It was a frigid autumn night in Dimmsdale. Mr. Crocker was hammering away at his keyboard in his mother's basement when he received an interesting notification. One New Message! "Why would anyone want to message me," the dispirited teacher asked himself. He read the message: "Hello Mr. Crocker, I have question for you. Why is your ear on your neck?" Mr. Crocker was not pleased with this question, for he has always been self-conscious about his ear-ridden neck. The truth was that he did not even know the answer to this question, so he decided to click out of the wikiHow article on how to tie a noose and opened webMD. "No. It is far too late. I do not want to know the answer," he told himself as he reopened wikiHow. Crocker followed all of the steps to the letter, but when he attempted to hang himself, the rope got caught up on his neck-ear. He couldn't believe his situation. All the noose could accomplish was giving him some mild discomfort and chafing in his neck area before things really got bad; after a few seconds of hanging from his neck and neck-ear, the pressure of gravity began to cause the noose to rip off his neck-ear. First, the ear lobe began to rip, causing an unnatural amount of blood to pour out of the side of his neck. His red dress shirt, once white, began to to weigh him down more. Finally, his shitty ceiling gave way before his neck ever could, and he found himself laying on the floor surrounded by only the rope and some dislodged drywall. He was somehow still alive, however, and this made Crocker boy question his existence. "Xolotl! I desire your sweet embrace! Retrieve my body from this void!"Crocker blinked his eyes, and when they reopened, he saw the world as some bizarre moving tye die void that he could float through. He realized this had to be the work of FAIRY GOD PARENTS! He orgasmed, turning his shirt white again. The cum just kept shooting out to the point that Crocker began to get light headed; he took his belt off and tied it extremely tight around his lighthouse in order to hold back all the seed. His lighthouse soon became an igloo due to all the bent up seminal fluid, and he cried aloud in excruciating pain. The sea-men needed to depart from the harbor, so they looked through their telescope and saw a hole where the ear once rested. The sea-men's big cave adventure would go on to impregnate the hole left in Crocker's neck, and Crocker would go on to name the child "Neckolas". Neckolas was a slimy little faggot that always tried to peek into his classmates underwear to find, what he called "Fairy Penis Lips". He was eating Doug Dimmad-O's cereal one day while watching tv when he stumbled upon a porno, and the anatomy of a normal human was revealed to him. He realized something about him was different. This would explain why everyone that he was surrounded by looked like similar, primate-esque creatures while he looked like the meatball guy from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. He was saddened at this discovery and almost immediately became suicidal. He logged in to his father's old computer and tried to find answers, but his searches auto-completed to a wikiHow article that had been viewed previously. He was more successful at the act than his father. He tied the knot, strung the rope, and put his head in the noose. Whispering cries to his deceased father, he jumped from the kitchen counter into the air, hanging himself. He was, again, more successful than his father. His body flapped around in the dark room, until it came to a soft, lifeless swing. Outside the window were two figures, Cosmo and Wanda. They just glared at the motionless body swing back and forth, proud of what they had caused. This is what happens when you fuck with fairies.