Disclaimer: I don't own Fairy Tail (it belongs to Hiro Mashima) or the song 'I can't dance' (it belongs to Genesis).
AU: This story was the first one I published here at . I read it again some time ago, and was ashamed about all the spelling mistakes and stuff, so I tried to correct it after the best of my ability. Which… isn't much, I can give you that.
Can Talk
"And when are you going up?"
It was evening, which - of course - meant nothing to the rough band of Fairy Tail. If anything, it just gave them an excuse to congregate. And this evening, someone had spontaneously decided to transform the usual carousing that took place every evening , into a full blown Karaoke party. Right now, Elfman was on stage, singing 'Johnny, I hardly knew ya', much to the amusement of everyone.
"Who said I was going up?" That was Natsu. He looked slightly confused and irritated, due to his blond, obviously female, comrade, who had been bugging him all evening. Just as soon as he had sat down at the bar, tired from a particularly exhausting mission, not energetic for once. "Im just saying. Gazille and and Gray have already been up there. You wouldn't want to lose to them, now, right?"
He tried not to show that she had hit a sensitive nerve there. Sometimes, it irked him that Lucy was able to push his buttons so easily. Gritting his teeth, determined not to be pushed around by someone he was not able to just beat the crap out of when he felt that it was time to take the argument further than throwing insults, he gave his best to persevere. "I heard Gray saying that he's sure that no one could bring a better show than him" Lucy continued to tease. Natsu felt that he began to loose control over his face as his right eyebrow began to twitch uncontrollably. 'So close, so close, so close…'
On stage, Elfman had finally finished his song after singing the chorus repeatedly for seven times straight. About time, Natsu thought. There was no way he could stand Lucy grating on his nerves plus another 'guns and drums'.
Speaking of Lucy, Natsu registered dimly that Lucy was talking to him again. "…-ease, with sugar, and ice cream, and, and, and fire on top? Come on, do it for me." Natsu didn't even look at her. "You're doing the puppy eyes right now, aren't you?" he asked. Lucy was silent for a moment. Then she said "No?". Gods, I think no one ever dished out a greater lie to me than that!Lucy tried again. "Com on, now. You should be lucky that I'm still only asking. I could just go and tell Erza to…" He interrupted her, simply by pointing at the buffet.
Lucy's eyes widened as she followed the point of his finger. Because there, on the table, laid the Titania, smeared over and over with strawberry cheesecake, sawing like a drunken sailor. Lucy let out an unbelieving laugh. "Is… Is this really, actually happening?" Then she remembered why that was a bad thing. "Aw, come on. Does this mean that there is now no way for me to enforce my naive and innocent desires?"
Suddenly, she looked, down at Natsu, smiling, and he shivered as cold dread rose in his chest and spread dark wings. "Natsu-, you know, if you would just do it, we could get out of here rea-lly fast after you're done, if you know what I mean." She leaned closer to him, bringing her breasts in a tactically more advantageous position. Come closer, she began to rub his arms. She was so close now that her scent was making him dizzy. He quickly backed off, feeling his face heating up. She stood up to followed him and, again, came dangerously close. Suddenly he found himself trapped between her and the bar counter.
Natsu looked desperately for an escape route, but his concentration was quickly drained as he felt soft arms around his shoulders and something else at his chest. He looked up, just to find Lucy's face almost directly in front of his. "That's not fair!" he protested weakly. Lucy just grinned. "Tough luck, buddy." Natsu averted his face quickly as she came even closer, but now she had access to his earlobe… "Alright! I give, I give!" He dashed away form her as she let go of him, his expression a mask of horror. Lucy was still grinning evilly. "Now, was that so hard?" Natsu just gave her a sour look. Then he fled in the direction of the stage.
"Alright everybody, an applause for Natsu!" Of course, it had fallen to Mirajane to play announcer. "His song will be a surprise." The guild members clapped enthusiastically. (Author's Note: Begin playing "I Can't Dance". On Youtube or whatever.)
Natsu came on stage. He had seemed a bit uncomfortable before at the prospect of going up there, but that impression disappeared almost immediately once he came up . As the music started, he began to flip his fingers to the rhythm of the song. Everybody's eyes grew wide as they recognized the melody. Natsu grinned. Then suddenly, his feet burst into flames.
Hot sun, beating down,
burning my feet just walking around.
Hot sun, making me sweat.
'Gators getting close, hasn't got me yet.
He jumped off the stage, stalking through the lines of benches, slowly approaching the bar, his eyes trained on Lucy. In his path was a trail of fiery footprints.
I can't dance, I can't talk
The only thing about me is the way that I walk.
I can't dance, I can't sing
I'm just standing here selling everything.
Natsu was now standing in front of Lucy grinning down at her. Then, he suddenly bent down and picked up Plue, who had been sitting under Lucy's chair. Natsu set him down at the bar and sat down next to him.
Blue Jean's sitting on the beach,
her dog's talking to me, but she's out of reach.
She's got a body under that shirt,
but all she wants to do is rub my face in the dirt.
Jumping on top of the bar and 'accidentally' kicking down some drinks, he turned back to the guild. "Okay, guy's, you know the chorus now, help me out here a little bit."
Cause I can't dance, I can't talk,
The only thing about me is the way that I walk.
I can't dance, I can't sing
I'm just standing here selling-
Oh, and checking everything's in place
you never know who's looking on.
He jumped to down at the floor again, and turned around, to where Gray and the others were sitting. After giving them a hard look, he smirked.
Young punk spilling beer on my shoes
Fat guys talking to me, trying to steal my blues
Thick smoke, see her smiling through,
I never thought so much could happen just shooting pool.
"Your turn again, guys!"
But I can't dance, I can't talk,
The only thing about me is the way that I walk.
I can't dance, I can't sing
I'm just standing here selling-
Oh, and checking everything's in place
you never know who's looking on.
A perfect body
with a perfect face… Uh-hu.
He turned around to Lucy again, grinned and winked. Then jumped effortlessly back on stage.
"Okay, guys, on last time"
No, I can't dance, I can't talk
the only thing about me is the way that I walk
No, I can't dance, I can't sing
I'm just standing here, selling everything.
But I can walk
No, I can't cance
No no no, I can't dance
But I can walk
As the music finally faded out, the guild burst into cheers. Natsu just grinned, bowed mockingly once, and left the spotlight. On his way back to the bar, people were patting his shoulder, saying things like "Well done, man." and "Why're you still here, superstar?". Happy came down from his favorite spot in the woodwork under the roof. "Wow, that was so cool! Can we sing together later? Please? We will, won't we?" Natsu cringed in reaction. "Yeeeaaahhh… Maybe later." His reluctant tone seemed lost to Happy, who just said. "Okay!" and took off directly after.
When Natsu had finally reached the bar, he was greeted by a speechless Lucy. "Satisfied?" He asked. Lucy sputtered something incoherently. Natsu just grinned. "At least I can talk."
AU: I know the ending is a bit… I think you know what I mean. I'm not exactly happy with it, either, but I left it that way. Otherwise, it messes the story up too much.
Anyway, please comment and let me know which parts you liked (if you liked any of it, of course) and which not, so I can do a better job next time.
