Well, Bobby died and left his sons behind, reluctantly though.

They mourn him and find a new beginning…with each other.

Now God gives Bobby a chance to keep fighting with them.

Will he take it?

What will they do when Archangel Bobby comes into their lives?

xxxxxxxxxxx

Dean was drunk, not 'I'm so shit faced, I can't walk, Sam!' which is the one where he actually does need Sam to walk him or he'd fall flat on his face. Thank goodness.

The words were bad enough.

They had just done the pyre and were doing the thing they were told never to do. Drinking alone. When you drink alone, you get drunker because it's all there is to do. That and let their grief try to kill them some more.

Sam wished it was all there was to do.

Dean wished it was all there was to do.

Besides washing the ash that used to be their father off their hands.

"You don't get to die on me, Sam. Nah uh, never." Dean was saying and Sam was nodding, hoping he'd pass out soon, but it wasn't likely. Dean never passed out easy, he was one those 'I could drink you under the table' guys and he really could, too. Sam thought fondly.

Of course, they hadn't drank this much in years, so maybe he would.

It hurt to stay awake.

It hurt to breathe, to look around, to ride in the van, and even to move.

Because each movement was missing something, not the fluidity of muscles pulling bone into motion, not the joints enabling the skeleton to move, and most definitely not the ease and flow of the limbs.

It was missing Bobby. Bobby walking beside them. Bobby sitting with them. Bobby arguing with them. Bobby beside them in the van. Bobby, Bobby. No Bobby here, No Bobby there.

'Hey, Martha, There's No Bobby there!' Pun. Dean was making puns, Crap! He did that when he got really drunk.

This pun however hurt to hear. Because it was true.

No Bobby was here and would never be again.

They missed him already.

"No dying, either of us. Not alone at least!" Dean drunkenly stumbled over to him now. "I can't do this without you. Not again."

"Dean…" Sam started to say but Dean put a finger to his mouth, then drunkenly ran its tip over Sam's lips.

"Soft, your lips are soft. Thought they would be. Pictured they would be. Huh, I was right." Dean said face inches from his now. "So handsome. Special. Sacred. Sam is sacred."

"Dean, I'm …" Sam had to make him sleep soon, or his urges were going to get him into trouble here. Being in love with your own brother isn't exactly a good thing and he's pretty sure Dean would kill him if he knew.

"Shhh, let me finish and I'll let you make me sleep." Dean said huffily, he looked at Sam and chuckled, "No, not reading your mind. Don't have to. We can read each other like books, Sam, the big print ones. We ought to be able to by now, don't you think?"

"I know, Dean. I'll listen."

"You died, I fell apart. I made a deal and got you back. I died, you got mixed up with demon blood and demon bitches. I died over and over, and, Sam. You didn't see yourself. You fucking broke, you fell apart, too. Yeah, I remember. Got that back when Cas got your Wall destroyed. Guess it was a parting gift, you know. Double the whammy, double the pain." Dean said softly.

"You killed me, twice or more, yourself, not on purpose, so I get that. I got shot, I got smashed, I got hit by car, I got mauled by a golden retriever, and I choked to death on a sausage link. Swore off them after I remembered that little tidbit." Dean chuckled, "The sledge thing with the wall, that was my favorite. You were out there, Sam. You were psychotic."

"Well, watching you die daily made me that way. I was…" Sam stopped and smiled, "Falling apart. We do fall apart when the other is gone, don't we?"

"Yeah, we do. It's why I'm not doing it again. You go, I'll find a way to follow. I go, well, I guess that's up to you. I can't tell you what to do. You could go on, you probably will, you're beautiful enough to have anyone, sure you'll find someone." Dean mused and they shook their heads. Dean realized Sam thought he was just drunk talking that part. "It's true, Sam, you're the most beautiful man I've ever seen. Hell, ever known. Always have been, always will be."

"What are you saying, Dean?" Sam asked, his heart skipped a beat. What did he mean by that?

"You're my compass, Sammy. When we hunt, there's no definite direction we're headed, Sam. We just follow the newspapers and the stuff we dig up. But I'm never lost, because the truth is, my compass, it don't point to what we're hunting. It points to you. And when you're not there, well, it doesn't point at anything. It just spins, I spin. I just keep looking for direction but I can't find it. Because you're my direction, Sammy, without you there, I have no direction." Dean sighed now, feeling tired now, "You're the same way. You get spinning and screw up. Don't get upset, I do it, too. I screw up."

"We need each other to have a purpose. To have direction. To make our compasses work. They'll always pull us together, magnetic Norths, that's what we are." Dean said sadly, touching Sam's face now, stroking his neck and jaw. His eyes stared into Sam's shiny with tears. Sam felt his own. "I'll always be yours, Sam. It's a sad truth. You're mine. We can have all the chicks, well, you can. I like guys now, have for a month or two." Saw Sam's surprised look. "I slept with a few over the years, but still liked women, but for a couple months now, I just have been drawn to men."

"You know, weird thing. Every man I get with? He looks like you. Might be something wrong with me." Dean cried softly, "In love with my brother, such a perv. Bobby isn't even cooling ash on the pyre and I'm having thoughts of you kissing me and touching me, easing my pain with your body." He tossed the keys to Sam, "Go ahead, Sam, you can have her. Leave if you want, it's okay. You don't have to, I would never act on this, promise. Haven't yet, have I?"

"How long?" Sam asked, his face close to Dean's now, eyes on his, eyes taking it in, tears in green eyes, lips in a line. Sam hated when Dean's lips went thin that way, he preferred them petals, like on a flower. Soft and pink. He wanted to kiss them. Like he always did.

"Which?" Dean asked, leaning closer now. Sam was right there. It was wrong. He just couldn't stop himself.

"Which what?" Sam asked, seeing Dean lean in but not able to stop himself from moving even closer, too. A hand slid down the front of Dean's shirt softly, feeling the hard body beneath, fingering the hem of Dean's t-shirt now.

Dean's hand slipped down and did the same as Sam's.

"How long have you felt this way for me?" Sam smiled. He looked in Dean's face, saw he was serious. He'd been thinking of Sam, too. Sam got hard, the thought of that turning him on now.

"Since I was 20, well, that's when the urges hit. I have loved you since I was 16 or so, maybe before." Dean admitted, his dirty secret. It's why he started fooling around to begin with.

"So if we ever…did this…together, it wouldn't just be sex, would it?" Sam said softly, his lips there, right above Dean's.

"Never. We are different. Sex has no meaning, Sam. But us, we're chock full of meaning. So much." Dean said and sighed. "Would it be wrong of me to need you to kiss me, to take our pain away, mine, yours? To be more than just my brother? The way we could be, if we ignored what others thought, ignored our consciences telling us how wrong it is?"

"No, Dean. It wouldn't. Not at all. With Bobby gone, it's just us now. We could die tomorrow. I guess that was always the case but now it feels like it's more urgent. The Leviathans are out there and all we have are numbers to kill them with, strange but true. I don't want to die not knowing you, not feeling you touch me, not being with you now that I know how you feel about me, too." Sam said and kissed him softly, testing their softness, savoring the whiskey taste on them. He should wait until Dean was sober for this. Sam groaned, "Fuck it!" He kissed Dean harder now, pulling at his shirt buttons, tearing it off his shoulders, pulling up on the hem of Dean's t-shirt, moaning softly as Dean kissed him back; just as hard, just as needy. Dean was pushing Sam's shirt off him and pulling up Sam's t-shirt now, too.

"We wear way too many clothes, Sam." Dean growled as he rushed to pull Sam's shirt over his head, breaking their kiss.

"Yeah, too damn many!" Sam gasped as he pulled Dean's over his too.

Now they were kissing again, laying down and rubbing into each other, hands on each other's crotch, roughly stroking each other. "So huge, Sam, so hard." Dean commented as he sucked on Sam's neck and ear. "You, too." Sam moaned, tugging at Dean's belt and trying to undo it, growling."Fucking Belt, won't come off. Want you!" Dean smacked his hands away and chuckled, "In a hurry, are we, Sammy?"

"Yes!" Sam growled again and Dean moaned as Sam bit his neck and sucked on it, Sam's hands went to his hair and pulled softly as he kissed him again. Now Dean was the one fumbling with the belt and cursing. "Damn belts!" Dean swore and Sam chuckled now. "Not the only one in a hurry, eh, Dean?"

"Shut up, Sam." Dean growled, breaking the kiss and backing up, standing. He pulled his shoes off and tossed them aside, breaking a lamp. They laughed and Sam stood now, pulling his shoes off, too.

"You'd better be worth this, Dean." Sam joked as he tossed a shoes and it bounced off the wall. They undid their pants and shimmied out of them. They had to work them off their ankles but soon they were naked and stared at each other, lust in their eyes, hard from the view now. "Fuck, you're gorgeous!" Sam gasped in awe.

"Damn, Sam, You're beautiful!" Dean stared at his brother now. Not moving.

They stared at each other for a minute then got closer, hands touching their bodies now in slow sweeps, hesitantly sliding the hands lower to touch each other, reverently rubbing them there, bodies moving together now, softly, lovingly now. They kissed each other tenderly now and they got into each other, kissing with such love that they couldn't believe they had never felt this before, this warmth, this perfected feeling, like they had been missing something inside, until now.

"Please, Dean, please." Sam backed up and pulling Dean with him. "Now. Let's make love now." Dean straddled Sam now and kissed him some more.

"Can I…make love to you first?" Dean said softly, he'd dreamt of this so long, wanted this but had never dared consider it actually happening for real.

"Yes, please." Sam nodded and Dean climbed down his body, kissing as he went. "Fuck! Don't touch me there, too close as it is. I won't last if you do." Sam growled as Dean went to suck him, "Just a taste, Sam, promise. But I will do it later, you got my promise on that, little brother."

"Good, cause I'd like that." Sam said smiling but his eyes closed when Dean took the head in and sucked it lightly, "Damn! So good, wanted that for a while, too." Sam moaned as Dean couldn't resist a few slides up and down it, sucking hard. Sam moaned and sighed in disappointment when he stopped.

"More, Sam?" Dean asked concerned, he'd do this more before the other if Sam wanted him to. He liked this part, too.

"Yes! Well, no. Want you inside me first. But later, I'd love you to do that again." Sam admitted lifting his hips, "Only need a little prep, Dean, not my first time at this sex thing." Dean let a finger test Sam's hole, tight but not so much he had to work him open too much.

"More, Dean, you're so much more than one finger." Sam moaned and Dean chuckled, removing it and lubing up three fingers, then inserting one at a time, joining them, then pushing them apart, and moving deeper, thrusting them in and out finding his sweet spot. Sam arched eventually and was thrusting back onto them now, head back and moaning for more.

Dean lubed up and licked his lips nervously, "You sure, Sam? This could wait." He had to ask, it was Sam, not some random lay. He would have just taken them but not Sam, Sam was different. Sam was loved. Dean couldn't treat him like that.

"I'm sure, so sure. Please!" Sam begged and Dean leaned into him, kissing him again, softly.

"I love you, Sam." Dean said looking down into his brother's face, "Not sex with you. It feels like forever, once we do this. Never felt forever before."

"Me either, but I feel it with you, too." Sam admitted, kissing him back, "Make love to me, please?"

"Sammy!" Dean gasped and entered him gently, moving slowly. Soon, they were finding a rhythm, neither new to this kind of sex but new to it with each other, a wonderful feeling filling them now. Love, true love, not the temporary kind but the 'I can't live without having this with you' kind. Their kind. It always had been, just without the sex parts. He realized this and sighed. "We were always like this, Sam, too close to be friends, closer than brothers, but always there, between the lines of everything we've ever said or done, or felt. We just weren't making love; it's the one step we never took."

"True but now we can. We can do it all. I want you to." Sam said, and moaned louder as Dean got moving again and he lost all thought of anything but Dean, Dean being his, him being Dean's. Being complete now, not separate anymore, joined, not by body but in spirit, in their souls, in their hearts. Bothers in name, but not in truth, not anymore. Lovers, Soul mates, and Hunters, together.

Soon they both were moving faster and going at it harder, and so ready to cum. "Sammy! So close, so close…gonna go…please…need you…cum with me?" Dean pleaded and fought his orgasm, not wanting their first time to end with cumming separately but needing it to be together, at least for this part. He stroked Sam as he thrust in, Sam moaning hotly and words beyond him now, his body so in tune with Dean's now.

"Dean!" Sam shouted and came while arching and bowing his back, and his lips kissing Dean hard. Their kiss ate their moans and their words, their bodies worked through the orgasm, thrusting and panting, breathes catching, bodies tightening and such intense feelings spilling through them. It was so intense they forgot to breathe and seemed locked together and it burst from them as their release poured from them as well.

They smiled and crawled up the bed, and got under the covers. "Come here, Dean." Sam chuckled and put an arm around Dean's waist, pulling him into his front to cuddle. "I love you."

"Clingy bitch." Dean teased but snuggled closer, smiling happily. "You're such a girl, Samantha."

"Yeah." Sam sighed, but added, "You make me feel like one, you know? I feel so weak when I'm with you, so tired of pretending not to love you, Dean. You make my heart beat faster and it confused me before this, being around you. Not anymore but, yeah, you made me feel like a girl with a crush. Love you, too, Dean."

"Same here. You always made me feel weaker when you were around. You were like a planet and, somehow, I just revolved around you. All my life, everything I felt and everything good in my life, even the bad crap; most of it revolved around you. I felt stronger when it was just me, but also still weaker; still missed you though. But when I'm with you, I'm even weaker so I play at being stronger; felt stronger when I did that." Dean admitted, "Strange but I don't feel so weak anymore with you, I feel lighter, stronger now."

"So, what are we then, you and I? Not brothers, well, maybe some but not as much, don't really feel brotherly for you, haven't for a while now. What are we, what are we really?" Sam asked, afraid this would scare him off. Dean always ran from the most intense stuff and this? This was the most intense thing they'd ever done. "You want to leave? I'd get it, really I do. This has changed our relationship, we knew it would. Now I'm afraid, so afraid that now that we've done this, and I've given myself to you this way, that you'll leave, run away from it, from 'us'."

"We're Us, Sam. There's no name for what we are, more than brothers, more than lovers, and more tied together than we usually are, that's all. Not leaving you, not leaving my only real shot at happiness, which is here with you. I can't say it doesn't scare me but I can't let it go either. I want to be with you, Sam, always have. I'm not saying this because we drank too much but because I can't do this anymore, this pretending, this trying to make myself what I'm not so you won't notice how I feel, fighting to be a person I'm not. I'm with you, Sam, all the way and to the end of our lives, just yours. It all means nothing if I can't do any of this without you, Sam. Hunting, working, talking, hell, everything. I look across a table at a bar, and I have to see you. I lay on some bed and I have to see you sleeping on the other one. I have to be able to call you and hear your voice. I get hurt or dying, and my first and last thoughts are of you. I don't need a doctor fixing me, I want you to." Dean rolled over and looked into Sam's face now, "My life is all about you, Sam. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not your brother anymore, I get that. I'll be your lover, your mate for life, that kind of thing."

"I'll be yours, Dean. Just like I always have been." Sam said smiling, pulling him close again. "I love you."

"Sam, are you tired?" Dean asked, his stomach growled letting Sam know the reason for the question.

"Not really, mostly very relaxed from what we did just now." Sam admitted by groaned, "Don't want to let you go right now, though. Think I'll keep us in bed for a while."

"How about we order in? Pizza?" Dean asked and groaned too. He had to move to get the money, and make the call. Sam chuckled and solved that problem. He pulled Dean up with him and they leaned into each other as Sam phoned in for the pizza and Dean retrieved his money. Then they lay down again and cuddled, smiling.

Dean, however, had other plans.

"They said 45 minutes, right?" Dean asked and Sam nodded. Dean grinned evilly and kissed down his body now. "So we got time to kill." He bit Sam's neck hard and sucked it, marking him then stroked it with a finger touch. "Mine now."

"I never knew you to be so possessive, Dean." Sam smiled but shrugged, "I like it."

"Just with you, Sammy. Feel so possessive of you now. I won't share anymore." Dean said seriously, "Just us. No one else. No women or men but us with each other. Not the same with you, Sam." He looked down and stopped touching Sam now. "I love you, Sam. You're all I've ever wanted."

Sam touched Dean's face gently now, "You're all I've ever wanted too. Just Us." He pulled Dean up and put his mouth to his neck, biting him, sucking on it, touching it softly. "Now you're mine, too."

"Possessive girl." Dean teased, "I've got a possessive girl in my arms." He liked Sam this way, all his.

"Yeah, but your 'possessive girl' right?" Sam asked and Dean nodded, kissing down Sam's body again. Soon he was sucking Sam hard and moaning with him as he sucked. When he was hard enough, he reached a hand out for the lube. Sam handed it to him. He worked himself open wider with the lube, and put some on Sam. He moved down onto him, going slow, easing himself through the brief burn and angled his hips so Sam could hit Dean's sweet spot. It took a while, Sam was indeed too huge to easily take but he managed to get him all in then moved slowly up and down, and moaned. Damn, Sam felt so good inside him, so full of Sam!

"Please, Sam, move! Make love to me before…" Dean moaned louder now, and lost all thought as Sam thrust up, hard and fast into him, Dean pressing down to meet each thrust with his hips. Sam's hands grabbed his hips and they guided him easily along his shaft. Their rhythm got faster now, Dean arched and his head went back, his hands grabbed Sam's knees and used the knees to move himself harder, and deeper onto Sam now, loud cries of pleasure erupting from them now, incoherent but letting their bodies speak for them now. "Sam…I'm…fuck!...so close, sorry…wanted this to last longer…wanted you for so long…can't…sorry, Sam…feels too good…gonna…gonna cum…Sammy!" Sam was stroking Dean's shaft now in time with their thrusts, Dean felt his orgasms hitting him and tensed all over, his body tightening ever tighter with every one of them. "Please…cum with me?" Dean pleaded again, his head was back and his body arching into that beautiful arc still, his muscles and Sam's rolling together and moving gracefully under their tanned skins.

"Yes, oh, baby, yes!" Sam cried out as his own orgasm poured through him as well. "Dean!" He said at the same time as Dean said, "Sammy!" And they came screaming, and kept thrusting and moving until it was done. Then they cuddled under the blankets again, sated and happy. Someone knocked on the door and they chuckled. Dean got up and pulled on some clothes, sans underwear of course.

"Don't go away." He teased and Sam smiled.

Dean answered the door and paid for the pizza, ignoring the interest in the pizza girl's face for him and shut the door. He missed the surprised look on her face, she had been flirting and he had just shut the door in her face. What was the matter with him?

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Here's your food, Sammy." Dean said sitting the food on the bed and undressing again. He climbed in beside Sam and they ate in silence for a while.

"Hand me a soda." Sam asked and Dean grabbed a can from the cube between the beds. Dean grabbed him one, too. "Dean, I'm not nagging but we do need to discuss something." He bit his lip now, afraid to speak.

"Talk, I'm listening." Dean said, "What is it, Sam?" He felt the drunkenness leaving him gradually and smiled. It hadn't been just drunk talk, none of it. He had meant it; he really was tired of pretending they were normal. They weren't. They knew that. Bobby had known that. Others kind of knew it.

"You're drinking too much, Dean." Sam said nervously.

"So, I'll cut down. Don't worry, Sam." Dean said but was stopped by the look on his face. "What?"

"No, not cut down. Quit. It will kill you, Dean. Don't want you to die on me. Not from that at least." Sam said and sighed, "Not nagging, honest."

"Is that what you want me to do, Sam? Quit drinking?" Dean asked and Sam nodded unhappily. "Okay, as of now, I'm on the wagon. Anything else?"

"Yeah, I want something else, too." Sam said blushing at Dean's inquisitive look. "Something that says we're a…well, a couple, we're together."

"Like a ring?" Dean asked surprised. Sam was the sensitive one so he knew it was something like that. Sam liked symbols. He liked when something held meaning behind it and wanted something to convey that meaning. He got that stuff. Dean pulled off his ring, his silver ring. And put it on Sam's finger. "This okay?"

"Dean?" Sam got that soft look in his eyes, his face lit up but his tongue tripped over itself.

"My ring. My Man. You wear that and you are mine." Dean said smiling, touching his face now. "I'll get something later. You were the one that likes the whole symbolic thing, I never got it." Dean eyed the man happily and kissed the ring on his finger. "Don't take it off or I'll glue it on you."

Sam undid his leather bracelet he always wore and tied it onto Dean's wrist. "Now you're mine, too. You don't get to take that off either. It's not that it's symbolic so much as the only way we could ever be…well, married. It would never be accepted but we are with each other now, forever. So why not marriage or having something like they get. I want that!" He kissed Dean softly now, then harder. Dean kissed him back and they were suddenly together, bodies touching and rubbing. The Pizza box, now empty, fell to the floor.

They got lost in their lovemaking again and cuddled afterward, Sam in Dean's arms this time, his head in Dean's neck, fingers stroking every inch of skin they could reach.

"You think Dad knew, how we felt for each other, I mean?" Dean asked and Sam thought about it.

"Maybe. He did separate us after a while. Part of why we fought so much. I thought he was trying to take you away from me, I suppose." Sam admitted.

"Me, too. Always leaving you behind, taking me on hunts. He probably sensed it or something. Not so much when we were kids though. Mostly as teens really." Dean admitted and chuckled, "Bet Bobby knew. He didn't miss a thing."

"Yeah, he probably just didn't say anything. He loved us too much to say anything." Sam said softly and Dean looked down to see him crying a little. "I miss him, Dean."

"Me, too, Sammy." Dean said crying a little himself. "But having you with me this way now? It helps. It doesn't hurt so much when we're together this way, Sam." It should. It should still be tearing them apart but having each other this way, in this new love way, it healed it some, kept the pain at bay. Its light fought back the darkness that losing Bobby had created in their lives.

"Dean, I want to quit…after we stop them, that is. The Leviathans." Sam said sighing and Dean looked surprised. "He left us the yard. We can build something, live there, be ourselves. No more death and die missions. We can help hunters like he did. We don't have to keep doing this the rest of our lives, Dean."

"I'd like that. So tired of saving the world. Let someone else do it next time. I could see myself doing what Bobby did. He trained us at it all our lives. We'd be good at it." Dean admitted, but left out 'But we may not make it out of this alive to do it.' They would make it out, and safely, too. He'd make sure of it.

"I love you, Dean." Sam said falling asleep now, his muscular arm around Dean's waist now. Smiling happily.

"Love you, too, Sammy." Dean said and fell asleep, too. His own muscular arms holding Sam as he slept now. Also smiling happily.

They didn't see the ghost at the foot of the bed, gazing fondly down at them, smiling crookedly, his red hair in a blue trucker cap, his eyes sparkling happily, and his scruffy beard in need of a trim. "Idjits, it's about time you did something to make yourselves happy. Took you long enough." He smiled and vanished with a soft, "Love you, boys."

Neither boy saw it and neither knew he'd been there but they still whispered, "Love you, too, Bobby." Like the loving sons they were.

They wouldn't remember this but Bobby would.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

He had a meeting with God in a bit.

And God had a surprise for him. Or so Gabriel said smiling.

Bobby wondered what it could be.

He went into the throne room in a ball cap and flannel, worried.

He came out in white pants and a white jacket with powers and wings, and an archangel sword.

And a mission.

He flew down to the motel and grinned happily.

He was returning to his boys.

He just hoped he didn't scare the daylights out of them.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bobby joins them next chapter, honest. I look forward to that reunion, don't you?

Please review.