"I'm a Goblin…" - Regular Speech.

'…So what?' - Thoughts.

{Is the Title} - Voice of Heaven Announcement.

Chapter 1: Pure World Denial

Uzumaki Naruto, formerly the Nanadaime Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato, formerly the Sandaime Jinchūriki of Kurama, the Kyūbi no Kitsune and formerly alive, looked around at the place he was standing in bemusement. Not a minute ago, he had died surrounded by his large family at the age of 100, an unheard of age for a Demon Vessel save for Uzumaki Mito, the Shodaime Jinchūriki of Kurama.

Now he was…floating in a white void, not unlike the world he had been in when he had met the chakra clone of his mother during the Fourth Great Ninja War.

"Kaa-san? You here?" Naruto called.

Receiving no answer, he frowned before he realised he sounded almost exactly like he had when he was fifteen. In fact, looking down, he saw he was dressed in the black and burnt orange jumpsuit he had worn at that age…and he had the same body as his fifteen-year-old self too!

"What the heck is going on here?" Naruto muttered.

{Finally!} a voice spoke within his head, I was wondering when you'd get around to asking that!

Jerking his head up, he saw a…white blob thing floating in front of him. It was the size of a medicine ball and was so bright it was hard to look at.

"Who…or what…are you?" Naruto asked.

{I suppose you could call me an angel.} the being said with a sniff. Lights danced over its surface as it 'spoke' to him, {And you, Uzumaki Naruto, are in trouble!}

"Err…I don't see how." Naruto said in confusion, "I am dead, right?"

{Yes, yes, but it is your actions while alive are what I am referring to!} the being shot back, black appearing on it and Naruto got the impression that this angel (whatever that was) seemed to be pretty angry at him for some reason.

"Hey! I was a damn hero!" Naruto protested.

{That is entirely beside the point!} the angel seemed to bristle with anger, {You regularly associated with the Desecrators Orochimaru and Yakushi Kabuto!}

"If by 'associated with', you mean 'we tried to kill each other a good dozen or so times', then yes." Naruto answered dryly.

{You broke destiny when you fought against the demon Mōryō!} the blob continued, {You were supposed to die!}

"Hey, I don't believe in a fixed destiny." Naruto countered, "And he would have subjugated all of the Elemental Nations if I hadn't helped Priestess Shion stop him!"

{And your worst crime of imprisoning the Rabbit Goddess?} the angel challenged him, {There's no denying that you and that friend of yours sealed her away!}

"Uh, yeah, because she wanted to turn everyone in the entire world into hanging fruit on the Shinju!" Naruto said with a glare, "Besides, she wasn't an actual goddess; that was a nickname given to Ōtsutsuki Kaguya by the people of her time!"

{Why you…!} the angel started to turn red.

{Enough!} another white blob appeared next to the first, {******, you have lowered yourself to beneath his level by ranting at him. Shame on you!}

{But ******~!} the first one protested. For some reason, Naruto couldn't hear or understand their names.

"Excuse me, but can someone please fill me in on what the hell is going on here?" he asked in irritation.

{Very well.} the second 'angel' replied. This one 'sounded' more mature than the first. {You have been brought here to answer for your crimes. Ordinarily-} here, it felt like the second blob was glaring at the first, {-you would be dealt with by a panel of angels, but as my compatriot here took matters into her own hands, starting things early and you defended yourself on instinct and without a panel, you must endure trial by life.}

"I'm sorry, what?" Naruto asked in disbelief.

{Basically, you will be reincarnated into another world as a weak monster.} the second angel explained, {You will live your life out there and when you die, you will be brought back here for judgement. If you have lived your life in a good manner that benefits your race, you will be found innocent. If you die early or do not make a difference, you will be found guilty.}

"Hold it, what about Sasuke?" Naruto protested, "He was a part of sealing Kaguya as well!"

{True, but he will be judged by a full panel rather than this summary justice.} the angel replied.

"The Teme always gets the due process." the blond former Hokage grumbled, "And? What happens if I'm found guilty?"

{You'll be cast into purgatory for an epoch, the length to be determined upon your return.} the first angel said snidely.

{On the other hand, if found innocent, you will be sent on to the Pure World to be with your wife and friends.} the second one interjected.

"What the hell…why not?" Naruto sighed, "It isn't as if this is the strangest thing that's happened to me. Can I ask exactly-"

{No you may not!} the first one snapped petulantly.

{It is required to explain everything.} the second angel said reprovingly, {You have said and done quite enough for now, ******, so kindly return so you can be dealt with later.}

With a sniff of disdain, the first angel vanished abruptly.

{She is young.} the remaining angel apologised, {She sees things in absolutes where none truly exist. Now…have you ever heard of an RPG?}

Caught off guard by the apparent non sequitur, Naruto thought back for a moment before replying, "Yeah…I think I played a couple with my grandkids a couple of times. Why?"

{The world you will be reincarnated into will have certain aspects of an RPG game in it.} the angel explained, {There will be levels, stats, skills and quests just like in one. In addition, while you will start as a monster at the bottom of the totem pole, you will be able to 'evolve' into a more powerful monster once you reach a certain level and fulfil certain conditions.}

"Can I ask why a monster rather than a human?" Naruto put forwards.

{It is a test to see if you are capable of sympathising with those you are drastically different from.} the being replied.

"So I'll still have my memories?" Naruto asked.

{Of course. Not much point in testing you if you have no idea who you even are.} was the answer he got.

"OK then…so how do we do this then?" he asked once he memorised everything.

{Merely close your eyes and when you open them again, you will be reborn.} the angel instructed him, {You will be unable to do anything until you fully mature, so you can control the status screen with your thoughts. Merely think 'Status' in order to open it. See you in a lifetime.}

With that, Naruto close his eyes.

Unknown Location

Undetermined Amount of Time Later

Opening his eyes, Naruto saw a rock ceiling partially covered in moss. Evidently he had been reincarnated as a cave-dwelling monster. At least it wasn't as a ghost or something.

He tried to jerk back when an old and heavily wrinkled face appeared above him. The skin was green and the creature's head was bald on top, with a long and straggly beard reaching down to the floor. The ears were pointed and the nose was too.

'Holy crap, a Goblin!' Naruto thought in shock, 'A Goblin Jiji!'

Hang on, this means that he was a goblin as well! Damn, that angel was right; he really was the lowest rung on the ladder. Goblins were usually weak as hell.

"Hmmm…" the aged goblin mused, "As for you…Gobuto…yes, from now on, you are Gobuto!"

EEEEEHHHHHH?! What's with that lame-ass naming sense?! It sounds like some kind of weird foot disease! Damn lazy goblin!

Calming himself down, Naruto recalled that he would be all but helpless until he grew up. How long did it take a goblin to mature into an adult? Given how they were used as cannon fodder in games he had played, probably not long.

'Let's see here…the angel said something about opening a screen of some kind…err…[Status]?'

A blue box opened up in front of him, floating a foot away from his face.

Name: Gobuto

Level: 0 (Newborn Infant)

Race: Goblin

Job: None

HP: 10/10

MP: [Locked]

Strength: 0

Toughness: 1

Dexterity: 0

Initiative: 1

Wisdom: 0

Leadership: [Locked]

Skill Points: 0

Gobuto is a runt.

O…K. That's more than slightly underwhelming. Then again, this body was only a few hours old, if that, so it was hardly a surprise he was weak.

'Lessee…the angel said I have a bunch of stuff…ah! [Skills]!'

The first window closed and another one, orange this time, opened up.

Skills: - [Speak Goblin Language] (LVMAX) {Locked}

- [Gluttony] (LVMAX) {Locked}

- [Instinctive Combatant] (LV1) {Locked}

- [Strength in Numbers] (LV1) {Locked}

- [Precocious] (LVMAX)

- [Take Forcibly] (LVMAX) {Locked}

- [Cunning] (LV1) {Locked}

- [Demon Tribe's Factor] (LVMAX) {Locked}

- [Night Vision] (LV1)

He had eight skills…all but one of them locked. He tried to open them with his thoughts, but nothing happened. He tried to touch them with his stubby little hands, but he couldn't move them very well and it made him really tired.

With a small huff, he mentally closed the screen and almost immediately fell asleep.

Three Days later

Naruto stood as a fully mature Goblin. It had taken him three days, including the first day, to grow to a Goblin adult…not that the size was all that impressive. He was around about the same size he had been as a fresh Genin, maybe an inch or so shorter.

Once he had woken up yesterday, a little jingle-jangle had played and a familiar voice had spoken into his head.

-Flashback-

{Congratulations! You are a fully mature Goblin! Your stats have been altered to reflect this and your skills have been unlocked!}

{You have lost the skill [Precocious] as a result of fully maturing!}

Eagerly, he had opened the skill screen and pressed one clawed finger onto [Speak Goblin Language].

[Speak Goblin Language] (Level MAX)

Known to outsiders as Grobbri, the Goblin tongue is spoken by all goblin-type monsters and even monsters of other races have a working knowledge of it, making it the equivalent of the Trade language of the humans.

Racial Skill

- Permits the user to speak to and understand the speech of all goblin-type monsters without any penalty.

- Adds +10 to any attempt to persuade, intimidate or charm a fellow goblin.

Well, that was fairly standard. He could speak to other members of his own race, big wow. He moved on to the next one.

[Gluttony] (Level MAX)

Unique Skill

Gluttony is the ability to eat anything without harm. Flesh, metal bone or stone, you can eat it without getting so much as a stomach ache. In addition, when you devour a creature or a piece of a creature, you have a chance of stealing one or more of their skills. The more of the creatures you eat, the higher chance you have of gaining a skill from them. Certain parts are rumoured to increase the chances of this, although what parts they might be are unknown.

- Grants immunity to any poison or acid imbibed through the mouth.

- Allows the user to bite through anything as long as it is not alive.

- Allows the user to digest anything he eats.

- Allows the user to gain skills from the prey that the user eats.

Broken! This was a broken skill! Naruto stared in shock at the box and thought, 'Damn, this means I get stronger the more I eat? Chōji would have loved this skill…'

[Instinctive Combatant] (Level 1, 00.00)

Racial Skill

Goblins and Orcs have an instinctive skill for combat, although Orcs tend to be more powerful in this regard due to their size and strength. Nevertheless, both species can enter combat with the crudest of weapons and be effective.

- Grants a +1 bonus to all attacks made by [Improvised] and [Crude] weaponry.

That…was fairly weak, but it was only a Level 1 skill, so that was to be expected.

[Strength in Numbers] (Level 1, 00.00)

Racial Skill

Goblins are infamous for attacking in massive waves, overrunning and defeating better armed and organised troops through sheer weight of numbers alone. To a goblin commander, quantity has a quality in and of itself.

- Grants a +1 bonus to all physical stats per five goblins within a ten meter radius.

Considering how weak Goblins were supposed to be, this was probably a necessity for most Goblins. Naruto…or rather, Gobuto as he was now, wouldn't be like that, thank you very much.

[Taken Forcibly] (Level MAX)

Racial Skill

Goblins are infamous for their poor treatment of women and as a result, have a 50% higher chance of impregnating humans than their fellow goblins.

Naruto didn't like what this skill implied.

[Cunning] (Level 1, 00.00)

Racial Skill

Goblins are generally seen as being stupid, which is quite true. On the other hand, they can display a great deal of cunning…if they live long enough.

- 25% chance of a +5 Initiative and Wisdom boost during combat.

This one was just up Naruto's alley. He always did like being cunning.

[Demon Tribe's Factor] (Level MAX)

Racial Skill

Goblins are rumoured to have been made by human magicians in the distant past using the blood of demons mixed with small amounts of human flesh. Whatever the case, they are regarded as being partly demonic due to their general malevolence and anti-human attitudes.

- All anti-demon effects are half effective against Goblins.

- Able to use all [Demon] restricted items.

That was a cause for concern. Oh well.

[Night Vision] (Level 1, 00.00)

Racial Skill

The eyes of goblins are well adapted to the environment that they often find themselves in…caves, ruins and the Darklands, where light is seldom found.

- Allows the user to see 25% better in the darkness.

Very useful.

Closing the [Skill] window, Gobuto then opened the [Status] window so he could see the difference from what it had been before he had matured.

Name: Gobuto

Level: 1

To Next Level: 150 EXP

Race: Goblin

Job: None

HP: 100/100

MP: [Locked]

Strength: 10

Toughness: 10

Dexterity: 12

Initiative: 10

Wisdom: 11

Leadership: [Locked]

Equipment: Head: None

Torso: None

Arms: None

Undergarments: Filthy Loincloth

Legs: None

Feet: None

R. Hand: None

L. Hand: None

Attribute Points: 0

Skill Points: 10

Gobuto is a newly matured Goblin. Untried, untested and unknown.

OK then. So he had way better stats than when he was a newborn. That was still weak sauce compared to what Gobuto expected a human's stats to be like.

Why was his MP and Leadership locked? He reached out and pressed the [Locked] symbol next to [MP].

[MP is locked until you obtain a magic-based skill.]

OK, that was fair. And [Leadership]?

[Leadership is locked until you become a leader of a group.]

That was fair enough as well. So…what to do now…?

Exercise.

-Flashback End-

He had earned a point in Strength and Toughness from all his exercise the previous day, but he had fallen asleep almost as soon as he laid don on the dirt floor.

He'd have to see about getting a futon or something. Sleeping on the dirt sucked.

"Hey, newbie!" one older goblin yelled at him, "Yeah, you with the scratches on your cheeks!"

Gobuto pointed at himself.

"Yes, you! Go on and do some hunting!" the older goblin snorted, "If you don't hunt, you don't eat anything but caterpillars, moss and lichen!"

Quest Alert!

Daily Quest: I'm Hunting Wabbits!

Team up with another Goblin from your generation and hunt down two [Horned Rabbits] to share between you.

Quest Reward: 100 EXP, 10 SP

Quest Failure: Eat Moss and Lichen for food.

Accept?

Y/N

'Hmm…fresh meat or soggy cave moss…a tough choice, this is not!' Gobuto thought with a snort. He hit the 'Y' key and accepted the quest before calling back, "OK!" to the other goblin.

Immediately, several Goblins had an exclamation mark appear over their heads. It didn't take much brainpower to figure out that those were the goblins with which he could partner up with. He carefully examined each of them to discover something about them.

{Through constant repetition, the skill [Appraise Creature] has been created.}

[Appraise Creature] (Level 1, 00.00)

Allows you to see the stats of any living creature. Unusable on creatures 50+ levels higher than you. Unusable on golems. Data starts off scant, but increases as the level goes up.

Current information displayed: Name, Level, Gender.

Oh-ho! This was interesting!

Gobuto used the skill on several of the goblins and discovered that the ones who had hair were females, which was odd. Female goblins? Who knew?

Goburi - Male, Level 1

Gobuzi - Female, Level 1

Gobuki - Female, Level 1

Gobuseri - Male, Level 1

Gobura - Female, Level 1

Gobuneko - Female, Level 1

Goburyū - Male, Level 1

…that old Goblin…has NO naming sense!

{[Appraise Creature] has levelled up! LV1-LV2!}

'Oho!' Gobuto thought, 'Let's try that last one out again…'

Goburyū

Gender: Male

Level: 1

S: 10

T: 11

D: 12

I: 8

W: 8

'OK, so now I can see their stats.' he thought. After checking the rest again, he determined that Goburyū had the lowest mental stats out of the whole lot of them and was thus unlikely to try and stab him in the back. He vaguely remembered one description of goblins as being untrustworthy as a whole.

"Hey, Goburyū!" he called out to his chosen partner.

"Yeah?" the goblin said as he turned around. Goburyū had a slightly larger head than other goblins and had a slightly vacant expression on his face.

"I'm going hunting. Coming?" Gobuto replied.

A grin split Goburyū's face as he nodded vigorously. He reached down and grabbed a crude wooden club. Not bad.

{Goburyū has joined your party!}

Ignoring the voice in his head, Gobuto led Goburyū towards the cave's entrance. In his mind, he was planning things out. In order to get into the Pure World after he died (again) and see Hinata and his friends again, he had to make a marked difference for the better for the goblins of his tribe.

He didn't really know why this particular trial was selected for him, but it wasn't something he was unused to. He would make a difference…as the ruler of this area!

Gobuto would become the damn king around here!

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Next Chapter: Hunting and Gluttony

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