Hey all! :D So, this whole thing is basically just a collection of J/C one shots...each chapter is a new story and has absolutely nothing to do with other chapters. Basically I'm annoyed with how Voyager turned out and have turned to writing in order to get it right :D
This first fic is basically Post "Full Circle". Enjoy :D
~Cissa
Chakotay sat on the couch in his living room, sipping coffee and looking out his window. The rain smiting the window panes like bullets during a war matched his mood perfectly. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed, showing Chakotay that the Gods shared in his grief and despair.
"It's been ten years," he thought to himself, "ten long years since I last held her in my arms." He missed her desperately…didn't know how he was ever going to get over her. It'd been ten years and the pain had finally started to subside somewhat, but it was worse today - the tenth anniversary of Kathryn's death.
When he had first met Kathryn he fell in love instantly. She was beautiful, to be sure, with soft auburn hair and alluring green eyes. Still, that wasn't what attracted him to her. Her strength, compassion, wisdom, and wit were the defining features of Kathryn in his mind. He missed her so much it hurt inside! And to know it had almost been, but never was…that was the worst of all.
Kathryn had turned him down the first time on New Earth, saying it was inappropriate for a Captain and First Officer to be romantically involved, and he knew she was right. So, for the seven years in the Delta Quadrant he was content to be her advisor, her officer, and her friend. They shared meals together, talked with one another, and had come to know each other better than they knew themselves. Chakotay tried to move on - had some dalliances with other women - but still, he was always in love with Kathryn. When they finally returned to earth Kathryn was made an Admiral and Chakotay Captain of Voyager. They were no longer officially working together, and still Chakotay did nothing. After being shut down the first time he waited for her to make the first move. This had proven to be a huge mistake…one Chakotay had regretted for the last ten years.
Again he tried to forget her, and not seeing her everyday helped somewhat. Still, she was always lingering in his thoughts. Then she came aboard Voyager for a mission and they were together as much as before, just renewing the feelings he felt for her and hers for him as well. About a year after their return she had come to visit him while he was on duty and everything came pouring out. Then she said those beautiful words… "I never said never." While he was waiting for her to make the first move, she had been waiting for him, for the perfect moment when it would become clear to both of them what to do. She made him a deal: in ten months when he returned from his mission they would meet in Venice and they would begin their journey together; and they sealed that deal with a kiss. From that moment on he had been a giddy school boy; finally he had Kathryn and he was never going to let her go again. He left on his mission and returned ten months later, beaming over to Venice as soon as he could. He waited…and waited…and waited. Seconds became minutes and minutes turned into hours. Finally, Mark had shown up and changed his life forever; "She's dead," he had replied to Chakotay's pointed inquiries.
Now, ten years later, he still missed her, still felt the pain at her loss at the hands of the Borg. Now the Borg were destroyed he had had his revenge, but he didn't have Kathryn back…and she was all he'd ever wanted. He thought that destroying the Borg would bring him some semblance of peace, but he was wrong. She was still gone, and she was never coming back to him.
Suddenly, out of the darkness a sing-song voice chimed: Never say never my dear Commander. The voice seemed vaguely familiar, but Chakotay couldn't quite place it. Whirling around he was startled to see an orb of bright white light, small at first but slowly growing bigger and brighter, finally exploding in a burst so bright Chakotay had to cover his eyes to keep from being blinded. When the light cleared Chakotay couldn't believe what he was seeing…Kathryn was standing there in front of him in her lavender bathrobe, her long auburn hair cascading down her back. She was smiling her biggest smile for him, tears glistening in her bright eyes.
After several seconds where he just stood there and stared at her, she took a tentative step forward. "Chakotay…" she said hesitantly. Hearing her say his name was all he needed; tears flowing down his cheeks he ran to her, scooping her into his arms as he kissed her for the first time in over ten years. She returned his kiss with equal enthusiasm and they didn't break apart for several minutes.
When they finally did, he still held her close afraid that she would disappear if he let her go. She rested her head on his chest as he buried his face in her hair, drinking in her scent of spices that he missed so much. "This can't possibly be happening," he whispered, "I must be dreaming."
She looked up at him and cupped his face in her hands, "You're not dreaming. I'm here with you and I'm never going to leave again."
"But…how?" he asked, "You're…dead…"
"Not quite..." she replied with a little smile, "Can we sit down? Then I can explain." He took her hand and led her to the sofa, drawing her to his side as they sat down.
"Well, where to begin…"
"How about in the Borg Cube?" he prompted.
"Okay…well, I went to explore this inactive Borg Cube in order to prove to the Admiralty that there was no need to send Voyager back into the Delta Quadrant. Suddenly the drones activated and assimilated me, effectively turning me into their new Queen." At the recollection Kathryn shuddered and curled up closer to Chakotay, "It was horrible. I was still me…I had my own thoughts and feelings. However, the collective mind dominated and ruled everything I said or did. I had the horror of watching people die on my orders. When Seven and Star Fleet effectively destroyed the cube it was a release from the prison I had been held captive in for weeks." Several moments of silence passed as Kathryn again tried to collect her thoughts. Then she continued, "When the cube was destroyed I remember complete and utter darkness then, all of a sudden, a bright light. Suddenly before me stood a beautiful woman all dressed in a white robe. 'I am Lady Q' she told me. 'We have been watching you Kathryn Janeway, and we are very interested. You have a unique opportunity before you my dear,' she had continued, 'You will become one of us…an immortal, omnipotent Q. You will be my personal companion and will live in the continuum forever.' After several minutes of stunned silence I replied, 'I thank you for the honor, Lady Q, but I must politely decline. I have an appointment to keep on earth and someone very special waiting for me. If you would be so kind as to transport me there, I would be forever grateful.' 'I'm afraid, Kathryn, that you have no say in the matter,' she replied, and then we vanished, only to appear in the continuum. From that day on I was as she said, a Q who was her personal companion. I had all power, except to leave the continuum. That was stripped from me the day I used it to come back to earth and see you…"
"You came back…to see me?" he asked, stunned by everything she had told him.
"Yes. Do you remember that day you were walking on the beach and you heard my voice? You turned around and saw me standing a ways down the beach from you and you began running, only to have me disappear seconds later?"
How could he have forgotten? It had been mere weeks after her death. He had been filled with elation, only to have it dashed moments later as she disappeared in a burst of light. "Of course," he replied, "You don't mean…"
She simply nodded, "Yes, I was really there." Another bit of silence passed as Chakotay processed this new piece of information before Kathryn continued, "After that I wasn't allowed out anymore. I had abused my power and it was taken from me. In this way ten years passed. I never stopped trying to escape, never stopped keeping watch over you and making sure you were okay. I never stopped loving you…" she finished, tilting her chin up and kissing him lightly.
"After that time passed, Lady Q called me into her room one day. Next to her stood a very familiar figure…the Q we met on Voyager all those years ago. 'Mon Captain' he greeted me, kissing my hand, 'It's been too long.' 'What do you want Q? Why have you brought me here?' I asked him. 'My dear, sweet Kathryn' he crooned 'I simply wanted to test you and your dear Commander.' 'Test us?' I replied, obviously confused. 'But of course! I had to see whether you two really deserved each other, whether you would remain faithful over the course of time. You see, we tested you with the delights of the continuum - the power, the immortality – but you still held onto him. He has spent these last ten years believing you were dead, yet his heart still belongs to you and only you' he said with obvious joy. 'I'm afraid I still don't quite follow," I replied. 'My dear Kathryn, don't you see! You've passed the test! Now go home and be with your beloved!' And with that he snapped his fingers and I disappeared, only to find myself here." With that Kathryn finished, letting out a sigh of relief at the end of her tale.
"So you're saying, this was all a test set up by that Q?" Chakotay asked, after several moments of processing her information.
"Yes."
"And we passed?"
"With flying colors," she replied with a smile.
"So then, you're here…to stay?"
"As long as you want me." Elation filled his heart as Chakotay drew here to him again and kissed her deeply and intensely. He couldn't believe she was back, alive and well, and that she was finally his!
"I still can't help feeling that this is all a dream," he said when they broke apart minutes later.
"Believe it," she replied with an arch look, "I'm no dream."
Smiling at her he kissed her again. Suddenly his body tensed and his eyes narrowed, "Where is that Q? Keeping me away from you for all these years! Why I…" Kathryn silenced him by putting a finger to his lips.
"Don't worry. I told him exactly what I thought about his little test," she said with a smile.
"I'm sure you did," Chakotay chuckled, drawing her even closer to him.
"I've missed you so much Kathryn! Don't you ever leave me again!"
"I don't plan on it. I love you Chakotay, and I always will."
After several minutes of blissful silence Chakotay suddenly had an idea. "Marry me," he said, looking down into her green eyes.
"What?" she said, surprised by the suddenness of the proposal.
"I've had to spend the last ten years without you Kathryn and they nearly killed me! I never want to have to go through that again. Please say you'll marry me!"
"Yes!" she said, her eyes shining, "Of course I will!"
Smiling her kissed her again. "I'm sorry I don't have a ring for you."
"That's okay," she replied, "You are the only thing I want. I love you Chakotay."
"And I love you Kathryn Janeway."
