Sirius Black: The Love Of His Life

The early morning breeze swept through my hair.

The air was cool and crisp.

I was in my most deep state of relaxation, of peace, of carelessness.

In the forest, masterless and free I roamed for 3 hours every morning at 3:00 am.

The darkish blue skies and the cool early breeze gave me feelings that I adored and cherrished, just like my dearest friends.

Going to the forest gave me a chance to experience peace on earth, once every few hours in the morning.

Pity it couldn't last a lifetime.

Moony, Wormtail and Prongs never knew of my "early morning walks".

They never needed to.

All they know is that I'm really cheerful in the morning, when they wake up.

I did this ever morning to disapate the pain I endure every day for what I have done to ...

Silence truly is golden, and tonight I shall forever remain silent in the stomachs of non - changable werewolves.

Finally, I could put myself and my friends at peace.

If I never forgave myself for what I did to them, why should they?

I felt, worried, for the first time that morning.

As the trees swayed and the breeze blew I felt a feeling of concern lodged into my mind, so, naturaly, because I was unable to dismis it from my mind, I thought about it.

Would James miss me? Would lupin miss me? No. They hated me, that was a fact.

If what I'm going to do will make my friends happy then I'll do it without a second thought.

I walked and walked, deeper and deeper into the forest.

I then began to realize, that I myself had no care for my own well fare.

They hated me they could do so much better without me. All I do is slow them down and prevent them from being their best.

I had to do it. There is no other way to silence the pain I felt and the pain I bring to my friends.

I walked closer and closer to the werewolf territory site until I got there.

I felt excellent in their presence as I came closer and closer to their line of sight.

Werewolves never attacked or hurt me, it's strange really. As a matter of fact they allow me to pet and feed them.

I think it's because of Re... silence is golden.

Because he was once my friend and hates me now I think I've developed a way with werewolves.

I understand them.

The pain they feel of being loathed because of who they are.

I feel the pain of being loathed by my best friend.

I'll make my death worth while. I can promise myself that.