A/N: I just finished the last Mediator book a few nights ago, and the entire time I was reading it I was thinking this. I've never written for anything other than Instant Star, so it'll be interesting to see how it works out. Basically, this is my take on what would have happened if Suze never went back to 1850 and Paul succeeded in saving Jesse's life.
And that's when it hit me. Paul. I didn't think he could do it, but he did, he was. He found a way to go back in time to stop Jesse from being killed, and I didn't even do anything about it. I was sitting in my room with my boyfriend, watching movies. Movies, for goodness sake. What's wrong with me?
I freaked out, and I mean freaked out. I ran around, threw stuff, yelled stuff. I don't even know. Jesse was looking at me like I was crazy, trying to calm me down. After I realized that I was just wasting time spazzing out a few minutes later, I stopped to look at him.
He was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. There isn't even words to describe that kind of beauty. I always knew that I loved him and I felt myself falling in love with him, but at that moment I knew. I was deeply and truly in love with him, and that's all there was to it.
But that's not all I realized then. I loved him so much, that I couldn't do it. I couldn't stop Paul from saving Jesse's life just so he could be a ghost for the next 150 years. Paul was right. Everyone was right. If I really loved him, then I would let him live his life. He would die when he was eighty, not eighteen, like he was supposed to.
"Querida, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" I laughed and faked a smile.
"Nothing Jesse. It's nothing. Let's just finish the movie, ok?" He looked at me suspiciously, but didn't disagree.
We lay down on my bed watching the movie, but I couldn't help but stare at him. I knew that if Paul succeeded, then this would be the last time I would see him, be with him. I had to cherish every moment we had that night.
"Susannah, what is wrong? You're acting strange." He looked so concerned. It took all the strength I had not to tell him. I knew I couldn't. He'd try to stop him, and I couldn't let him to that. I had my mind made up.
"It's nothing Jesse. Don't worry about it." He looked at me with that face, the face that told me he knew I was lying. "It's just.." he looked at me expectantly. "I love you. I just wanted to make sure you knew that." He looked confused, but that was soon replaced with happy.
"You know I love you too." He leaned in to kiss me, and I felt my heart breaking. Out of all the kisses we ever shared, it was the best. There's no contest about it. I think it's the fact that I made it last. I never broke apart from him. I never wanted it to stop. I was in love with him, and I was doing all I could to make it last, because I knew that I wouldn't remember it when I woke up in the morning. Any of it.
I woke up the next morning to my mom yelling. I must have been exhausted or something, because it took me a while before I even realized that she was calling my name. After a few failed attempts at trying to wake me from the staircase, she came in my room yelling for me.
It was really annoying, not gonna lie. I was having some weird dream about me losing the one that I love or something like that. I barely even remembered what it was about. She took my foot, my foot of all things, and started tickling it. She knows how ticklish I am and she knew that it would wake me up. That woman sure knows me well, whether I want to admit it or not.
"Mom!" I yelled angrily at her. "It's a weekend. What do you want?"
"Susie, wake up and get dressed. A nice looking boy is here to see you." This caught my interest, but only a little bit. She was really excited. It was sorta cute, really. After all, it wasn't often boys came to my house. I wonder why.
"What boy?" I asked curiously.
"He said his name was Paul!" I looked at her surprised. I knew a Paul. I definitely knew a Paul, and he was very cute. And I mean very.
This past summer I worked at a country club, and there was this little bundle of eight year old male joy there who I had to look after all the time. He was really annoying, and I mean annoying, but there was one perk of watching him, and that was that I got to look at his hot older brother in return. That older brother just happened to be Paul.
He was nice to me, a lot nicer that I would have expected given that I was his little brother's babysitter in ugly shorts that made me ass look huge whereas he was a member of the country club, not to mention really cute, but I wasn't complaining. He was hot and I like when hot guys are nice to me. I felt this weird vibe whenever I was around him, but I just thought that he was so good looking I didn't understand why he was talking to someone like me.
But he talked to me. Quite a lot, actually. He flirted with me here and there and we went out to eat once or twice, but I never thought he paid attention to me enough to actually take the time to come to my house. I was intrigued.
"Susie, is that the same Paul that we were talking about at dinner the other night? The one your brothers say you like?!" I swear she was so excited you would think that she was the one with a crush on the guy.
"Mom, I don't like Paul. He's cute and all, but I barely know him. I think it's a little bit too soon to tell if I like the guy." My mom looked upset at the news, but slightly hopeful.
"Well maybe you'll grow to like him." I rolled my eyes. Typical mom typically trying to set me up with boys. It was annoying, no matter how cute the boy might have been.
"Mom, isn't Paul still waiting downstairs?" This caused her to get a panicked look on her face. I tried not to laugh at her, but I couldn't help it.
"Susie you're right! Here," she threw a shirt at my face, "put this on. And a skirt, and some make up. Make sure your hair looks nice. Make sure you look presentable, ok?"
"Sure," I said, throwing the shirt over my head, "but what for?"
"There is a very nice looking boy downstairs, and I just want this to turn out right. Cooperate with me here Susie, please?" Had it been any other time, I would of argued with her right then and there and thrown some kind of bitch fit, but I didn't. I wanted to know what Paul Slater was doing here, not that it was a bad thing or anything.
"Of course Mommy. I'll look presentable." She opened her mouth to argue, then looked at me with disbelief.
"Oh, well in that case, I'll tell Paul you'll be down in a minute." She walked to the door, but turned towards me when she reached it. "Don't take too long, ok Susie?" I was putting on mascara and already had on a short plaid Betsey Johnson skirt.
"I know mom. I'll be down in a minute." She smiled, and I actually felt better about myself. I couldn't wait to get downstairs.
"Paul Slater. So it really is you." When I got downstairs, he was sitting with my mom in the living room drinking what looked to be cappuccino. It was quite a sight. My mom was trying to contain her complete happiness. He probably thought that she had one too many cappuccinos, but I really knew why she was so happy. She was just happy that a cute boy was taking interest in her psycho daughter. I guess I didn't really blame her.
He looked up at me and smiled. Man, he was good looking.
"Suze, hey. I was hoping we could talk." Talk my ass. There were so many things I wanted to do with this boy, and they didn't include talking. My mom seemed to take his as her cue to leave.
"I guess I'll leave you two alone then. It was nice meeting you, Paul."
"It was nice meeting you Mrs. Ackerman." I shivered. Mrs. Ackerman. I didn't think I'd ever be able to get used to it. As she left the room, I got right down to business.
"So this is a surprise. I can't say that I'd expect to see you here."
"I just thought I'd surprise you." He smiled at me. It was absolutely gorgeous. I felt myself melt a little. "I wanted to ask you something." Luckily, I gained consciousness again by then.
"Ask away."
"Will you go to prom with me?"
This wasn't what I expected at all. I expected him to maybe ask me out on a date, but prom? It was January, and prom wasn't until usually around May. That's four months from now. Why would he ask me so soon?
"Uh Paul, prom's four months away. Why are you asking so soon?"
"I had to ask you now to make sure you didn't have a date yet." It was sweet, in a way. I think.
"Alright, but why me? I mean, we barely know you, and you know, there's a lot of other girls in the school you could of asked." He laughed. I didn't understand what was funny.
"Honestly, most of the girls at that school are airheads. Complete and utter airheads." I couldn't help but laugh at this. After all it was true. They were airheads. "And I mean, I've known you since the summer, so I know you're cool. Just go with me. We'll have fun. I promise."
"I'm not gonna lie, that was really strange. But why not." He smiled. "But under one condition. We have to hang out before, and I don't mean the night before. I wanna get to know you before I'm stuck with you an entire night, especially when that night is first prom." He smiled even wider. Man, he was cute.
"Well how about now then? Since we only have four months to get to know each other, we'd better get started now. The sooner, the better." I couldn't help but smile at him. There was just something about him that really attracted him to me, and I couldn't put my finger on it.
"You're on. Let's go."
We walked out of the house and headed toward the car when he asked "Wait, shouldn't you ask your mom first?" I couldn't help but laugh at this. He didn't know my mom, so it made sense, but to me, that question was hilarious.
"Honestly, she'd be madder at me if I didn't go with you than if I did. I'm fine." He laughed. I really liked his laugh. I normally don't pay attention to the way people laugh, but there was something about it that was just adorable.
"Alright then. Let's go." As we drove off, I found myself smiling the entire time. I knew this was the beginning of something great, I just didn't know what.
"Susie, honey, hurry up! Paul's here!" I swear, that woman gets more excited every time he comes over than I do. You would think that she was the one dating him, not me.
"Honestly mother," I said opening my door. "Do you have a crush on him or something? Because I'm getting a little suspicious here." She opened her mouth to protest, but closed it when she saw me. "Can you zip me up?"
Her jaw dropped. I don't blame her. I mean, I did look hot, not gonna lie. My dress was a gold tube top with sequins and beads all around it, and once it reached the hips it flared out into nine layers of beautiful material. My hair was half up, half down, and all curled with a gold barrette to secure it.
She pretty much pounced on me. "Oh Susie, you look beautiful! My little girl's growing up so fast!"
"Mom! I don't have time for this. Can't you just zip me up?" She calmed down.
"Oh right. Of course." When she was done, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "Have a good time, alright? Prom is absolutely amazing."
"I will Mom. Promise." She gave me a hug and walked me down the stairs. When Paul saw me, his jaw dropped.
"Wow. You look absolutely amazing, Suze."
"You don't look half bad yourself." And he didn't. Actually, he didn't look bad at all. He looked amazing, even better than normal. There was no way I could keep my hands to myself that night. No way in hell.
He handed me a boutonnière and I pinned it onto him, and after he put a corsage on my wrist. Then he kissed me. Very nice.
"You ready to go?"
"Of course." I was so ready to go.
My mom was right. Prom was absolutely amazing. It wasn't like that horror movie "Prom Night" or whatever. There were no strange deaths and creepy stalkers in sight, and Paul was a complete gentleman. We surprisingly spent almost the entire night dancing, and we never left each other's sides, and I didn't mind at all. It truly was perfect.
Just then a slow song came on. It was "Time to be Your 21" by Alexz Johnson. I laid my head on his chest and never wanted to move.
"I could get used to this," he said. I looked at him. He was smiling. Man, he was gorgeous.
"Me too. Tonight has been amazing."
"Yes it definitely has." He kissed me. Paul and me have really gotten close these past few weeks. I told him I wanted to get to know him before Prom, and he made sure it happened. It started out with him walking me to a few of my classes at school and maybe going to get something to eat after school, to us hanging out pretty much every day. One day out of nowhere he just kissed me, and I kissed him back. Neither of us ever really asked the other out. We never had a certain day or a general idea of when we started really dating. We just sorta knew that we were. I liked it. Things were simple. I liked him, he liked me, and we were together. End of story.
"And I could definitely get used to that." This caused him to laugh. There was something about the way he laughed. Something that made him even more adorable.
I laid my head back on his chest, but I don't really understand what happened next. I felt a shiver or something down my back. It made me suddenly become cold and start shivering.
"Suze? Are you okay?" I looked up at him, and when I did it's as if I saw him in a new light. He looked even better now from when I looked at him just a few minutes ago. There was something else I saw in his eyes. I had an idea of what it was, but I had to make sure.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled. "It just.." I didn't know what to say at first, but I made it simple. "I love you."
He smiled and leaned in towards me. Surprisingly, he didn't kiss me on the lips. He kissed me tenderly on the cheek, and then made his way toward my ear.
"I love you, too."
"I had an amazing time tonight, Paul."
"So did I. Are you glad you agreed to go with me now?"
I laughed. "You know what? I guess I am."
This time he laughed. "Well that's good then." I couldn't help but smile at him. He was adorable.
"Yeah. Hey listen, wanna walk me upstairs?" I didn't tell Paul about the hotel room I had upstairs because I didn't want him to get the wrong idea or anything. I didn't get it so I could be a total cliché and lose my virginity on Prom night in a beautiful hotel room blah blah blah. My mom told me that I didn't have to be home that night because she knew there would be all night long parties, so there would be no point in even trying to give me a curfew because I wouldn't follow it anyways. I know there would be a party somewhere and I'd probably be wasted by the end of the night, so I got my own hotel room so I would have somewhere to myself and maybe a friend for the night.
When I saw room 301 I stopped in front of it.
"This is mine," I said bluntly. There was no use beating around the bush anymore.
"Oh." He looked confused. "You got a room?"
"Yeah. I had a feeling I would be wasted by the end of the night, so it seemed to make sense. The party's right down the hall." That was obvious. At that moment, we both looked down the hall towards the party. Some girl was yelling at her boyfriend involving something about him being all over some girl. Then she slapped him. Ouch.
"Looks like it'll be a good time. Wanna go now?"
"Yeah, just give me a few minutes. I have to go to the bathroom and then we can go."
"Alright. I'll just wait out here." I felt weird leaving him, but what could I do?
"I'll see you in a few minutes, ok?" I looked up at him.
"Fine by me." He gave me a quick kiss on the lips and smiled. I wanted more. I pulled him closer to me and he looked surprised. I kissed him. Hard, and long. My arms found their way around his neck and his found their way around my waist. This is the closest we have ever been, and I wanted more. I wanted to be closer to him. I made sure to never break the kiss.
But much to my dismay, we eventually broke apart, breathing very heavily, I might add.
"Wow," was all he said. I laughed and bit my bottom lip. Wow was right, very right.
"Do you wanna come in?" His head shot up. He looked shocked. I mean, he had a right to be. I was even surprised with myself at first for asking.
"What?" I couldn't help but smile.
"You know what I said." He was so tense and it was so adorable. I didn't understand why I was being so calm, but I wasn't complaining. I'd rather him be the crazy one right now instead of me. I'm sure him freaked out was a lot calmer than me freaked out.
"Are you sure?" he whispered. I nodded.
"I'm sure."
"Alright then." He kissed me on the lips and held my hand. From there, I led him into my hotel room. This would be a night I would never forget.
A/N: Heh yeah, that's it. I just have this feeling deep down in me that if Suze didn't have Jesse in her life, she would have fallen for Paul. Maybe it's true but maybe it's just that I absolutely love Paul. Who knows.
It turned out a lot mushier that I expected, but I'm over it. I hope it wasn't too bad and didn't turn out to be a huge waste of time. Since the book ended with them going to the winter formal, I wanted to end it with prom. In a way it's sort of my alternate ending for the last book. Review what you think.
