A/N: Behold! Scene one of the fabulous musical extravaganza I like to call "Torchwood: The Musical"!
Songs (in order of performance):
"Fool at Love"…………………………Gwen
"The Doctor I Want"…………………..Tosh and Owen
"The Coffee Song"…………………….Ianto
Scene one
Gwen lies in bed beside Rhys. She sits up and smiles at him tenderly, gently running a hand through his hair. Rhys snores.
Gwen: He lies there sleeping on so soundly
I just can't help but give a smile
The way my life's been heading as of lately
The way he acts just makes me so beguiled
Rhys grunts in his sleep and rolls over, away from her. Gwen's face falls, and she gets out of bed with a sigh.
Gwen: Sort of…
She bustles around the apartment, fixing herself breakfast and getting dressed.
Gwen: I wake up
And go to work
I don't get home till morning
He doesn't know
The things I do to keep
Him adoring me
Rhys my love why can't you see
The secrets keeping hold of me
You think I'm just too damn lazy
To be on time
But if you knew the truth
You wouldn't let me do
The things I have to do
By this time Gwen has danced into the bedroom. She leans down beside Rhys, who's still asleep, and whispers in his ear.
Gwen: I catch aliens!
Rhys: Wuzzat love?
Gwen straightens up, surprised to see that he's actually awake.
Gwen: Nothing, darling. Go back to bed. I'm off to work.
Rhys: (groans) Already? Can't you leave a bit later?
Gwen: (sighs) I'm sorry, I can't.
Rhys: (Slightly angry but still groggy) Well, try to get home early, alright? I never see you anymore!
Gwen: (bends down and plants a kiss on his forehead) I'll make sure I'm home before seven! Love you!
Gwen runs out the door. Rhys sits up on the pillows and calls after her.
Rhys: I love you too, Gwen!
Cut to Gwen walking down the street.
Gwen: I can fight a full-grown Weevil
Saved the Earth much more than once
So why am I so primivel
When it comes to love?
I can barely say "I love you"
To the man I clearly love
How can I ever say "I do"
If I don't have any guts?
Fight the shifting sands of time
Until I can't fight anymore
Eventually I'll have to face it
I'm a fool at love!
I'm braver than most full-grown men
But that's just when
It comes to cybermen
In real life
I've got less balls
Than Myfanwy (she's the pterodactyl)
I can barely say I love you
To the man I clearly love
How can I ever say I do
If I don't have any guts?
Fight the shifting sands of time
Until I can't fight anymore
Eventually I'll have to face it
I'm a fool at love!
Yes I'm a fool at love!
Oh I'm
Just a fool
At
Love!
As the song finishes, the door to the hub open and Gwen steps inside. The others look up, mumble hello, and turn back to their work.
Gwen: Good morning, Tosh!
Tosh: (glumly) Hi.
Gwen: Hi, Owen!
Owen: (elbow deep in alien corpse) 'mornin.
Gwen: (Angry) Why are you two so taciturn this morning? You're giving me a stomach ache!
Owen: Well, why are you so up?
I woke up three hours early
And couldn't get back to sleep
I knew in my gut
That this day would suck
Tosh: You think you have it bad
Well I'll tell you something sad
I was up all night
Couldn't sleep 'cause I
Gotta bad case of love
And the doctor I want
Won't make house calls for me
Owen: What doctor is that?
Ianto: (whispering to Jack) He's a stupid twat!
Tosh: He's a doctor
that sat on the chair
that your sitting on.
Owen: You've lost me, Tosh.
Tosh (to herself, silently, sadly) I don't ever want to lose you again.
Owen: What was that?
Tosh: That was nothing
Didn't say a word
At least
Nothing that you heard
Quiet as a mouse
Alone in my little house
No Mr. Mouse to keep me company
No Mickey to my Minnie
Owen: (confused and kinda freaked out) okay then… whatever…
Owen walks out of the room.
Tosh: (sighs)
Gwen: Don't worry, Tosh. I'm sure he'll notice you soon.
Ianto: Yeah, as soon as he pulls his head out of his- (notices everyone staring, and Tosh looking distressed) Sorry. Nevermind.
Jack: C'mon, people. Let's get back to work. Gwen, I want you to fill out the report on those Weevils we caught two nights ago. Tosh, work on decoding the seal on the artifact we recovered last night. Owen's busy with his corpse, so I don't have to tell him to do anything. Ianto… make me a cup of coffee.
Everyone: yes, Sir.
Ianto walks into the coffee room. His walk slowly turns into a tap dance.
Ianto: (quietly) Skip-iddy-do dap, iskpy-iddy-hippidy hop! Skip-iddy-do dap, iskpy-iddy-hippidy hop!
Americano
Cappuchino
Black espresso
Double shot please
Café au lait
Frappuchino
Extra foam
On my latte
Extra
Extra foam
Gimme a mocha
Please
With a little bit of cream
Coffee
Coffee is my soul
Coffee
Is good when it's hot
And good when it's cold
It pumps you up
When you're falling down
Keeps you up all night
Gimme a decaf
No instant
Never an instant
Coffee
The bean of life
Coffee
Coffee makes me bright
It keeps me up
And keeps me light
It's what I love
Yes it's my life
Coffee
Coffee
Coffee
Coffee makes me whole!
Jack has walked in halfway through the song and is staring at Ianto bemusedly. As the song ends, he begins to applaud.
Jack: Bravo! Bravo! Encore!
Ianto: (startled and emmbarased) Oh… erm… hello, Sir. I'll have your coffee in a moment.
Jack: Don't bother. We've got rift activity. Grab a stun gun, we're leaving now.
Ianto: Now?
End scene one.
