The stars outside shone brilliantly in the crystal night sky and the air itself was so calm and steady with only a soft, sweet breeze that was welcoming to the skin.
Steve stood by the balcony doors, watching Tony watch the sky. His lovers brown eyes shone brighter than any star Steve could see and the wonder in them resembled the wonder of a young boy's. It was almost like he was searching for something, yet at the same time he seemed calm and collected, taking in all the beauty of the night sky as if it were the first time he had seen it.
Slowly, Steve walked outside and joined Tony at the railing. He looked down to the city streets first, his breath taken away at how high they were, as it always was. But then Tony shifted closer to him so their arms that were resting on the rail were touching, and Steve looked up to Tony, his own look of wonder melting into a smile at the sight of his beloved smiling back at him.
To Steve, Tony's smile was worth all the stars above.
Steve leaned in and captured Tony's lips in the softest of kisses, slow and loving. He could feel Tony smiling into the kiss and it made his heart skip and his insides flutter with happiness. Steve just absolutely loved being able to make Tony smile; all he wanted to do was make him happy.
When they broke, Steve kept an arm around Tony's waist as they looked back out over the city, and their heads resting against each other. He couldn't keep his own dopey smile off of his face- not that he wanted to, mind you.
Besides him, Tony let out a small sigh, and before Steve could ask if everything was okay, he began talking. "When I was younger I'd sit outside watching the sky." Steve just hummed lightly, a sign for Tony to continue. It wasn't often that Tony spoke of his past, and so it piqued Steve's interest. "I was looking for you. Every night after Howard finished telling me a story about how great Captain America was and how I should grow to be just like him, I would go outside my window and I would look for you. Hoping you could teach me how to be you so my- so Howard would pay attention to me."
Steve swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. He wasn't expecting that, wasn't expecting something that would make guilt curl up in his stomach and make him feel sick, or something more to fuel his dislike for Tony's father. He turned his head to the side a bit and hid it in the crook of Tony's neck, closing his eyes as he planted a kiss there.
"I never expected you to come." Tony was saying, and Steve almost wished he would stop talking because these were horrible memories for Tony and Steve didn't want to face the fact that Tony had been through a terrible life. Not when he was here now with Steve in his arms, trying to kiss away all of that pain. But it was also good to hear Tony talk about these things, so again he stayed silent and let Tony continue. "But I wanted you to. I was always outside every night waiting." Steve closed his eyes tighter, wishing the guilt feelings away.
Tony tore his gaze away from the sky and turned in Steve's hold so he could look at him properly. Gingerly, Steve opened his eyes and faced him, but not before lacing their hands together. Tony's eyes weren't shining with wonder of a young boy anymore, they were shining with hurt, a broken promise from the past. A passing thought occurred in Steve's mind; did he have that same look of wonder whilst waiting for me? And he could almost perfectly picture a young Tony waiting under the stars. It was a beautiful and horrible thing to picture. He willed it away.
"I gave up on you, Steve. I hated you. I didn't want you to come anymore… except I did." Tony shook his head, pausing briefly. He tugged on their hands so that Steve stepped closer and now their foreheads were pressed together. Tony's eyes were closed now and Steve realised with horror that Tony was near to tears. "When you did come… You were even better than Howard said. And I hated you even more."
Would Tony please stop saying that he hated him? Steve was just about ready to cry himself, except he didn't, he couldn't. He held onto Tony tightly whilst he spoke and looked at him with the saddest, yet most loving gaze. He'd no right to cry, no right to be upset- of course Tony hated him, for his past or not. Steve hadn't taken an immediate liking to Tony either… He remembered with perfect clarity the insults they had exchanged, the words that neither of them could take back but now that every day were soothed with new words, new gazes and secret kisses and touches.
Steve wasn't upset for that, anyway. He was upset because Tony went through all of this and it was just so horrible. It was just worse that it was because of Steve that Tony had this childhood trauma.
"And now…" Tony opened his eyes and gazed back into Steve's. He wasn't crying, Steve noted, thank god for that. Steve didn't know if he could handle a crying Tony without breaking down himself.
"And now?" He prompted, voice soft, carrying a saddened tone.
"I still hate you."
But Tony's lips were now quirked up into a small smile and Steve knew he didn't have anything to worry about. Tony was back to hiding all of his feelings, keeping them bottled up until they came out at random moments like these. That was okay though, Steve could deal with that.
So he smiled and once again, he pressed their lips together, in a much stronger, needy kiss than the earlier one. Steve poured all his love into it, telling Tony that he loved him, that he was worth it, that Tony was the stars and beyond to him.
"I love you too, Tony." He half whispered against his lips, the dopey smile returning. Then Tony turned back to look up at the beautiful night sky, his eyes shining with wonder once more, his lips set in a soft smile. Steve moved so he was behind him and he wrapped his arms around him tightly, resting his chin on Tony's shoulder and loving the way Tony leaned back into his touch. Steve gazed at his star with nothing more than adoration. He was so, so happy with this man. "I love you so much." He whispered again, eyes travelling up to search the sky with his love. He was glad Tony wouldn't have to wait for him any more.
A/N: Let me know what you think! Hope you enjoyed it c:
