A wise man once said "Shit happens."

That would be my life motto.

I am such a trouble magnet that I cannot go at least a single day without falling down the stairs, twice. While simultaneously knocking down three lamps. I shit you not.

I can also say that as soon as something good happens to me I become instantly suspicious and paranoid, rightly so. Because, honestly, what the hell!? Does the world just love fucking with me? Am I Lady Luck's personal whipping boy?

I went to the store early in the afternoon yesterday. The entire time that I was there, everything went my way.

I EVEN GOT THE LAST BOX OF HOT COCOA! The good kind. The one with mini-marshmallows.

So I honestly was expecting the shit to hit the fan. Although, not even I could expect something of such epic proportions to happen.

"Dame-Tsuna, you are the only living heir of the Vongola Famiglia. You are the only one able to become its Don and I am your home tor- tutor. I am the World's Greatest Hitman, Reborn. You also have a time limit." A mother-fucking BABY wearing a fedora said. WHILE HOLDING A GUN AT MY FACE!

...

THE FUCK!?