Thriller (The Date from Hell)

Written by…Shadow_Trunks Zero

I don't own anything…(sob) BASTARDS!!

(Video slowly opens up with Leena sitting at her mirror, brushing her long, red hair.  She stops at a sudden knock on the door.)

Leena: Come in.

(Door opens, and Brad walks in, with his hands in his pockets as usual.)

Brad: I've got a message for ya from Bit…

Leena: (eyes perking up) Really?

Brad: Yeah…'said somethin' about meetin' him at his room in ten minutes…said something 'bout taking you to the movies or something…

(Brad leaves the room, leaving Leena alone to pick out her outfit, and get ready for she and Bit's "date". She steps out of her room to find the hallway dark, and her footsteps echo as lightning sounds and the music starts…)

Leena: (thinking to herself) What the hell?  Why's it so dark?

It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart,

(Jamie suddenly appears, but is not totally Jamie…but a decomposing zombie [That looks an awful lot like Jamie] with Jamie's shredded shirt!)

Leena: ! (She tries to scream, but no sound escapes her lips.)

You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed…

Jamie Zombie: (growling and moaning) L-Leeeeena…you smell goooood…

Leena: (Says nothing as she floors it in the opposite direction.)

'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike

You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for life inside a killer, thriller tonight!

Leena: (Still running as fast as she can.) Bit! Brad! Anyone! Help me!

(Jamie still gives pursuit as she knocks over everything in her path to slow zombie Jamie down, and ducks into Brad's room, which is also dark, and carries a faint foul-smelling odor.)

You hear a door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun…

(Door behind her slams shut.  She turns around, to find another zombie that looks a lot like Brad clasping its decomposing hand on her shoulder.)

Brad Zombie: (Licking its rotting lips) Mm…meal…Brad hungry…

You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination
But all the while you hear the creature creepin' up behind
You're out of time…

Leena: (Shivering in fear) N-no!  Stay away!

(She rams through the door, and steps on it, with two zombies in pursuit…only then to notice that two zombies that look strangely like Harry Champ and her father are in her way, cutting off her way toward the exit of the base.)

Harry Zombie: (moaning, while throwing his arms out and barring her passage.) Come be with me, dear Leena!

'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes
You know it's thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight

(She ducks past him and into the hanger.  She starts to climb up to her Gun Sniper, but finds another zombie inside the cockpit that looks like Naomi Fluegal, wearing all of her normal clothing, but shredded.)

Naomi Zombie: Give me your brain, Leena!

Leena: No way! (She jumps off the zoid, and runs outside of the base, to find a figure that looks like Bit with his back turned toward her…)

Night creatures call
The dead start to walk in their masquerade

There's no escapin' the jaws of the alien this time (they're open wide)
This is the end of your life

Leena: (very relieved to see him) Bit, thank god!  I need your help!  These zombies are-

(She stops when she gets a look at his clothing.  He is dressed in his normal battle outfit [the one with the red jacket], but all of his clothing is shredded and torn…)

Bit Zombie: (turning around, to reveal he too is a zombie) They're our friends…join us, Leena…

Leena: Bit?! (She gasps in surprise and fright, and takes five or six steps backward.)

They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side
They will possess you unless you change the number on your dial

(All of the sudden, tons of zombies rise up from under the sand.  Zombies that used to be the Lightning Team, the Zaber Fangs, Leon Toros, some former members of the BackDraft Group, and even Vega Obscura rise from the dunes and line up behind Bit himself.  The rest of the Blitz Team and Naomi Fluegal and Harry Champ limp into the crowd of decomposing flesh, lining up behind Bit to give Leena a long stare down…)

Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together
All thru the night I'll save you from the terrors on the screen
I'll make you see…

Leena: AHHHHHHH!!!!!

(She runs in the opposite direction, only to trip on a large rock, and sprain her ankle, immobilizing her totally.)

Leena: Shit!  I can't get up!

(Bit does some of Michael Jackson's famous dance moves.  All of the rest of the zombies behind him mimic his moves, and start to surround Leena…)

That it's a thriller, thriller night
'Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost who would dare to try
Girl, this is thriller, thriller night
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, diller, chiller
Thriller here tonight!

(All of the zombies start to close in on her hungrily…)

That it's a thriller, thriller night
'Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost who would dare to try
Girl, this is thriller, thriller night
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller…

(All of the zombies proceed slowly, getting as close as possible.  A zombie that looks kind of like Jack Sisco jumps at her, and she knocks him away with her fists as two more leap at her, flashing fangs…)

Darkness falls across the land
The midnight hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize y'awl's neighborhood
And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul for getting down
Must stand and face the hounds of hell
And rot inside a corpse's shell…

(The zombies that used to be the Tasker Sisters leapt at her, bearing fangs and claws.  Leena picks up a nearby stick, and bats them away, snapping it on their heads…)

Leena: Stay the hell away, you piles of rotting flesh!

Jamie Zombie: (After replacing his eyeball, which was knocked out of its socket by Leena's furious assault) RwwwROOOOAAAAARRRR!  I'm going to devour your soul!

Leena: (getting royally pissed now) Not if I have anything to say about it!!!

(She pummels him with her fists again, knocking him down, but the Brad Zombie attacks her from behind, slashing her back with his claws.)

Leena: OW!  BASTARD! (She hits the Brad Zombie, and then twists his arm, snapping it clean off.)

Leena: WTF?

(The Naomi Zombie bits her arm in response.)

Leena: OWW!!!!

The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of forty thousand years
And grizzly ghouls from every tomb
Are closing in to seal your doom
And though you fight to stay alive
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can resist
The evil of the thriller…

(Leena slowly begins to tire, and the zombies are now getting more hits in on her, until finally, she was too weak to fight back.  Suddenly, the Bit Zombie stands above her, leering in pride and joy at the fact he gets to deal the final blow.)

Bit Zombie: (moaning) Leeeeeeenaaaa… Leeeeeeenaaaa…

Leena: (Thinking to herself) Oh no!  This is it! I'm gonna die!

(Bit's voice [The REAL voice of Bit, that is] suddenly sounds in her ears.)

Bit: Leena!  Leena!  Wake up!

(She shuts her eyes, not wanting to see anymore of the zombies, but opens them when she doesn't feel her flesh being ripped off her.  She looks around.  She is back in her room, lying on her bed.  Bit is standing above her, offering her his hand.

Leena: (surprised) Bit? Where are all the zombies?

Bit: (looking at her strangely) Zombies? You've been readin' way too many comics, Leena…

(She sits up, and takes his hand.)

Leena: Well, lets get to the movies…I wanna go watch "Signs!"

Bit: (who really wanted to see "Austin Powers: Goldmember") Okay, sounds fun to me…

(He escorts her to the door, and opens for her, letting her exit the room first.  He stops just as he's about to pass the threshold, and looks back at the camera.)

Leena: (frustrated) Bit, hurry up!

Bit: Just a sec, Leena…

(His eyes turn red, and he grins fangs. The frame freezes there, and we slowly fade out her a loud, evil laughter, ala the Great Vincent Price.)

Well, that's all folks! More from my demented mind, after these messages…