"Mentalward Contest"
Pen Name: Annabel Lee13
Title: Something Beautiful
Summary: I opened my eyes and looked at Bella with a big smile that frightened her. "When you find something beautiful, something that takes your breath away, what would you do to make it yours? How far would you be willing to go to keep it with you forever, no matter what?"
Word Count: 14.643
Edward POV
I turned on the lamp above her head, which caused her to shut her eyes immediately, only to open them after a brief second and try to recognize the place; find something familiar. I saw her eyes roaming around the place-my basement-finding nothing that would help her in any way escape.
I had already put a handkerchief on her pretty little mouth so she wouldn't scream. I'd hate if my father found out about that little incident.
I turned my back and went towards the table pretending to do something but actually looking at her big brown eyes through a hidden mirror. I had organized well this place. All this time of loneliness, of isolation, of that sick game of hide and seek from myself – from my true me- I had found this little place to breath.
My father of course was unaware of how I spent my time alone, but he hoped I did something good. Fool! He of all people should have known that once you accept and embrace who you were, there's no turning back.
"I'm sorry if you're not comfortable" I said to the girl in the chair, "but that's all I have".
I looked closely at her. She was indeed beautiful. Big brown well shaped eyes, white skin, scarlet red chicks, and from what I remember, pinky fully lips. Her hair fell in curls around her face. I brought my eyes on hers one more time.
Eyes wide open, terror, fear and panic draw in them, giving her little frame an exquisite beauty I had missed for so long. I noticed some tears slowly coming out of her eyes. How did she know? I loved it when they cried. All these intense feelings I was experiencing being birth before me, made my adrenaline reach a higher level.
A smile escaped my lips, and looked at her almost in love. I walked to her and she jerked her tiny frame to the back of her chair. Beautiful.
I stopped before her and kissed gently her chic. "Thank you" I whispered in her ear, and stroked her hair.
Fucking perfect.
I turned around, satisfaction and pleasure overwhelmed me.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
…three days before…
I escaped. I tasted the air of a free man, at last. After all those years, I saw the outside of my big house. Carlisle, my father, had managed to keep me imprisoned for so long quite successfully.
But now it was my turn. I took a deep breath and let the outside air fill my lungs. I smiled proudly at myself and began to find my life again, after all this time.
~0~
Two parks, five café's, three supermarkets, but I found what I wanted in a library. The last place I would usually check.
But there she was, looking through books, a tiny frame in the middle of a huge hall. I stood and admired. She was perfect.
Small hands, tiny waist, clumsy legs, hair covering her face, anxiety screaming from miles. Jack pot!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Don't be afraid little girl…" I hummed behind my back at her. A glimpse through the mirror told me she was petrified and the tears running down her chicks, that she was praying silently for her savior.
I exhaled loudly. Always the same fucking conversation….
I walked to her and she started sobbing loudly. I leaned near her fragile face and whispered crystal clear every word "Pray won't do you any good, because you will get out of here in only one way; and that would be dead. And only when I'll decide. So…" I took with my finger some tears and looked deeply in her eyes, "sit back and enjoy the ride!" I said cheerfully.
With a sudden move I was away from her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Hallo…" I approached the fragile girl and whispered near her ear. As I expected she jumped and I caught her so she wouldn't fall.
I had her in my lap and looked deeply in her eyes….there it was; the fear I was looking for. I smiled a wide smile and released her from my arms.
"I'm sorry…" she said fixing her clothes.
I smiled some more "I think I should be the one apologizing. I am really sorry I scared you. It wasn't in my intentions."
She smiled back. Yes, I still had it! The look they all melted for. "No, it's OK… I was a bit elsewhere and didn't see you".
I laughed a bit, and she blushed. At that instant I saw before me her blood… Deep red, pulsing behind her cheeks, running through her veins, her heart… I didn't just want her anymore; I needed her.
As if I woken from a dream, I gave her my hand for a handshake "I'm Edward". She took my hand and I was lost in the sensation of her blood pumping under my bare flesh.
"Bella" she simply said and blushed scarlet red; as if it could happen for her to be redder that she already was.
I smiled once again. "Nice to meet you Bella." And released her hand. "Could I ask for a favor?" I pleaded with my voice.
"What would you like?" she offered herself politely.
"Well," I said grabbing the back of my neck looking her from an angle "I would like some help to find some books in here. Today is my first time and I don't know the sections too well…if you wouldn't mind of course…." I looked her under my lashes. That always worked.
"Sure" she said with a smile. "What are you trying to find?" Oh, I already found what I was looking for my sweet little fragile girl; I thought and smiled at myself.
"Well…I'd like to find some books on medicine. I'm studying to become a doctor…" that thing acting shy always worked. Old, but good.
"Really? That's very nice!" she said looking very pleased. "Follow me" she continued and turned her back to me.
I was immediately behind her heals. "Are you studying anything?" I whispered in her ear. She jumped again, and half laughed. "I'm sorry…"
"No, it's OK, I'm a bit out of my water today… Um," she continued walking, "yes, I'm actually studying literature, and also work here-well part time" she said and saw her smile.
"Wow, I'm impressed! Studying and working! You're my idol."
"Oh well, it's not as difficult as it sounds…" she said half blowing half stroking her hair. She did the fucking move. Blown hair on my face… I still rule!
"I'm in no position to say, because I haven't actually tried it…"
"I like books, and working here gives me access to a lot more books for my thesis, so I kind of need it. Am I making any sense at all?" she said stopping and biting her lip.
"Actually, you are making perfect sense" I said smiling and staring shamelessly at those lips, thinking that if she bit a little bit harder, I might be rewarded with the sight of her blood.
"So, here we are" she said showing me the medicine section with a node. I was still staring at her lips. But I had to talk to her, so I stopped.
"Thank you Bella, you're really helpful." I said with a smile.
"It's nothing really." She smiled back."If you need anything, you can ask me, OK?"
"Yes, thank you again"
"Don't mention it" she said and was gone.
I then pretended to searching for books, while my mind was stuck at the sight of Bella biting her lip. It was excruciating; seeing it, and not being able to touch it. I took some books and sat at a table. I still had time since Carlisle came home from the hospital. I pretended for about an hour that I was taking notes. I had no idea what I was writing, because inside me I was dying to touch that creature and make it mine forever. My insides were hurting, my fists were clenched, and my eyes were fixed in her every move when she passed before me. I was captivated by my prey, and wasn't going to let it go, until it was utterly mine.
I stopped moving my hand to see what my fingers had been scratching on paper all this time. Big letters, small letters, letters written with skill, scribbles, all kinds of figures and patterns; they all formed one name. A name that it would most likely haunt me from now on. Hers. On a label on her chest it was written with her own handwriting. Isabella.
After an hour I decided it was time to go. I left the books back and went to say goodbye.
"Hey…" I said and again she jumped surprised. I didn't catch her this time. She didn't need me to, and if I did, I might have done it right there in the middle of the library. "Sorry…"
She laughed breathlessly. "It's OK" she said.
"I'm going to go now…It was really nice to meet you."
"It was nice to meet you too Edward"
"Listen um…tomorrow; will you be here tomorrow as well?"
"Yes, all week long 2-9 in the afternoon." She said smiling. Too much information, so that was good.
"I'll see you tomorrow then" I said.
"See you tomorrow Edward. Goodbye" she said and got lost in the library halls.
On the way home, I couldn't keep my mind of her and the sound of my name coming from her lips. I smiled at myself at the thought of her screaming my name in agony and begging me for her life.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
«Right now, I'm going to remove the handkerchief from your mouth alright?" I asked her looking right into her eyes. "I don't want you to make any noise at all, or this ends badly, are we clear?" I continued, searching for an answer in those deep chocolate brown eyes. At that moment I imagined little drops of blood spread around those eyes. What a beautiful sight! I smiled and said "Blink if you understood what I just said".
She continued looking right into my eyes, looking for mercy perhaps? Sorry girl that one ended a long time ago. But after a few moments in which she calmed her breathing, a saw her eyes slowly closing and opening.
How much more beautiful she was when fear was dressing her expressions, she would never know. But I would. I wish I didn't have to do it now. It would be such a same. Such a beauty being killed once… I mentally shock my head. She should have a secret power to bring her life back from the dead, so I could do that over and over again.
I took a strand of hair in my hand and caressed it. Such a same, I thought again. Slowly I brought my hands behind her neck and unfolded the handkerchief. I brought it before me and waited.
She was silent, looking at my hands. I took the handkerchief and put it in my back pocket. She was looking down. With my thumb I lifted her chin and brought her face close to mine. I exhaled my breathing with a smile on her chick.
"You are very beautiful…you know that?" I said without breaking her gaze. I saw her eyes filling with tears. She tried to fight them back, unsuccessfully. Hot tears were now running down her little face and I wiped them with my finger. Touching her white porcelain face was a breathtaking feeling I hadn't felt for so long. It was so intense that I closed my eyes and exhaled deeply.
When I opened them she was staring intensely at me, many emotions and thoughts going through her eyes.
With a sudden move I lifted my body and she jerked back at the chair protect less, since I've tied her hands behind her back; her legs as well. I moved to the table across the chair and looked what I had in front of me. Scissors, knifes, chisels, small pieces of cloth, rope covered with plastic, and gloves. Usually I wasn't using them all; I just wanted to put in their precious little minds the feeling of fear and make it stay there till the end.
"You're lucky it's me and no one else…" I said to her behind my back while opening the drawer to have a look and see if my other secrets were there as well "because, not to take pride in it" I said with a satisfactory smile "I'm a bit of an old-fashioned at this…". I closed the drawer and turned around to face her.
She was looking scared and confused. "Not to take pride in?" she said with a husky voice, and cleared her throat.
I left a small laugh escape my lips. "My sweet angel, if anyone else found you before me, then you would be already dead." I said lifting my eyebrows, with a serious tone. She had to understand that; that I was being good with her. I heard the tightening in her throat and saw her eyes growing wide with dread. It was like she was made for me.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Hallo again" I said to her as I approached the stand she was behind.
"Oh, hallo Edward. It's nice to see you again." She greeted me with a smile. "How have you been doing?"
"Well, I suppose…" I smiled. "But, I'd like your help again today if it's possible" I asked politely never breaking my smile.
She smiled back. "It would be my pleasure" she said, and as soon as the words left her mouth, I spotted a light red color spreading on her white chicks. She was blushing! She turned her head away from me, like she was searching to find something and I thought I heard her murmuring something under her breath I didn't quiet catch.
"Is everything OK?" I asked and leaned closer to her, above the stand. She turned her head and my face was so close to hers, I could sense her breath on my skin. I inhaled deeply. Then pulled myself back.
She was still looking at me eyes wide in shock; in a good way apparently. I turned my body towards the other direction. "Should we…?" I asked waiting for her.
She blinked. "Yes, you're right" she answered and with quick steps came close to me and showed me the way.
I followed her and like yesterday I pretended to take notes. I cracked in about an hour. I was too slow, but that was because I've been out of the game almost two years. I growled to the thought. Packed quickly the books and went to the stand, where she was sitting and reading a book. How I would love to see that little body tied up in my chair…
"Are you done so soon?" she asked me when I placed the books on the desk before her.
"Yes, I'm too tired to concentrate anymore, so I give up" I half smiled. "But I have another favor to ask." I said leaning closer to her once more. I felt her breathing increasing and was pleased that my charms could still do the job successfully.
"I'd like you to come with me for a walk. If that's possible".
She looked confused. Why? "I just wanted to buy you an ice cream if you want…That's all".
"I don't know… I don't think I'm allowed to leave just yet…" she trailed off thinking.
Well, this was it. I couldn't do it another hour, because Carlisle would be home for that stupid session and if I wasn't there, then the whole thing was going to be a huge failure.
"Can't you steal a few minutes for me? I promise not to go far, if you have to be back soon…." Oh come on, what else I have to say to make you follow me…
"I don't know….I'm not sure…." She was thinking about it. Still thinking.
"Why don't you tell someone to cover you for a few moments? Would that be easy?" I looked like I was fucking pleading! Which I was, but never that obvious. But that girl had something I didn't want to miss for the world!
"Well, if you put it that way…"she said and turned her head looking for something.
"Wait a minute, I'll be right back" she said and left almost running.
I was left there waiting, letting my mind getting lost in thoughts of her tied up, screaming, panting, her smell all over me, her blood-
"Ok, ready to go!" she came quickly wearing her jacket."But only for fifteen minutes. I can't stay longer".
"Fifteen minutes are great" I said offering her my hand and leading her outside of the library.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Now, what I'd like you to do for me is to follow my exact instructions, so nothing will happen to you, alright?"
"Why are you doing this?" she said slowly breaking down and letting tears wash her porcelain face.
"Seriously, this?" I asked in disbelief.
"What do you mean?"
I exhaled. "Everyone asks the same damn question! Why are you doing this? Or…" I said roaming in the dark room "please let me go… don't hurt me, I'll do what you want, and other bullshit like that." I said and stopped before her. "For your information, I'm doing this because that's me. That's who I am. End of story".
I kneeled and looked into her eyes, terror draw in them, giving me slowly back my self-esteem. I smiled. "That's my girl" I whispered to her kissed her chick. So soft… I almost whispered.
I got up and did a little walk around the room. "Do you remember when we went for a walk? How happy you were, and carefree…" I stopped. "You captivated me with a smile. The best smile I've ever seen in such a long time".
"Please…stop…" she whispered.
I started walking again. "Bella, Bella, Bella…", name and step, "when will you put it in your pretty little brain? This is the last day of your life. Enjoy as much as you can of it."
She started crying now. I could hear her sobs. "Edward…if you…"sob "let me" sob "go…" relaxed a bit "I won't tell" sob "anything to anyone." sob "I swear" deep breath.
"My little Bella, you are so naïve…you don't know anything about me. " I walked to the other side of the room, grabbed a chair and placed it opposite her; took my seat and admired what I had before me.
The most beautiful creature I had laid eyes upon, in a very long time. Her delicate features light by the dim light, making her look like a dream. Tears running down her face, made her chicks glow in the darkness. But the most exquisite piece about her was her eyes. From the first moment I laid my eyes upon her, that feeling of constant tremor, fear, disorientation, loneliness perhaps, but definitely that feeling of being misplaced in the world hit me like a brick of stones.
I removed some hair from her wet forehead still admiring her other-worldly beauty.
"So Bella tell me," I asked taking away my hand "where were you born?"
She furrowed her eyebrows and took a breath. But didn't answer.
I exhaled. "I'm still waiting"
Still, nothing. "Look Bella" I said getting up and moving to my table. I took the green plastic rope and in my hands, and returned to my seat. As soon as I flashed the object to her, her eyes grow more and looked directly at me. "This is going to be easier if you answer my questions" I said with a smile.
Her eyes were fixed on my fingers, and the object I had between them. Slowly she opened her little mouth and whispered "Forks".
"Oh, so you're a small town girl! Well, what a small world. I am a small town boy as well. I think we have more in common things than I already thought. And what is a small town girl like you, doing on a big city like this?"
She was petrified. She wanted to leave this place so badly, I could see in her expression she was roaming the room for an exit.
"You won't find one…." I said looking at her, causing her to look back at me.
"You won't find one" I repeated "because there in none."
"What?" she asked confused.
"There is no exit. I didn't make one. There is only an entry to the room, which you will never find, I guarantee that."
"What makes you so sure?" she replied with a whisper.
"Hmm….my sweet little girl, no one ever has." I smiled. "Plus, there is a combination which you don't know. So you'll probably be trapped in here for the rest of your life. Which won't be that long." I have considered every possible aspect of any victim running away, but there was none. I was so proud of myself at this moment.
She let out a sob. "I'm still waiting" I reminded her.
"For what?"
"An answer." I said calmly.
"Why the hell would you want to know what I'm doing here?" she was a bit pissed off. I liked it!
"It's all part of the game" I said excitingly.
"Well you can take your little game, go behind that door and shove it up your ass!" she was furious. I didn't like that. This wasn't supposed to go like this.
I got up from the chair so quickly, I threw it on the floor with a loud noise which caused her to flex her tiny frame. I went to the desk, grabbed a knife and with the same movements, placed it under her chin.
"You listen to me, little girl" I said pressing it in her flesh, causing her pain "if you continue with that attitude and language, the end will come sooner than you think." I pressed some more, and felt her vein pumping under my touch. "Am I making myself clear?"
She cried. "Yes…I'm sorry" she said through her sobs.
I removed the knife and put it in my other back pocket. "That's my girl".
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"So Bella…" I began, after I bought her an ice cream like I promised "you said you are working in the library…"
"That's right" she said after she licked lustily her ice cream. I never understood what people found so erotic about a girl licking an ice cream. It was just food, which happened to be eaten in a different way. It made you look like a moron because only babies eat that way, and almost all of the time you end up with a stain. But if Bella like it, that suited me.
"And may I ask what your thesis is about?" I said while we continued our walk through the park across the library.
"You may ask" she simply said licking once more her vanilla ice cream and looking at me.
She was an easy one. "So, what is your thesis about?"
She wiped her mouth and said "Well, it's about Romeo & Juliet" with a shy smile.
The next ten minutes were spent with her talking about her thesis; how much work she had done, how much she still needed to be done, what she liked about working in a library, and answered some of my questions about herself. All in all, Bella was a simple girl, who enjoyed the small things in life.
But the thing that captured my attention was that she didn't say much about her family. Hm, maybe she was a lost soul. Maybe she wasn't. I'd figure it out when the time was right.
I walked Bella back to the library and said my goodbye with a light kiss and stroke on her chick. The last one made her nerves go all frenzy, something I felt under my palm.
After a few moments, of deep thought with myself, I decided tonight was the night. It was the perfect chance, and I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Tonight, Bella was going to be mine.
~0~
I had it all set up. I spent my afternoon preparing my basement and putting whatever I would need for tonight in a bag. Then I waited patiently for Bella to leave the library. I was hidden behind some trees in the park, and with the night on me side, there was not a chance in hell she would've seen me.
She put her headphones and started walking home. How convenient. Even if I didn't have loud steps, she still wouldn't have heard or notice me.
Stalking Bella was the easiest thing I have done. Thin tiny legs that tripped to a smooth surface, clumsy steps and tiny scared frame. I was in love with the woman.
As soon as she closed the door behind her, I continued walking. I wanted to give her time to take a bath and relax. If her nerves weren't tensed, this was going to be a lot easier.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I took my seat again across her and looked her in the eyes. Beautiful was a small word to describe what I had before me.
"And let's continue" I said cheerfully. I loved the part with the questions. But not as much as I loved the final part of the plan.
"In Forks, the place where you come from, did you like it there?"
She breathed. She still wasn't ready to answer and play along. I exhaled annoyingly. "I can't go through this every time I ask you a question. I am asking politely to answer. Trust me; you don't want to know what happened to people that didn't answer."
"What if I do?" she asked almost without a voice.
"In this case…" I said and got up "let me show you." I went to my desk and opened the drawer. I had three little boxes neatly put together. I grabbed them and went back to Bella.
I showed her the first box "This is from Nancy" I said, opened it and put it in front of her face. She jerked back in disgust. "She wasn't any corporative at all, so had to take off her nails. All ten of them. I learned from that mistake." I said to Bella and myself as well "Never remove everything from the begging. All the fun goes wasted."
Bella's face turned green with disgust. In that box I had all Nancy's nails, still with their drained blood. I had placed them in such order, that it looked like hands without flesh. Nails that that wanted to crawl their way out of the box and come up at you to save them.
"It was really a waste" I said as I closed the box and took in away from her. "Nancy has beautiful hands. Long and delicate…" I place the box on the chair behind me and opened the second one.
"This is Tanya, European tourist." I placed the box before her and she leaned closer because she couldn't see.
"It's empty" her big eyes staring on me.
"If you look closely, you'll see it's not. You see, Tanya had an extraordinary eye color and I hated to take it away. So I just took the eyelashes." I looked at Bella; she was trying to see something-no, see nothing, so she would stick to her idea. I brought the box under the light. "See…" I said pointing little hair with my finger, a bit over-exited "see those little dark hairs with a hint of red on the edge? That's it."
She looked closely and when she saw them she gasped loudly and jerked back to her seat wanting to go away.
"That little red is the blood. Of course I was really sad that her eyes bleed. I told you her eye color were other-worldly beautiful" I said with a sign.
With the same ritual I placed the box on the chair behind me and took the last box.
"This is Mary" I said showing the closed box to Bella. "She had the name and the beauty of Madonna herself." I recalled het at that moment. She and Bella had so many similarities in their expressions which made them look angelic and sacred. Creatures like them weren't easy to find. I guess I got lucky; twice. And I'm very proud of it. "I'm very proud I found her" I said out loud opening the little box.
With her, I tested myself. I had gone a little too far. I don't know if I could do it again. Probably not; because Mary was special and I treated her like the Madonna she was.
Bella was silent looking at the box and me. She didn't understand this time as well. "Mary was very special to me" I began "so I treated her with a special way. That little piece you see at the corner of the box" I said showing her with my finger "that is the left corner of Mary's heart."
Bella let a small scream escape her lips and left her mouth hanging open. Her chest was moving quickly and her eyes were crystal brown, as tears started to falling down from them, making her skin sparkle in the dim light. God, she was a true masterpiece.
I closed the box, picked up the others and went to place them back in the drawer while saying "Don't worry. I have no intention of taking your heart."
I took my seat again opposite her. She was still crying. "Hush now "I said "and let's continue our conversation. Because if I don't take your heart, I might as well find something else to take, if you continue with that attitude. So, back to the subject, how were your years in Forks Bella?"
She was still crying and sobbing. And silent. I started tapping my foot on the floor because I was irritated. I put my fingers on my chin, concentrating on her face. With what could I begin, I questioned myself while rubbing my chin. I suppose for a start I could pull her hair, or stick a cigarette in her nose-
"Fine" I thought I heard her say lightly; almost a whisper.
"Speak up Bella, I can't hear you."
"My time in Forks was fine." She said a little louder.
"Bravo, that's my girl!" I said clapping my hands satisfied. "But I'd like to know a bit more than just a simple fine".
She took a deep breath and began "My father's name is Charlie, my mom's Renee'. He's the Chief of Police, she is a ballet teacher. I grew up with them and my uncle Phil who leaved with us, because his wife left him."
I waited. "And? That's not obviously the end of the story".
"I…" she cleared her throat "I want to hear yours now."
I leaned and looked her closely, resting my hand on my chin. "What are you talking about?"
"Well, I figured, if I get to say my story, I want to hear yours as well. It's not like anyone is going to know it after."
"Why the hell, would you want to know my story?"
She shrugged her shoulders and looked at me. "It only seems fair… if I'm going to die, I still get a final wish, right?"
Damn, she had me there. I moved my hand to the side looking intensely at her. My eyes were burning into hers, trying to find an answer. Or a reason behind her request. A request I wasn't familiar with. What was going on in her mind now? What did she wanted to achieve by that?
"What would you like to know?"
She stayed silent again; skeptical. She wanted to choose the right questions for me. I had to say Bella had some balls in her. No other girl did that. They were all winy and crying, until I got what I wanted.
"Where are you from?" she suddenly whispered.
"I'm…" there's no point of lying, I thought and "I'm from Chicago actually" I replied.
She just moved her head in approval. Why wasn't she upset? I lied to her.
"Aren't you mad?" I asked her.
"Why would I be mad?"
"Because I lied to you. I said I was from a small town, but that's a lie. You know that right?" was something wrong with her? I don't remember giving her anything…
"Yeah I know. But I don't mind. Plus, you did a lot more worse things than just lying." She said and looked down. I could sense the shivers that travelled through her fragile body right now.
"Oh, yes you're right!" I said remembering the moment with a smile on my face.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It was almost midnight. I couldn't hear anything from Bella's apartment, so she must have slept. It was time to set up my equipment. Another novelty for Bella.
I took my newest creation out of the bag and hang it. Now, I only had to wait for the sunrise.
~0~
After a few walks in the park, a hot dog and reading a book, it was finally time. I went back to Bella's apartment and rang the bell. I had already gone through the main door of her building so I was right out of her door. I rang and rang and rang till I heard her walking sleepily and calling "yeah I heard ya, I'm coming". I was glad she went for the door at once without any hesitations.
I hid behind some stairs and waited for Bella to open the door and welcome her surprise. I saw the door knob turning and anticipation rushed through my blood at the thought of Bella fainting.
I looked closely as she slowly opened the door and picked, only to detect a red stain on her doormat. I followed her eyes which travelled upwards the door to find a pair of legs hanging lifeless before her.
The door opened violently with Bella screaming and putting a hand on her mouth. Right in front of her was a dead corpse hanging from her door. I placed the legs at the height of her waist, so she could see the face if she lifted her eyes. I had noticed every little detail to make it look real.
I made a wax doll some time ago, and didn't know how to use it. Well, I found a special occasion and now here it is. Fully clothed, with real blood dripping out of it, starting to make a small pool of blood under the legs, eyes wide open in horror and tongue hanging out of the mouth. Simple, but wonderful.
When Bella saw my doll's face, she mistaken it as a real human and as any normal person would do, after a shriek of horror she collapsed in front of her open door.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Well, let's just forget about that right now, and continue. What do you say?"
She exhaled deeply. "What else do you want to know?"
"Well, how about you tell me about your high school years." That's always an interesting topic.
"Um… I went to Forks High school, had three best friends, a cursed enemy and a crush that never came true. Then, I passed-"
"Wow wow wow Bella! Don't you think you're going a little too fast?"
She looked with questioning eyes. "I want to know more about that boy. What was his name?"
"I really don't want to answer to that kind of questions." She said annoyed.
"Well, if you don't you shouldn't have brought it up."
"I only brought it up, because sooner or later you were going to ask. I can see that's a mistake…"
I saw sadness in her, and immediately understood how broken she was about that matter. Excellent.
"Yes, it was a mistake. One you can't fix now, so you have to tell me."
"What if I don't tell you, because I don't want to!" I saw flames of furry in her eyes and liked it.
"Well, I suppose I could try some new techniques on you…" I said thinking. "Maybe I should start with that cigarette I had in mind..."
"A what?"
"A cigarette…" I replied calmly looking into her eyes. "I thought of beginning with your nose and then go to your mouth-your forehead perhaps…" said while looking at those particular areas with interest.
"Fine.", she said scared, and a little pissed of perhaps. "His name was…" she took a deep breath "his name was Peter. And I was in love with him. But it didn't work out. OK?"
"Hmmm, maybe. Maybe not. Why it didn't work out?"
"You really want to know every single little detail about that?"
"Yes, I would like actually. We have a lot of time ahead of us, so don't rush." I gave her some time to think.
"Well, I liked Peter since I can remember me. He was tall and handsome, with brown hair and eyes. Didn't like sports that much. He had something that captured me from the first time I saw him. Did you ever had that feeling?" she raised her head and looked my from her eyelashes.
"I think I do. I know what you mean. Carry on…"
"No, tell me. What was her name?"
What a stubborn little girl! "You're very stubborn, you know that? Finish up your story, and then I'll tell you mine. OK?"
"We have a deal then?" she asked slightly embarrassed.
Well well… the little girl has a mind and puts it to work! Who would have thought? "I suppose we have a deal. But first, it's your part of the story. I don't ask much, you just tell me. So, please carry on."
"OK." She exhaled. "Well, I did try to talk to Peter a couple of times. We had lunch in the school cafeteria. We did date for a couple of times, but we stopped." She stopped. I could see she was lost in her memories. Sad memories that made her eyes fill with tears. I didn't say anything, because all that sadness along with the tears was a breathtaking sight. I just stood there and admired.
After a while she calmed herself and continued. "Peter was my first. But didn't prove to be as good as he seemed to be. He was really rough and hard with me. And we only were together once. After that, he didn't want me anymore. And we weren't even a couple. He just…he just-" she exhaled with a sob. Wow, I was travelling elsewhere when she cut herself.
"I understand." I said. "Please, continue" I asked polite.
"Seriously?"
"Yes. You're not getting away from this Bella. Not so easily."
"You're a dick" she said under her breath.
I chuckled. "I think I'm a saint in comparison to your Peter over there." I said mocking her.
"You didn't know him, alright?! You can't have an opinion!" she was pissed now. And this time, it really suited her expressions.
"Well, if I am to form an opinion, please continue with your story." I was dying to know what went wrong.
"I can't understand what you find so amusing or interesting in this…" she exhaled.
"I'm finding a lot of things interesting that other people don't. And your story interests me, opposite to what you think. I won't ask again. The pack of smokes is just behind my back."
Her eyes grew more. Did she think I was kidding about that? Because if she did, I had to prove her wrong. With the next disagreement, I would.
"Um…Ok" she said disoriented. "Um… when I was about five, I had an accident. I was playing with a friend, and we were pretending to be-this sort of…couple. We were five."
"I understand."
"No, it's not what you think. We didn't-um…"
"Just tell me the story Bella".
"OK. We um, I was the wife and at some point I had to make lunch for him. So I put some water to boil, and…we had an accident." She stopped. I was looking in her eyes, and it was like seeing the story she was telling, being done before my own eyes. Bella's big eyes were so expressive in some sort of way. She was like an open book. I knew where to push her. She was telling me to, with her eyes. "I wasn't careful enough and I spill the hot water on me. Both of us, to be honest."
"In which areas?"
"On my chest and my friend's legs." She looked down, and heard her sniffing her nose. She was crying again, and soon saw the tears filling her white T-shirt.
I gave her some time to compose herself, as I was being captured by her reactions. She was absolutely gorgeous. The way her head was hung from her shoulders, her hair covering parts of her face, tears that were falling down like diamonds from her pearly eyes and sobs that heard as a sweet song in my ears. I didn't want to sign out loud and interrupt her.
When after a while she started composing herself, I looked into her eyes. Red, swollen and dark. "How bad were the injuries?" I asked with a smooth voice.
She swallowed loudly. "My friend's burn was second degree and mine as well. His parents were rich so he got a plastic surgery. But he didn't speak to me again. I lost him that day." She looked down again, disappointed by herself.
"You?"
"What about me?" she looked up at me.
"You said he did a plastic surgery. What about you? You didn't?"
"My parents weren't the wealthiest people in town. So, no. I chose not to. Didn't want to spent money like that." Bella let a heavy sign leave from her chest.
No selfish. Recognized her mistake, but thought herself was unimportant. God, I'm good!
"Let's go back to Peter. You said he wasn't as good as you expected. Why is that?"
"I think I told you enough already." She said between heavy breaths. "Now it's your turn."
"No. I don't think so." I said coldly.
"We made a deal." She said stubbornly.
"Yes, I am aware of that. But we're not done with you."
"I think we are. Unless you tell me something about you, I won't tell you anything else."
"Is this your final answer?" I said leaning closer to her, leaving my breath on her parted lips.
"Yes." She said scarily.
"Suit yourself!" I said getting up fast, causing her to gasp. I went to my desk, and got ready for the real fun to begin.
I took a chisel and in the dark started playing with it, causing little flash of lights to go to Bella's eyes.
"What is that?" she said, with tremor draw in her voice.
"We're going to play a little game. It will end when I say so. All you have to do is obey my every word. Or there will be consequences." I turned fast at her and looked right into her eyes, piercing her soul. She immediately jerked back at her seat and looked at me in horror. I loved that. It had to do with my eyes. Everyone looked at me with this way, when I had that wicked smile on my face.
I walked slowly to her. "This Bella" I said showing her the object I was holding "is called a chisel. In this game, you have to clean your nails with that object. If you succeed that, I'll answer to one question. You have no saying to this. You just obey. Now, I will untie your hands so you can do this, without my help."
I went to her, without giving her the chance to speak and bent in front of her. I looped the ties around her legs and untied her hands. She brought them in her lap, hugging and caressing them with both hands all the time looking down.
I lifted her face with my thumb and looked into those eyes. Terror was making them glow like the only stars in a dark sky. I put the chisel in her hands and said with a cool voice "Start". I took my seat opposite her and waited for her to begin.
Bella looked at her lap processing the object in her hands. Some seconds passed in complete silence. I could only hear Bella's steady breathing seeing her chest moving up and down in rhythm.
"Now Bella" I said suddenly causing her to jump on the chair. "I won't ask it again. That, or the cigarette. Your call."
"How the hell is this my call?" she screamed with tears coming out of her eyes.
"OK" I said getting up to reach the pack of smokes I had somewhere on the desk.
"OK OK" I heard Bella saying "I'll do it OK" she exhaled heavily. "Just give me some time…"
"There is no time Bella. I already gave you too much time. Now, or I'll light my cigarette and there's no turning back"
She took a deep breath. "Fine".
I took again my seat and watched as Bella brought the chisel on her first fingernail and started scraping it. "Ouch" she yelled and put her finger in her mouth to suck the blood.
I took her hand off her mouth. "If are going to do this, you'll do it right. No sucking blood. And all nails. No more warnings."
She was in pain, and I loved that. I left her hand fall on her lap. With tears in her eyes she was staring at the object before her. I had to give her a signal to go faster or else I would have to do it myself; not such a good idea.
I took a smoke from my pocket I had hidden, and light it. She looked at me eyes wide in shock, as I blew fume in front of her face. She coughed and I smiled through it. She left a short shriek of horror and got the message.
I saw her fingers moving the chisel to the next finger, scraping nail and skin, dark red blood escaping her porcelain flesh. What a wonderful sight and feeling. I took a drag as she moved to the next finger without looking at me. She wanted to do it fast. She was in pain, and afraid of her life. But she didn't want to mess it up either. I was holding the cause of that worry in between my fingers.
Like a good girl, Bella did her job properly in each finger of her left hand. When she moved to the right, of course it was more difficult to hold the chisel, so blood was running richer in her pale hand.
She started shaking and sobbing, not being able to be silent anymore, leaving small voices of pain and discomfort. But she didn't stop. Her full of blood hand was still holding the chisel, scraping the corners of each nail methodically; because she knew what was waiting for her if she disobeyed.
When she reached the final finger, you couldn't tell where the blood was coming from. Her hands were covered with it. Blood and tears, all mixed with a beautiful expression of pain.
But not quite enough.
"I'm sorry Bella" I said slowly and rose from my seat. Her head was down. She didn't bother to lift it and look at me. I took the cigarette I had in my fingers and placed it on her head between her hairs.
Another shriek of horror and pain broke the silence of the room. I was forcing the cigarette into her scalp and Bella's screams were feeding my weak soul. It was like I had seen the light of day and heard birds singing for the very first time. Everything felt so magical and alive as I was pushing the cigarette inside her head. A million feelings were rushing through my head as I was whispering 'yes' over and over again above Bella's burning head.
By the time I was finished with it, there was a small hole in the middle of her head from the burning. I took the smoke and threw it on the floor, stepping on it with my foot.
I took back my seat and looked at Bella. "I think you can ask me that question" I said. I was completely refreshed, that I tried really hard not to sing my words.
But Bella was standing there like a corpse. A lifeless statue. Blood was all over her hands and clothes. Her hands were slightly shaking from the after pain experience, the only thing showing that she was still alive. Head ducked in her lap, bloody hands and tremors that made her body look almost dead and so alive at the same time. I had created a new Aphrodite.
But my goddess wouldn't speak a word in that condition. I went to the desk and put some cold water from a bottle I kept for times like these in a piece of cloth; then placed it gently upon her wound. She screamed of pain once more, but after a few minutes she was enjoying the sensation it had against her hot skin.
"Are you ready to talk?" I asked and took my seat. I was dying to know what was going on in that brain of hers.
She shook her head as a 'yes' after some time. She was caressing her hands, trying to take away the blood that started running dry at some places. She whispered something through her teeth that sounded like a 'why'. "I'm sorry I didn't catch that" I said.
"Where did you grow up?" she said with a sour voice.
I sat back at my chair. "I spent my childhood in Chicago. It was very nice; we had a big house outside the city with a yard and a dog. But then my mother passed away so we moved here."
"What happened to your mum?" she said after a moment of silence.
"I believe I answered to your question. Now it's my turn; and I'm dying to know about Peter!"
"What do you want to know?" she said never looking up.
"What, he just did you and never called? Something must've happened…"
"Nothing happened." She said and left a sob. "It's as you said."
"Maybe. Or maybe not. I want to know and I'll find out." I lifted her head with my thumb and looked right into her eyes. I saw the poetry and the beauty of her pain, her sadness, her sorrow, her fear, and my eyes went white from joy. She jerked back with a scream. "One way or the other" I finished.
She was panting on the chair, hugging herself and her head. I must have scared her too much with my eyes. All I could hear coming out of her mouth was a 'oh my god'. Yeah, it must have been that.
"Don't be afraid" I said stroking her hair, causing her to shiver under my touch. "It's a very common thing. Now, tell me about Peter, already. I'm sure you don't want another cigarette on your scalp."
She looked up at me behind her lashes like a little puppy. "He saw the marks I had on me and…" she took a deep breath "and got scared. He thought I was crazy, that I was hurting myself, because… I don't know he thought I might have some sort a disease…" she trailed off hugging her hands.
"So, you gave him your rose, and he returned a thorn…what a douche!" I said to her. Maybe she would feel a little better. I needed her to feel better.
But there was no reaction at all; apart from the crying, that never seemed to stop. I waited a little bit for her to calm down. I even hugged her bloody hands. I must say, she did a good job, the cuts were quite deep.
After a while I got up and walked towards the wall. The light I had was enough for me to pull the chains out of the wall and prepare her for my next move soundless as always. I walked back to her and loosened her ties on her legs.
"Get up Bella" I ordered her.
She lifted her head in hope. God, how I hate that look; but not as much as I hate the next line "Are you letting me go?" she almost screamed it. Of course, they all had voice when they said something stupid as that, but for my questions… none was talking.
I exhaled. "Just get up Isabella!" I said slightly frustrated.
She put her hands on the side of the chair to support herself, but as I expected she failed, and I caught her fragile little body before she collapsed on the basement floor. I took her in my arms and led her to the other side of the wall.
"Thank you" she murmured in the crock of my neck exhaling quick air and holding tight my shirt.
"I don't know why you are thanking me Bella," I said at her ear "I'm not done with you".
She grabbed my shirt tighter and looked into my eyes with horror painted on her expression. She was looking for an answer; one that she wanted to hear. I had to disappoint her.
"I'm sorry I have to disappoint you" I said as I left her thin legs hit the concrete floor "but letting you go is not in my plans." I gave her a look that made her shiver and loose her balance; it was a good thing I was still holding her hands.
I took her hands, and tied then with the chains against the wall, while still holding her weight. First the left, then the right. I grabbed her waist and looked into her eyes. Red and swollen, but her diamonds tears were still making her chicks sparkle in the dim light. "Ok then" I said and left her body fell.
Her legs were numb for they've been tied up in a certain way for so long and now she couldn't hold herself still. A shriek of Bella's voice echoed in the room. Her dysfunctional legs, which couldn't hold her body straight, were half paralyzed, staying still, while her tied against the wall arms were trying to hold her frame up straight.
"I can't-I can't- I can't" was all that was coming out from Bella's mouth. She was obviously trying to move her legs up, but she was staying still; moving only her arms here and there like a dying fish out of the water.
I had tied her in such way, that when she was at a level like this, the chains would press her arms under her armpits and hurt her body, probably leaving bruises. In order to not to be in pain, she had to find a way to make her legs start feeling again, without obviously touching them to rub them and make her body stand up straight.
Right now it was a bit difficult to do that, so she was just feeling the room with endless screams and cries for help. I was feeding my soul and my whole reason for being with those screams, that I missed so much. I was standing before her, with my eyes closed, my body fixed to stare at her, my ears and senses wide open, and a satisfactory smile on my face.
I was standing before her, enjoying every minute of this sweet torture that was being performed in my sight leaving slow satisfactory moans and 'yeses' here and there, as Bella was desperately trying to pick up the pieces from herself and stand in her two feet like all humans. She was trying to support herself on the wall, but that was impossible, because of the way I had placed her, so she kept falling down, hurting herself even more.
"Please, please, just-"was all she could say every time she kept falling down like a little child. Very slowly she started to jerk her legs from time to time, leaving moans and cries. Her vision must have been blurry because of all those tears, and she couldn't see how with one simple move she could be standing in no time. But I didn't want to break her tries and end this beautiful sight just yet. It would be a shame.
I took my sit and continued watching her tries. She was so beautiful; screaming, hurting, bleeding. A wonder for my eyes. My heart was hurting from such pleasure and my weak soul was being fed from the beauty and the poetry of her pain and dread.
Suddenly she just left her hands standing lifeless at her sides; she was quitting. She couldn't take any more pain, so she was compromising with what she already had.
"I can't" she said between sobs and cries "I can't…just kill me. Do it. Just kill me. Kill me god damn it!" she screamed and broke down in tears.
"My dear Bella" I said and leaned closer "if I kill you now, I'll waste the fun!"
"Fun! Fun! Where do you see the fun, you sick bastard! I'm slowly dying and you call this fun!" she looked into my eyes with frustration.
I just stared into her eyes and she was afraid of me again.
"Why…"she swallowed loudly "why are your eyes a different color?" she asked.
Aw, so she did notice. "What do you mean?" I asked to be more certain.
"Before…and now…I mean-before they were green, like-like when I met you; and now they are… I don't know, colder, more…white" she said not believing her own words and mumbling something I didn't quiet catch, sounding like "I've gone nuts".
"Actually it's the palest blue of the ice, to be more specific. No, you haven't gone nuts. And yes, they do have a different color. They always did. Since…" I trailed off to the memory.
"Since…?"she asked.
"It doesn't matter now" I said quickly. "We're here for you, right?" I was going to benefit from the chance of her finally talking to me. Of course this ought to happen at some point, be too tired to object.
"Seriously? Again? Aren't you tired? I'm not as interest as you may thing I am."
"It doesn't matter what you think; you are interesting to me. And that's what matters the most."
"When…um…" she swallowed loudly again "when are you…" she trailed off.
I thought I knew what she meant. "Do you really want to know?"
"I don't know…" She pronounced each word separately and left a heavy sign.
"Then why did you ask?" I leaned towards her.
No answer. She just stared blankly at nothing. The darkness of the room was mirrored in her watery eyes. I took her chin with my hand and made her look into my eyes. "Don't ask for information you know you don't need." I paused. "But answer to the questions you are being asked." She stared at me some more and then took her sight off me.
I sat back at my chair. "I tell what we'll do. I'm going to give you a chance. If you answer my questions I'll untie you, and you can sit on the chair again. What do you say?"
"What if I say no?" she said looking my behind her lashes.
"Then we'll just have to wait when you're legs start working again, so you can stand up. Of course later we have to wait for your arms as well because it will happen the same… and then your legs again…." I looked at her in a skeptical way. "I've seen it and that's how it goes on and on. It's tiring, frustrating and will get you to a dead end. So, what do you say?"
She sat there, her little body hanging from the ropes staring at the floor. She was actually considering on fighting it. Thinking of hurting herself even more. Of giving me more pleasure through her endless screams and pleas.
"What else…do you want to know?" she said breaking my thoughts.
I smiled. She shuddered and flexed her frame towards the wall. "Why…why are your eyes…" she trailed off.
"What is it with my eyes?" Wasn't she tired yet?
"How come… how come they change colors?"
"They were always that way. It's kind of an old story".
"Please tell me."
"Why would you want to hear it?" what a strange creature she was. "And anyway, we've been through this again I think."
"Yeah but... I wanna know…."
Well, this wasn't a good explanation at all. "You know you're not making any sense at all, right?" I asked her.
"I know" she said with a breath.
"You are a strange creature Isabella. Very strange." I signed. "But perhaps this story will enlighten you a bit as far as your situation is concerned. Well, the thing is that I had that thing since I can remember myself. From a little kid I was always fascinated with the idea of beautiful. I was obsessed with it, to be more specific. My eyes would light with excitement and joy each time I found something beautiful. I guess that also has to do with me being a bit selfish as well" I chuckled at her. And quite possessive, but I didn't say that out loud.
"That color you see now," I said leaning my head closer so she could see "I was ten when it first appeared. My mum…. "I signed to the memory "she was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen to this day. Nothing can be compared to her. Absolutely nothing." I closed my eyes for a brief second, to remember her.
Esme Cullen. A princess coming out of a fairytale. Long wavy black hair, white porcelain skin, big blue eyes like the sea, red passionate lips and a figure so light it was breathtaking. My dad had made an excellent choice. I was proud she got to be my mum. I was also proud that she was mine and no one else's. Forever.
I opened my eyes and looked at Bella with a big smile that frightened her. "When you find something beautiful, something that takes your breath away, what would you do to make it yours? How far would you be willing to go to keep it with you forever, no matter what?"
We stared at each other for a moment. None of us was breaking the silence. The tense in the room was obvious. Bella's fear and confusion, was mixed with my excitement and loss between the past and the nonce. I decided to continue and be over with it.
"Remember when I told you, my mum passed away and we moved here? I think it's more appropriate to tell you what really happened. My mum was the first person to experience this" I said gesturing my hand towards her. "This situation I mean." I stayed silent, waiting for her to process the information and put the pieces together.
She looked at me not really understanding, or maybe not wanting to understand. I leaned closer and whispered to her ear. "Bella… I forced my mother to suicide. I was holding a pistol in my temple and threaten to shut myself. She wouldn't do it any other way. It was her or me." With that I got away from her.
She stayed there, her body jerking from shudders that increased into violent shaking and crying. She never looked up. Her leg flinched once. And then nothing. I felt like I was losing her. She was passing out. No! I couldn't let that happen. I went to the desk. Opened the drawer. Took a bottle of cologne I had for occasions like these. Walk furiously back at Bella.
She looked like a dream. In the dim light, her expressions were calm and serene; her hair like a satin curtain on front of her heart shaped face. No, that was wrong. Her face was like a moon. A half-moon. A half glowing and stunning moon right in the middle of a dark night with no stars that could steal his shine. She, once more, was breathtaking. Slowly, I felt a single tear running through my chick. Quickly I took it away with my finger and smiled at her.
I placed the bottle somewhere on the floor and slowly untied Bella. I was so proud of her at that moment. I took her in my arms and held her there for a second, embracing her. I sat us down for a minute. I took some hair out of her face and traced the outline of her lips. They were dehydrated and bloody in the inside. I guess she was chewing them out of fear.
I never told the story of my mother to anyone else. No one else asked me to speak. She might have a plan of getting out of here alive, that's why. I caressed her face lightly with my thumb. Her skin was so soft. Or it might be that I hadn't come so close to a woman like that before. This feeling I had for her now was so powerful, nothing could take it down. I felt like a God, holding the first angel he created.
I got up and took her in my lap. I walked slowly to the chair and placed her there. I took the bottle from my pocket, opened it and brought it to her nose. She stayed motionless for a few seconds, but then I noticed she started breathing. Slowly I brought her head up and left her side. Put the bottle back to its place and took the scissors. In less than five seconds Bella's T-shirt was destroyed; cut in the middle, revealing me her small breasts and the truth of her words.
Her whole chest was covered with paler marks than her skin color. All across from the right to the left side, Bella's chest was tucked and lifted in a strange way. White scars were all over her breasts and down her stomach. I traced them with my fingers, touching her pale nipples, forming their shape in my hand and going to the place between her small breasts. She felt cold, but so extraordinary at the same time. But still asleep. What would happen if…
I got up with a move and light a cigarette. I blew some fume and turned my head to her. Still the same. I walked slowly to her, the only sound breaking the silence my steps. I looked closely at the cigarette in my fingers. Then at Bella. With no hesitation and second thought I brought it between her breasts, to the center of her chest, just a few inches away from her heart and pressed it against her skin.
Bella opened her eyes with a loud shriek of pain, discomfort and disorientation. She clenched her hands into fists at her sides and looked around. Her sight fell at my hands burning her skin. Just when she was about to grab my hands I removed them and she put hers at the place I burned before. She was moving them fiercely, like she was trying to get something out of them. Blood started coming out then and she started screaming 'get it out, please get it out'.
"Please! Just do something! Get it out of me now! Please! Get it out! It's too much" over and over again she filled the room with those words. She was acting like there was a fire going on the top of her body. She was probably hallucinating and imagining things. Maybe a déjà-vu from her accident or a nightmare.
I took a step back and admired the way her hands were crawling on her skin, opening little wounds on her flesh with her damaged nails. Blood, screams, pain they were all dancing around the room, making it sound like an orchestra in my ears. All these things I've missed for so long they were here again, now. I crooked my head at my side and smiled, closing my eyes. I left a sign escape my lips. It was time now.
I walked to the desk and took in my hands the pistol. One shot. One single shot, that's all it was missing. That was the end and the beginning. I walked to her with the gun in my hand and offered it to her. She stopped scraping her skin.
"When you want something beautiful to stay beautiful forever, what do you do?" I asked her as I offered my hand to her. "It's time Isabella. You're only step away from eternity. You know what you have to do."
She looked at me behind her lashes. Slowly she raised her head and pierced me with her look. Her eyes were wide with shock, fear draw in them. She was looking intensely at me, her sight going rapidly left and right; she was trying to adjust to my statement.
I lowered my knees a bit and looked at her. "Bella, are you here?" She seemed elsewhere body and mind. I took a strand of her hair and put them behind her ear. She jerked at my touch.
"Don't be afraid little girl" I whispered near her ear "death is just an idea".
She looked at me with questioning eyes. Eyes wide open full of fear loss. She was sobbing again. "What do you mean-what do you want me to do?" she said through heavy breaths and pants.
"You know what I want you do to." My hand was still open in front of her.
"I can't I can't just...you're crazy! I'm not doing it! No way! Let me go!" She wanted to get up but lost her balance and sat back again. I put my free hand on her shoulder. "You're not getting out of it, trust me. Either you do it now, or you'll be in more pain until you decide when enough it's enough. Your call."
She sniffed. "How the hell is this my call again?! I never asked for it!" she was crying again. "I want to go home….please let me go home…please Edward." She looked into my eyes.
"No." I said simply. "Not happening."
"Your eyes are as cold as your personality" she spat back.
"My eyes are ice cold right now. My heart is not. I'm doing you a favor. This could go on and on and on and it would be tiring for both of us. But I'm giving you the chance to end it. End it now."
"You know, when I met you, you seemed like the nicest person in the world. And I thought my bad luck was fading away and I started breathing again. Really breathing; and feeling. And now you do this. What's wrong with you?"
"I am who I am Bella. I'm different from other people but that doesn't mean I' not good-"
"You are a monster! Not only you killed other women, you killed your mother! Your own mother! How could you do that? I don't… I don't understand it." She shook her head.
"If only you could see the world through my eyes Bella…you could see the beauty I see…"
"You disgust me! You're repulsive and rotten! I hate you!" she said angry as hell.
"Oh no Bella, don't hate me. It will do you no good. You're faith is already decided. You can choose if you want to speed things up or slow them down, live in pain a little bit more." I swung the gun in front of her once more to show her what to do.
"You don't think I will actually do it." She said looking in disbelief.
"Oh yes you are" I said.
"No I won't. It's suicide. I don't want to shoot myself."
"I now you don't. But that's the way things are. Eventually you'll do it. It's now or never." I paused. "Or I could just kill you myself after torturing you to death to teach you the meaning of pain. Don't let me go that far".
She closed her eyes, and tears escaped behind her lashes. "I don't want to die".
"Bella, you won't die. You will live; forever. I will always have you in my heart and mind. For me, no one ever dies. You'll just rest for a bit. You'll close your eyes and you'll sleep." I leaned closer to her face and whispered "You leave this world, but you enter another. You will be free, with all the meaning of the word. There's nothing to be afraid of. There will be no pain, no misery" I took some tears with my fingers away "no tears."
She looked into my eyes. "All my life has been like that. Why would I want that again? And for eternity?"
"Because there, you won't remember. You'll be happy and free. No one will ever harm you there."
"Then why are you doing this? Why won't you let me go? I will forget this I promise. I am forgiving you. Honestly. This day never happened. It never existed. It was all a bad dream. Please, let me go." She begged.
"It's not that easy. Nothing is as it appears to be." I said coldly. I never gave up. I wouldn't do it now, no matter how hard she tried.
I looked at the pistol in my hand again. I felt so powerful holding it. Then I felt the knife in my back pocket. I took a step back and took it out. I held them in my hands for a second, simply observing them. I felt my adrenaline rising in my heated blood and a devilish grin spread across my face. I played with the knife in my fingers, trying to bring in my mind the following scenes.
Bella. On the floor, writhing with pain, blood purring from inside of her, her chocolate eyes alive from all the emotions she'd be experiencing. Pain; excruciating, unbearable, mind-blowing pain. I sighed and shivered at the thought happily.
I turned around and she jerked at my sight. I was panting, breathing heavily causing my chest to rise uneven. My eyes open wide with a wicked look, sparkling in the dim light, staring at my Bella coldly but with affection at the same time.
"Don't worry my dear" I said with a soft voice "this won't hurt". I let a smile break my façade "well, not that much."
Bella left a sob and a single tear escaped her eye.
"You're so beautiful" I whispered at her.
"What?" she whispered back, sniffing.
I walked slowly at her admiring my Aphrodite. I caressed her hair "Bella, you're an exquisite piece of art. You're a goddess; a Venus; My Venus." She wasn't talking and allowed me to continue. I kneeled before her. "Your skin, your eyes, your hair…" I said touching everything I said as soon as each word left my mouth. Slowly my hand dropped to her mouth and she took a deep breath. With my finger I parted her mouth "Bella, your lips…". I touched them. "Your lips" I whispered never breaking my gaze.
Slowly I brought the knife from her chic to her neck, going all the way down her neckline, her collarbones, revealing parts of her scars, as I was moving deeper down to her stomach. "Every single part of you is a piece of art. But the masterpiece lies next to your heart." I made small circles with the knife around her left breast following the same pattern of her marks.
"Don't" she whispered with a breath.
"What is it?" I asked never stopping my moves.
"Please…don't…stop that".
"You want me to stop?" I was still moving my hand.
"Yes. Please do." She trembled.
I did as she told me. Even though it would have been better if she stayed anxious.
"Alright my dear" I said and stood up. "It's time."
"Time?" she asked confused. She was so exhausted to form a full sentence.
"It's time for you to go, my dear." I smiled cheerfully.
Her eyes light up at the thought of freedom. "I can… I can go now?" she almost screamed.
"Not like you mean it."
She frowned her eyebrows in confusion. "What are you saying?...what-what do you mean?"
She heard a clicking sound that came from me and her eyes grew all wide again. "I'm fulfilling your wish. You begged me to kill you; that's exactly what I'm going to do now. "
I saw Bella's chest rising, taking a deep breath. She brought her little hands up and placed her fists on her chest. Like she was protecting something; hiding it, keeping it inside so it won't go. She managed to curl herself up in a ball on the chair. She was trying to keep herself here.
"I don't want to die" she whispered.
"That's a stupid thing to say. Eventually you will. We all die. We're humans Bella. One way or another, destiny knocks the door. And now, you kept it waiting too long outside, it starts pissing her off." I offered her the pistol. "You know what to do. Do it now."
She wouldn't unclench her fists. I held the knife in my mouth and took her hands. She was so weak and exhausted; I didn't have to put any strength at all. I placed it in her fingers. I raised my eyebrows looking at her. "It's now Bella. Don't make me do it the hard way." I said through my teeth.
I saw her little fingers flexing around the gun. Slowly she raised her eyes and hand, pointing the gun at me. I grabbed the knife from my mouth. "What if I sent someone else to open the door?"
I laughed with a breath. "You really think you can get away with this? Bella, you're mine whatever you'll try to do." I placed the tip of the knife on her stomach and pressed slightly. Her hands jerked and she started losing control. I saw it in her eyes.
The tension started building up. The fear, the loss, the trembling, the dread of the unknown; everything.
I swirled the knife on her cold skin. "Now Bella, point at the right direction."
She didn't make a move. Still, she had the gun facing me. I scratched her skin above her belly button and blood started to appear.
She screamed and lowered the gun. "If you make me do this, you'll die in about half an hour from bleeding. Not such a good idea. If you don't want to suffer, pull the trigger."
"I won't" she said through her teeth.
"Suit yourself. I wanted to give you an easy way out of it, but you're clearly very stubborn." Beautiful and stubborn, I thought. Damn I didn't want to mark her like that. I wanted her whole body unscratched. Now she was making me do this. I was pissed with her. Goddesses usually have a flawless body, and she was wanted me to destroy hers.
I took a deep breath. Damn you, I thought. I draw a line across her stomach and blood started purring out. She screamed. "See, Bella! That's what I'm talking about. I'm not good with knifes. If I do something wrong, I don't know for how long you will be suffering."
She was moaning and breathing heavily. But the gun was still in her hands. I grabbed her palm and placed it on her temple. She was going to fight me, but I wasn't gonna let her go. I wanted her. I needed Bella. "Do it now." I said coldly.
She shook her head as 'no'. I sighed. Another line of blood was drawn on her stomach. Another moan and scream followed it. "I'm giving you some time. Not much, but some. I don't want to pierce right through your stomach, because that would be too painful. Now Bella, do it."
"I hate you" she sobbed.
"It will all be easier once you're done with it. And later you won't hate me."
"Later I won't exist!" she said with all the strength she'd left.
"Yes you will. Don't believe everything other people say Bella."
"And why should I believe you?"
"Because I care for you."
"If you did, I wouldn't be here."
"I am, and that's exactly the reason why you're here."
She cried. Slowly tears started falling from her eyes all the way down her chicks and neck.
I put the tip of the knife in her bellybutton and she hitched. "Hurts, doesn't it? One shot Bella, one shot." And you'll be mine forever. But I didn't say that out loud.
She stayed silent, crying and sobbing. I didn't have much time. If Carlisle decided to return earlier for any reason whatsoever, I needed an excuse for what I had been doing all day. I had some hidden painting to show him, but I wanted to spent time with my Bella.
She gave me no option. Well, I would deal with the wound later. I took the knife and slowly started pushing it through her stomach. Blood started purring out like water from a fount and I felt Bella's body connected to mine through that little knife. It was that feeling of connection all over again. Bella and I were one with the help of that little metal thing that bound us in a strange way.
I took it out and focused on her screaming. "It will be like this. Each time I will be using the knife, I will only be going one inch far, until the whole knife is in you. Think about it Bella. It might take all day long."
She lowered her screams into sobs and deeps breaths. I must say she was strong. I took the pistol and placed it on her right temple. "You know what you have to do. " I said and took my seat on the chair across her.
She took a deep breath without moving. I think she was going through to all the things I said to her. All that pain; physical and emotional. She could end it. Then I saw her expression changing. She was thinking of something else. Something I couldn't quite understand.
Before I could say anything I heard a gunshot. Smoke was coming from her hand. She had pulled the trigger and the shot was wasted on the wall. She wasted it. She fucking wasted it.
"What have you done?" I was so frustrated.
She smiled. She was weak as hell, but forced a smile a self- (αυταρεσκο) smile on her face. "What? No more bullets?"
"Are you mocking me?" I got up and grabbed her hair. "Do you think this is funny?" I pulled the hard and she screamed. But she was still smiling.
"You think you can beat me in my own game?! Is that what you think?" I hit her chic with all my strength causing her face to turn behind her back. I pulled her hair and brought her face in front of me. A red mark was beginning to form on her face on the shape of my palm.
"You listen to me! No one-and I repeat no one" I threaded her while pulling her hair harder "was as lucky as you were. Remember that the next time you decide to act like that."
She was screaming from pain. I let her head fall and some hair left on my palm. I turned my head away from her extremely frustrated. Who-
She was laughing. She was what? I turned my head only to see Bella laughing hard, laughing from her soul. A loud crazy laugh that pierced right in my ears. Shut up, shut p, shut up-
"Shut up!" I screamed and turned slapping her with all my strength. She wasn't gonna bit me on my own game. I wasn't gonna let a little girl turn my rules against me.
Her laugh has now turned into cry. That was better. For now. I had to act fast. I didn't have much time left, and thanks to her seeing another suicide was now out of the question. I had to deal with her myself just like every other time. The magic was gone thanks to her.
I was furious. I let her destroy my plans. What did I do wrong? While I was wondering, Bella started breaking her crying and transforming it into laughter again. She was beginning to annoy me.
Shut up at last! I grabbed my knife –where I had placed it I couldn't remember, but my hands managed to find their way to it- and with a sudden turn of my body I injured her.
Seconds later I saw blood dripping to the floor. It was coming from my knife. I was holding it tight in my fist. My hands were full of blood as well.
On the floor there was Bella quiet at last. I scratched her mouth and stabbed her stomach deeper. There was a hole in her belly with red-almost dark- blood coming out of it. Bella's eyes were wide open looking at the space in front of her, with life coming out of them. Just like in the movies she had her hands around her wound and tried to whisper something. I crooked my head at one side amused by her sight. She opened her lips and with her last breaths she said "It's not over". She pursed her mouth into a smile and never looked up.
What? What did she mean by that? I made a step forward to her to-I stopped. Carlisle. That was his car on the driveway. He was early. Shit! Shit shit shit shit shit! I'd deal with her later.
I quickly climbed the stairs still holding the knife tight in my fist more pissed with my father than ever before.
A/N:
Well, this is it. I hope you'll like it. This was my first attempt to write fan fiction, and I just wanted someone to tell me how much I suck, or if you think I'm any good at it. (I know I suck at putting titles!) I'm not hoping of winning this contest, I just wanted to see how far my sick and disturbed mind can go, and what people think of it. I don't think I will actually write something else or if I do, I don't know if I'll ever find the balls to put it on fan fiction. But if for any reason whatsoever you like that (in which case thank you very very much) I promise I'll do my best. Please let me know how much you'll like it or hate it. Thank you!
When I'm talking about Edward's eye color, think of Aro's eyes (Michael Sheen in New Moon), but with a dead ice blue color. That was what I was trying to describe, but I don't know if I gave the impression I wanted. I didn't do a Bella POV, because it would be way too long, so I put Edward saying whatever Bella was/might be thinking.
I forgot what else I wanted to say. :P Feel free to ask anything.
