W h e n Y o u ' r e H a t e d...
By: Rhiannon Drew (chickenvilla@wolframandhart.net)


DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters from Horatio Hornblower; all rights belong to C.S. Forester, the Hornblower production team, Meridian Entertainment and the A&E Networks. For entertainment only, no infringement intended. Please don't sue.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is set right during "The Mutiny", but before all that crazy shite with Captain Sawyer falling into the hold could happen. Specifically, it happens right before we see Sawyer coming aboard the Renown in Plymouth, and literally -- the scene at the end doesn't even belong to me, because it's actually what happens in the real thing. I'd suggest watching that scene after reading the story, if you really want a feel for it. Also, thanks so, so much to Andromeda and Jan for the fabulous betas -- you were infinitely helpful, and I'm in your debt forever! Other than that... Well, this is your last warning: If sexual interactions between members of the same sex disturb you, do not read. If a little bit of good, plotless, ol' fashioned smut disturbs you, do not read. If you're getting impatient and just want to move ahead, please do. Tell me what you think at chickenvilla@wolframandhart while you're at it, would you?

*****


"Shore leave, Mr. Buckland, is not an excuse for a holiday," Captain James Sawyer said, levelling the quiet-natured Lieutenant with a cold stare. "I warn you not to treat it as such." Sawyer's glare easily took in the other officers on deck as well, but it was Buckland that his attention moved back to when the First Lieutenant shifted uneasily, made visibly uncomfortable by his Captain's menacing presence.

Sawyer's distaste had a way of creeping over everything; it was a black cloud not unlike the one that had cheated the three Lieutenants out of their shore leave in Plymouth in the first place, while the Captain reported to the Admiralty there. Second Lieutenant Horatio Hornblower was very much aware of Sawyer's dislike of him and Lieutenant Archie Kennedy, but he just didn't see why the Captain had it in for Buckland. The First Lieutenant could sometimes be a little on the foolish side, yes, but he was a good man, and a dedicated officer. Horatio didn't know why the Captain didn't like *him*, either, but at least Buckland had never done anything to truly anger him, not even inadvertently. Why did louts like Hobbs and Randall get to go on leave with the other lucky few while the rest of them remained behind?

"So, gentlemen," Sawyer was continuing, "I expect to return to you in a week and find my ship in the finest condition; if anything is not to my liking, you will answer for it! I do not tolerate idleness on my ship, whether at sea or at port. Is that clearly understood? Mr. Hornblower? Mr. Kennedy?"

The directness of that statement almost made both Horatio and Archie flinch, but they managed to keep their faces as masks regardless. "Aye, aye, sir," they chimed in unison, fighting to keep the ire out of their voices. There was no point in even trying to argue.

"Mr. Buckland!"

Buckland actually jumped in surprise, but he still gave a cursory nod. "Sir?"

"Do not think that does not include you."

"Of course not, sir."

Sawyer gave him a bored look, but didn't stop to clarify whether that was just what he thought of his First Lieutenant. "Your watches are to be done as if I were right here on the ship, do I make myself clear? This goes for all three of you. If I find that anyone was slacking in their duties for even a moment, there will be hell to pay for it, and that is a solemn promise."

The Lieutenants gave their acknowledgement, strained though they were, but Sawyer was already moving towards the guardrail of the Renown, where Randall and Hobbs were already climbing down into the jollyboat waiting beside the ship.

"Plymouth awaits," Sawyer announced, following the two men over the side. A moment later, those on deck could hear the Captain berating some poor soul for something already.

It was only as Horatio and Archie were forlornly watching the jollyboat on its way to shore that the crew dispersed to go about their business. Buckland, looking a little paler than usual, even seemed uncertain if it was safe enough to make his way over to his fellow officers.

"That went well," Kennedy commented, mildly.

"Er... yes," Buckland answered, frowning. "Perhaps a little better than usual."

Kennedy rolled his eyes over Buckland's response -- obviously, he hadn't intended for his sarcasm to warrant one -- but the older man didn't notice.

Horatio, smiling tightly lest he actually laugh at his friend's antics in front of his senior, just heaved a sigh. "A week," he murmured, sadly. "What a welcome break that would've been."

"Come now," Buckland said. "No use crying over spilled milk. I'm sure the Captain's choice to keep us here was a perfectly informed decision. No doubt, he had his reasons; it is not our place to question them." He was met by two blank stares, obviously of men who thought otherwise, but he kept speaking as if they were nevertheless in agreement. "Well, then. I suppose it would be in order to decide who takes the first watch, hmm? Would you oblige, Mr. Hornblower?"

"Aye, aye, sir," Horatio replied, dipping his head in a polite nod.

"Good of you, sir. I shall therefore take the last watch of the day, and Mr. Kennedy may take tomorrow's morning watch. From there, we can continue similarly, with Mr. Hornblower after him and so on. Does that suit you both?"

"Yes, sir."

"Very good." Offering a smile, Buckland turned and left, heading below decks for whatever it was Buckland did when he wasn't on watch.

He was barely out of earshot when Archie gave a frustrated growl. "Remind me what it was we did to cheat ourselves out of getting leave for a week?" he wondered.

"I wish I knew," Horatio said. "Whatever it was, it's gotten us this whole bloody ship practically to ourselves for seven days."

"Joy."

"My thoughts exactly, Mr. Kennedy."

"Oh... I was being serious."

*****

Horatio's lips were the softest in the world, more warm and more full than any he had ever before felt. Archie was sure of it. They were always so pliant beneath his, always yielding to his touch as much as they sought out more. He was addicted to kissing Horatio the way some men were addicted to the drink, though Archie was quite sure he and Horatio were very much addicted to each other.

A little part of Archie's mind registered the sound of Horatio's hands fumbling behind him with the knob on the wardroom's door, attempting to turn it enough to close the wooden door without slamming it or breaking away from his best friend's lips. Trying to cooperate long enough to get the door shut, Archie pulled away with a tiny, good-natured grumble and pressed his mouth instead to Horatio's jaw. Able to move his head, Horatio looked over his shoulder slightly and slowly eased the door closed. "Ah... sorry, Archie," he murmured. "Where were we?"

"Aren't you glad Sawyer dislikes us enough to have left us on board?" Archie asked, wryly, as Horatio's hands once again found his hair and guided his face back for another kiss.

The other Lieutenant only made a distracted sound of acknowledgement in the back of his throat, while Archie grinned against his mouth and tugged him backwards towards the windows and the makeshift benches, which had been built in below the frames. Unceremoniously, Archie sat down and took Horatio with him, settling himself beside the younger man without losing contact with Horatio's mouth.

"This is certainly not what I'd had in mind when the Captain announced leave," Horatio said breathlessly, against Archie's lips.

He was grinning, as if the Captain's leaving had really had anything to do with what they were doing; it was only the *where* that had been affected. It was nice to be able to get comfortable in the wardroom, true, but even if the Captain *had* been present on board -- he had a way of scaring them out of being over-bold -- there were enough empty storerooms Horatio and Archie both knew of to take over for a little while.

Archie liked to joke that they were just working their way up. First, there had been the Indefatigable, with her cramped, dark corners on the gundeck, or a spare moment or three for a quick romp in the hold when no one was around. On the Renown, Archie and Horatio each had their private cabins that could actually fit more than one person inside -- a luxury more convenient than they had first realized, so long as the candles were guttered and they were almost completely silent. To top it all off, no one had bothered to question either of the young Lieutenants when they had set off in search of unused rooms. There was one not far from the ship's main hold, a tiny room barely six feet tall and five feet across. Horatio suspected it had once been a spare arms magazine, but someone had started tossing scraps of old or tattered sails in there at some point instead. Neither of them minded; ruined sails provided a more comfortable bed than a bunch of stored weapons ever would.

If their forbidden dalliances -- things that were becoming more and more frequent between them practically with every passing day, or so Horatio was noticing -- had been right under everyone's noses before, this was practically waving in front of their faces. He was still as concerned with getting caught as he had been the first time they'd discovered what a world of possibility lay behind a few innocent kisses and tender caresses, but as Archie often pointed out, that was only half of the excitement. A little part of Horatio accepted the fact that he was too passionate about his lover -- oh, forget that; he was in love, and he damned well knew it -- to stop himself from coming back, no matter how high or low the thrill of the risk was, but he knew Archie was nevertheless right in what he said.

"Can you imagine what they would say if they knew what we were up to?" Archie asked, incredulously. "It's obvious what they would do, but even just trying to picture the looks on their faces is too much. Buckland would have an absolute *fit*. It'd be hilarious, don't you think, Horatio? Well, it isn't right to joke about that, but... nevertheless."

The younger Lieutenant found it distracting when Archie caught him in another deep kiss, though his mind kept circling around their situation, sending a thrill down his spine as much as it turned his stomach thinking about it too much; that made him pull back a tiny bit. "You don't think we're pushing our luck, do you? We aren't taking it a little too far?"

Archie smiled at him, though Horatio couldn't be sure of whether he was trying to be comforting or a little devil. "Are you complaining, Mr. Hornblower?"

Shooting his friend a look, Horatio leaned in to steal another quick, chaste kiss, assuring Archie of his heart and body's position on the matter, even if his mind was being a little skitterish. "Indeed I am not. However..." Archie's eyebrows raised questioningly. "... I'd had plans to share a deep, meaningful conversation with you..." Archie groaned at the humour, and another grin split Horatio's face, part of it relieved that his nervousness hadn't overtaken him completely. A little more confident of himself, he winked. "This is probably more fun, even if I admit that I feel like some young lad who has snuck away from his classes to catch a few stolen kisses from an older girl out behind the schoolhouse..."

"You never did that," Archie said dryly.

"No, you're right. I never did. I imagine this is what it would've been like, though."

"If I were a girl."

"Aye, there is that." They were both chuckling through their next kiss. "But I am glad that you are not."

"So am I."

"But I also can't help but note that they never would've hung a schoolboy for sneaking away with a girl if he got caught." He frowned suddenly, cursing his own damn mouth.

"Horatio..."

"All right, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Horatio tried to continue. There was a moment where his mouth moved... but no explanation came out. Finally, he managed, "I just keep expecting someone like Buckland to come bursting through that door at any moment."

"You know that won't happen," Archie reminded him, gently. "Buckland's on his watch right now, and I'd wager that Sawyer's little speech has him intimidated enough to keep him there no matter what -- if last night was any sort of example, he won't even be taking his supper." Horatio knew he must've looked a tad disbelieving, for the blond man sighed after a moment and reached out to caress his cheek. "We can move to the storeroom, though, if it'll make you feel better."

The offer was appealing, but not for enough of the right reasons. Horatio wrinkled his nose as he weighed the good against the bad. They would more than likely not get caught in the storeroom, yes, but... "There isn't much fun in that," he said, weakly. He flushed at how pathetic this internal conflict sounded to his own ears.

Archie glanced away for a moment, looking in the direction of the door, and the only things that told Horatio he wasn't trying to hide irritation were his fingers, still lightly stroking Horatio's face. Then, with a knowing grin that again made Horatio wonder what he was up to, Archie got to his feet and grasped his hands to make him stand, also. "I think there might be a solution to our problem."

"And what, pray tell, would that be?"

Archie didn't answer until he had guided Horatio back to the door, at which point he flashed a smile and playfully shoved his friend back against the hard wood. "Something neither of us remembered in our haste to get into the room, I think."

"What are you talking about--"

He found Horatio's hand again, and closed it around the bolt on the door. Horatio's face brightened immediately, like a sudden sunrise. Impulsively, he kissed his lover hard on the mouth, feeling the older man fumbling with him to slide the bolt into place through the kiss.

"More subtle than a sign, yet just as effective at keeping people out," Archie said, when the lock clicked shut to both of their ears.

"We really ought to pay attention to that next time," Horatio murmured, offhandedly.

"*Next* time?" Archie echoed. "You have not even allowed me to have my way with you now, and already you've begun planning for the next shore leave. You are truly unbelievable, Horatio. Yet, it is unlike you not to take one thing at a time..."

"Well, then, what did you have in mind?"

Archie's face darkened at the purring, teasing note that slipped into Horatio's voice, and he drew his friend up into a lingering kiss. "You can be a devil sometimes, you know that?"

Horatio frowned. "I... am never myself around you, Archie."

"I think you are."

That was just it, Horatio thought, as he pulled Archie closer, to once again, with renewed intensity, capture his lips. He never felt completely sure of himself around his lover; a kiss could banish the protective walls he had build up around himself -- walls he sometimes found necessary for a life in the Navy -- and it threw him off balance, surprising him... Or maybe it was just that it balanced him out more than he was used to, and that caught him off guard with a sense of rightness he was unaccustomed to feeling in himself. The flirtatious, playful youthfulness seemed as much a part of him as the serious, sometimes cold Lieutenant Hornblower did, and he wondered how he had ever distinguished between the two sides of himself before Archie had come along.

"Horatio..."

He snapped out of his thoughts, almost violently within his own mind, to find Archie looking at him expectantly. "What?"

"What have I told you before about thinking too much about things?"

"*Am* I thinking too much about something?" he asked in confusion, honestly not comprehending. Alright, he knew was guilty of contemplating a little overmuch about *something*, but it wasn't as if he had gone out of his way to show it... Or had he? Sometimes he lost track of what he was doing when something was on his mind; it was a dangerous habit, surely, especially in the right kind of situation. Somehow, Horatio felt like he had encountered one such situation here -- when Archie wanted attention, he didn't like getting no for an answer -- even if he had no idea what he'd done.

"Yes, I am quite sure of it," Archie said, matter-of-factly. His voice was flat enough to seem matter-of-fact, anyway. "You just stopped."

"Stopped? Stopped what?"

"Stopped everything, for starters."

"You're growing impatient in your old age," he answered lightly, with a nervous chuckle that wasn't completely forced.

"I'm nigh on a year your elder," Archie deadpanned. "Old age has nothing to do with it; I was born this way."

"Well, excuse me for not catering to your--"

"Horatio, are you going to kiss me again or not?" Archie wondered, rolling his eyes despite the bemused twist that crossed his lips.

Slipping away from Archie, and walking further into the wardroom, Horatio folded his arms sullenly and grumbled under his breath. "All you had to do was bloody well ask..."

Archie was on him so fast that Horatio barely had time to cry out in surprise in between being spun around to face the other man and having their lips crushed together in a kiss that was too almost too passionate to be considered as anything but punishing. Horatio's hands instinctively found Archie's shoulders in a move that could've been defensive anyplace else, but he only wound up gripping the material of Archie's uniform jacket hard enough to make his fists ache for all his desperation.

"You do not like me to *ask*," Archie finally said, his tone as rough as the manner in which he pulled away.

And then his lips came down on Horatio's once more in a wet, open-mouthed kiss, and everything else just... blanked out. Horatio could think of no other name he could give to the unusual -- but stimulating -- feeling. In one moment, he was trying not to shudder at the fiery note in Archie's voice, and in the next he found himself retaliating against a passionate assault with one of his own that was just as brutal.

His jacket was jerked down and off his arms and he could not even be sure whether it was of Archie's doing, or his own. Horatio's mind fuzzily recognized that it was Archie's fingers that fumbled with the polished buttons of his waistcoat, but it was not a second before that was gone, too, leaving him in shirtsleeves as it fell to the floor. The black cravat still hung around his neck, if not tied as neatly as it had been before. He could not quite bring himself to care about that, but he *did* know that he wanted it gone completely, maybe along with the rest of his clothing...

The ribbon tying his queue went next with Archie's hands tangling in his hair. For some reason, that managed to snap Horatio out of his daze long enough to get Archie out of his own jacket before he was being slammed up against something hard. He grunted at the impact; likewise, the wine glasses on their silver tray rattled noisily as the polished wood cabinet was jolted despite being bolted to the floor. Something clattered onto its side, but he dismissed that eagerly, as well, too badly consumed by the relentless pressure of Archie's mouth and its honey-sweet flavour. If he kept up like this, he would probably not even notice if someone burst through the door, shouting...

Against his lover's lips, he groaned in dismay. "Aaah... Archie, please wait... We agreed to not let this get out of control -- not in *here*..."

"Hornblower, the door is locked tight," Archie promised, cupping his chin and coaxing him into a kiss that was tender in comparison to the one that had just ended. For a moment Archie thought he felt Horatio relax, and he took that as a sign to offer the last of the reassurance he had in him. "We will not be interrupted."

Horatio gave a haughty sniffle and touched their foreheads together gently. "If some emergency happened out there..." He sighed. "They would not have the courtesy of knocking before running to get us, even if they had to break down the door."

"We are quite safely at port, love. The only emergency I can think of right now is if the ship was hit by lightning or swallowed by the sea."

"That isn't funny," Horatio grumbled, though he had to stifle a laugh.

"No, it isn't, but neither situation is very likely to happen. By the sounds of the merrymaking I hear coming from the gundeck, I don't think any of the ratings are too concerned about that eventuality, either; it seems to me they're took concerned with celebrating. I think I heard Matthews mention it was Andy Jennings' birthday." Archie felt Horatio's reluctant -- nay, begrudging -- nod, and he chuckled. " Please stop worrying, and let me kiss you?" At Horatio's gentle, incoherent murmur, he smiled adoringly, whispering, "Let me love you?"

"You do that already."

"And yet I still cannot seem to do it enough," Archie sighed, forcing a tone of resignation.

Horatio's smile could've lit up an entire room, with brightness to spare. "Tell me the truth... how much did I just ruin the moment?"

"Oh, you completely obliterated it," Archie assured him, simply.

Hornblower's face fell. "I see. I, uh... I was just checking."

"But I still want you."

"How's about that kiss, then?"

"You can be a little strange sometimes," Archie said, as he tilted Horatio's face up to take him up on his own offer. "You're just fortunate that I find you irresistible."

Horatio just grinned wordlessly as their mouths met, a little softer than before. He still felt a little wary of that door, but he also couldn't argue with Archie's reasoning when he really did have a point. They would be fine. Fine, fine, fine...

Horatio gasped when he was pressed up against the cabinet again, his lips parting, and Archie seized the opportunity to find Horatio's tongue with his own. He was most glad that Horatio had at last seemed to have driven away his misgivings over their security in the wardroom with this kiss, but he couldn't help but wonder at how... like him it was. Archie would admit that, for all of Horatio's passion -- both for his career and in matters of love alike -- he was sometimes so cautious in how he spent that zeal that he often came across as looking not very passionate at all. Not that that was the case, of course.

To anyone else, it could've proved most confusing, but to Archie it felt a great deal like he alone had been allowed to see a bit more of what Horatio was truly like at the core. He'd recognized that spark right from the beginning -- it was a part of the whole that he found so enticing -- but when he kissed Horatio just so, or touched him in just the right way, that same spark just ignited a fire that was thrilling in its ferocity.

That was, Archie suspected, exactly what helped them achieve such a perfect balance between tender love and carnal desire; no matter how rough either of them got, there was... something... Horatio did that made it feel sweet, tender. It worked either way, too, much to their mutual delight. Horatio fucked with love, and knew how to drag Archie along for the ride.

He was doing a fine job of it right then, too, even letting Archie lead things.

"Christ, Horatio... you're incredible," Archie murmured in amazement. Horatio laughed at the out-of-nowhere comment, but Archie just shook his head and gently pulled him towards the large oak table that dominated the wardroom. "You are."

"If I am, it is because I'm yours."

Archie grinned. "Then you shall always remain incredible."

"I love you."

"I know."

The lines blurred as clothing was tugged off and thrown away with the meeting of their lips, again, and again, and again... The once reassuring hardness of the polished tabletop changed under the skin of Horatio's back, an old stability that grew soft with the feel of Archie inside of him. The boundaries of passion shifted for them just being where they were; they were making love at sea, making love in the one place they had learned to truly feel at home. Archie and Horatio could both hear the sounds of their ship and their ocean beyond, even at port, above the pitch of their hushed cries, and existing there in that way without any other feelings of fear or hurry stirred up sensations that turned everything else upside-down. That in itself was a release, of sorts -- they were in love, and they were home... for what more could they possibly have asked? Climax was something that came and left them more at peace than ever before.

Somehow still tangled in his lover's arms, trying to support himself on shaky legs against the table, while Horatio likewise tried to catch his breath, Archie nuzzled into the warmth of his neck and sighed. He didn't know how long it was -- minutes could've been hours, for all his perception was doing for him at that point -- but he let the comfortable togetherness stretch out for as long as he could before he felt the impulse to say something that was entirely of his nature. "Love?"

Horatio just smiled lazily; Archie could've sworn that his response was a contented purr, the kind a particularly satisfied cat would have made after being scratched just right behind the ears. "Mmm?"

"How long d'you suppose it'll be before Sawyer makes another 'informed decision' to detain us on board like this again?"

*****

Archie did not appreciate having had to leave Horatio's side to go fetch the Captain from shore with the coxswain and the other ratings manning the oars. He didn't care if it was not his place to complain about such things, just as he didn't care whether or not Sawyer's return had been delayed two days after the shore leave had technically ended... As if being kept aboard hadn't been bad enough (not that he had any mind to consider it *bad*), he'd had to drop whatever he was doing -- it hadn't mattered if he could've spent time around Horatio later -- and see the Captain back aboard, too? Where was the justice in that?

And why the hell had Horatio let an ass-kisser like this Second Lieutenant Bush even set foot on the Renown's decks? By the way he was rolling his eyes at everything the ship's newest officer said, it seemed that regret over that very thing had crossed his mind. So why had he bloody done it?

Mentally hushing himself when he realized that Horatio was saying something, he barely picked up what he was saying to Bush. "... don't know Captain Sawyer, then."

The light scorn in Horatio's voice had to have been as obvious to Bush as it was to Archie, for the newcomer practically narrowed his eyes when he answered. "But I know his reputation." By the way he said it, it was like he thought it completely obvious that no more than that was needed to judge a character.

Before Archie could even stop himself, he was saying the first thought to cross his mind, and in a cocky tone that would've made someone like Mr. Hobbs proud, to boot: "As a fighting captain... or as a man?" He hoped he wasn't smiling outright, to add insult to injury.

However, the second Bush turned his clear blue eyes onto Archie, nearly looking down his nose at him, he found that he honestly didn't care about how insulting he'd sounded, regardless of rank. In fact, he suddenly had the strange desire for someone to lead Bush away and show him the wardroom. There was a very attractive table right in the middle of it; he and Horatio had even gone through the trouble of christening it only a matter of days before, in their own special little way. Maybe Bush could go enjoy a few meals there.

Drawn from his thoughts by the realization that Bush was still staring at him intently, along with Horatio, Buckland and no doubt half of the other men on deck, Archie boldly met his gaze, as Bush spoke. "What are you implying, Mr...?"

Archie knew Horatio would chastise him for being a cocky later, and probably Buckland on top of that, but he couldn't help digging his nails in a little more. "Kennedy, sir. Fourth Lieutenant." He fancied that he had a way of making an inferior rank sound better than Captain.

"Well, Mr. Kennedy, I don't think I much care for your tone, sir."

It was Buckland who interjected, though Archie had a strong suspicion it was to prevent him from breathing another word as much as it was to prevent Bush from continuing. "Ah... Mr. Kennedy was just making conversation. Weren't you, Mr. Kennedy?"

At that, Kennedy just gave his most innocent smile, and nodded with what could've passed as sincerity to a blind man. Then again, he wasn't really trying to look all that sincere. Not for Bush's sake, at least. For Buckland, however, it seemed to do the trick. It figured.

The First Lieutenant, clearly uncomfortable with the rising tension, quickly turned his attentions back towards Bush and gestured in the direction of the stairs leading down to the lower levels of the ship. His hurried words made Horatio's eyes tick over to his lover's in a mix of amusement and shocked realization, and it was all Archie could do to not burst out laughing right then and there.

"Now, let me show you the wardroom."


~Finis~