Author's Note: This is an old one-shot I created after watching a ton of psychological thrillers a couple months back. It's a little bit rambley, I was more interested in the psychological aspect than a really deep plot. The ending is kind of abrupt because past me decided to suddenly stop writing it, so annoyed present me slapped an ending on it. Any ideas for a better ending, please let me know~
Hasty Disclaimer: All Yu-Gi-Oh! character profiles belong to manga artist Kazuki Takahashi. I only take ownership of the small bit of plot there is, as this work is non-profit and purely meant for.. Um.. Entertainment?
It was a gift to be invited to the Paradius house. Indeed, quite the honor, in fact. The Paradius name was cultivated meticulously by the man named Dartz Paradius. With no family relations to share the position, Dartz held a strong grasp on society's most informed. Paradius was a symbol of prestige all by itself, funding research of quantum physics, chronic metal illness, to cancer treatments. At the helm was he; Dartz Paradius.
The mysterious man seemed to be in a realm of his own. Talking to him, was surely like talking to a higher power, for as he spoke, you were guaranteed something intelligent would be rested upon you, though only if you were lucky. Every four months, an awe-ful soirée would be held at the first of the month within the Paradius Mansion. There, exclusive men and women alike were invited from all different origins. If you were hand-delivered that small, yet elegant white and gold envelope with the Orichalcos Seal on it, that was a true trophy. A symbol of acknowledgement of your intellectual prowess.
Once you were accepted, you knew your life would never quite be the same. This event is one of deep conversation. You were to enjoy the evening from 6:30 in the afternoon up to 12:00 in the morning. Of course, the food was something the prime minister would be envious of, and the setting was extravagant, but it was the conversations that were truly immaculate. You were expected to linger the entire night, and throughout, you would hear excited theories, passionate debates, hushed conspiracies, wise philosophies, and unique trades of knowledge. This is what fired up the night of the first day of every fourth month.
And if you were really special, you would catch the attention of the host himself.
I never thought of myself as the type to every be invited to, or be seen at the Paradius Mansion. After all, writers are hardly the people you think of when recollecting the name 'Paradius'. You think of scientists that found a serum for bone regeneration, or a detective that solved the one mystery the trumped the world, or the literal human thesaurus whom could recollect endless facts of the universe. Not a writer like me who spends their you days holed up inside of their house in the darkness of their room for days at a time. The biggest press coverage I get, is thankfully only when I get a new book published. Though that's probably partially my fault, I don't like the spotlight.
I'm terribly nervous to be around so many of these intellectual celebrities, the modern Einstein's. Yes, no one would have ever heard my name before and asked me what I 'did'. And I would smile awkwardly and say that I, "write realistic fiction novels", all while the other goes on to say they created a new, more effective form of government.
If I could, I would rather just save myself the embarrassment and humiliation and not go.
But like always, curiosity has come to kill me.
~December 1st, on a freezing winter night~
The place was like a stronghold, standing proud as it seemed to devour the beautiful minds of the people whom entered. They walked with the gait of a deity, they knew their power and fed off the knowledge of others to further build their strength.
Inside, elegant music played, only singing to those worthy of their gifts. And then with the final note, strangled from the necks of the violins, the music ceased. And the man stepped out of the shadows, light seeming to cascade off of him, for his power was so great. The music obeyed only him. And the murmurs were held back, waiting for the words of the significant man.
"Good evening to all whom came tonight on the first of December." His voice was as soothing yet assured as his very presence itself. Standing tall, long shimmering strands of aqua blue hair cascaded down his back, held loosely behind him. Long bangs caressed his flawless features, and ultimately made it impossible to look away from his eyes. They shone, almost seemed to glow. As if truly the windows into the soul, his eyes were intensely heterochromatic. One shone with the wealth of one million golden coins, while the other glowed with the wisdom of the ocean itself.
He welcomed us all, both new and returning. But his voice was short, and his words powerful yet simple. And with that, the silence was dismissed and he bid us a goodnight. I stood for a moment awkwardly, how would one even go about conversing with that man? Talking is a whole different idea, as talking doesn't necessary suggest the other is listening. Ah-
I turned, running straight into someone else. The man turned, he smiled. And I frowned.
"I'm sorry.." I murmured apologetically, embarrassment already working its way into my chest.
"Oh, it's no problem, my friend. I haven't seen you here before, but tell me, what's your name?" He smiled, his voice warmer than melted dark chocolate.
He possessed an artful German accent to his tongue and I felt curiosity fight with my embarrassment, "My name's Yugi, Yugi Mutou."
His face lit up and I blinked, "Oh, I've always wanted to meet you! My name's Siegfried Von Schroeder, I've read every one of your books." He gushed in appreciation, grasping my hand and shaking it.
I was beyond stunned. He's read my books? This man is owner of Schroeder Corp., home to the most secure computers in the world. Surely.. He's got better things to do than read my books. But I couldn't help but feel a warmth in my chest.
"You're so young, too.. I always pictured you as some wiser old man, to know that you're this young is even more incredible. Astounding really." He continued, causing me to blush in embarrassment.
"Please.. All I've done is write books. People like you create things for the future, to contribute to society." I replied.
He scrunched his nose up in disagreement, "What's the point of contributing if you don't have something to look forward to? Your book are a psychological genius. They make people become aware the the harsh realities of life in a beautiful writing style." He murmured.
He sure is persistent. I decided to let it go with a sigh and instead smiled and thanked him for his praise. We continued to talk beyond simply our own devices, and it seemed like with every sentence spoken, the other would swallow it whole. There just wasn't enough. Siegfried was a glorious speaker. Everything he meant to say seemed to be perfectly expressed through every part of him. Whereas I am neither so fortunate nor so talented as he. My place, hopelessly, is on paper. Nonetheless, we continued to converse.
In between a particularly complex topic, Siegfried flagged down one of the footmen. No doubt, his wrist was used to the effortless motion to get a servant's attention. The footman stood perfectly straight in his tuxedo, one hand behind his back, the other holding up a metal tray with shimmering crystal wine glasses balanced perfectly atop.
Siegfried motioned to the tray while looking to me, and I smiled but shook my head. Seigfried then took his own glass, and dismissed the server with the turn of his body back to me.
For a minute, I allowed myself a second to breathe. The space around us was intense with interaction. Some people stood to the side, talking in low murmurs while some stood in larger groups, fighting for their voice to be heard in heated debates.
"You should try your hand at one." Siegfried's smooth voice started, as he took a sip from the rich fruit mixture.
"At what?" I turned back to him.
"A debate, of course." He gestured towards one of the groups, "I myself don't have a clear enough mind to sought through all of the rapid knowledge, but you, I think you'd do well." He nodded.
I felt another twinge of curiosity irk my stomach, and I gave a hesitant shake of my head, "I'm terrible under pressure."
Siegfried took no mind to my statement, and continued, "The best way to do it is to simply go up to someone, and state your side of an argument."
"They should take to it nicely, if it's a topic they're comfortable with. If not, there are plenty of people who would be, listening anyhow." Siegfried let his ice blue eyes drift to the different people, flicking a long strand of burgundy plum hair behind his shoulder.
I sighed again, this time in dismay. Because I knew my conscience had lost the battle, "Alright.." I trailed off, before wandering casually towards one of the men towards the back of a group in mind.
I trise to swallow my nerves, "Ok.. U-Um.. Nature versus nurture."
The man that turned looked to be maybe a couple years older than Siegfried. His eyes shone an electric yellow gold, and his hair was spiked a rich mahogany brown. One strand of electric blond hair complemented his eyes as well. He adjusted his glasses smoothly with a smirk on his competent lips.
"Nature, naturally." His voice brimming with confidence.
Being one of the few topics I was truly comfortable with, it didn't take too long for the debate itself to outshine the ever-bright glow of pressure and impending embarrassment as I barely noticed others gathering to listen, some breaking off with their own comments of our words.
The man clearly knew his argument. He gave sharp precise information down to a decimal of how many psychopaths were genetically translated. While my side had to be more situation based.
I wasn't used to talking so much, and so intensely, so when I finally spoke the words that broke down his argument, my throat was beyond exhausted. He shook my hand. Doji was his name. And when he heard my voice, he chuckled.
"To think, a philosopher would sway me. Ah, today is a memorable day. Let us trial again, soon, Yugi Mutou." He smiled more genuinely this time, in respect. And I couldn't help but thank myself for having the courage to follow Siegfried's suggestion.
As Siegfried and I started to reflect upon the debate, neither my body, nor brain seemed to process the space around me.
A heated debate had turned very expressive, gesturally. And as Seigfried and I walked towards the refreshments, I neglected to note it as I turned my head to talk to Siegfried.
And in that next second, the glass of a debater knocked abruptly against my shoulder. What could have been avoided turned into a nick of the shoulder, spilling deep red wine over me. Naturally, the man spun around in shock, and started, just as expressively, to apologize for his nonchalant behavior.
Immediately, the sudden contact exploded through my body like frostbite. Freezing myself in my place. I stammered, nausea grasping at my stomach. No. Not now. The panic of knowing I was panicking was suffocating. I shook my head, backing up.
"Ah, it's fine, really. I'm going to go clean up." I turned to Siegfried for barely a second, ignoring his worried 'Are you alright?', and walked for the closest exit from the suddenly tiny room.
As soon as I was out, I ran down the hall, just needing to get away from everything. If I can just calm down, I'll be fine. I'll be fine. There's no need to panic. It was an accident.
But no matter how I tried to calm myself, my instincts grasped onto my vulnerable mind, allowing past trauma to flare up. My heart raced, and white hot pain stabbed into my shoulder, numbing my arm as it went. I just need fresh air. I'll be fine. I am fine.
But in the moment of me very quickly turning the corner, my panic shattered as I ran straight into someone. I stumbled back, and as I became aware of what I did, my body threatened to collapse under me.
"Yugioh, it's your first time here, and already you've managed to get yourself worked up into a mess." I stared up at the man.
Dartz Paradius. I ran into him. Of all people. Of all times. The aching pain of needing to melt into the floor almost made me fall to my knees.
"I-.. I'm sorry. I wasn't looking, I- I just need to.." I trailed off, my mind impossibly overloaded with all five senses.
At this point, the best path for my disoriented mind seemed to be to simply run as fast as I could, out of the mansion, to my car, drive home, and never come out. He must have seen my panicked eyes flick in the direction of a door past us, and he put a hand on my shoulder. That successfully snapped me out of any sort of daze.
"I had been planning to talk to you. Please, sit down. Relax. You seem pale." He was very clearly understanding my state, but gestured to a seat anyhow.
"Uh.. I.." I stammered, my thoughts continuing to race before they snapped.
And like a wild animal running blindly without thought, I dashed past him, opened the door, and very quickly shut it behind me. But what I came very quickly to realize, was that the door was an opening to a closet. A storage closet. I covered my face, sliding against the wall.
My heart was beating so fast, I could hear it, as if it was echoing around in my brain. My entire hands and arms had gone numb, and naturally, my stomach tensed and contracted painfully. The dull pain entered my body, and the ticking creeped in on my reality. I kept my eyes tightly closed, afraid to open them in fear of what I would see. I covered my mouth with one hand, afraid I would start screaming if I didn't.
As I felt a hand place itself of my shoulder, and then shift me until I could feel hands holding my legs to my abdomen in restraint, and then, I did start yelling.
"No! Please.. Please stop.. Please.. Stop.. I.. I won't tell you.. Anything.. No matter what you do.." My yell very quickly faded to an exhausted whisper as I lost the strength I had originally had to fight.
No, I simply sat, my entire body quivering, my stomach still contracting, but the noises and pain starting to fade away slowly. I whimpered softly, before daring to slowly open my eyes.
I mumbled another plea as I realized the host, Dartz Paradius, was the one whom I had just previously screamed at, and tried to fight, heard me, and saw me. He saw all of it.
The utter humiliation that washed over my body was enough to suffocate me. I tried to push the man away, but my effort only ending in his grasp becoming more adamant. I stared into space for awhile I think, not wanting to have to deal with my situation.
My head began to clear and I asked finally, "Why?"
There was no doubt in my mind that this man knew what he was doing. Well, in terms of my state, that is. He probably knew I would run into the closest thinking it was an exit.
"Why?" He murmured, "Why what, little one?"
I shut my eyes, wishing I could melt into the floor, "Please, could you let me go? I n-need to go home.." I whispered, the torment of him forcing me to talk was about enough to cause a wave of tears to well up in my eyes.
"Now, that's not how this works. It is important you stay until midnight, that is the rule of the Paradius Mansion. I understand new places are difficult for you, but I assure you, you are somewhere that had been a safe heaven to all for over three centuries." His voice was soft and calm, dousing the flames of my sensitive, quivering state.
"You're talking like you know me.." I mumbled, staring down, defeated.
"I hand pick the guests of this mansion, anyone unworthy would tarnish the reputation of Paradius, so naturally I make my decisions with meticulous consideration. Your books are particularly astounding for your age, let alone the complexity on the pages. Though it is your behavior and mind itself which I find even more intriguing." He explained, and as expected the man's words glowed through the darkness with an unquestionable intelligence.
I stayed completely still, breathing shallowly. I heard every word he uttered, and understood.. But my mind was elsewhere, not sure what he was getting at. He is searching for something, but I don't understand..
"W-What do you want from me?" I managed, even as I envisioned him wrapping his slender fingers around my throat.
"I very simply want you." He responded.
"I don't know what you're talking about.. But.. At midnight, I could leave here, and never come back. You'd never see me again." I swallowed, narrowing my eyes.
He chuckled, "Oh, I think I will," he pressed down into my neck with his thumb and index finger, "PTSD is a very strange, double edged sword."
My eyes widened, "It makes people crave structure, finality. And yearn to be swallowed up in the contact of others to protect them." He murmured, "You're arching your back into my hand, you seek it."
I didn't notice beforehand, and since I was already humiliated beyond repair, I didn't care. And he was right, of course. The feeling of another person was like ropes tying me to the ground, keeping me stable.
"I'd quite say you won't be able to get this off your mind." He smirked contorting my back as he added more pressure against my throat, only to use his leg to force my spine to arch in compensation.
I felt manipulated like a puppet on strings, and the feeling of my control slipping was both terrifying and euphoric. And yet.
"Please, stop.." I whispered.
He shifted his fingers, and then pressed against the back of my shoulder blades through my formally layered clothing as if it was no more than a single layer of silk. The feeling was strange, slightly painful, and made sore aches seep deeply into my muscles. And I choked at the feeling.
Humiliating. I felt like I could be one of those violins, that Dartz could play so effortlessly. A tear slipped down my cheek, maybe mourning my shattered pride that was fragile to begin with. Or maybe it mourned for something else, knowing that I was trapped. Trapped in my mind with these sensations, long after they end.
I stayed there for another minute before the host slowly released me from my position, but kept me from trying to get up, pulling me down to the cold, unforgiving concrete floor again.
I tensed again, my bones already aching from the cold, and I swallowed when he didn't break the silence. He was waiting.
"..You're a busy man. So, ..Why waste your time with this? With.. me?" I murmured softly, keeping my head down.
"Knowledge is created through experiences, new experience. And experience is priceless. And I quite enjoy the experience I've just had with you. You're what I would call a beautifully destroyed entity. In a world that strives to separate beauty from everything, they don't seem to understand the beauty behind the broken things, the tainted things, the shattered things." He murmured softly, before resting his hand on my forehead.
"A beautiful mind is born with corruption. A flawless vessel is home to the most intriguing secrets. And actions are the portal to your thoughts and feelings. Beauty is disgustingly simple.. Yes, But ruins are complex mazes of vast feelings and thoughts." He murmured, leaning in closer until I could feel the air around me vibrate as he spoke.
His way of talking was both sickening and beautiful. Offensive yet praising. I loved it, and loathed it.
"I'm not yours to-.." I started to speak, but was cut off as I felt a sharp pain bolt though my body.
Dartz had effortlessly started to tighten his hold around the sides of my neck, and yet, I didn't feel like I was choking. Instead, it caused foreign radiations of bittersweet pain. I took in a sharp breath, my hands at his wrist, my muscles both trying to wriggle out from the hold, and grasp onto the feelings tighter. I quivered and jolted, unsure of how to cope with the feelings.
"How does this feel, Yugioh?"
His voice alone, the way he murmured my name.. His tone.. His words.. I couldn't think.
"I.. I don't know.. Both.." I breathed, muttering almost incoherently.
"Both, what?"
"Pain.. It feels.. nice.." I whispered, cringing as the words melted off my tongue with an acidic aftertaste.
The words, he let them sink into my conscience in silence. It felt like any of my resisting will power was shattered and fell to the ground in unsalvageable pieces. I put my hand to my mouth, not believing I let those words, those disgusting words leave my mind and fall off my tongue.
I had just spoken words I wished no one to ever hear.
I immediately shut down, my first defense. As tears streaked my face, I hid behind my hands and bangs. We both knew my mistake. And unfortunately, we both knew one's loss is another's gain.
"Good.. Honesty is such a exquisite trait. It exposes the person's true nature. It exposes the true selfishness, hidden contempt of the human mind." He voice almost seemed toned to praise, as if rewarding me for allowing those words to finally slip, even as tears fell to the floor below me.
And at the moment I felt as low as the floor. I felt defeated, a psychological mess that I hadn't felt in years. And just like that, Dartz stood up.
And as he opened the storage closet again, allowing warm light to seep in, he looked back to me, "Go get cleaned up. That stain is quite unbecoming of you. Turn right. Second door."
And just like that, he was gone. I felt my heart leap out of my chest in a panic, funnily enough, there was no relief. This man had stirred a hurricane up inside me, and knew he was leaving me to ride it out, alone. Because he knew I'd be left needing to see him again.
I stayed there for several minutes it seemed like, before I tried to compose myself, and left, shutting the door gently behind me. I swallowed, gingerly stepping down the luxurious hall two doors to the right. It looked like any of the other doors. Mahogany, engraved.. Flawless. And I slowly opened it.
I peered inside, it looked like any bedroom. Except it was missing a bed, in place of that was a desk and mirror. And one top of the desk rested a neatly folded piece of clothing. I bit my lip, seeing a note on top, and couldn't resist. I walked in the strangely normal room, and picked up the note.
You don't want to be seen how you are now, do you? Throw it away.
~DP
It read in mocking, elegant handwriting. I looked at the stain on my front and side with a dejected frown. How did he manage to see my clumsiness, write this note, place the clothes, and meet me in the hall all within the couple of seconds it took me to run out of the dining hall?
But I had no other choice. I set my other jacket down, and carefully put the new one one. The fabric felt like silk was caressing me, it was amazing quality. It must've cost a fortune.. And I became terrified of even so much as touching it. But I followed the instructions nonetheless, and folded my old jacket, before placing it neatly in the previously empty trashcan.
I sighed, having half the nerve to just stay in this room until midnight, and book it out, leaving the jacket here. But my paranoia got the better, after all, it's rude to be given a gift, and then refuse to have it be seen as it was obviously meant to be utilized.
So I stepped out, and followed my steps back into the dining hall. The murmur and chatter of brilliant minds intermingling made me relax slightly. That is, if I wasn't too busy thinking about what everyone in this room would do if they knew what had happened in the last half hour.
I floated around numbly, and paranoia began to creep in on me. Whenever someone so much as glanced at me, images of them having seen what had just happened tormented me.
"You got a new coat, wow..! It's an Ailases..!" A familiar accented voice exclaimed, and I spun around to face him.
"Uh.. Yeah.." I mumbled, looking away as I could feel Siegfried's curious gaze strangling my resistance under the pressure, "Dartz is letting me borrow it.." I muttered.
"So you got to talk to him, then?" Seigfried's smile grew.
"..S-Sort of.." I mumbled uncomfortably.
"Is something wrong..? You dashed out of here pretty quickly, before." Siegfried had paused before asking.
He asked me if something was wrong..? So many things were so very wrong right now. But I don't think I should ever open my mouth about it.. As I did, my eyes focused in the distance, and my eyes locked with the terrifying intensity of golden aqua eyes. Dartz was staring right at me, and it's like he knows. He stood in the middle of the crowds of people, a divine being among a group of intellectuals.
I breathed in deeply, forcing myself to look back to Siegfried as people covered the gaze between us, "I.. I'm fine."
Siegfried seemed thoroughly unimpressed, but just sighed, "Is it true you were born in Valley of the Kings?"
His next question made me blink, "..Yeah.. I grew up there. For the most part." I nodded, "Why?"
"Oh, it's just things I'm hearing. Someone saw you debating with Doji and remarked you had a very singular gene pool or something.. Genetics aren't my thing. They thought you Egyptian. And I thought it would be very interesting if you really were. And how you got all the way over here.." Siegfried seemed almost to be talking to himself, and I should have guessed he would read in between the lines so much.
Just as I felt cornered, like I had to speak, another voice broke in for me, another intellectual hoping to talk. So while they were distracted, I took a minute to slip away.
I followed satin curtains left open outside of the main room, and was given a beautiful view of greenery, as well as the lake that reflected a waxing moon. The air was frozen, but it felt good in my lungs. I sighed, situating myself onto the edge of the column-chiseled wall railings. I let my feet dangle of the edge, looking down to the two stories beneath me. The night was clear and quiet. I closed my eyes. I would stay like this fore-
A scream broke the natural quiet of the night, as cold hands pushed me forward. When I opened my eyes, I was dangling over the edge of the railing, facing the earth below me over two stories high. My chest hurt with terror of what I thought should have already happened, and let out a choked cry.
"Although the moon surely appreciates you, the mansion gets very jealous if you ignore it.."
The voice spread awareness through my numb limbs again. A hand was closed firmly over my wrist, the only thing supporting me to keep me from falling.. And the voice was oneô I heard no more than an hour ago. It was unforgettably smooth but sharply intelligent.
I wanted to scream in rage, and throw profanities at him for what he was doing, but instead, "Please.." I whispered, "Don't let me fall.." I mewled, on the edge of hysteria.
"An interesting topic, danger is." Dartz murmured, "Every human reacts differently to being in danger.. And even more so when involved with another intelligent species. Though in a panic, many do not think of the repercussions of their choices-"
"Just let go already!" I screamed.
Dartz was quiet, my heart pounded as I waited. The cold concrete never came though, instead, I felt a pressing body of warmth.
I hadn't realized how hard I was shaking until I felt how calm he was. I hadn't realized how much I was sobbing until I heard how quiet he was. I hadn't realized I was clinging to him until I opened my eyes.
I hadn't realized until I opened my eyes that he was murmuring, talking. But the words were rich and foreign. It didn't sound quite like any language I've heard before. But it made me relax my muscles that had tensed to the point of pain.
"Why are you tormenting me?" I whispered, looking up at him.
He didn't answer. He never did. Even after the clock struck midnight, and all of the men and women gracefully walked out into the moonlight, I asked him, 'Why?'
"..Flowers are beautiful.. If you cut them, they will depend on you to keep them alive.. But some people love to watch beauty wither and wilt and preserve them forever."
He murmured that as I watched the other people walk off into the night. But I'm not a flower, I'm a dead sapling that will never grow again. So why me?
..Why me?
