AN: Hi there! It's funny that when you are writing exams you are struck with so many ideas (or maybe that's just me). I have no idea where this story came from…I think I was listening to too many depressive songs and I have a theory that I might be going crazy from studying too much. Besides that, I wanted to try something with a different princess and a different set of circumstances.
Just a one-shot for now, but I might elaborate later...I apologize for any OOCness. Please read and tell me what you think!
Warning: End game spoilers
Disclaimer: I don't own Fable or any of the characters.
Forever and Always
Erica sat at her mahogany desk, working through the never-ending stacks of paper in front of her. She was reading through a particularly boring tax state when there was a loud rap on the door.
"Come in," she called, not bothering to turn around. She heard the door creak open and the footsteps of someone entering the room.
"Please tell me that you're not here to complain yet again, Hobson," she sighed, assuming that the footsteps belonged to her rather annoying aide. What I won't give to get Jasper back, she thought wistfully. "Because if I hear one more suggestion on how closing down the Academy would fill the already overflowing treasury, I might just feed you to a balverine."
"Is that anyway to greet an old friend who so happens to be a devilishly handsome former captain?" said the teasing voice that she never expected to hear again. She jumped up and whirled around, causing a few papers to tumble to the floor.
He looked exactly the same as the day when he left. Blond hair, artfully tousled, clear blue eyes twinkling with mirth and that roguishly handsome face pulled into an arrogant, yet charming grin.
"Ben," she said simply. Her voice conveyed absolutely no emotion.
"Hey, Princess," he said with that infuriating grin. He was always the only one that she had allowed to call her "Princess", even though she hasn't used that title in about five years.
"What are you doing here?" she snapped.
"Can't I visit my favourite monarch without a cross-examination?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"Not since you left for five years without any warning or so much as a letter to let me know that you haven't been killed yet," she replied icily, trying to stop the tears from falling.
You left, you bastard. You left me, she added silently.
He had the decency to look sheepish for a moment. "Yeah, that wasn't my best move," he said, running a hand through his hair.
"What do you want, Ben? I have a lot of work," she sighed and turned back to her work. She heard the thud of his shoes three times before she felt him slip his arms around her waist and turned her face him. Before she could argue, his lips were crushing hers as he kissed her with so much passion that she feared that she would faint. Avo, she'd missed him. How many nights had she woken up shivering from the cold, wishing that he was there to comfort her like he'd used to?
She woke up, drenched in cold sweat from yet another nightmare. Since Walter's death she'd been having the same nightmare every night. A shiver ran down her spine as she remembered Walter's face before he passed away.
Silent tears started rolling down her cheeks as she sat up and pulled her knees to her chest. She was in this position for barely a minute before a set of familiar arms closed around her.
"Hey, it's okay. It's just a dream," Ben whispered as he pulled her toward his chest. "It's alright."
"Why did he have to die, Ben? It's all my fault," she sobbed. "If he hadn't been in that cave with me, if I'd helped him earlier…" She broke off as a huge sob tore through her.
"It's not your fault, Rica. You did everything you could," he comforted, gently stroking her back.
She pulled away to look at him. "I saved everyone in Albion, but I couldn't save one of them that meant the most to me."
He kissed her gently. "Rica, Walter knew the risks. It was just like with Swiftie. Sometimes you just have to accept that they're gone and go on with your life, trying to do justice to their memory."
"What did I do to deserve you, Ben?" she asked, snuggling into his arms.
"Well, you happen to be incredibly gorgeous and I had no other immediate offers, what with you acting like a jealous stalker," he joked and she could see the glint of his vexing smile in the dim light.
He kissed her gently on her head before holding her even closer. "And it just so happens that I love you, Rica. Forever and always."
"Forever and always."
Finally, Ben broke away and looked at her with that same smile. "I want you, simple as that," he stated and shot her a wink.
She pushed him away. "You can't, Ben. You ended what we had the day you left."
The faint sunlight streamed into her windows, causing her to wake up. She rolled over and was surprised that Ben's comforting weight was missing. With a start, she sat up and glanced around the room. His soldier uniform was still on the floor after their more…amorous…activities the previous night.
Now that she thought about it, it was strange that Ben had slept with her the previous night. She'd been having the feeling that they were drifting apart. One day he'd stopped being the chatty, optimistic man he'd always been and started avoiding her. When he'd shown up at her door the previous night, she'd been so happy to see him that she didn't question it at the time.
Suddenly, it hit her. "That bastard," she hissed and threw on her nightgown. It must have been quite a sight as the queen of Albion, wearing nothing but a satin nightgown ran through the castle to the barracks, her hair in disarray and a scowl on her face.
Her fears were confirmed the moment she broke open the door. Ignoring the lack of clothes, the proof that he was really gone was things like that his Auroran beads that she'd given him were gone.
Letting out another stream of curses, she teleported to the Sanctuary. After throwing on a set of clothing, she teleported to the Bowerstone docks.
She scanned the still quiet dock. Sure enough, she spotted his blond head near the benches where people were waiting for the next boat.
"Ben!" she cried, trying to keep her voice from breaking. He whirled around and looked at her, his eyes widening.
"Princess! What are you doing here on this dreary morning?" he asked lightly, coming closer. Despite his tone, she could see the panic and shame in getting caught in his eyes.
"I could ask you the same thing," she retorted, crossing her arms.
He looked to the ground. "I'm not cut out to be a general, Rica. I want to see the world," he muttered, dropping his cocky attitude for once.
"Is this about what we talked about the other night?" she asked, her blood chilling. Had she scared him off?
He shifted his gaze to her face and gave a shrug. "Partly."
"Are you running because I told you that the advisors are expecting me to marry soon?"
"You deserve someone better. You deserve someone better than a two-bit scoundrel," he replied.
She grasped his hand, pleading with her eyes. "I want you, Ben. I love you." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "You promised you wouldn't leave."
"I'm sorry."
"When did this go wrong, Ben? When did you stop loving me?" she asked quietly.
His calloused hand cupped her chin gently and his blue eyes were burning with intensity. "I still love you and I will, forever and always."
"Then why are you leaving?"
"Because I love you." The boat signal rang through the dock, sounding the five minutes before its departure. "I have to go." He pulled her against him and kissed her softly.
It was over much too soon.
"Please…don't leave me alone…" she pled, grasping his hand even tighter. As she said those words, the skies opened up and a torrential downpour started.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, the rain almost drowning out his voice. Then, he was gone.
She stood in the rain for hours. After the rain had started to slow down, she returned to the castle, shut the door and fell against it, streams of tears flowing over her cheeks.
"Ben, I thought I knew you. I thought you loved me, but you left…" she started, catching her breath.
"Rica…" Ben began, but she cut him off.
"I waited for a letter, a package, anything, just so that I know that you're alright, but none came. You said forever and always, but it's clear that you didn't mean it."
"You cut your hair," he remarked suddenly.
She looked at him, startled. "What?"
"You cut your hair. Why?" he asked quietly.
She fingered the chin-length strands. "I don't know. You said that you liked my hair long and when you left…I didn't want to be reminded of anything about you, so I cut it. Cutting it also made me feel like I was giving you a reason to leave because there sure as hell wasn't anything else I did wrong."
"I told you that it wasn't your fault. It was mine," Ben countered.
"Was it really, Ben? There had to be a reason that you forget your promise to stay with me," she said, crossing her arms.
"I didn't deserve you, Rica!" he exclaimed and threw his arms into the air. "Do you know how it felt watching those nobles staring at you as you walked past them, knowing full well that they were ten times more perfect for you than me?"
She looked at him, disbelief flooding her features. "I loved you, Ben! You were all I ever needed! I told you that you were all I wanted and I meant it."
"Then why did you tell me about what the advisors wanted if it didn't mean that you wanted me to leave?"
She felt the tears build up in her eyes. Was all that heartache due to a huge misunderstanding?
"Ben, I told you because I hoped that you would realize that I wanted you to ask you to marry me," she said softly.
Ben took a step back, his expression filled with shock. "What? You…you didn't want me to leave," he breathed.
Erica shook her head. "Not for an instant."
They stood like that for what seemed like forever. Finally, he surged forward and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close. "Oh, Rica. I'm so sorry. Avo, I've been an idiot for believing that you didn't want me," he whispered into her hair.
She clutched his shirt in balled fists, holding him as close as she could. "Ben, you leaving was the worst thing that could have happened to me. I spent nights crying myself to sleep, wondering what I did wrong," she muttered.
"You never did anything wrong, Rica. I can't believe I wasted five years we could have had together." He pulled away for her and looked her in the eye. "Can we…could we try again?"
The tears she'd been keeping back spilled over her cheeks. "I'm so sorry, Ben. I'm so sorry," she choked out, stepping away from him.
Concern washed over his face. "What's wrong, Rica? Did something happen?"
"I'm engaged," she blurted out as a sob ripped through her body.
The concern quickly changed to horror. "What? When…why?" he stammered.
"It happened a month ago. Though I hated you, I kept waiting for you to come back, but…I couldn't anymore. The people wanted me to marry, considering the…circumstances," she said, looking away.
"What do you mean?" he asked hesitantly.
She opened her mouth to reply, but she was interrupted by two flashes of brown hair tumbling into the room, followed by a harrowed looking nanny.
"Mommy, Daniel says that girls can't be Heroes!" her little girl exclaimed, clutching her leg.
"Not true. I said that boys make the bestest Heroes!" the boy interrupted quickly, trying to backpedal.
"Sorry, your Highness. I didn't realize they could run so fast," the nanny apologized, looking embarrassed. "I didn't mean for them to interrupt."
"It's no trouble, Wendy. I'm always glad to see my two little darlings." Erica crouched to look her two children in their startling clear blue eyes. "Daniel, don't forget that Grandmother Sparrow was the greatest Hero in the history of Albion. And Elizabeth, sometimes you need to ignore your brother or at least realize that he's trying to rile you up." She shot a glance at Ben. "Believe me, I know how it feels when someone is trying to get a reaction out of you."
"Hey, it was fun to rile you up," Ben cut in, a huge smile on his face. Only Erica knew him well enough to recognize the realisation and shock in his eyes.
"Yes, well, I made my point. Why don't you two go play outside? I'll be right down," she said to her children, getting to her feet.
"Okay!" they cried in unison and ran out the door. She closed the door carefully, trying to postpone the inevitable storm. Finally she had to turn around and she saw that Ben's entire face was filled with shock.
"Why…why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.
"How could I have told you? I had no idea where you were. Ignoring that fact, I didn't expect you to drop your little adventure to settle down and help me raise our children," she replied, wringing her hands. She couldn't stop an accusatory note from creeping into her tone. "You certainly didn't seem eager to stay."
"When did you find out? How far were…" he trailed off.
"I was already four weeks late when you left." She walked to the window, turning away from him. "Do you understand now? Despite allowing prostitutes on the streets, the child labourers and exuberant taxes during Loghain's reign, people were appalled by an unmarried queen with two children out of wedlock. I tried to postpone it, but eventually, I gave in. Besides, Beth and Dan deserve a father."
She heard Ben coming to stand behind her. "Just like I deserved to know, Erica. I deserved to know that I fathered twins. Where do they think their father is? Did you tell them that I abandoned them?" he said quietly, the anger evident in his voice.
She turned around and looked him in the eye. "They've never asked. They're still too young to understand that everyone has a father and a mother. However, it's only a matter of time."
"So you thought it a good idea to get engaged to some noble?" Ben accused.
"What did you expect me to do for five years? I didn't know when you were going to come back, or if you were ever going to come back," she retorted.
Ben gripped her hand and looked at her earnestly. "Despite the fact that I'm furious right now, somehow I still want you. Avo, I don't know if I want to yell or kiss you," he said through gritted teeth. "Can you at least tell me who it is?"
"Sebastian Wilkins. You don't know him," she replied softly.
"Do you love him?" he asked suddenly, still not releasing her hand.
She looked away from his piercing gaze. "He's…good to me."
A calloused hand gripped her chin as he forced her to look at him. "Do you love him?" he asked again, his eyes searching for something in hers.
"No," she said eventually. "I'll never love a man like I love you."
Suddenly, he went limp. His hand dropped uselessly to his side and he sagged against the huge desk. "How could I have been so stupid? I could have had everything. The woman I love with every fibre of my being, two beautiful children…" she could barely hear him say. "And I threw it all away because of my stupid insecurities." He looked at her and she could see that his eyes were filled with grief. "Do you know what the worst thing is? There's absolutely nothing I can do to get it back."
"Ben…" She had no idea what to tell him. Should she tell him that she dreamt of the moment he would come back for every night since he left? Should she tell him that she would gladly throw away everything if it meant that they could be together?
"I have to go," he said suddenly and got to his feet. "It'll be better for you if I just disappear again."
Sudden impulse made her grab his arm and turn him to face her. Before she knew what she was doing, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth. She tried to tell him everything that she couldn't say with her words.
After his initial shock wore off, he responded with equal fervour. His arms enveloped her as he pulled her close, almost crushing her slight form. His tongue darted into her mouth almost immediately, exploring the familiar territory he'd left behind. She felt a shiver run up her spine as his rough fingers ran through her short hair, causing all kinds of memories to jump at her.
For the first time in for what seemed like forever, she felt complete.
Finally, be it from lack of air or a sudden return of common sense, she pulled away to look him in the eye. "For what it's worth, I also wished we could have had a happy ending," she whispered, her lips swollen from his kisses.
He ran his thumb along the will lines on her temple. "I love you, Rica. I hope he makes you happy," he said sadly. "Just remember, I'll always be waiting."
"Don't tempt me. If I had my way, I'd grab my kids and run away with you right now," she said with a forced smile. "I'm sorry for the way things turned out."
"Me too. I mean it, Rica. I'll love you, forever and always."
"Forever and always."
oOoOoOo
AN: Oh my word…Ben seems OOC, but given the circumstances, I think he might react this way…maybe. Damn you exam stress!
Anywhoo, please let me know what you think!
