Bilbo Baggins gazed down at the stream his pony was drinking from, watching his reflection waver in the waves that resulted from the pony's drinking.
He was thinking about how he wished he was still in Erebor, and also about how he wanted to get home. It felt like his heart was in two places at once. It was terrible.
What was the point of going home if he was going to miss Erebor? If he was going to miss the Company, Thorin, his cousin? If he… if he was going to miss the adventure of it all?
"Bilbo." He lifted his head and found Gandalf watching him from the back of his horse. "You are deep in thought," the wizard observed.
Bilbo nodded. "I don't know where I want to be," he explained. "I -" He cut himself off and chuckled. "I'm sorry, Gandalf. We're so close to home."
"We are," Gandalf agreed. He glanced away from where Bilbo was seated on his pony and looked into the distance, towards where the Shire and Bag End lay waiting. He then turned to Bilbo again and saw the Hobbit was looking at the stream once more. "You don't seem overjoyed, as I thought you would be."
Bilbo shook his head. "I… I should be happy, shouldn't I?" he asked softly. "But I cannot be."
"And why is that?" Gandalf queried.
Bilbo stayed quiet for a moment. What was the biggest issue?
After a second, he sighed. "Cheyanne."
The wizard let out a breath. "What about her?"
"I shouldn't have let her make me leave," Bilbo answered. "She will be married as soon as the spring arrives, and I will not be there for it, though I should be."
Gandalf gazed at the Hobbit, waiting for more, but Bilbo was silent. "Bilbo, it is your choice," the wizard began. "You may turn around and go back the way you came."
Bilbo looked up from the water and turned wide eyes to Gandalf. "We have traveled all this way -"
"For naught, if you would rather be with your cousin."
Bilbo's eyebrows drew together and he turned away again. Gandalf watched him. After a long moment, the Hobbit shook his head. "No." He looked at Gandalf. "We're almost there. I shouldn't turn away now."
"That is you decision," Gandalf concluded. "We continue on to the Shire?"
Bilbo nodded once, and directed his pony away from the stream. A small smile lit his features as he thought of Cheyanne riding a pony in front of him, at the very start of their journey. After a time, he realized that he could ride the pony on his own, but he didn't want to get off the one they shared.
Gandalf saw the smile and formed one of his own. The poor Hobbit. He didn't want to return home. They both knew that. Still, it was up to Bilbo to realize it, and inform Gandalf when he had. The wizard would take him back. He'd told Cheyanne he would watch out for her cousin, and that was what he aimed to do.
Bilbo, however, needed to make the first move.
And when he did, Gandalf assumed, both Hobbits would be much better off.
