I looked out the window of the diner that I was sitting in while my glass of water in front of me. The weather outside was great. The sun was shining and the birds, the ones that were still awake at night, chirped and flew around the area. People walked around the square that was right outside the front door of the diner in groups as they chatted happily and played silly games all because of the summer heat.
I took a pen off the booth tabletop behind me and started doodling random designs on the napkin that was set for my water glass. I listened to the people talk in the diner and smirked as some of them cracked jokes that were so cheesy I wondered if they got them from Christian or Adrian. I listened to the gossip that circulated around by the older Moroi women and scoffed at it like the men did. It seemed like nothing changed in these parts.
Court, Pennsylvania was part of the most rural part of the state. A Moroi and dhampir community, Court was a charming little town. Nothing changed, no one left, nowhere was like this place.
Louisa, the little waitress that worked at the diner since she was about fifteen, came and refilled my glass. She smiled at me sweetly and went to take care of Old Man Stan who sat in the same spot every Sunday afternoon and ordered the usual steak, potatoes, and peas.
I went back to listening to the people talk and my doodles when I heard the bell on the door ring. My ears pricked again as they always did when the bell rang because my back was to the door. I ignored the people that came in until they passed me. Something, actually some smell almost knocked me out of my chair. His smell.
I looked up from my doodle just enough to spot him and his two friends sitting down to a booth that was in front of me on the other side of the room. My hair fell in my face, shielding my eyes from him.
He sat facing my direction with Eddie on his right and Ivan across from them. His brown, shaggy hair was pulled up into a ponytail only to keep it out of the horses' faces when he's working at the barn or when he's training while Eddie and Mason. His brown t-shirt that hugged his muscled body and his jeans fit him perfectly while resting on his hips. His work boots were still dirty from a days work and made barely any noise because of how worn down they were. And even with sweat, sweet hay smell, and the dustiness from the roads, I could still smell the aftershave that he probably put on yesterday night.
Out of all of the places in this little town
Yeah, you had to come walking in here and sit down
I'm hiding and hoping my face ain't too red
Since we been over, been trying like crazy to get you out of my head
I debated about leaving, going up to him and talking to him, slapping him, or just staying put. I was torn between yelling and screaming at him for leaving or running over to him and telling him that I've missed him and to please come back. But something deep inside me told me that even though I loved him like crazy, I needed to let him go.
I didn't have to make the first move though. As I stared at my doodles, a shadow passed over me and the table and stopped. I looked up to see Dimitri and watched him sit down across from me.
"Hey, Rose. How are you?" His voice sounded light and happy, like he was talking to one of his friends, not his ex-girlfriend.
"I'm fine thanks," I answered simply.
"You're looking good. New dress?" He nodded towards the light pink floral dress that I had on.
"Yeah, Lissa and Mia bought it for me."
I looked down at the table again. I felt my will and my small talk attitude start to fall apart. His closeness was making me fall apart and I was so close to leaping across the table to hug him. I was still in love with him.
So
Why you wanna
Show up in a old t-shirt that I love
Why you gotta tell me that I'm looking good
Don't know what
You were thinkin'
You were doing
Moving in for a hug
Like you don't know I'm coming unglued
Why you gotta
Why you wanna
Make me keep wanting you
"How's training been?"
I nodded. "It's been good. Been working hard." Small talk.
"Good. It seems to be paying off. I heard about hat Strigoi attack near your farm. Well done." Dimitri's voice was praising and proud, but I knew that he wanted to be in on that fight as much as any dhampir.
"Thanks. I was just doing my job." Another simple answer.
Dimitri was quiet for a moment. "New lip gloss?"
"Mhmm."
"It looks good against your tan."
What was wrong with this guy? He was being nice to me when I wanted him to just leave me alone, but that wasn't exactly true either. I wanted him to be mine again, not solo or even Tasha's, the girl he left me for. Mine. M-I-N-E. Rose Hathaway's.
I mentally sighed as I looked away from those smoldering brown eyes that sucked me in every time I looked into them. They usually were guarded except for when he was with me or his friends. Now, they were always free and full of life and emotion. Something that I felt special about when I was able to get him to show me those kinds of eyes.
I wish you had on sunglasses to cover up those blue eyes
I wish you said something mean maybe glad you said goodbye
Why can't you look off somewhere if you catch me staring at you
Why can't you be cold like any old good ex would do
"Haven't seen you around the stables lately. The horses miss you."
I smiled a little at the news. Dimitri and I were always at the stables. When he worked, I always took care of the horses and they'd let me ride them. I loved the beasts and they tolerated me, which was new. But once Dimitri and I were history, I hadn't made an effort to go to the places that reminded me of us, including the stables.
"I've been busy with helping Lissa and Mia at the store. Their business is booming so they asked me to come in sometimes to help out." It wasn't a total lie, but it was better than telling him that I didn't want to see him in fear of throwing myself at him and regretting it later when I was rejected.
"Makes since. Eddie and Mason said that those two girls were doing good with their store." Dimitri sounded thoughtful and happy four our mutual friends.
"Yeah." My voice trailed off into another silence.
I felt his eyes on me and I could only imagine what was going through his head. His face gave nothing away but the face of a happy-go-lucky man that worked on his family farm with his best friends. I could tell you though, that he knew just how uncomfortable he was making me. He was extremely observant and could always read me like an open book. He knew just how much I wanted to run and hide from him before breaking down into gut wrenching sobs. He was just not letting me have the opportunity.
So
Why you wanna
Show up in a old t-shirt that I love
Why you gotta tell me that I'm looking good
Don't know what
You were thinkin'
You were doing
Moving in for a hug
Like you don't know I'm coming unglued
Why you gotta
Why you wanna
Make me keep wanting you
Keep wanting you
I felt the pen being taken out of my hand and looked up startled to see Dimitri holding it between his graceful, callused fingers. He took my hand and wrote down a number on my palm near my thumb. He put a D underneath it and released my hand.
"My new number. I had to get a new one after Lucky stepped on it when I tried to put new shoes on him a week ago. You should give me a call and we can hang out or something. We could even go down to Stan's for a drink and a game of pool." He sounded so hopeful. He wanted us to be friends again.
"If I have time, I'll try. It sounds like it could be fun."
I let a fake smile slide onto my face as I told a white lie. I knew that I would never call him unless I wanted my broken heart to be shredded again and again. I knew it wouldn't be enough for me to be around him one night for a couple of beers and a game of pool. I needed him like the air I breathed, like the crops needed rain, and the hot days need a nice breeze to cool everything off. It wouldn't ever be enough until I had him in my arms again.
Why you wanna
Show up in a old t-shirt that I love
Why you gotta tell me that I'm looking good
Don't know what
You were thinkin'
You were doing
Moving in for a hug
Like you don't know I'm coming unglued
Why you gotta
Why you wanna
Make me keep wanting you
"Dimitri! We gotta go! Your mom just called and said that the rain is coming soon so we need to get the hay in," Ivan announced from across the aisle. I made eye contact with Eddie and noticed that he had a sad look in his eye. I hadn't really talked to him since the break up. I missed him.
Why you gotta
Why you wanna
Make me keep wanting you
Dimitri stood up and looked about ready to go until he paused. Looking down at me, he smiled.
"It was good to see you again, Rose. I hope we can talk later. Catching up should be interesting." He smiled his amazing full smiled and I felt a part of me burst out in tears. At the sight of it.
"Yeah, it should," I agreed in a small voice.
Dimitri reached out towards me as if going in for a hug, but stopped himself. He must have noticed that I wasn't in the mood, and too heartbroken to really do much than to just sit here in my seat.
Why you gotta
Why you wanna
Make me keep wanting you
I watched as the boys left the diner and load up into Dimitri's battered Chevy truck. He pulled out with the guys in the bed and headed towards his place. When the dust that he had kicked up from the road settled, I laid a five dollar bill on the table and left.
I climbed onto my bike and peddled towards my house. Sadly, I had to pass the Belikov Farm. I just prayed that they weren't outside. I couldn't face Dimitri or any of his family after today and especially not with the tears that were falling from my eyes and down my face, landing softly onto that new dress.
Out of all of the places in this little town
Yeah, you had to come walking in here and sit down
