Chapter 1

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I glided silently above the treeline, watching as the full moon slowly rose over the mountains, the soft pale glow of it lighting up the landscape around me. The world itself seemed dead as I flew over it, occasionally catching sight of a small rodent or other animal, flitting through the trees or over the ground. I watched as something flitted into a bush, my shadow floating above it before I moved on.

To them, I was the silent killer, and they were my bait. But... I wasn't out for them. I was out for a very... different... reason.

I angled my wings slightly, making sure that my path would miss the massive mountain that rose in front of me. The sight of the dark beauty in front of me almost made me forget why I was out here. The silent and unmovable behemoth probably held so many years of stories, seen so many things...

The rustling from below me brought me back to the present, reminding me that I wasn't alone.

I looked down, catching a flash of the figure below me, before it was gone again.

So, it was on then. The race against time.

Against...

I tried to pick up my pace, knowing that I had to get back before the figure caught up to me, not knowing if they were aware I was above them, but knowing I had to get back home before they realised it.

Home. The base.

I flapped hard, managing to glide myself over another mountain, watching as the figure took the long way around, finally gaining some ground on them.

As I did, I saw the lower entrance emerge in front of me.

To anyone else, it would look like just a normal rock face on the side of a mountain.

To me... it was my entry point.

I angled my wings, tucking them in when I was at the right point in the sky, diving downwards towards the rock face. As I got closer, I flared, landing almost silently on the soft earth in front of it.

As soon as I hit the ground I started to grow, feathers melding into skin, and my hard beak started to meld into my face.

I was soon myself again, quickly dropping the large and heavy bag I was carrying, deciding that if I had to, I'd leave it outside. My heart was now pounding as I tapped my pockets, trying to-

"Looking for this?" Came a voice from behind me, and I spun around, barely catching sight of something in his hands before his lips were on mine, and I was pressed against the rock.

The sneaky ninja had done it again.

One hand snaked around my waist, as the other pushed against the wall behind my head, hearing a click almost right next to my ear.

I managed to push him away a little, breaking the kiss and hearing the rock behind us start to vibrate a little.

"I hate when you do that" I murmured, then let a small yelp as he pulled me away from the rock face as it started to move, turning me around as he did and holding me against him.

"You love me" Was Donnie's whispered reply as the entrance to the base finally opened up just enough for us to go through. I managed to free myself, turning to look up at him, then half grabbing the heavy bag, and he grabbed the other half.

"Not when you steal my key" I grunted a little as we both half dragged it inside the smallish hanger bay, grabbing the little round watch like object before the entrance closed again.

I stuck it back in my pocket as we dropped the bag, and suddenly he was taking me in his arms again.

Donnie. Just one of four big green ninja turtles.

"I didn't steal it... I just thought you might-" He was cut off by a grunt, and then Ithiell emerged from under what he had been working on, wiping his claws on a cloth. We parted instinctively.

"Are you two done?" He almost snapped, his eyes looking wary as he looked at the bag behind us.

"Yeah, we got more trinkets for you" I grabbed the bag, trying to pull it along, finally being helped by Donnie and we placed it in front of a still frowning Ithiell.

Ithiell...

He really wasn't the same guy anymore.

It had been three months since the news, and he had shut himself off from everyone. I probably would have done the same thing if not for Donnie. He had kept me grounded.

Ithiell, however, had chosen to pull away from everyone, working on a new fighter to get us over there. All his time was spent working on it, all of us wondering...

We had gotten in contact with the Animorphs, and discovered Cassie had gotten in contact with Amanda before everything hit the fan, warning her of their identities being compromised. Last she heard, Amanda would let Robert know, and they would work it out from there. So... if they had gotten out in time or not, we didn't know.

For both myself and Ithiell, we had decided in our minds that they were MIA, until we could find some way to contact or find them. The thought of my best friend being dead...

Personally, I think the thought of her not being around was starting to kill Ithiell inside. If it wasn't for Rtaia, and occasionally myself, pushing him to get sleep and eat from time to time, I don't think he ever would.

"Did you get the-"

"Right here" Donnie pulled out a strange kind of cylinder, with connections on both ends. Ithiell took it, looking it over.

"Doesn't look damaged, thank goodness. Should work well with the new modifications I've built from-"'

They started discussing the mechanics of the ship, which had been mostly built from what we could salvage from Ithiell's old fighter late at night, as well as things we could pick up from the remnants of smashed out stores, and occasionally Bug fighters if they were grounded. That was our mission each night that Ithiell asked for new supplies. Donnie would find the parts that Ithiell needed, and I would shift them into my form, carrying them in the bag we bought along.

Tonight was a good night. We'd managed to break off alot of what was left of Ithiell's old fighter, with the help of a tool Donnie had made, and I had been able to shift the bag into my owl form, with only a little difficulty.

"I better get started on this" Ithiell suddenly turned away, holding the piece in his hands and going to grab something off his bench as he went towards the half built fighter. It looked strange, and distorted. It was partially the nice off white of his fighter, and the black of the bug fighters. From what I could tell, it would be sleek and possibly deadly. It was the only thing I could imagine Ithiell building at a time like this. He would probably want someone to pay...

"Need some help?" Donnie looked at me a little sheepishly as he said this, but I assured him by kissing his cheek and pushing him towards where Ithiell had gone. At least while Donnie was there, Ithiell would be able to talk to someone. Even if it was about engine parts and things I couldn't understand. Having some focus seemed to help Ithiell, at least a little, as well as being able to brain storm. Plus, it would mean the fighter would be built sooner. This waiting was doing my head in...

I tried not to let the worry get to me as I stepped into the tunnel near us, the voices of the two fading a little as I climbed the short set of stairs, emerging into the main room.

Mikey and Kristiana were curled up on one of the couches in front of the TV, and I noticed they had opted to watch a movie we'd had laying around, instead of the horrible news reports that were plastered on every channel. The horror... the chaos...

The human race was fighting back, but more people were being killed than anything. Some were opting to just give up, but all you saw on the television anymore was military fighting the Yeerks, and the Hork-Bajir controllers slicing and dicing people, Dracon beams burning people to a crisp...

And for the moment, there was not much we could do. We'd landed some small blows, but we all knew that wouldn't be enough. For the moment we were kind of stuck in limbo, waiting for Ithiell to work out where to go or what to do.

Leo, however...

"So, another three down here, what about you?" I heard him say as he and Raph stood at the computer screen, looking back at the faces of Rachel and Marco.

"Two, no thanks to Jake" Marco rolled his eyes, his arms crossed against his chest. Rachel looked equally unimpressed.

Strangely enough, Marco and Rachel had taken over the Animorphs, as Jake seemed to have finally snapped about a month back. I honestly don't know what happened, but I heard it was bad. He'd completely lost it, screaming and throwing whatever he could get his hands on.

"So what did the idiot do now?" Raph grunted, almost copying Marco, folding his arms and leaning back a little.

"You... don't want to know" Was Rachel's answer.

"So have you had any security issues?" Leo spoke up again, leaning forward and looking up at them. I couldn't help but move over to them, nodding my head at them when they noticed me, a silent hello.

"No, the Ellimist seems to have made it harder for the Yeerks to find this place, which is a relief at least" Marco now, his features softening a little. I knew he was worried about his dad.

"Now..." Leo stopped when I put an arm on his shoulder, looking up at the others.

"Jade?"

"Have you heard anything?" I asked, and Rachel frowned a little, my heart dropping.

"Jade, we'll keep trying. We have Ax trying to work out-" But I didn't hear the rest, slumping a little in one of the chairs as I felt Leo's hand on my shoulder.

Soon, the conversation turned back to how many smaller Yeerk facilities they'd been able to take out, and what they now had on the cards. Leo had uncovered some more places that we could take out, and Ax was somewhere in the background, doing his alien thing and checking out the locations Leo had found, assessing the layouts...

"Oh, you're on your call!" Came a familiar voice and I looked up to see my mum of all people pop into view, just behind Rachel and Marco.

"Mrs-" Marco addressed my mother formally, and she looked at him, almost pleading.

"Jade is there" Rachel assured her, moving so she could take her place at the screen "You can talk to her"

"Oh, my baby!" I moved into view, in front of the boys, and she looked almost about to cry.

"Are you okay? Are you eating? Are you sleeping well?"

"I'm all right mum, really" I assured her, putting my hands on the desk in front of me and trying to smile at her.

"Oh sweetie, you look so pale, are you sick?"

"No, mum, I'm fine, how are you and the others? Hows dad doing?" I asked, and we had a short conversation about my dad and siblings, then suddenly... shock crossed her face, and she looked at something not far from her. I could see Marco raise an eyebrow.

"Mum.. you okay?" I thought maybe she saw something near her, or-

"Oh, I just realised its almost one in the morning"

"Yeah, it is"

"Sweetie, before I go, I just... I want to say..." Tears came to her eyes, and her lip trembled.

"Oh mum, don't cry" I felt tears spring to my eyes then, hoping she wasn't scared or hurt in some way, or some thought-

"Jade, my darling daughter... Happy Birthday sweetie"

"Oh" I felt slightly embarrassed, hearing the boys make surprised noises behind me "Thank you mum. Love you"

"Love you too baby" She started to cry more then, blowing me a kiss and then she was gone.

"Wait... it's your birthday?" Rachel was suddenly back, a look of surprise on her face.

"Uh... yeah" I muttered, deciding now was the time to move away from the screen, hearing the boys both wish me Happy Birthday.

I was eighteen. This was meant to be a happy occasion, becoming an adult... moving forward with life... having a big party to celebrate.

But...

It just didn't feel right, turning eighteen without Amanda.

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After I'd eaten and cleaned up, I decided to go and hide where most people wouldn't try and follow.

Mine and Donnie's room. We didn't need to share a room... there were plenty, but I just found I felt better, having someone to curl up with, when the worry and the hurt got too much to bear on my own. I missed Amanda, so much more on this day... the day of my birth...

I knew she'd want me to go out and party with her, since in Australia you were legally an adult at eighteen. You could go out and drink, go to clubs...

Her happy face flashed in my mind as I lay in bed, feeling the tears start to flow again. I missed her so much...

I couldn't imagine the pain Ithiell felt when he thought of her. It must have been tearing him to shreds, not knowing, not being able to find out... and having the same fear I had of her possibly being dead...

Same with Robert. I knew he was an asshole alot of the time, but just trying to imagine him not being around, not making idle threats anymore, or walking away with his "whatever" wave he did, just... it didn't seem right.

No Robert... no Amanda...

I wondered if Rtaia felt the same. It was hard to tell with her... she always seemed so calm and composed...

Speaking of, she had been spending alot of time with Serah and Mihra. I think it was to make sure she didn't get hurt. She had become surprisingly protective of Serah, and Kristiana. Maybe that was how she dealt with the events...

I eventually drifted off into a dreamless sleep, waking up what seemed like an hour later to find a body next to me, arm around my waist loosely, as if he was afraid to wake me. I was actually grateful he had come to bed so soon, being able to cuddle into him and feel a little better. I think in a way he knew, because he pulled me close in his sleep, his lips slightly resting on my forehead, muttering something as he slept.

Donnie... the moment we'd found out, he had been there. Through the tears, through the screaming, even through me trying to beat his chest and call him names, none of which I'd meant, he had been the one to hold me up and keep me going. He'd also understood when I pulled away from him. When I sat in the dark and stared at nothing for almost a week. I think I was in denial... or something. Either way, I felt dead for that week.

Kristiana had been there that week, sitting beside me in the darkened room, a quiet presence. I think it helped during that time, just having her there with me. I eventually managed to pull myself out of my stupor, which I think everyone was glad of.

Eventually, I was able to talk to Donnie about it all, calmly, without getting too emotional. He sat there, not saying anything, but understanding and not letting me get too far out of his sight, since then...

The others had been there too, to back me up. Serah had pulled me up, and given me something to occupy my time with. She asked that I teach her some self defense, so she could at least try and protect herself if anything happened. I couldn't help but agree with her, and we had tried to fit in at least an hour a day. She was picking it up quickly.

We had all tried to help Ithiell as well, but... how can you console someone who lost someone so dear to his heart? I

I hoped I'd never have to go through that with Donnie... never have to feel... like Ithiell was probably feeling.

I managed to drift in and out again, feeling somewhat content in Donnie's arms. This had now become the norm for me... I hadn't slept properly in who knows how long. The longest I slept straight through of a night was possibly two hours. Everything else was a broken half sleep, cause all I could think about when I wasn't focused on something was my lost friends...

After what seemed like a few more hours, Donnie woke up which woke me up properly, both of us laying there staring at one another.

"Happy Birthday beautiful" He said finally, pushing a stray hair back from my eyes, putting it back behind my ear.

I felt a slight pain in my chest, forcing a smile for him and saying "Thankyou Donnie"

"Leo told me-"

"Oh, okay then" I cut him off a little, moving out of his arms and going to get up, feeling hot tears start to brim my eyes. I knew he was probably sick of me crying... I was sick of myself bursting into tears at the drop of a hat.

Instead, I busied myself with doing a little tidy up, moving some of his gear to the top of the set of drawers in the room, picking up some clothes and what not that we had both left around.

"Jade" A strong hand suddenly caught my wrist, and I looked up at him, feeling a tear finally slide itself down my cheek. He frowned a little.

"Do you want to talk-"

"No, not really" I pulled away from him, and he let me, standing there and watching me tidy this and that, finally coming over to me again.

"So... eighteen now hey" He took my hands, pulling them up and kissing them a little and making me look up at him again.

"Yeah... it's...not really a happy day" I muttered, feeling a lump in my throat.

"Well, maybe we can make it"

"Donnie, I-" I stopped as he put his arms around me, hugging me a little before pulling away and taking my hand, leading me to the door. He opened it-

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

I jumped, instinctively hiding back behind Donnie before I realised what I was seeing in front of me.

All of my friends... besides Ithiell... were out there, waiting for me. From what I could see, they had made some kind of decorations, which were now all over the main room. A small banner was being held between the girls, who were both grinning like idiots. It read "Happy Birthday Jade"

Splinter and Rtaia were also there, and between Leo and Mikey, there what looked to be a very hastily made cake. Mikey was eyeing the little candle on top, and I noticed Raph was keeping an eye on Mikey.

"Wait, wha-" I lost my voice, Donnie gently pushing me in front of him, hands now resting on my shoulders as the boys brought the cake forward.

"Make a wish Jade" Mikey looked almost happy, and I think if we weren't in the situation we were now in, I would have reacted differently.

"Uh, thanks guys, but I don't think-"

"Come on, we've got some fun things planned" Serah was jumping a little on her heels, grinning at me like an idiot.

"I think you deserve it Jade" Raph said, smiling down at me as the boys now held the cake under my face almost, and I tried to back up, finding Donnie wasn't really moving.

"Guys, I appreciate it, I do, but I just can't-"

"Blow out the candle" Mikey giggled "But... don't forget to make a wish!"

Something in me just snapped. And I am not proud of what I did next.

"NO! GET IT AWAY!" I tried to push it away, instead my hands slammed into the cake, knocking it out of the boys hands and onto the floor. I managed to squirm out of Donnie's grasp, watching as the cake, that I knew was made with all the love they had, hit the floor and exploded everywhere, bits hitting my bare feet.

"Jade!" Splinter scolded, but I couldn't stop myself.

"NO! NO THIS ISN'T RIGHT! I DON'T WANT THIS! I DIDN'T WANT THIS!"

"You didn't want-" Serah started to say but I cut her off.

"No... I didn't want anyone to know about my birthday! I didn't want this at all! I cant..."

I started to panic, grabbing my head in my hands and watching as the others faces all turn to disappointment.

"Jade, maybe-"

"NO! NO! I CAN'T DO THIS! I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT HER!" I finally screamed, turning and running for the exit, hot tears streaking down my face as I ran. I had to get out of here!

"Without who?!" Leo called after me, but I knew he understood who I meant.

I couldn't deal with this day. Not without her. Not without...

Not without Amanda.

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