The Rain

Leon slumped down the side of a building in the Third District, feeling the rain wash over him. He cluctched at his head, cursing himself for all that he had ever done. He had screwed up royally, and he knew that he could never fix it. Never again make himself right. Images assulted him, images of his past, and his present. Flashes of past disgraces, ones he loved shunning him for his idiocy. He hated himself, hated the way that he reacted to people, hated how little he cared... He saw briefly the eyes of his friend, Seifer... Cold and distrusting... He had failed to save him in time, failed to save his soul from corruption. Those eyes would forever haunt him. They hated him, held a fury that seemed almost unfathomable to Leon. Seifer brought his troubles upon himself, but he would never forgive Leon for failing to act when he needed to. No one would ever forgive him for his apathy. He changed his name, even, to try to keep the memories from his mind. But, it didn't matter. Voices of the slain, voices of those betrayed, were always there, echoing in his mind. He saw also the cold eyes of someone he once loved, Rinoa... He blamed himself for her death... He knew it was his fault, regardless of the other's false attempts to make him feel better. They held nothing but contempt and lies for him, and he couldn't stand their false smiles, their eyes filled with thinly veiled disgust... What did it matter, they're all dead now. The cacophony in his head drove him from cities, even from towns. He took refuge in a forest, surviving the Heartless invasion simply because they didn't believe anyone else existed. Or, perhaps they felt his pain, and kept him alive to suffer. He supposed that that was the reason. He was always meant to suffer... Rinoa had been so full of light, but she was extinguished before he even realized her importance, and he blamed himself. Everything was his fault, through inaction, and it tortured him more than any failed mission could have. He never even tried to make himself exist. He was content with slowly destroying himself, unaware that he was destroying everyone else in the process... He saw then the true image that haunted him... Cloud. He was so dark and angry when he arrived, but he had spent so much time around Sora and the one he loved, Aerith, that he was now... bright. He was so happy, full of life... Leon had wanted him from the moment he saw him, years ago, but dismissed it. But, after watching him even when Leon himself was unaware of it, he fell in love with the beautiful blonde. Against his better judgement, he told Cloud today... It was one of the hardest things he had ever done. But, Cloud... He just gazed at Leon, before his face became filled with disgust and loathing. He wouldn't show it. He gave nothing more than a soft "oh" before getting up and walking away... But his eyes had screamed at him, calling him things that were without words, but impossible to describe. Cloud begun to hate again, simply because Leon had chosen to feel. But it didn't matter, feelings were lost on him now. Cloud's hate shut him down more than he ever had been before, killing him in ways he had never imagined. Hurting him more than he ever thought he could hurt. Images battered him like blows, words screamed through his head, cluttered his mind like bats, digging into him and tearing away his precious sanity. He could not cry, he had forgotten how, but the rain poured down his face, and it felt like tears. The heaven's were crying for him, and he was almost grateful. The clamor in his head reached a frightening pitch, a storm of screams, causing him to fall further and further from the edge. He felt blackness creep into every inch of him, soaking into his very core. For the first time in a while, he felt fear. Terrifying fear of this new sensation of weightlessness. He felt like he was free falling, and he had nothing at all to hold onto. He cried out, a inhuman cry of pain, fear, loss... and death. It echoed around the structures, darkened the sky, chilled the air. But, nothing was around to hear it.

Nothing but the rain.

Owari

A/N: o.O Um, that was weird. I think it's a precursor to another fic, but I dunno. Oh man, that makes me sad. I wrote this in like, ten minutes. I just had "Leon angst" running through my mind... I like it though... Maybe I'll write a series for this, I dunno... It feels kinda... powerful to me. I like it a lot actually, but it makes me sad... Anywho... yeah.