Thoughts of Grell's past invaded his mind again as he tried to fall into a dreamless sleep. He could hear his parents scream matches going on before Grell could even get into his house, It was like every other day though. Just another day of declaring hate instead of proclaiming love.
when I was younger I saw
my daddy cry
and curse at the wind
He had to get his mind off things, and he only knew one person who would listen without complaint. So as he walked towards the funeral parlor that the Undertaker worked at, the redhead hoped that the man would be awake at the late hour.
he broke his own heart and I watched
as he tried to reassemble it
He walked around searching for the specific coffin he knew Undertaker favored, and as he did so, he caught his reflection in one of the jars that were scattered across the room. The figure was distorted but he could still see the emotion his face was portraying. It was the same fear and sorrow that he knew when his father finally abandoned his mother and left them with nothing. Not a penny to their names.
He was awake even though he pretended not to be, and he saw his mom bring in strange men, who left about an hour later. He pretended he didn't know why they were there.
and my momma swore that she would
never let herself forget
"Grell, love doesn't exist. Its an imaginary concept that only fools believe in. Theres only lust in this world. And sometimes idiots take that lust and tell themselves it's that love they yearned for for so long." she would tell him every morning before she left.
"Grell? What are you doing here? Ehehe not that you aren't welcomed of course.." A tired voice yawned the words behind the troubled redheaded reaper. Grell turned around surprised and looked at the Undertaker. His yellow-green eyes were fully visible and they were focused entirely on Grell, his green orbs that were rarely seen were portraying looks of worry and excitement.
and that was the day that I promised
I'd never sing of love
if it does not exist
Grell had never believed in love, only lust, the need for human closeness. He tried seeking out that lust with Sebastian and William, but something didn't feel right. And to make matters worse his 'feelings' If you'd call them that, were never returned.
Then he met the Undertaker, and at first Grell was quite frightened of the man. But as he got to know the strange man who worked at the funeral parlor, he learned to feel close to him. And not close like he'd known his whole life, it was different. He scorned himself for being a fool who momentarily believed love was real.
He quickly wrapped the Undertaker in a tight embrace, he needed to feel safe and secure, even if only for a while.
The elder reaper was surprised at first, but he returned the hug happily, giggling like a lunatic all the while. "My my, someones feeling quite affectionate today~" the Undertaker said.
but darling you are the only exception
Grell pulled away quickly. "what are you talking about, you old loon?" he said trying to convey anger and confusion. he moved his hand up to his face to hide the fact that Grell was blushing a deeper red than anything his wardrobe held.
you are the only exception
"Was there something you needed me for Grell? Eh hee you weren't out killing again were you? I'd rather not be cleaning bodies at this late hour.." the mortician said sitting on a closed coffin. "No, no, It's not like that.. May I?" Grell asked, beckoning to sit down beside him.
you are the only exception
Undertaker nodded and Grell sat down next to him, scooting closer slightly.
"Lately, I've been having nightmares.. About my human life.." Grell said quietly. The man nodded for a moment and looked at Grell.
"I see.. Yes that happens on occasion with every reaper, It will pass, believe me." The Undertaker said chuckling lightly. Grell smiled lightly at the silver-haired reaper. "Yes, But thats not why I came to you.."
you are the only exception
The man remained silent, expecting Grell to finish his statement before he said anything. "Well obviously I need to get my beauty sleep, and I can't sleep with this night terrors. What do you suppose I do to solve this?"
and maybe I know somewhere
deep in my soul
that love never lasts
The Undertaker laughed again. He knew what the redhead was suggesting, but he wanted to play along until Grell finally confessed. "Well I suppose I could take a look inside that pretty little head of yours. I could get my scalpel if you wished! heeheehee" The man was laughing wildly at the thought.
Grell was terrified for a moment, as he always was when the man said things like that, but afterwards he laughed lightly and responded. "No! No no no no no! I don't doubt that I'd be safe, but I cannot scar my beautiful face! you truly are mad Undertaker!"
and we've got to find other ways
to make it alone
and keep a straight face
"Well then what do you suggest we do about this? I can't take these dreams away you know.. I'm no miracle man."
There was that feeling again. What was it? It felt like lust, with a more, emotional attachment. Was it love Grell felt for Undertaker? Maybe his mother was wrong after all, maybe love was real. Maybe his mother and father didn't know what love was.
and i've always lived like this
keeping a comfortable distance
"Grell?" Undertaker said waving his long nailed fingers in front of the redheads face. "Huh? Oh yes, sorry. I don't know honestly.. Maybee.." He stopped talking for a moment, It was stupid to think Undertaker would feel the same way that Grell did. It was just a silly crush, nothing more, nothing less.
and up until now i have sworn to myself
that i'm content
with loneliness
because none of it was ever worth the risk
The Undertaker wished he could slap himself. Why was he saying nothing?! He finally had his moment to tell Grell how he felt, and here he was sitting here silently like a fool! "Yes Grell? Maybe what?" that was the only thing that would come out of his mouth.
"Um, maybe I could sleep with you? For.. Warmth.. You see my home is very very cold and-" Grell babbled nervously on and on. His words were stopped when a pair of lips met his softly. It took Grell a moment to realize what was going on.
but you are the only exception
The Undertaker was kissing Grell. His heart was racing and his head was pounding. Grell had never felt this way before.
He wrapped his arms around the man and kissed him back, all he wanted to do was be closer to Undertaker, closer to the one he loved. Sebastian nor Will had ever made Grell feel this way, because Grell wasn't in love with Sebastian or Will or anyone in the world but Undertaker.
you are the only exception
As they kissed, the only thought Grell could muster was that he wanted to spend his life with the Undertaker. No matter what happened that was all he wanted.
They pulled away from the kiss, and breathing heavily Undertaker spoke to Grell. "Of course you can.. You look tired though. Would you like me to show you to a guest room?"
you are the only exception
"Er, that sounds lovely.. but you see, I may have wanted to sleep in a close vicinity to you.. If it was okay with you of course.." Grell said blushing brightly. This time he did not hide the blush, he didn't feel he needed to. He felt totally safe right there with Undertaker.
"Of course you can.." The man smiled brightly, which was responded to with another smile coming from Grell. "thank you.."
you are the only exception!
He showed Grell to the large coffin that Undertaker found comfiest, and they both laid inside. Their limbs were intertwined and Grell's head was resting on the mortician's shoulder. His consciousness was fading fast, and as Undertaker stroked Grells soft red hair lightly, Grell whispered something faintly.
I've got a tight lip for reality but i can't
let go of what's in front of me here
"Undertaker, I think I love you. Even though love doesn't exist and I'm a fool for tricking myself into thinking that it's real." The man's eyes widened. He knew that Grell didn't believe in love. so what did this mean? As he looked to ask he realized Grell had already succumbed to a deep sleep.
i know you're leavin in the morning when you wake up
leave me with some kind of proof its not a dream
Instead he smiled and kissed the top of Grells forehead. "I love you too Grell.. And I can't wait until you realize that love is real. I've been trying to show you that from the start.."
woah, you are the only exception
you are the only exception
