Author's Note: This was written before RWBY Volume 4 came out. I'm certain things will go very differently in the actual show, but I wanted to do my own take on how Yang would deal with what happened to her at the end of Volume 3.

This is the Teen and Up version of the story. The Mature version has been posted on Archive of Our Own under the same title and username.


Chapter 1: Broken

Bleak winter snow covered the fallen leaves outside of Yang's bedroom window. The harsh cold of the season had washed away the vibrant colors of autumn. The beautiful foliage of Patch Island was gone, replaced by skeletal husks of trees and endless fields of dreary white.

Yang watched the dead world outside listlessly from her bed. She wished the winter would last forever, but she knew that a spark of life still lay dormant beneath the snow. Time would move inextricably forward for the rest of the world. The seasons would turn, and spring would come. The color would return, and she would be the only thing left that was cold and dead.

The battle for Beacon had reached its grisly conclusion months ago, but for Yang, it might as well have been yesterday. All it took was the slightest reminder, the slightest tickle of memory, and she was back in the ruined remains of the school's dining hall. She could feel the heat of the flames. She could hear Blake's cries of pain singeing her ears. And most of all, she could see that monster standing over her partner, plunging his sword into her chest.

Many words had been used to describe Yang over the years: strong, confident, cocky, brash. Right now, however, the only word that Yang really felt described her was useless. All the students and teachers of Beacon had fought bravely to protect the innocent people of Vale. Some of them had even given their lives. And Yang had been absolutely useless.

During Yang's time at Signal and Beacon Academies, her instructors had often chastised her for being too reckless when she fought. She'd always dismissed their critiques. She'd told herself that they just didn't understand what it was like to have a semblance like hers. She'd always known her up-close and personal fighting style would earn her more than her fair share of scars, but she'd also known that she would always win in the end. She was Yang Xiao Long after all.

That's why the very second Yang had seen Blake in mortal danger, the only thought in her head had been the overriding need to destroy the monster that dared to threaten her partner. She hadn't hesitated, and she hadn't contemplated the possibility she could fail. She just charged in to do what she did best, knowing that there was nothing the monster could do to her that wouldn't make her stronger.

Oh how wrong Yang had been. In one terrible moment, that monster had shown her that she was not invincible. One single strike from his sword had effortlessly gone through her aura, overwhelmed her semblance, and carved through her body.

Yang had relived that instant in time over and over and over again. It defined her whole world now. Every single day she felt the sword bite her flesh. She saw the metal cleave her bones.

The first few week after Yang had been back on Patch, she'd spent time thinking, trying to figure out where her mistake had been. However, the more and more she thought about it, the more she realized there hadn't been a mistake. There had never been any choice for her but to do all she could to save Blake.

Yang's first night at Beacon was also the first time she'd met Blake. She'd had no idea that Blake would soon be her partner. She'd had even less idea that Blake would quickly become not only her friend but her best friend. She couldn't say why she and Blake had bonded so quickly, but it was undeniable that they had. Unlike Ruby and Weiss, Yang and Blake had come to understand each other from the moment they had locked eyes in the Emerald Forest. They'd fought side-by-side like they'd been doing it for years. They'd hung out like they were old friends. They just worked together without having to work at it.

It had taken Yang by surprise, but one day she'd realized that she was developing romantic feelings for Blake. Yang wasn't sure what to do at first. It wasn't because she was inexperienced in the ways of romance. To the contrary, she'd had a steady stream of boyfriends and girlfriends over the years. But those relationships had all been over quickly, enjoyable though they were. That wasn't what she wanted to have with Blake. Blake meant too much to her to just be another fling.

Yang liked to think she knew Blake better than almost anyone. After all, she knew which eye roll meant, "That pun was funny, but I don't want to admit it," and which meant, "I really wish you would stop talking now." However, she'd never been able to decipher if Blake would have any interest in dating her or not. Yang understood that not everyone was a flexible as her when it came to physical attraction, and she had learned the hard way how simply asking a friend out could have disastrous consequences.

Despite her better judgment, Yang had almost confessed her feelings to Blake during their heart-to-heart just before the school dance that Team RWBY had put on. She had only held back because she hadn't wanted to put any more emotional pressure on Blake. Later at the dance itself, she had spent an embarrassing amount of time watching Blake and Sun together. Blake had always emphatically insisted that Sun wasn't her boyfriend, but Yang wasn't so sure seeing the two of them together. It had made her happy to see Blake being sociable, but her jealousy had been so palpable, she'd practically had to physically pummel it into submission.

Ultimately, Yang had decided that Blake's friendship was more important to her and had just written off her feelings as a silly crush that would fade with time. But her feelings hadn't faded. And when she'd seen Blake helpless on the ground, the emotions that had rushed through her had been so intense that she couldn't deny the truth. Somewhere along the way she had fallen in love with Blake. In that moment, Yang would have sacrificed anything to save Blake. And she had saved her. It had cost her an arm, but she had saved Blake.

And then Blake had abandoned her.

Yang hadn't believed it at first. When Sun had tried to explain to Yang that Blake had run, she had said some downright nasty things to him. Even as she was being helped into the airship returning to Patch, she'd expected Blake to show up. But Blake hadn't come. She really had run. And she had hurt Yang worse than any monster with any sword ever could have.

Yang wondered if Blake knew what she had sacrificed for her. Ruby had always wanted to become a huntress to make the world a better place. It was one of the many things Yang adored about her baby sister. Yang wasn't so noble however. She wanted to become a huntress so she could fight, plain and simple.

Every huntsman- and huntress-to-be was good at fighting. A lot of them enjoyed it too. Yang didn't like fighting; she loved it. It was more exciting than riding her motorcycle dangerously fast. It was more exhilarating than sex. It made her feel more alive than anything else in all of Remnant. It was her life, and now her life was over. Her dad had given her many a pep talk about how there were plenty of things she could still do, but Yang knew he was wrong. Fighting was what she'd been born for.

Maybe it would all have been worth it to save Blake. But Blake had run away. She had spit in the face of Yang's sacrifice. She hadn't even had the guts to say goodbye.

Yang closed her eyes. Thinking about Blake wouldn't help things. On a good day, she could slip into a mental oblivion and lay there numbly as the hours drifted by. But it seemed that today was not going to be a good day. Visions of Blake leaving her behind while she was bleeding and unconscious taunted her. Phantom pains from her missing arm made it impossible to forget what she'd lost.

Resigned, Yang kicked the covers off of herself and slowly got to her feet. It was rare that she left her bed these days. Her legs were stiff from so much inactivity. The old Yang would have been appalled at how sedentary she'd become, but the old Yang was dead.

Yang made her way through the small house to the single bathroom and shut the door behind her. On days like this, when her mind refused to be still, her only relief was to fill the bathtub with scalding hot water and soak in it until the water turned cold. That way she could just float there and pretend she didn't exist.

Yang turned on the bathtub faucet and let the water slowly fill it. She glanced in the bathroom mirror. The creature that looked back at her was absolutely wretched. She was wearing two-day-old clothing. Her mane of blonde hair was greasy and matted. Dark bags hung under her lifeless eyes.

Yang was close enough to the mirror that only her face and shoulders were visible. If she concentrated hard enough, she could pretend that she was whole. But it was just an illusion and she knew it.

Yang took a step back and let the mirror show her how she really was. A sneer worked its way onto her face. Her stump of a right arm was just so pathetic looking, it was almost comical. It was a sick joke, and she was the punchline. Red seeped into her eyes. She could see the monster mocking her. She imagined Blake looking disgustedly at her disfigured body. Yang curled her left hand into a fist and slammed it into the mirror with a cry of frustration.

The mirror shattered. Yang felt tiny shards of glass biting ineffectually at her aura. It protected her just like it was supposed to, just like it always had until it had really mattered.

Yang sunk to the floor and curled into a ball.

Hurried footsteps from elsewhere in the house echoed over the sound of the running water. They grew closer until there was a knock at the door. On the other side, Taiyang said, "I heard a noise! Is everything okay?"

Yang didn't answer. She just curled up even tighter. Tears quietly stained her cheeks.

The door slowly opened. When Taiyang saw the state of his daughter, he rushed into the room. "Oh my poor little girl," he said.

Yang felt two caring arms prop her up into a sitting position. Then her dad was there, hugging her and rocking her gently as she cried.

"Everything's going to be okay, Little Dragon," Taiyang said.

"No!" Yang spat out suddenly. She pushed away from Taiyang. "I wish you'd stop saying that! Everything is not going to be okay! Beacon is crawling with grimm! My friends are gone! Ruby left! And I…I…"

Taiyang took his daughter into his arms again. Yang relented and desperately clutched at his vest. She mumbled, "Why do I always get left behind? Raven. Mom. Blake. Ruby. They all left me."

Taiyang patted Yang's back comfortingly. He said, "Ruby will…Ruby will be back. Just you wait and see."

"I don't care!" Yang shouted, but it wasn't true. The floodgates of her emotion had burst open. She was hideously jealous of Ruby for being out in the world, fighting the good fight when she couldn't anymore. She hated Blake for running away. But more than anything, she longed to have her sister and friends back. Yang's feelings pulled at her until she felt like she was going to be torn in half.

"I don't care!" Yang wailed as if she could make herself believe it. "I don't care! I don't care!"

It had taken an hour for Yang to calm down again. Taiyang had spent the whole time with her, rocking her gently and whispering comforting things to her. Afterward, Yang had returned to bed to let the numbness claim her once again. She had eventually drifted off to sleep.


The next morning, Yang's eyes fluttered open to the sound of muffled voices on the other side of her bedroom door. She heard her dad speaking to someone. She hoped it wasn't more well-wishers. Just about everyone she knew on Patch had visited her over the past few months, and she didn't think she could stand any more well-meaning advice or one more stupid platitude about how everything would get better.

"This isn't funny Qrow," Yang heard her dad say.

Yang was surprised to hear her uncle's name. She figured he'd be running around like crazy, trying to stop Cinder and her minions. Yang rolled over in bed to face the door so she could listen better.

Qrow's unmistakable scratchy voice answered Taiyang, "Does it look like I'm laughing?"

"Why would Ruby go to Atlas?" Taiyang asked.

Yang sighed and closed her eye. Qrow was just here to give Dad news about Ruby it seemed. It sounded like she was out there being the hero she'd always wanted to be. At least one of them got to live their dreams.

"All the leads dried up in Haven," Qrow said. "Guess the kid must've found something that pointed her to Atlas."

"But why would she go alone?" Taiyang demanded.

"I don't know," Qrow said. "I think the other kids are trying to find more clues. The only thing I've heard about going on in Atlas is increased White Fang activity."

Yang's eyes opened. She sat up in bed. Ruby was going after the White Fang? Not only that, she was going after them without what was left of Team JNPR? And uneasy feeling settled in Yang's stomach. It was quite distinct from the haze of crushing despair that had gripped her for so long.

Taiyang said, "But what if she runs into Cinder there!?"

"You can't protect her from the world forever, Tai," Qrow said. "Not with things like they are now. Not when she's the S—"

"I don't care what you or your Brotherhood think Ruby is!" Taiyang interrupted. "She's still my little girl!"

Taiyang and Qrow started to bicker, but Yang had stopped listening. The White Fang were in Atlas, and Ruby was going after them. Yang looked down at her stump. She saw that monster again, only this time he held his sword to Ruby instead of Blake. She couldn't let him hurt her baby sister. She had to do something.

Yang got out of bed. She walked to her bedroom door and pushed it open. The door opened into the house's small living area. Qrow and Taiyang were standing there face-to-face like they were about to come to blows. Their argument stopped the moment they heard the creak of Yang's door.

"Dad, we have to go to Atlas," Yang said deliberately.

"I, uh…We do?" Taiyang asked.

"Ruby's there. She needs our help," Yang said.

"You're right!" Taiyang said, instantly brightening. "You're absolutely right!"

Qrow scratched his head. "That's really not a good idea. Things have gotten really dangerous out there."

Yang said, "Then we'd better get going right away."

"Look kid, there's no way you're going to be able to get a permit to travel to Atlas," Qrow said. "After what happened at the Vytal Festival, the place is practically on lockdown."

Taiyang, who had already produced a suitcase, said, "But you have permission to travel. And I bet you could get permission for us too. I think Ironwood owes you at least that much."

"It doesn't matter what he owes me," Qrow said exasperatedly. "I can't contact him with the CCTTs down."

"Ruby needs us, Uncle Qrow," Yang said with a resolve that surprised her. "So we're going to Atlas."

"You heard my daughter," Taiyang said. He was rushing through the house, haphazardly tossing things into his suitcase. "So are you going to help us or not?"

"This is a bad idea," Qrow grumbled in frustration. He produced his flask and took a long drink. "Fine. I'll help. But you're on your own once you get there! I've still got my own mission."

"Thanks, Uncle Qrow," Yang said. She knew Qrow was right. This was a bad idea. In fact, this might be the worst idea she'd ever had. Even if she managed to find Ruby, what could she really do to help? She'd probably end up being nothing more than a burden. She was once again leaping to someone's rescue without thinking about the consequences, but she couldn't help it. Besides Dad, Ruby was the one thing she had left in this world, and for the first time in months, Yang felt the need to act.


Author's Note: The ending of RWBY Volume 3 could not have come at a worse time for me. It just happened to coincide with a member of my immediate family having to undergo an amputation in order to save their life. Needless to say, I was a bit of an emotional wreck. This story was born from the need for me to sort out my feelings. But don't worry. It's not going to be all gloom and doom. You can't keep Yang down forever.

Constructive criticism is always welcome so please feel free to review or comment. If you want to be notified of updates or send me a message, you can find me on tumblr under the name electronicyarn.