Can't Make You Love Me
By: Lilly
Disclaimer: I do not own Hokuto-chan, nor Subaru-kun, nor Sei-chan, nor TB in general. I'm just having some fun with the characters and their relationships. Thanks to CLAMP for inventing such charming characters. The random lyrics spread throughout the story belong to the songs "One Kiss From You" and "Can't Make You Love Me", both sung by Britney Spears. XD
Warnings: Shounen-ai, some sexual content [S/H], and spoilers for Tokyo Babylon, especially the last volume.
Pairings: Seishirou/Hokuto, and some Seishirou/Subaru
A/N: The idea for this fanfic came from one time when I was chatting with my friend 'Rion-ku so I thank her for giving the idea for S/H and the name of Hanako for a special character. *Glomps Marion* Please R/R and I hope you enjoy this story. Oh, and don't think I don't like S/S, I love it, but Marion's and my twisted minds came up with this couple and thought it'd be interesting. Hokuto seems rather OOC, but I tried to keep her as IC as possible. Sorry for the major OOCness. :D
I'm looking for one kiss goodnight
To last all my life
I was held in the arms of the man I loved, but not in any loving embrace. He was going to kill me, I knew it, and accepted it. I gave my life to him, because I wanted to protect the two persons who, aside from him, I loved the most: my brother Subaru and my daughter Hanako. I felt his breath so close to my face, one of his arms around me, his one good eye watching me, as an eagle watches it's prey before striking. I started to cast my final spell, the one that would assure that in the future, Subaru and Hanako won't meet the same fate as me. He only laughed as he felt my omnyouji powers, probably thinking I was trying to save myself. "I love you Sei-chan, nothing will ever change that, not even your position as Sakurazukamori, but I can't let you harm the ones I love." I said to him. He answered with one of his fake, yet charming smiles "Awwww Hokuto-chan, I really love you too. It's really too bad you chose to give your life for your brother and Hanako-chan, but that doesn't mean I don't plan to kill them too."
I felt the tears builiding in my eyes as I looked at him, it disappointed me that he thought like that. "Seishirou... do you really hate us, the Sumeragis that much?" I asked sadly. He lifted my chin and gave me a soft, yet empty kiss, "No Hokuto-chan, I don't hate you. But you know why I have to kill Subaru-kun... And Hanako, well... she cannot be a Sakurazuka and Sumeragi at the same time, so she must die as well... As for you, my dearest Hokuto-chan, you're choosing to willingly give your life to me. I never wanted to kill you, really, but..." he let the sentence trail off, he lifted his free arm, ready to let it plunge into my chest, but before he did, I warned him. "Sakurazuka Seishirou, you have been cursed. May you ever try to kill Subaru or Hanako the same way you're killing me now, the spell will be reversed and you'll be the one to meet the ultimate ending..." I saw that arm, that hand starting to move in my direction. "Sayonara Sei-chan... aishiteru..." In those brief seconds before he pierced my heart I felt the memories flying through my mind... since the day I met Seishirou...
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I'm just a girl with a crush on you
Subaru had met him in the Ikakoburo train station. Subaru had been following the shikigami that had escaped him, and he had been reading a newspaper while waiting for the train. Subaru attracted his attention, because he knew that my brother was the boy he had met a long time ago, the boy that had been sent to exorcise the Sakura Barrow. Of course at that time I didn't know him, nor Subaru knew who or what he was. He had forgotten that older boy whom he had seen killing a girl. I think my twin fell in love with him since he saw him. He was Sakurazuka Seishirou, veterinarian, or so he said when he met him...
Don't care about money
It doesn't give me half the thrill
I will never forget the day I met him. I went to the shopping center with Subaru, we were looking for the newest trends so I could make a cute outfit for him when I saw him, waving at my brother and calling him. "Seishirou-san!" Subaru yelled and ran to him. "Hey Subaru! Wait for me!" I yelled and ran behind him. He was beautiful: tall, raven hair, sunglasses that, as he lowered them, allowed me to see those exotic amber eyes, a charming smile. I couldn't help but watch him, in some sort of trance, which was broken as the man spoke: "Why Subaru-kun, aren't you going to present your friend to me?" Subaru blushed at the endearment and answered: "Seishirou-san, this is my sister Hokuto, and Hokuto-chan, this is my friend Sakurazuka Seishirou." Seishirou took my hand and kissed it, a gesture I found irresistible. I think it was at that momement when I fell in love with him, with the Sakurazukamori hidden under the facade of a vet, with my would-be assassin... I was so innocent then... my twin and I both fell to the charm of this man.
To the thought of you, honey
So tell me that you want me still
We started going out together, but I could see that Seishirou, or rather, Sei-chan as I had come to call him, was much more interested in Subaru than in me. It must have because Subaru was the first of us he met... was my innocent explanation. It was hard not to feel jealous of him, but Subaru was my brother after all, so I didn't show it. On the other hand, I kept trying to get them together, because my twin was too shy to admit that he liked the older man. Both Seishirou and I were always trying to make him admit it, but to each comment we made, he blushed and denied it. It was in those moments when I so wanted to tell Sei-chan what I felt for him, to tell him that Subaru would never admit it, that I was there for him. That I loved him with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my being. But then I took a look at my brother, saw him Seishirou smiling lovingly at Seishirou, or so I thought at that time, and it was all I needed to stop myself from ruining my twin's and my best friend's life. Because that was what I thought we were: best friends.
If only I could trade the fancy cars
For a chance today, it's incomparable
Neither of them knew that I would give everything I owned: the house we had back at Kyoto, the money, the status, the power, my own life... just to be in Subaru's place. Just to be the one Sei-chan looked at with love. To be the most important person in his life. But I knew it was impossible to even think of confessing my feelings to him, because I knew it would break Subaru's fragile heart. And I couldn't do that to him. He was my brother, my other half, my twin... to love Seishirou was like betraying him. I couldn't help loving him, but I what I kept it to self, for Subaru's sake.
I might be sitting with the movie stars
Everybody say that I have it all
I remember it as if it had been yesterday, the day Seishirou invited us to take a holiday to the hot springs with him. That time Subaru wasn't feeling well, now I wonder whether it had been a natural illness, or if Seishirou did it because he knew what I felt for him. I will never know, but knowing now what Sei-chan was, I think that could have been possible. I told Subaru that I'd remain with him, that I'd take care of him, that I couldn't leave him alone because he was sick. But he said he'd be alright, that it was just a cold, that I should go ahead and have fun at the trip. I should have stayed at home. It would have saved me a lot of the problems that followed. But in that moment I began having selfish thoughts. I was thinking: this is my oportunity, my chance to be alone with Sei-chan... maybe even to tell him that I love him...
But I can't make you love me
Is it my life or the things I do?
Subaru finally convinced me to go with Seishirou to those hot springs and told me to have fun. In his innocence, he didn't even imagine what I felt for Sei-chan, nor that I would betray him that day. Sei-chan picked me up at 11:00 a.m. He took my arm and led me to the train station. I didn't show myself any different than my usual happy, cheerful, self. I even made jokes about how he and my brother made the cutest couple ever. He just laughed at every comment I made and smiled that smile that made me melt like butter. But I didn't let him know that, or so I thought. He probably could read my heart like a book. That seemed like one of the longest trips I ever had, even if took just about an hour, since the springs were really close to the city. But I felt so happy, I was finally alone with Sei-chan, without Subaru, as selfish as it sounds.
Can't make you love me
I'm just a girl with a crush on you
Sei-chan and I entered the place where the hot springs were. It was a nice, quiet place. Besides the hot springs, there was a small inn, and a small park where you could go and take a walk in the cool, spring air. Simple as it was, I found myself liking the place. It was a change from the city where I had spent the last 3 months, and also a from the my place back in Kyoto. The hot springs made it a very romantic sort of place, and the smallness of the place made it feel more intimate. As it wasn't any special holiday, just any other weekend, there were very few people in there. I was bursting with happiness, inside and outside. I bounced in my usual way, showing Sei-chan how happy I felt. "Wai! Sei-chan! This place is wonderful! I love it! But I wish Subaru was here too." I said, though I'm not sure if I really meant the last part, as I was feeling really good being along with the man I loved. "I'm glad you like it Hokuto-chan, I'm sorry Subaru couldn't be here.. Maybe some other weekend I'll bring you both back here!" he said, still smiling that wonderful smile, but his dark glasses covered his eyes. I wonder what was in those eyes then.
I have been through changes, yeah
But I'm still the girl you used to know
When we arrived we checked into the inn. The room they gave us was small, as the inn itself, but it was cozy. It had a small living room, with a tea table and cushions to sit on, a bathroom with an almost too tiny tub, and a bedroom. The bedroom had a closet, so we put the few things we brought there. The bedroom was quite small, as I noticed. There were no futons in the closet, so took a look at the rest of the room. I found out there was only one bed, a discovery that me blush. Large enough for two people, but still, it was only one. Probably Seishirou deliberately ordered this room for us, a room that seemed a sort of honeymoon room. But that gave me some hope: maybe he does love me after all... were my thoughts at that moment. I looked at Seishirou, who watched me with amusement in his amber eyes, and a soft smile. "Seems that this cute blush runs in the family, ne?" he asked as he touched my blushing face with one hand, which only made me blush more. "I'm not blushing!" I finally managed to say, "I... I just think it's a bit hot in here." I said, which was also truth, I felt hot, but not because of the room. And the fluttering in my insides hadn't even slowed down. Seishirou laughed and said: "Then maybe we could go for a walk." He took the picnic basket we'd brought with one hand, and slid his free arm around me.
It's made me no different
So tell me why you had to go
We went to the park together. It was bigger than I had noticed before. There was a small lake with ducks, and fish, and frogs, and water lilies. Also there was a path to walk around the gardens, which were beautiful, filled with all sort of spring blossoms. And there were lots of sakura's in full blossom. It was beautiful and I loved it! I looked at Seishirou, who was still smiling and still had his arm around me. He seemed to enjoy the landscape too, though he seemed especially interested in the sakuras. "Do you like cherry blossoms Sei-chan?" I asked. He smiled and took a petal that had been blown by the wind in his hand. "Of course, they're lovely aren't they?" he asked. I smiled back, "Hai, they're lovely."
So tell me why you had to go
Oh baby, I will trade the fancy cars
After a while of just walking around we found a small place to sit and eat. I had wanted to make something really special for Sei-chan, but he said he'd take care of the food. He brought Chinese food. Chop suey, fried rice, wonton soup, dumplings, and lots of other delicious things. "Wai! Sei-chan! I just love Chinese food! Arigatou!" I screamed in delight, bouncing up and down, and hugging Seishirou. He chuckled and hugged back. "Glad you like it Hokuto-chan! I didn't know if you'd like to eat Chinese but I think it's a change from the Japanese food. And wasn't it the point of this trip?" I giggled and sat down and started to eat everything Sei-chan had brought. He sat next to me smiling, and eating whatever I let him get his hands on. He suddenly laughed. I blinked and just watched him, as my mouth was full of dumplings. "I was just thinking, that it's funny that you love food so much, but Subaru-kun seems to have a problem with it." he said. I swallowed and then burst into laughter with him.
For a chance today, it's incomparable
I might be sitting with the movie stars
Everybody say that I just have it all
We finished eating after a while, and a pause followed, an uncomfortable one. Seishirou stretched himself onto his back and I leaned back into the sakura tree behind me. How ironic that I would die as his hands and for a sakura. But I didn't know that then, didn't even imagine it. As I watched Seishirou I only saw an extremely attractive and handsome man, who was 9 years my elder, but who I loved more than anything or anyone else, save my brother. I couldn't keep my eyes of him, and he probably knew I was watching him intently. We remained like that for what seemed a long time, then he gave me a seductive smile and suggested, "Why don't we go try those hot springs?" I blushed again but replied "S...sure, w-why not?". I quickly composed myself and smiled cheerfully again as I started picking up the remains of our lunch. I couldn't believe it! I was so happy, but I felt as I had just betrayed my brother by accepting. Though not for the only time that day.
But I can't make you love me
Is it my life or the things I do?
We went back to the room to leave the remains of our picnic and grab some towels, then we headed for the spings. I was so nervous, my mouth was getting dry, my head was spinning, my insides never stopped fluttering. But I was not going to let Sei-chan know about, though he probably felt it. I grabbed Sei-chan's arm and walked happily as if we were heading to the shopping mall instead of bathing springs. We finally reached them. There were three areas: one for men, one for women, and one for couples. I started heading to the women's area, but Seishirou grabbed my arm, "Aww Hokuto-chan, you're not leaving alone are you?" he asked, a small pout on his face. I sighed, and almost dropped the stuff I had in my hand, but I clung harder to it instead. "A-are you sure Sei-chan? I-I don't think we shouldn't. I mean, what about Subaru?" I asked. "Well, Subaru is not here, and don't you think it'd be boring being alone in there?" I couldn't believe he asking for us to bathe together. It's wrong, he's in love with Subaru, he should bathe with him, not with me. I shouldn't accept... I thought and started walking to the women's again, but he pulled my arm harder. "Please Hokuto-chan, allow me the honor of your company. Aren't we friends?" he insisted. "That is the point Sei-chan, we're just friends, we can't do that. Sub-..." I was cut off as he softly kissed my lips, for the first time.
Can't make you love me
I'm just a girl with a crush on you
My heart stopped, my mind was spinning, feeling his warm lips against mine. This is not happening, he's NOT kissing me, I MUST be dreaming, it's.... it's... I started to lightly kiss him back, but then I thought of Subaru, and how much this would hurt him, would he ever find out. I softly pushed Seishirou away. "Seishirou... I... we shouldn't have..." I started, but he put his finger on my lips. "Shh... please come with me Hokuto-chan." he asked again. This time I just nodded and followed him inside.
Just the thought of being close to you
It's incomparable
We went into the dressing rooms, or rather, undressing rooms. I looked away when he started to take off his clothes, and I shyly took off mine, quickly wrapped myself in a towel. "Ready yet Hokuto-chan?" he asked. "Hai..." I said softly, and slowly turn around. He had covered himself with a towel too, or at least his lower half. I felt myself blushing, as I saw this attractive man in front of me. He was strong, his muscles stood out from his body, I couldn't take my eyes off him, nor stop blushing so hard. I felt him gazing at me in the same way, though which thoughts crossed his mind, I cannot say.
Should be happy with the life I live
And the things I do
Seems like I have it all
I walked to the springs slowly, he following me close behind. He was the first to get into the water, however. He dropped his towel, and I shut my eyes, though it was pointless, after all, I couldn't keep them closed all the time. He had his back to me, so I took the oportunity to drop my own towel and get into the water myself. I fel the heat of the vapor around me, not at all an unpleasant sensation. I found a spot on a rock and sat on it, pulling my knees close to my chest. Seishirou finally turned around, smiling. "Feels nice, ne?" he asked. I nodded, still blushing, still thinking it was utterly wrong. He swam and leaned close to me, obviously not caring about the situation we were in. "Um... Seishirou... is this ok? I mean, aren't you like cheating on Subaru?" I asked, my concience nagging at me. He just stood there smiling, then leaned in closer and kissed me again. I felt the heat rush to my face again, but this time, I did kiss him back. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him, and that was all it took for me to lose my shred of control. I felt my own arms sliding around his neck, responding to a kiss which became more passionate each second. When he finally broke the kiss I was out breath.
Can't make you, make you love me baby
It's my life, what can I do?
"S-Seishirou... I..." I started to say, and then felt the water splashing my face. "Sei-chan!" I yelled, and splashed him back. Leave it to Seishirou to start playing around when I was just about to tell him my feelings. I turned around but I saw he nowhere. I turned around again and he jumped at me, splashing me with water again. And I responded again, I truly enjoyed that trip to the springs. We spent a long time playing around in the water like that, giggling and laughing at each other, and I do admit that, at that moment, Subaru was driven out of mind. Suddenly I felt arms wrapping around me from behind, so I turned around and saw him looking at me with loving eyes. So... so he does love me and not Subaru? I asked myself. He kissed me, for the third time that evening, and I just felt myself melting into his arms, loving the feeling of him holding me like that. I tried to tell myself that wasn't fair to Subaru, that it would hurt him, but in my minds those arguments stopped working and I just gave myself into Seishirou's kisses and caresses. Soon he lifted me out of the water, walked out, and wrapped us in the towels. Then he picked up our clothing, and carried it and me back to the room at the inn.
Can't make you love me, alright
I'm just a girl with a crush on you
When we got back to the room he stopped just enough to let the clothing fall, and then placed me on the single bed in the room. Both of us wearing only a towel. He lay on top of me and started kissing my neck, and I couldn't help but cling to his hair and moan in pleasure. He started to push my towel aside, as his kisses moved lower and lower on my body. I managed to look down and blush. He had let his towel fall aside too. I felt his hands all over my body and cried out, wanting to feel his body against mine, his lips over mine again... And then as quickly as it all had begun in the springs, it ended. "Aishiteru Seishirou..." I managed to say. "Aishiteru Hokuto-chan..." was his reply. Though whether he meant it or not is something I'll never know. But at that moment, it felt so right to be there with him, so much that I didn't even care of what Subaru might think when we got home. I loved this man more than life itself. I give my life to you Seishirou, and I'd give my life for you... I thought. Who would know how true these words would become.
I'm sooooooo evil!!!!!!! ;_________; What I just did to Hokuto-chan is just sooooo evil!!!!!!! *Cries* I hope you like it, as it's my first attempt at at TB fanfiction. I hope Hokuto and Seishirou weren't too OOC. How nice of me to cut off at such an interesting point, but luckily for you, I continued this right away. I only cut it so it wouldn't be too long for one chapter. Still, this is supposed to be a short fic so the ending is in the next chapter. So go and read it, and review it, please.
