It's always an honor.

To see what I've seen, it will alter your mind for the worst. I thought being a solider was difficult, but leading men and women is even harder. Some of the men and women I've sent into battle have never come back, friends lost to never return.

Every once in a while I remember soldiers of mine. Like now I'm remembering one, Jay. Now Jay was the rudest person ever. He once talked back to the Princess, that was brave, but extremely rude, and everyone in my unit got punished, Jay a little more. Jay may be rude, but when it came down to a fight, he was ready to give his life for his fellow brother in arms. Jay was the best solider I had; I wish I had ten more like him.

"Don't look now, but here comes the a-hole," these were the first words I hear out of Jay's mouth, about five years ago.. I knew he was going to be trouble from the start, but I dealt with him properly. That first day of training was the toughest with him: hand-to-hand combat.

"These will be one of your best weapons out on the field," I said to the fresh recruits.

"Our hands?" Jay sassed back, he's good at sass-back.

"Yes your hands, recruit," I remember I walked up to Jay after saying that and flipping him over me. He was crying out in pain, I guess he hit the ground too hard, "Get up recruit."

"You are an ass," Jay said to me getting up. I laughed on the inside about that, but I couldn't show that they can get to me.

"You will start, or end, every sentence, out of your mouth, with sir," I had to strictly say to him, "You got that, punk."

"Sir, you are starting something you don't want to, sir" he said sir with so much sarcasm.

"Oh, really?" I had to get in his face, "You can't even defend yourself from a simple flip. I think I can handle anything you can dish out, recruit."

"Get away from my face."

"You don't like that I'm so close to you?"

"Back off," Jay shoved me away. I didn't like what I did next. But he deserved it.

"Okay. Put them up," I took off my shirt, and showed my muscle. I put up my fist ready to fight.

"You are gonna regret this," he unzipped his recruit hoodie and threw it to the nearest recruit. He put up his fist ready to fight me.

He had no chance against me. He came at me first, swinging like a wild man. His blows were easy to dodge and once I found the right moment, I pounced. I tackled him to the ground, and he hit the ground with another hard thud. I got in a mount position and said, "This is your last chance to take everything back," but he just looked up at me with such hate in his eyes, but I remember that there was a little bit of fear, "I'm sorry to do this to you, recruit," I said before I started to wail on his face. He blocked a few of my punches, but the ones that got passed must have felt like bricks. He was bleeding from his nose, lip, and mouth; I really only hit him four times.

I stopped punching and I noticed all the blood. I got off of him and extended my hand to him. He looked at me with his already swelling eyes and grabbed my hand, with a little hesitation. I help pick himself up and say to him, "You know how to take a punch, recruit."

"When you live with long enough with my dad, you get used to it," Jay had a little smile when he said that, "You got a few good hits in."

"Yeah, why don't cha go to the medic station and get cleaned up?" I order him.

"If it's okay with you, sir," he started to say, "Those moves will be handy to know next time I decide to fight you, so I'm going to stay. The medic station can wait, sir."

"Ok," I said to this brave man, "But I don't want you complaining. In fact, I want you to work even harder than everyone. You want this; you're gonna get it."

"Yes, sir," Jay said to me. The day went on, the training went well. Jay improved his fighting skills, anything added is an improvement to how he was fighting, and didn't complain once when he got hit in the face. Of course when training for the day was over, he went over to the medic station to get looked at.

Jay was a great solider, but he was only one of the many greats I had the honor to fight with. If only you knew just how hard it is to be someone's leader, and friend, and watch them die all at once. I wish you never experience that: I wish I never did.