The Real You
By diav
Genre: Friendship
Rating: T
Characters: Shego, Kim Possible
Story Type: one-shot
Summary: Shego reminisces about the past- her rivalries, friendships, and crushes, and is interrupted by a stranger. Slightly AU?
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the Kim Possible series.
Shego looked at her mug.
"Another," she said as she hailed the barkeep.
"Ma'am, you've had one too many," he replied as he took her mug.
"Why do you care? I'm paying, you profit, the world's a happy place," she sighed as she sagged in her seat.
"I don't wantcha to wake up and not know where you are, missy."
Shego contemplated for a moment to burn the man's hair, but chose not to. Better not attract any attention to myself... Not that it matters much anymore, she thought.
"All right, all right. Just give me water and I'll watch your TV." She pointed to the LCD on the wall. Some music video had started playing and it had a nice melody.
Shego sighed, propped up an elbow and listened to the lyrics.
I wish the music would carry me away
'cause I don't wanna be stuck down here
And I wonder what I did this time
Could I be so cavalier?
Shego blinked. The last time she saw her, things didn't go so well.
"What's the matter, Princess? Not wanting to fight back?" Shego took a jab at the redhead who easily deflected the move.
"I'm tired of this game, Shego."
"What game?"
"Why are you doing this? You could seriously injure me or put me and Ron out of business with your plasma, yet you don't. Why?"
Shego was surprised and had faltered, letting Kim roundhouse kick her in the gut.
"Oh my God, Shego, are you all right?"
Shego coughed and wiped her brow. When the redhead came to her aid, she ignited her plasma to try to get the redhead to back off - but Kim didn't. So she threw a plasma bolt at the redhead's feet, causing the teen to jump out of the way.
"What is your problem, Shego? I'm just trying to help."
The older woman growled. "Why do you want to help me? Just do your goody two shoes thing and just let me be! I'm a thief! I'm evil!" She spat out the word with such malice that Kim took a step back. "Heroes don't help evil people!"
Kim looked hurt. "I don't think you're evil."
"I lie, I cheat, I steal. Evil."
"But you don't kill," whispered the redhead. "If you really think I'm such a nuisance, why haven't you killed me to let Drakken carry on with his plans all this time?"
Shego reignited her plasma and growled. "Shut up and fight, Kimmie."
"No, I'm not going to give in. Why can't we just be friends?"
"Friends?" barked Shego. "Good and evil don't mix."
"You're not all that evil, Shego," replied Kim as she relaxed her stance.
Shego threw a punch as Kim sidestepped it and watch Shego stumble.
She's just saying these things to throw you off, Shego thought. It's just a trick to get me arrested again. I'm not going down without a fight.
When Shego was about to ignite her plasma, Kim grabbed her hands and looked her in the eye.
"No more, Shego, I don't want to do this anymore. You keep running from the truth, the real you. You're not evil. If you were, you'd take this opportunity to do some serious harm to me."
Shego lit up her hands in anger. Who was this teen to tell her what was real and what wasn't? Kim didn't flinch as the flames danced on her hands.
"See? It's not even hurting me."
She was right. Shego had intended to scare the redhead, but it didn't seem like any of her tactics were working.
For Shego, she had been somewhat confused since the Lowardians attacked Earth. She had teamed up with Team Possible to save the world, despite being a villain. Did that make her good again? Or was it a one-time thing? Drew had somewhat cleaned up his act and began manufacturing some strange chemical compound that helped plants with growth. He hadn't sent her on any assignments lately, so Shego had decided to just go off on her own for the afternoon; Drakken was too busy with his business meetings to notice her missing, so she decided to just raid an old lair to see if she could sell any old parts to another peer in the Villains United network. Right when she was rummaging for scrap, the teen hero had come out of nowhere.
Shego snuffed out her hands and removed herself from Kim's grip. "What do you want from me?" she asked dejectedly. Deep down, she knew she couldn't hurt Kim, it just didn't seem right to injure the very person who reminded her do much of her younger self from her hero days.
Kim shrugged. "I'm retiring soon."
"What? Why?" Shego tapped her foot and then snapped her fingers when a thought came to her. "The Buffoon asked you to marry him. That must be why."
"The Lowardians did their damage, Global Justice and Team Impossible are doing their thing and it's turning out well. I have college, so... Yeah." Kim noticed that Shego had a brow raised because she didn't answer the question about Ron. She shook her head. "He did, but I said no."
Both brows were raised now.
"We want different things in life, that's all. I mean, he's great and all, but I don't see myself getting married just yet. Besides, Team Possible is going to split up once he goes to Japan."
"You don't seem like a quitter, Kimmie. You're too pure for that."
"Oh, so you can be evil and I can't? It's not about purity, Shego. I just have other things I'd like to do. I've hardly had much of a normal life, Shego... Especially growing up with a brain surgeon and rocket scientist as parents. I'd just like, for once, to figure out how to live my life. Missions were fun and all, but I'd like more out of life than saving the world on demand. Call me selfish, if you will, but don't you want the same too?"
The redhead has a point, Shego thought. "It's two different things, Kimmie. I do as I'm told because I'm getting paid for it, but when I'm off on my own, I do my own thing. There are too many rules with being a hero, that's what I didn't like about it." She was being honest to Kim since Go City's regulations had hindered her abilities as a 'hero' to carry out justice in the past. "But you're different than me, Kimmie. You've still got some good in you. You don't break rules, nor would you ever lie, cheat, or steal." Curious, she asked, "What's wrong with the Buffoon?"
Kim replied, "I don't think I love him. I love him as a brother, but not like that." The redhead turned her head to look at nothing in particular. "Besides, I think I like someone else right now."
Shego shrugged. "Why ask me to be friends when I'll automatically be out of the equation when you retire?"
Kim shook her head. "No, you won't be out of the question... We've gotten along a few times, why not now?"
"Well, for one, I'm still evil, Dr. D's got his own plans-"
"-Plans to start a fertiliser company, along with patenting his plant rejuvenation serum or whatever he calls it. I hardly think that's evil."
"I have a rap sheet that's probably longer than-"
"You received amnesty from Global Justice."
"Can I make my point here, or are you going to keep interrupting me?" snapped Shego. The redhead sheepishly shrugged and waited for Shego to continue.
"The point is, Kimmie," said Shego as she pointed to herself. "I'm not a likeable person."
"I'm sorry you feel that way, but I like you." A blush quickly appeared as the redhead looked straight ahead at Shego.
Oh, what's this? Princess' got a crush on this badass thief? Surely she should've figured out the pet names by now, Shego thought.
She would have given the teen a smug look, but refrained from doing so. "You like my brainwashed self, that's not me... Miss Goody-Two Shoes Go doesn't exist."
"I can hardly think of you as evil because you studied child development in college. You at least must like kids... So you can't really be evil."
Shego narrowed her eyes. The kid did have a point. She shrugged.
"What are you doing in this old lair anyway?"
She shrugged again. Kim had no right asking questions just because she wanted to be "friends." Shego had been living so long on her own in the cold, real world that she had forgotten what it was like to be cared for. But, no, the idea the redhead was proposition was preposterous. How could a villain befriend a hero? It just didn't make sense.
Kim was annoyed. Here she was, trying to at least talk to Shego and the woman wasn't being the least helpful. "So you're just going to stand there and not answer my questions?"
"I answer to no one. Unless that no one is willing to pay for my services." Shego flashed a smug smile at Kim. "Unless, you're willing to pay?"
"You know what, Shego, you're impossible," seethed Kim. "Here I am, trying to have a decent conversation with you and you're just acting like a... Like a..."
"Like a what?" snapped Shego.
A jerk, the redhead thought. Honestly, she thought, I don't know why I always find myself drawn to her. I mean, I figured out the reasons for name calling for a very long time, but she's never made a move. All we do is spar and she teases me to no end... Am I just paranoid or what? Is it all in my head? I just want her to say something that confirms my theory before I do anything. Or maybe it's all just good teasing. Maybe she...
Kim groaned in annoyance from how her thoughts had derailed. "You know what? Never mind. And here I thought a part of you liked me too." Kim kicked the dirt on the ground. "I respect you, Shego, I do. The world isn't always black and white, there's always shades of grey. It's why I'm retiring from this hero business thing. I can't save the world without crossing a few lines. I get it. That's why you went rogue..." Kim's expression softened. "But I guess somewhere along the road, you took a different path. In a strange way, I'm glad. Because I got to meet you." Kim saw that Shego was genuinely surprised by the confession - a light blush had appeared on her pale cheeks.
Kim was confused. One minute the woman was playing along, the next she was on the offensive. Sighing, Kim shook her head. "But I think you don't feel the same." Dejected, the redhead walked back to the way she came - an air duct, no less - and said, "Goodbye, Shego. Maybe we'll cross paths again" before disappearing.
She could've stopped her, she knew, but she didn't. She did respect the young woman, saw enough of her hero self every time they fought, so why was she unwilling to accept the offer of friendship? Or, possibly something more? Today, she got more than she bargained for: Kim Possible coming to her door for a chat and more or less offered her a gateway back into normal life. A life with real friends. If not many, at least one. A friend in Kim Possible.
Shego had wrestled with the fact that, deep down, she wasn't evil. The evil that exists come in the form of those who kill and torture. I steal for the thrills, she reminded herself. But mostly the thrill of sparring with Kim.
And now that major player has decided to retire. What will she do?
The news came as a shock to most of the world, their beloved teen hero moving on to different things in life. Global Justice and Team Impossible dominated the crime-fighting regions of the world and stopped schemes before they could be planned.
Shego? What did she do?
Could it be that we met at the wrong time?
How am I supposed to live with that?
I spent the past six years doing nothing, she thought as she stared at the television screen when the song ended.
Suddenly stealing became a chore for the woman, so instead she invested in companies and managed to become one of the most profitable anonymous investors in the state. Money was no issue, Shego realised. It was friendship and love that were unattainable - money couldn't buy either of them.
So here she was, at this small local drinking hole, as just another pretty face who could hold her liquor well.
Oh, no, she didn't remain in Middleton long after Kim's retirement announcement. There was no point because the redhead also announced she would be studying abroad.
Shego had packed up her bags from the lair, also legally known as Drakken's Global Enterprise, bid her employer adieu since there was no longer a need for her to steal when he was so successful with his brands of weed killer and fertiliser. Of course, the blue man had offered her a top position in the company, but was turned down with a blast of plasma.
So, she spent the world just travelling. Trying to do things normal people did when they went on vacation. Except the green skin scared people off and the pardons did not help her.
Maybe everyone will just think of me as that villain wanted in eleven countries, she had thought. Well, fuck that, I'm me and I do what I want to do.
There were a few times during her travels where she was stopped because she was recognised and people had to contact the appropriate authorities to verify her status. It would just be easier to do things illegally, she had thought, but she wanted to know whether she could just be normal again.
But, normal is something I'm not, Shego thought as she looked around the bar. Ever since that comet gave me these powers, my life changed so much. I don't really remember what it was like before I got my powers... I use them so much now, to heat up food, keep myself warm, and even my superhuman strength helps me scare off drunks who try to pick me up, that I'm not too sure what I'd be like without them. Definitely not Miss Go, though... Way too perky.
She sipped her water and watched two patrons drunkenly argue with each other about something stupid. They were shoving each other and the bartender grabbed a bat from behind the counter.
"Break it up or I'll break your jaw," the barkeep snarled.
The two drunks took one look at the bat and backed off. One of them left while the other stayed.
"You," the bartender hissed at Shego. "What's a pretty girl like you doing here at this watering hole? This is no place for you. The men here are pigs."
"I can handle myself," replied Shego as she lit up a finger.
"Whoa, all right, just keep that to yourself and don't burn the joint down, ok?" said the bartender as he edged back to his spot behind the bar. "I've got bills to pay and a family to feed. Don't want no lady burning my place down."
Shego extinguished her finger. "That your family?" She pointed to a picture that hung on the wall behind the bartender.
He nodded as he cleaned mugs. "Ten and six, me kids. Wish I had more time to spend with them, but I've got to run the place."
"And your wife?"
"Up 'n left after the little one was born. Ungrateful woman," he spat. "But me kids, they're wonderful. Don't need no mom, they're tough."
"Where do they go when you're working?" asked Shego.
"We live upstairs... They're probably doing homework or something."
"You just leave them alone without a sitter?"
"Why you asking?" He looked at her inquisitively.
Shego shrugged. "Figured some adult supervision would be good, just in case."
He shook his head. "Can't afford it, missy. If I could, I would."
Just then, Shego heard light footsteps behind the bar. "Daddy." The child was the younger one, Shego noticed as she peered over the bar table to look. The girl squeaked when she saw the older woman looking at her.
"Hey, Michelle, don't be scared of the pretty lady. Say hi."
The girl hid behind her father as she mumbled 'hello'.
Shego smiled and replied with a "Hi, Michelle."
The girl clutched the back of her father's jeans and mumbled, "Dad, Jeanie wants to know if you'll let us have ice cream..."
Her father grinned as he picked up the six year old and said, "'Course you can!"
"I don't think there's any in the fridge," pouted the child.
"Oh... Can you wait tomorrow? Daddy's still got work..."
The girl shook her head and put on a face that made Shego laugh.
The barkeep looked at her and said, "You wanna run out and grab ice cream for them?"
Shego stared. "Lookit, uh.."
"The name is Joe."
"Lookit, Joe, I'm a paying customer-"
"-You were."
"You honestly want me to go get ice cream for your kids? I barely know you!"
"Oh, come on, you can't even do this for her?" He lifted Michelle so that she was sitting on the edge of the bar. The girl was now giving a look Shego knew well: a puppy dog pout. An image of Kim's face flashed momentarily before Shego said, "Ack!"
Shego hadn't seen that pout in years and it surprisingly made her smile. "All right, all right. What kinds do they like?"
What Michelle said startled both her father and Shego. "Can I go with the lady, daddy? Jeanie and I like to pick our own..."
Joe narrowed his eyes at Shego. "Give me your wallet with your ID. I'll give you money for ice cream. Come back in half an hour or I'm calling the cops."
Michelle was still giving her the puppy dog pout, so Shego obliged. She handed over her wallet which, for once, actually did contain her ID, and shook her head. "Kids," she mumbled.
Joe asked Michelle to get Jeanie as Shego waited. Not long, a taller, yet solemn looking, girl appeared beside Michelle. Joe ruffled her hair and said, "This lady's gonna take you guys for ice cream. If she does anything, just bite her and come back here, ok?" Turning to Shego, he said, "Take them to the convenience store that's by the store. Thirty minutes."
The woman nodded. She was amused by how she ended up with these two kids in tow.
"What's your name?" asked Jeanie as they walked together in the dark. Shego wasn't sure whether to hold their hands or just watch them as they went.
"Shego."
"Like She... Goes?" Jeanie looked at Shego, who shook her head.
"It's one word. Shego."
Michelle took Shego's hand as they continued walking. The older woman smiled at the touch - at least her green skin didn't scare them away. She wasn't sure whether they even knew about her skin colour since it was dim inside the bar and it was getting dark outside.
They walked in silence for the next little while before Jeanie also took Shego's other hand.
When they got to the convenience store, the kids were peering through the glass freezer doors and excitedly chatting about the different flavours. Shego watched on in amusement, not noticing a stranger was watching her.
The kids had each pulled out a tub of their favourite flavours - orange Creamsicle for Michelle and mint chocolate chip for Jeanie. Shego paid with the money that Joe gave her before she was startled by a familiar voice.
The voice was soft. "Shego?"
The woman turned to the speaker. "Kim?" She was in disbelief. The two sisters looked at both women.
Shego picked up her change from the cashier and waited for Kim to pay for her items (a water bottle and a stick of gum). They exited the store in silence. The two sisters were holding hands as they walked back to the bar.
"So... What are you doing down here in Lowerton?" asked Shego as she fidgeted with the bag of ice cream tubs.
"Had some errands to run... You?"
"Was at the local watering hole when I got coerced into buying ice cream for these two." She pointed at the two girls who were now excitedly talking about how many spoonfuls of ice cream they were going to eat.
"Oh... Ok."
Shego shrugged. "They're not mine, just the barkeep's. He's got my wallet and ID hostage."
"You carry ID?" Kim couldn't hide her amusement. Shego was somewhat different since they last spoke. Of course, Kim had regretted her words but by the time she tried looking for Shego, the woman had up and left Middleton for good. Kim even asked Drakken for Shego's contact information, but it was to no avail. The woman had simply disappeared off the surface of the Earth.
"Yeah, being a good citizen and all," replied Shego without any hint of sarcasm.
They had reached the bar now and the two kids excitedly ran in. Joe nodded as Shego placed the change and ice cream onto the table and handed back her wallet.
"Thanks." He turned to the girls. "Now, Michelle, Jeanie, don't eat all of it at once." The two sisters grinned at their father when he handed them the tubs.
"Thanks, Shego!" they said before disappearing upstairs.
Shego nodded in acknowledgement and met the eyes of an amused Kim.
"What?"
"Nothing," replied Kim. "I always knew you were good with kids."
Shego shrugged.
"So where are you headed now?"
Shego was startled by the question. She had always thought Kim was mad or disappointed in her and never wanted to see her again. She shrugged. "I was here earlier, which is how I got roped into buying ice cream. I think I'm just going to take a walk..." She paused. "Want to join?"
Kim nodded as Shego gave Joe a wave goodbye. Before she knew it, they were out the door, walking in comfortable silence. Shego rounded the corner and headed towards the now-empty park. It was quiet tonight, save for the chirping of crickets in the distance as the two women made their way through.
Kim broke the silence first. "Would it be mean of me to ask you how you've been, Shego? I know I said some nasty things to you the last time we met..."
"Don't sweat it, Prin-" Shego frowned. It wasn't time to go back to old habits. "Kim. I was a jerk to you too."
Ignoring Shego's sudden formality, the redhead continued, "I actually came back to look for you. By that point, Drakken had told me you upped and left."
"A villain is useless without the hero," Shego said softly.
Kim hesitantly took Shego's hand. Noticing that the older woman remained impassive, she entwined her fingers with her companion - again, no resistance. Kim whispered, as if the dark was eavesdropping on their conversation, "You're not the villain now. I don't think you ever were..."
Shego felt a kind of warm spread over her body with Kim's hand in hers. She wasn't wearing her gloves - she hadn't been since Kim's retirement - and it was a nice feeling to hold another's hand in hers. She asked Kim again softly, "Why are you here, Kim?"
"I really want to apologise," said the redhead. She stopped walking, causing Shego to jerk a little as their hands were still entwined. "I know I can't exactly take back the words or the feelings, but I'm sorry if I offended you."
Shego stayed silent for a minute before speaking. "You know, Kim, it did hurt a little to hear that you were disappointed in me." She shook her head. "It hurt a lot." She noticed that Kim had a pained expression on her face after she said that. "It was just, suddenly, my teen rival decides to drop out of everything that I had built a life around... Without you in the picture, there wasn't really a purpose for me to..." She faltered because she was being honest with the redhead. "...to do anything."
Kim squeezed Shego's hand in response before the older woman continued.
"The truth often hurts, Kim. It did for me. Yes, I was once like you, a hero with my brothers... But justice is bound by the parameters of societal law... Sometimes, you have to break the law to do good... You told me that that day... And I began wondering what made me join the other side. It seemed a lot more fun to break the rules to which I was once confined... There's a thrill in that... But once I realised that your retirement would make me bored, I just upped and left."
Kim nodded in understanding. "You know, while you're good at what you do, I really did admire your ability to fight and defend yourself. I think you trained me up more than anyone else could have... Thank you."
Shego nodded. They started walking again, relishing the small contact they had with the other through their conjoined hands.
Kim continued, "I asked Wade to look high and low for you, but I don't think he found any trace of you at all. It was only until recently that I had seen you around in the area."
Shego shrugged. "I'm legally registered to live here, you just have to look carefully. People don't seem to recognise me out here much... Maybe the skin colour turns them away, but it's a nice area... I get my privacy and don't have teens dropping down from the ceiling to want to fight me."
Kim smiled as she playfully bumped Shego's shoulder. "I'm really glad I ran into you today..." She suddenly let go of Shego's hand and turned away. "I wasn't too sure how you'd react if I stopped by your house to apologise. You might've blasted me out the front door..."
"Kim, I can't stay mad forever..." Shego put a hand on Kim's shoulder. "You made me realise that, despite what I thought of you in the past, you did remind me of my younger self. Trying to do good for everyone... And despite working for the wrong side, I hoped that you wouldn't follow the same path as me. You deserve to live the way you want and not be burdened by the expectations of being a hero. Retired or not."
"You know, Shego," said Kim as she bit her lip. Her back was still facing Shego and the woman's hand remained on her shoulder. "Please don't be offended, but is this the real you? This down-to-earth Shego who's calmly talking to me and not going to blast me across this park if I say something as stupid as this? I missed the 'evil' Shego a lot too, but I want to try to get to know the real you. Not the Miss Go you... The one that isn't always sarcastic, the one who isn't afraid to show she cares about someone or something..."
Shego turned Kim around and looked her in the eye. She lit up her free hand and brought it to touch Kim's face. The redhead didn't flinch as she cupped Kim's face with her lit hand and said, "The real me is for you to figure out, if you want to."
Kim closed her eyes and smiled. She spoke carefully, "Is that an invitation for us to be friends?"
That one word she missed hearing from that one woman made her grin wider.
"Doy."
Author's Notes: This story majorly derailed itself from my small plot bunny... I had originally just wanted Kim to walk into the bar and cut it off there... But I changed some stuff around.
Shego is mellowed out, so if she seems out of character, I wouldn't really think so. Six years can change someone.
Also working off the premise that they both romantically like each other (to a small degree), but you can just take it as a friendship story too.
One-shot only. No updates in the future.
Story title and italicised lyrics from "The Real You" by Alex Goot.
