I was apparently reading too much 2x1 fanfiction. And it's wierd, because I'm writing as Duo, and he's having all of the same problems in this story that I'm battling with in real life. Only, I'm not sure if mine's going to turn out like his. Enjoy!


I woke up thinking about you today. Again.

People always say that you shouldn't give up on someone that you can't go one day without thinking about. I wish I could. I wish that I could tell the whole world that I won't give up on you. And in a way, I'm right. I don't think I'll ever give up on you. I think I'll always love you, just as much as I do right now, maybe even more.

But, y'know, it kills me to not know how you feel. You're impossible to read. I know, I know, you were trained that way. Perfect soldier, whatever. I can't see past the walls in your eyes. I wish I could.

My love for you is like a daydream. You're always in them. And in every daydream you have thoughts and words and actions. In truth, these notions of yours are well, yours. They're inherently yours. But they're not yours: they're mine. You say what I want you to say, what I want you to think, how I want you to feel. But I never know what you know. Not what you really know.

I can see your face in my mind. I can see your eyes, deep, and blue, and smoldering. It's so unfair that you can smolder when you're not even here. I make you smolder. Good gravy, you're sexy when you smolder.

Not fair, I thought to myself.

You've always been there for me, whether you'd like to admit it or not. Even after the war, you've helped me out. You keep sticking around. Maybe that's why I'm teasing myself like this.

I fell in love with you back in the war. I'm not entirely sure when. All I remember is that one mission, I heard you going out, and I was scared that you wouldn't come back. I had never been scared before. Not about that.

I got up off of my bed and went to my tiny bathroom sink. My braid was a disgusting mess because I had slept in it, so I undid it, brushed it out, and braided it back up. I stood there looking at myself in the mirror. I wouldn't say I was unattractive.

Just to you, I guess.

All I could see in my mind was your face. The short brown hair, the big blue eyes, your sharp chin and straight nose. You were perfect. The perfect soldier, right?

Oh stop fooling yourself. He doesn't love you. Get over it. He wouldn't worry about you if you got a firebomb thrown into your window.

I hoped with all of my might that it wasn't true, but I'm sure it was.

I was starting another mission today, and I'd be gone for a few weeks. Nothing particularly dangerous, but with my luck, something's gonna get blown up. Or worse, I'm gonna get blown up. Not like Heero'd care anyways.

Oh, to hell with him. He's just gonna put a bad start to my morning.

I walked out into the kitchen, and everyone else was already there. Wufei was at the counter, eating a bowl of cereal and reading some part of the newspaper. Trowa was fiddling in the refrigerator looking for something, and Quatre was at the stove, cooking what smelled like an omelette.

"Good morning Duo," Quatre said from his place over the stove. "Did your omelette wake you up?"

"My omelette?"

"Yes, your omelette. I was hoping to lure you out of that bed of yours so you didn't sleep through your mission."

He giggled a little and slid my omelette onto a plate.

"Thanks, Quat. You always know how to start my mornings off right."

Trowa had found the milk that he had been searching for and went back to his bowl of cereal on the table. I sat down next to him and inhaled my omelette. Cheese and mushrooms, my favorite. Quatre really did know how to start my mornings, even when they were hindered by my thoughts of Heero.

I got up, put my plate and utensils in the sink, grabbed my jacket and keys, and started towards the door.

"Oh, Duo?"

"Yes Quatre?"

"There was a note taped to the fridge for you this morning. I almost didn't see it, so I'm pretty sure you wouldn't have."

"Did you read it?"

"Nope. It's in an envelope. Looks like Heero's handwriting, but I'm not sure why he'd write you a note."

My heart jumped when Quatre said Heero's name.

I walked over to Quatre and took the note from his hand.

"Thanks Quat. You're totally right, I wouldn't have seen it."

I walked out the door to the house and hopped into my little silver car. It wasn't much, but it was mine. I almost couldn't fit into it anymore, but I wasn't ever going to give it up.

I sat in my car and fingered the note. It was most certainly Heero's handwriting on the front. He had written "02" on the card. I turned it over and opened the envelope. I pulled out a small piece of paper, the note that Heero had hand-written.

Duo,

Don't be an idiot. I don't want to come home with you not here.

If things get bad, call me. You always know where to find me.

If you don't come back when you're supposed to, I will come and find you.

Be safe.

I love you. I always have and I always will.

Come home soon.

- Heero


A/N: I told you! Too much 2x1 is not good for you.