So this is MY commentary on the story dubbed the worst fanfiction ever to have graced this site! Review, laugh, sit there going 'whaaaaaat?', run away screaming, do whatever you want, I don't really care! But I'm gonna post this now and go because I have a hairdressers appointment! What normal person goes to a shop to have scissors held dangerously close to their neck by a stranger, anyway? Me!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Tara Gilesbie or whoever owns 'My Immortal' and I'm very glad that Tara Gilesbie does not own Harry Potter.


Chapter 1. (This is your first and only warning. If you value your a) sanity b) ability to write c) time or d) innocence, then leave now.)

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) (hahaha! No.) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) (what are we supposed to think? Good friend? Nobody says that! 'And this is my good friend, Cinderella. She is my goodest friend in the world.') raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin (Bieber!) ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! (well, that makes sense. They deserve each other!) MCR ROX!

Hi (hey!) my name is Ebony Dark'ness (what is with the random apostrophe?) Dementia (Dementia's serious! You're not funny! Idiot.) Raven (Named after a bird?) Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) (well, didn't your parents go out of their way to be original?) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears (limpid tears?) and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). (can I?) I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. (… as opposed to…? And you're a pretty crappy vampire if you don't have fangs. Dracula pwns you.) I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, (ohmygod no) and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England (clearly Geography is not your strong point, and neither is the English language) where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) (haha, you know what? I had a feeling!) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example (do you have to give us one?) today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets (oh, bravo, very gothic) and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, (just to make yourself even paler?) black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining (oh, Hogwarts and its magic weather system!) so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them. (N'aww, did somebody wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?)

"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy! (Oooh, it's da sex bomb! Please don't tell me she's going to make my Draco all emo and gothic…)

"What's up Draco?" I asked.

('I throw my wand up in the air sometimes, saying ay-oh, my name is Draco!' Draco sang. Nah, not really. But wouldn't that be so cool?)

"Nothing." he said shyly. (Draco Malfoy? SHY? PAAAAHHH!)

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away. (… and that conversation achieved absolutely nothing. I have more interesting conversations with my celery.)

AN: IS it good? (nope!) PLZ tell me fangz!