Dear Samantha,
I knew. I knew and it hurt. A lot. So far, my plan was working well. Until I blurted that out to you. Then, I just knew it was over. I had to destroy my fantasy didn't I? I should record it as it happened on that day…
A little before Lunch two months ago I was, once again, pretending to stare at Carly's head, so people would think I liked a straight A student like me. What they did care who I liked anyways? It should be my own business! But, no, the guys behind me decided that I needed to join their game of Truth in English and kept tossing little paper notes on my desk saying things like 'Lets hook you up with that hot chick Carly!' I was ignoring them when our teacher said "Freddie Benson! I never thought I may say this but, DETENTION!"
I was shocked. Mom was going to kill me! But, then I remembered that you would be there, so I called my Mom and said I joined the Computer Club and that I would be home an hour later every day. So, every day I managed to get detention just so I could spend another hour looking at you. Sad, wasn't it? But, it worked. For a while. Until I got suspended. Then my Mom knew. Then I got grounded from iCarly. For a month! So, our viewers got (no offence) really really bad quality. And I thought you didn't like me anymore. So when I was de-grounded I went back and it seemed like you were ignoring me. I hadn't told you I'd been grounded. So I tried to tell you then. But, my plan failed. That was the first time. So I stopped getting detention which deprived me of my hour! I was miserable, yet happy at the same time. You never had to tease me, never had to know because you weren't talking to me. That was even Sicker than detention.
After a while, I didn't know what to do, so I attempted suicide. Note: Attempted. My stupid Mom found me and now I'm on 24 hour watch by these creepy guys in suits. I don't even know what made her think I'll even bother trying again. I can just stab these guys from behind….Oh my gawd, I can't believe me, Fredward Benson, straight A student just thought about homicide! I just need to tell you how crazy I really am about you. No words can describe how I feel anymore. And there is no-one to talk to, so I talk to the school counsellor. It helps, because really, I counsel her over her boyfriend dumping her for a stripper. It kinda just lets me think for a while…You know? But, anyway, I'm not even sure if I will send this. I just absolutely HAD to say it. Write it. Whatever, you know what I mean I hope.
Love,
Freddie
