They could not hear its impact against the water, only see the miniscule ripples from where it now floated. The ork reached for another can, ripping the tab completely off before taking a big gulp.

"I thought you stopped drinking," Lilian said. She mimicked Duncan's gulp, but with much more effort. Heavens, spare me from this torture now and strike me down with lightning.

"I did. But I just wanted a little taste, that's all."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with Raymond, would it?"

The silence was all the answer she needed. The mystery surrounding their foster father was a constant source of exasperation and frustration. The deeper they dug, the longer the lies grew. Learning that the best part of their lives was just...what? A facade? A prelude to something more sinister? It was difficult to live with.

"I was just thinking about Gaichu and his team. Watching him kill Ishida... It made me realise that at the end, we may have to do something similar."

"We may have to kill Raymond," Lilian said, to which Duncan nodded solemnly.

"All the runs we've had so far, there have been twists we didn't expect. And this mission we're on, to find Raymond for answers..." He fixed Lilian with a steady gaze, searching. "Would you do it? If we had to kill him. Could you do it?"

Her mouth went dry, prompting another swig from her half-empty can. Each mouthful became easier than the last, with more and more of her tastebuds murdered by the foul brew. She turned away from Duncan, gazing out at the inky black night, pondering the question. Truth be told, she had already thrown this question around her mind countless times. Imagining scenarios, trying to lay down every single possible outcome, calculating all possible decisions. None brought her comfort.

"I would," she answered truthly. "I could. Even if it broke my heart, even if it was like a dramatic trid with Raymond crying and telling us that he loved us all along. If his death meant we could break the curse over this shithole," she gestured at the docks behind the ship they were on, "I would."

She glanced back just in time to see Duncan's expression darken before he stared down at his can of swill. Slight worry crawled into her heart. Duncan always had a stronger sense of loyalty than her. He had refused to accept their foster father's death, chosen to keep seeing him as "Raymond" instead of the man's true identity. Lilian had wondered why. Was it due to the few remaining shreds of loyalty he held to the man? Or just practicality - stick to what you know until new information can be proven right. Either way, whatever he felt was stronger than Lilian.

She always preferred to be practical. Rational. Emotion was just one long path littered with traps that you willingly fell into, then cursed yourself when you got hurt and tried to scrabble out again. She got burnt when she decided to leave Duncan and Raymond behind on an emotional whim, for someone who did not survive for long anyway. Her time in prison was spent burying her heart under layers of blood - both her own and of others who tried to fuck with her. Her brother was the only one who survived the bloody purge - or so she thought.

The last remaining thread of sentimentality showed itself when she received Raymond's message. It would not remain for long - she would be rid of it when all this was over.

"I understand," Duncan finally said, breaking Lilian out of her reverie. "I will do what is necessary as well. You will be the one taking the lead, but I will be there with you, every step of the way. I swear."

"Of course," Lilian grinned, putting an arm around his broad shoulders. "I would have no one else with me. Now..." She drained her lukewarm beer and let out a yell, throwing the can into the sea as Duncan did. Then she went straight for the two remaining cans, tossing one to the ork and taking one for herself.

"Let's get this shit over with. To you, Duncan Wu!" She lifted her can in a mock toast.

"And to you, Lilian Xu." Duncan mirrored her pose and grin.

Together, they took the first big gulp and let out disgusted groans. Then Duncan continued his song.

"All along, it was only him, who helped me appreciate myself-"

"And allowed me to use love again," Lilian joined in a mild-alcoholic rush. "To change everything ordinary into something more beautiful!"

A loud thud sounded off to the side, where a window was thrown open. Gobbet's annoyed yell cut through the night.

"For the love of the gods, shut up! You'll attract the spirits here with your wailing!"