Chapter one
Lydia pov
As soon as the bell rings i sling my bag over my shoulder and leave psychology. I knew Scott had biology so i go to wait for him first because his class is closest, i was waiting about two minutes before he came out and he greeted me with a stressful smile.
"Hey don't get to stressed out that you wont get your A okay? You will get it just like you got it last year" i say soothingly because i know how stressed he is.
"Yeah i know i just...feel like i owe it to Deaton,you know? He has been so helpful to us in the last...what? Five years." Scott says anxiously.
"Yeah but its that thought right there," i tap his temple gently "that'll get you your A because you'll do it for Deaton"
"Yeah your right," he says giving a slight laugh "what did Stiles and Kira have?"Scott asks.
"Uhhhh," i pause thinking "advanced math" i eventually say.
"Then, lets go"
Me and Scott come to a halt about three classrooms away from there maths class.
"Don't bring up the full moon tonight to Stiles," I plead "he's only just been turned and i feel that full moons are all psychological, that you all feel out of control because you know you should but if he doesn't know then it might be easier...same goes for Liam and Hayden" i say, then realise Scott is staring at me blankly.
"You look way to much into psychology" he laughs.
We carry on walking to their classroom when they both come out looking flustered having a debate.
"Im just saying you only understand that better than me because your a 'fox'" Stiles retorts.
"Or maybe i study" Kira says playfully.
"But do you see my point? Your a trickster you can trick your mind into understanding maths" Stiles says scratching the back of his neck.
"I understand what you mean" Kira says sarcastically whilst she slides her arm around Scott and he does the same.
"Whatever, are we picking Liam up from school?" He asks.
"Yeah and Hayden" i add.
. . .
We all walk along the grass of our college and pile into Stile's jeep, i call shotgun so i can control the music because they all have the worst taste.
"Whats the plan for tomorrow then?" Kira asks, it became a thing after all the trouble in beacon hills died out that we all do something together on a saturday.
"Whats the date?" I ask suddenly remembering something.
"16th of march...why Lydia is something already planned?" Kira obliviously says.
"Allison" i say slowly.
Everyone is quiet for a moment and then Scott murmurs, "she died" i turn around in my seat and look at him and squeeze his hand because we both loved Allison even if it were in different ways thats why me and him are close we both experienced losing someone we loved.
I feel the tears in my eyes before i even think about Allison and her brown curly hair and that amazing smile she used to have. I turn in my seat quickly because if Scott sees my emotion I'm scared he will break down too. I can feel Stiles staring at me and before i can help myself a tear rolls down my cheek. Stiles looks at me and smiles weakly, then he starts the ignition and drives to beacon hills high school.
"Lydia its okay we will go and take some flowers to her grave and spend some time there, we'll tell her how it is going and then go out for her favourite...Mexican" says Stiles.
I know Stiles means well but he only does this because he feels its his fault why Allison is dead, when the nogistune took over his oni killed Allison i know it wasn't actually Stiles in there but void Stiles was and void Stiles is still locked up in him somewhere.
I nod weakly at him and when we pull up the school Liam and Hayden climb in jabbering on about how senior year is dragging and we all tell them to make the most of it, college is hell. We decide to eat out tonight at our favourite burger bar and when we pile out of the jeep theres a new buzz in the group and I'm not sure why. They're all fussing about what they'll have even though we haven't looked at a menu yet when i start to back away.
Thats when i remember. How could i be so stupid and forget? Aiden, he died the same night as Allison. How could i have let it slipped my mind that he died that night. I forgot about the death of the boy who i claimed to love. I hate myself for it i feel ashamed. I want to kick myself for forgetting.
So I just start running because its the best way to escape my mind.
I run past the group and through the dead road. i run through the patch of grass and my legs are aching and my lungs are burning but how could i forget? I don't exactly know where I'm going so i stop,panting hard.
"Lydia!" Stiles deep voice booms.
I whip my head around so that my hair hangs loosely down my back still gasping for air.
"Where are you going?" He says when he's close enough. He's not panting which is weird then i remember he's a werewolf now he has all the physical strength he needs. I can see the pack faintly and they're staring at us.
"Aiden," i pant. Tears fill my eyes before i can help it and im loosing my bearings, " i forgot," i continue " i forgot that he died that night too and how could i be such a stupid cow!" I'm shouting now " i loved him, he gave me his dying breath and i forgot!" I just kept crying i was a reck. I started pulling my hair and scratching myself. I couldn't keep my calm because deep down i knew i still missed him and i haven't really shown that kind of affection to anyone since. Stiles put his hands on my arms and ordered me to look at him and calm down.
Stiles stares at me not like I'm crazy but like I'm the only thing in the world worth looking at.
"Come here" he says gently.
I go slowly to his arms and he puts a hand in my ruffled hair and the other on the small of my back. Im motionless i just stand there all limp. The only person i want to be with right now is stiles not the rest of the pack. I kiss him on the cheek when i withdraw as a sign of thanks and his eyes glow the cold blue they are for killing Donovan which i hope is not the full moon taking affect and then all of a sudden i feel sympathy for him that he had to take someones life and that i wasn't really there for him.
"Come on lets go" he says.
Stiles walks a few steps ahead of me so i grab his hand to keep up, he just looks down at my hand and smiles. When we reach the rest of the group no-one says anything about my running off, it wouldn't surprised me if they all listened in to the conversation. When we go inside we all cram into a booth, I'm opposite Stiles, Hayden is next to me opposite Liam and then Scott is next to Liam with Kira opposite him. We all order the same; double cheeseburger, completely plain, curly fries with double ketchup on the side and we all have cokes. No-one mentions why i ran off and I'm thankful because no doubt my eyes are puffy and my cheeks blotchy. We start talking about Hayden's birthday which is in a week and secretly i'm looking forward to it.
"So what do you plan on doing?' I ask her. We've became really close since her and Liam started dating and i beg that she will ask me to throw her a party.
"Im not sure," she hesitates " parties aren't my thing," she shrugs, "maybe just a meal out?"
We all look at her in silence, this is typical Hayden.
"I think its a great idea" Liam says and pats her hand.
"how about i throw you a party, at my lake house" i chime in. Everyone nods in agreement accept Hayden. "I don't know...i mean how big would it be?" She asks
"As big as you want it, i will plan it so that everything works with you" i add.
It takes a lot of persuasion but eventually Hayden agrees and we all go back to Stiles' to watch a film, on the way there we all called in to a shop to buy some popcorn and went home to pick up our pyjamas. An argument broke out about what film to watch so i slipped out of the back door for some air, i see someone from the corner of my eye i don't need to see his face to know its him, i can tell from his build and his veiny arms that its Stiles. I look up at the moon and realise its a full moon and i don't want stiles out here to see, i want him to learn control, i want to see if my theory is right.
"Hey" he says.
"Hi" i offer. I turn around and see he's looking at the moon, his eyes shine blue then return to usual.
" so you really didn't think i would realise its a full moon" he says his lip curling into a smirk.
"Yes i did actually," i laugh then shiver because of the night air and the fact i have short pyjamas on "A bit stupid i suppose" i carry on.
"What," he says "short pyjamas or trying to hide the full moon"
"Both i guess," i say "So you listen to so my conversations with Scott or anyone for that matter" i say a little to innocently.
" i can't help but focus on your voice," he says with a hint of admiration i cant help ignore.
"Do you want a jumper?" He asks, i nod my head and follow him to his room.
His room has dark blue walls, with a bookshelf that has thousands of books and a desk chair that has claw marks on, he's still learning i guess. He gets me a jumper that says beacon hills lacrosse on it. I put it on and i have to say it is the softest thing i have ever tried on. I'm rolling the sleeves up and when i look I see Stiles with fangs and sideburns he is clinging on to his bed frame and panting. He lost control and i don't know what to do. I'm un prepared.
