Withering flowers dyed in red
Series: Kamen Rider Fourze (post episode 31/alternative ending)
Pairing: Gentarou/Kengo
Rated: M
Genre: Fluffy/Angst
Notes: I don't know how I managed to arrive 'till the end of this, it was supposed to be a sad story from the start to the end, but I'm not able to not give some sort of happy ending to my stories. This was written before the release of episode 32 and it has been the very first Toku-RP I made with Charlie, my "husband", as Gen-chan . I apologize for the lots of errors you'll find but English is not my first language ;_;
"Stop it, Utahoshi-kun… he's…"
"Don't you even dare to say it!" replied the boy, ignoring what the man in the room with him said, refusing to admit what the reality was.
"He's gone... " insisted the other, grabbing the younger by the shoulder and pulling away the arm with the Medical Switch on from the dead body in front of them.
He's gone.
Gone.
Gone…
"Kisaragi… you… fucking idiot!"
Kengo, while holding tight the cold hand of the other boy in his own, felt his heart breaking into smaller and smaller pieces and he was sure this time nothing could ever bring them together again. When his father died he thought his world was ended but then that boy arrived and day by day he taught him how to smile again… but now he was gone too.
"How am I supposed to live without you? How…"
…
A month passed and everyone in the Bu was almost resigned to what happened, every member but one: day after day slowly life was leaving Kengo too, without Gentarou around him it was like if he was living because he had to, not because he wanted to, and everybody, deep in their hearts, knew that his departure was only a matter of time.
"I'm trying so hard to keep on living… but I just can't… no more…"
It was a warm spring day and it seemed that nothing could have gone wrong but everything was just too calm and peaceful. When on that evening Yuuki said "Goodbye" to Kengo she clearly felt it: that one was the last time that she would ever see him alive.
"So the time is come…" she thought, dying a little bit more inside unable to stop tears.
Arrived at home Kengo managed to finish his homework in a couple of hours, not that he was paying much attention to them though and once he was done he was so tired that he couldn't wait to throw him in the bed.
"At least if I sleep I can stop thinking for a bit…"
Gentarou floated above Kengo's bed watching him sleeping, he seemed so sad even while he was asleep that the presence couldn't stop itself from trying to touch the other's skin with what remained of its hand.
"Kengo… what have I done…"
The boy suddenly woke up feeling that cold on his cheek. "I wonder where this icy draft comes from" he thought and immediately turned himself to the window direction thinking he forgot it open and he was quite surprised when he noticed it was closed.
"It can't be…"
"I'm here… I've always been here…" Gentarou lowered his head with a gloomy smile putting it in the curve of Kengo's neck imagining how warm had to be that skin.
Without thinking Kengo opened his arms trying to catch the cold that was surrounding him, terrified by the idea it may disappeared in every moment, in the deep of his heart he was sure to know what it was.
"Kisaragi… it's you, right? You idiot…"
If only Gentarou still had an heart probably at this point it would have start beating like crazy, but he couldn't do nothing but smiling, aware that no matter what, even if the other couldn't see him no more, he still was able to perceive him.
"Yes, but I'm not stupid!" he replied with fake anger, grinning sadly.
"Yes, but I'm not stupid" Kengo smiled a bit, imagining how the other would have replied if he still was alive. How many times did he hear those five words in the past and how painful was the thought that he wouldn't ever be able to listen to his voice anywhere but in his memories. He wouldn't ever be able to see Kisaragi smile at him again. He wouldn't ever be able to live his whole life by his side. He found himself in the middle of an uncontrolled crying while hitting the bed with punches.
"Yes, you are! Damn, you're the worst idiot ever! Only a stupid like you could die in such a way… What did you think while letting that asshole killing you? That we would have been fine even without you?"
"Every day I think of you and what I've lost… I deeply regret that choice but at that moment It was the only thing I could do… maybe you're right, after all I'm an idiot… an idiot that can't do nothing but watching after you from distance while the only thing I really want is to come back, living and become old together…"
"Or maybe… the stupid here is me. I believed we still have so much time that I've never clearly tell you that… that I… I loved you, Kisaragi. I've never thought that what happened between us was a joke and I'd give everything I have to be able to let you know it. You died and I've never made you happy just once…"
"I'm dead…" Gentarou replied hugging the other tighter with tears in his eyes "but when I passed away I was happy, I really was… you were the best thing that ever happened in my life." Thinking about it probably he started to be a little too joyful since the day that they've met for the first time, then his happiness reached a maximum when Kengo recognize him as a friend and finally he believed he was going to have an heart attack when, the day before his death, they shared their first kiss.
"You know, Kisaragi… at the beginning I couldn't stand you at all… you and all of that damn noise you bring along… but then all of you become so indispensable that often, while walking without thinking I end up outside of your home and I stayed there for hours undecided if ring that bell was the right thing to do or not… if only I was more honest with myself and with my feelings telling you how much I needed you not as a friend but as something more… yes, if I ever did it everything would be gone in another way and now probably you'd be here with me, maybe we'd be here arguing about the most stupid things but at least we'd be together… reality is I can't live without you, I can't…"
"I'm not so noisy as you said…" another gloomy smile "it was only my way to let you know I was there… for you…" he pulled again his hands on Kengo's shoulders deeply frightened by his last sentence "Don't even dare doing some bullshit" he whispered.
"I can't go on like this, I miss you too much…" a sudden and instinctive decision that didn't left space for any doubt "It would be great if you'd really be on the other side… waiting for me… Kisaragi… " he grabbed the cutter he used to finish a school project some hours before.
"No… Kengo… don't… you have to live…"
"You were my first and only love… I prefer dying than living without you…"
Two cuts on his wrists.
The only photo they take together held tightly in his hand while sheets were turning red.
Then silence and the pitch black.
…
"Come on, get up!"
The first thing that Kengo saw when he opened his eyes was a light so dazzling that he couldn't see anything.
"Where I am?"
He was desperately trying to see something between the shadows, hoping to recognize something or someone, when he felt a hand touching his hairs.
That touch… it could have been only a person.
Before realizing it the tears were already dripping from his eyes "Ki… Kisara…" he couldn't even finish to speak that the other shut him up with his mouth kissing him softly.
"Welcome back home, Kengo"
"Don't even try to let me behind again, or I'll kill you with my own hands!" "Really… you die for him and this is the only thing you're able to say…you dumbass…" he thought as he stop speaking.
"You'll never change…" said Gentarou smiling to the other boy "but this temper is one of the reasons why I've fallen for you…".
"I-idiot… stop saying embarrassing things!" replied Kengo blushing violently trying to escape from his embrace.
"I love you"
"I…I love you too… I'll always do…"
Another kiss, another smile… then hand in hand they reached the light.
Together.
Forever.
