Dylan sat in the pub downing glass after glass of whiskey, he wasn't even feeling a hint of the guilt he thought he might have done for hitting the bottle again. All he cared about was forgetting the events of the day. It was too early for any of his colleagues to come through the door and so was happy and relaxed in the knowledge he could drown his sorrows in peace.

Dylan nodded to the bar man for another drink.

"Sorry mate, you've had enough." The barman told him.

"Isn't that my decision?" Dylan slurred angrily.

"Afraid not, I can't serve you anymore. Finish up and go home." He told him.

Dylan just rolled his eyes and downed the remainder of his whiskey before clumsily standing up off the stool and staggering outside. He didn't remember alcohol having this kind of effect on him so quickly but figured his tolerance will have changed after being sober for so long.

He ran his hand along the wall as he walked to keep himself upright. It wasn't until he came to the side of the pub where he let go and began to stumble unsteady on his feet again. Trying to concentrate and failing miserably Dylan tripped and fell the back of his head bouncing off the floor with a crack and rendering him unconscious.

"We have a shout. Around the corner, hope and anchor." Iain spoke heading into Jan's office.

"Alright just grab a trolley and we can run round with the medi bag." She told him jumping up from her chair.

Arriving at the pub they were pointed in the direction of the ally at the side where Dylan was lying still unconscious.

"Do you know how long he has been here?" Jan asked the barman and Iain started assessing him.

"I told him to leave about 3 hours ago, he left no problem really. Found him when I went on my break just now." He explained.

"Alright." She nodded at him. "Dylan? Dylan can you hear me?"

Dylan just groaned moving his head slightly.

"Keep nice and still for me, we're going to get you collar and boarded." She told him holding his head as Iain brought the equipment.

"Strong smell of alcohol here Jan." Iain told her.

"Yeah, I know." She sighed as they got him on the board then onto the trolley.

"Taking you to the ED now Dylan, we will be a subtle as possible." Iain told him as they wheeled him across the car park.

On arrival to the department Iain waved over Connie who came quickly frowning when she recognised who they had brought it.

"High dependency cubicle is free, get him in there." She told them and glanced around to see who she could get to assist.

"Nurse Hyde, with me please." She called over to the nurses station.

David looked up and rushed over to help as they headed into the HDC.

"Ok so Dylan Keogh, 43, found at the side of the pub. He has a laceration to the back of his head. Collar and boarded for precaution. BP low but stable at 90 systolic, tachycardic at 120 and temperature and 34. Bar man said he must have been there around 3 hours, smells strongly of alcohol. He has responded very slightly to voice but hasn't regained full consciousness whilst we've been with him." Jan reeled off.

"Okay thank you both. We will keep this as confidential as possible yes?" She looked at David who nodded his head.

"We need a line in, bloods taken and then push some warm fluids and get the bear hugger on him. Once he has warmed up a bit we can get him to scan and clear his head and neck." She told him.

David nodded again and set to work.

An hour later and Dylan had returned from his scans and was beginning to regain consciousness.

"Dylan? Dr Keogh? It's Mrs Beauchamp, you're in the ED. Do you remember what happened?" Connie spoke standing over him.

Dylan frowned. "She lost the baby." He muttered.

Connie looked puzzled and looked to David for a clue.

"Its a long story." David told her. "He's had a very difficult few days."

"Ok well let's keep pushing those fluids as fast as we can for now until he wakes up a bit more." She told him. "Shout if you need anything."

David nodded before he turned his attention back to his friend.

"What have you done Dylan. You were doing do well." He sighed.

Dylan opened his eyes slightly and looked at him frowning.

"My head..." he mumbled.

"You had a fall outside the pub." David told him. "You've been drinking too."

"I had to." Dylan told him. "I couldn't... couldn't stop. It was... difficult. I..I didn't know what else to do."

"Okay, okay. Just calm down." David spoke putting his hand on Dylan's shoulder not wanting him to get worked up.

"I feel sick." Dylan told him swallowing hard.

David rushed to the door and caught Louise's eye.

"Louise can I have a hand please. Quickly." He called to her and she rushed over.

"Is that Dylan?" She asked confused.

"Yes, I need a hand to roll him quickly before he aspirates." David told her as he grabbed the suction whilst turning Dylan onto his side with the help of Louise just as Dylan began to vomit.

David helped him out slightly with the suction as Dylan was weak. Once done they rolled him back into his back gently.

"Get me off this board." Dylan muttered.

"Just wait for you're scans. Won't be long now." David told him.

"What happened? Is he drunk?" Louise asked.

"I am an alcoholic. What do you think?" Dylan answered her.

"Right Dr Keogh, you're head and neck CT is clear. We can get you a bit more comfortable now." Connie spoke as she walked into the cubicle and smiled at David who barn to unscramble Dylan.

"Are you feeling any better?" She asked him.

"I'm fine. Just let me go home." He told her.

"I am keeping you in for observation for a few more hours and then we can see about getting you home, but you won't be allowed home on your own. Anyone we can get for you?" She asked.

"No one." He whispered slightly.

"He can stay with me until he is feeling himself again." David offered.

"That alright Dylan?" Connie asked.

Dylan shrugged then nodded figuring it was that or stay in the hospital.

"Just a few hours of observation then. I will sign you off sick for the rest of the week then we will talk." She added.

Dylan just nodded again and closed his eyes.

"I will see to dervla and bring you some things later." Louise told him putting her hand on his arm. "What's going on Dylan?"

He shook his head as he put his face in his hands.

"David?" She asked and the older nurse shrugged.

"Can I tell her?" He asked Dylan who gave a small nod not looking up from his hands.

"Ciara, a woman he got friendly with from his AA meetings. They had a bit of a thing, she was married. Fell pregnant with Dylan's baby, it was ectopic. They obviously lost it." David told her briefly.

"Oh Dylan." Louise sighed and rubbed his arm and she his shoulders shaking and David explained.

"She...she cared. I ruined it..." He spoken between ragged breaths.

"I don't think any of this is your fault." David told him.

"We should go finish up before the end of shift." Louise told him. "Give you a minute to yourself." She could see he was struggling and wouldn't let go when he had an audience, Dylan was very proud in that sense.

David nodded in agreement and the two of them left Dylan to himself.

Dylan could do nothing but cry, for Ciara, for the baby, for Sam, for Glen, for Cal, for his OCD, for his alcoholism. He had been bottling it up, he never cried, ever. The more he let go the more he got worked up until the machines started beeping getting the attention of the two nurses and Connie who rushed back in to see Dylan in hysterics grabbing onto the side rails of the trolley.

"Alright, resps high and heart rate 140." David spoke looking at the monitor.

"Dylan you need to calm down, you're hyperventilating." Connie told him. "Get 5 lorazepam."

David done as he was told as Louise took hold of Dylan's hands off the side rails and looked straight at him.

"Ok Dylan, deep breaths." She told him. "Slowly in and out. You're fine, you know you're fine. We will fix this."

Dylan slowed his breathing and shook his head as he felt David flush something through his cannula.

"Alright." She squeezed his hands. "Try to relax now. We won't be leaving you in your own again."

"He needs an appointment made with Ben for as soon as possible. Can one of you sort that? Then take him home. Plenty of fluids." Connie told them to which they nodded.

"We will sort this alright? This is just a bump in the road." David the doctor as he calmed back down to normal.

"I really hope so." Dylan sighed closing his eyes.