A/N: I don't own Danny Phantom

Summary: A response to a challenge

The Challenge: Who knew Vlad's sister was real? Besides Vlad I mean. Vlad's sister wants him to watch his niece(s) and/or nephew(s)

Rules: It must be humor, Danny must show up at one point, none of the kids can have ghost powers but they can discover his lab and they have to discover his secret.

Maybe Kids AREN'T for Me

Vlad Masters was doing some paperwork. There were moments when being the mayor was a pain in the butt, but it was well worth it to make Daniel Fenton's/Danny Phantom's life/afterlife miserable

DING DONG

Vlad went to the door and opened it to see a VERY familiar face

"Alexandra?" he asked the woman at the door

"Hello Vladimir" she said in a tone that told him she still hated her full name.

Vlad raised his eyebrows at the woman and the four children that were with her.

"What brings you here?"

"My husband and I are in town and we're going to visit his sister. However, since he hasn't seen her in over 20 years, we figured we'd slowly break the news of the wedding first. Which means, I need you to watch the kids"

"Why me!" Vlad asked in a tone that made him winced. It sounded almost as if Daniel Fenton was possessing him

"It's the LEAST you can do after vanishing off the face of the earth and then not CONTACTING us for 21 years!" Alexandra nee Masters said with a motherly scolding tone. "Mom died because you worried her so much, she had a heart attack!"

"Fine. I'll look after your….children"

"Thanks Vlad. You're a life savor" Alex said handing the youngest, a 1 year old girl with brown hair. "Kids. Listen to your Uncle Vlad"

"Yes Mom" the other three chorused

"MAMA" the baby yelled

"Mama's going to be back in a few hours Sweetie" Alex told the youngest before turning to her brother. "If you need any help, Max is pretty good with the baby. However he's at the teenage rebellion stage so if he acts up, Steph can fill in. Bryan's only 7, but he's good about playing with his siblings and of course Mel here is a right little angel. Max. I'm serious. Behave"

"yes Mom" the boy said

"Don't you worry about a thing Alex" Vlad told his sister. "As mayor of Amity Park, I'm very good with children"

"Good" Alex said before giving her son another warning glance

No sooner did she get into the car and the door closed, the baby started screaming

"What the heck?" Vlad exclaimed jumping a bit

"I'll take her Uncle Vlad" Stephanie said as she took the baby and gently bounced her. "It's okay Melissa. Mama's coming back

Vlad stood back and looked at his nieces and nephews.

"Why don't you tell me about yourselves?" Vlad suggested

"I'm Max." the firstborn said. "I'm 14 years old and I DON'T need a babysitter"

"Ah. But I'm NOT a babysitter. I'm a caregiver" Vlad informed his nephew as he looked him over. The boy looked sort of familiar with the brown hair and violet eyes

"And I'm Stephanie. I'm 12 years old and I'm into science" the girl holding the baby said "Mom said that you were a science major in college"

"Before the accident that ruined my life" Vlad confirmed

"But would you have all this stuff if you didn't have the accident?" Max challenged

"Well…" Vlad said stumped

"I rest my case" Max said.

"He just met our other maternal aunt." Stephanie explained. "She doesn't like men too much."

Vlad nodded as he looked his niece over. She had his sister's blond hair and DARK blue eyes. She was the splitting image of her mother

"And I'm Bryan. I'm seven and I like video games." Bryan said, his mother's eyes shining under the head of brown hair

"Well, I have LOADS of video games for you to play with" Vlad said

"You play too?" Bryan asked

"Not really" Vlad said with a bit of a twitch as he still recalled having to buy all the video games at a convention due to Daniel Fenton's mood swings.

"And this is Melissa" Stephanie added while looking at the hiccupping baby "She only knows a few words. "'Mama,' 'Dada' 'Mack' which is Max, 'Tephie' which is me, and 'Ian' which is Bryan. She knows a few other ones but those are the big ones"

"Good to know" Vlad said "Well, I have loads of stuff to do so why don't I just show you kids where the video games are"

It didn't take long for Vlad to realize that perhaps this WASN'T a good idea as Bryan and Max had a lot of questions about some of the stuff

"Why in the WORLD would a bunch of people vote for you?" Max asked

"Here we go" Vlad said opening the door "Knock yourselves out…literally"

He had said that last bit under his breath.

"He doesn't like us, does he?" Bryan asked his brother and sister once Vlad was gone.

"He's the mayor Bryan. I'm sure he has a lot of important stuff to do." Stephanie told him

Max went over to one of the games and frowned

"They've been fried. These are useless" Max told his siblings

0000

Vlad had just barely gotten back to his desk when,

"Uncle Vlad" Bryan said

"What is it Bryan?" Vlad asked

"The games are broken" Bryan told him "Can we watch T.V.?"

"Do you want to watch stuff like the news?" Vlad asked knowing that would turn the boy off to that thought as he had his spy cams on his T.V.

"Don't you have any kid channels?" Bryan asked.

"Nope. No kids of my own" Vlad said

"Then can we make something in the kitchen?"

"Providing you don't blow anything up" Vlad said

Bryan left to inform his siblings that he got permission to do something

A half an hour later,

Vlad, noticing it was a bit TOO quiet, went down to the kitchen and found the entire place, including the four kids, a complete mess

"WHAT HAPPENED IN HERE!" Vlad exclaimed

"Uh…" the kids chorused as Melissa babbled

The next thing the kids knew, they were out in the backyard with the hose. Max was washing off his siblings, but Vlad didn't give them towels

"What on earth?" a voice came

The four kids turned and eyes bulged out

"OHMYGOSH!" Stephanie squealed "DANNY PHANTOM!"

"WOW!" Bryan exclaimed "YOU'RE REALLY REAL!"

"Can I have you're autograph?" Max exclaimed

Melissa squealed with joy

"Sure." Danny Phantom said looking highly confused as he floated down a bit lower. "What are you four doing at Vlad's?"

"He's our uncle" Stephanie said

Danny winced and put his hand on her shoulder

"You have my sympathies" he told her before turning her intangible and letting the water fall off of her.

He did the same thing for her brothers and sister so that they could go back in.

"You're going to want to go back in." Danny told them. "Skulker's out and he doesn't care if anyone's in the cross-fire"

He then pulled out three pictures with an eyeroll and handed them to the kids.

"Never thought this idea of Tucker's would actually come into use" he muttered before adding "Don't tell your Uncle about these. And be careful. My arch enemy, Plasmius, lives here too."

"Sure thing" Max said as his idol flew off

"Danny Phantom touched me and gave me his picture." Stephanie sighed

"I'd hate to see her reaction if he gave her his phone number" Max whispered to Bryan as he picked up Melissa and they headed inside with Vlad thinking they'd be out a few more hours to dry off

0000

The kids decided to explore the house a bit. They went into what seemed to be a library.

"Uncle Vlad sure does like the Packers" Max mused as he was looking at some football trophies while holding his baby sister

Melissa reached for one of the footballs

"What's up Mel?" he asked before noticing that one of them had a hinge. He moved the football and the fireplace moved to reveal a secret passage

"Uncle Vlad…you just got cool" Max said as Stephanie and Bryan gasped

The kids went down to the lab and gasped. It looked like something between a scientific lab and a torture chamber.

"Oh my gosh" Stephanie gasped. "Max. This is no ordinary science lab."

"Then what is it?" he asked putting down Melissa

"It's a paranormal-studies lab!" Stephanie gasped as Melissa stood up and toddled towards the closed portal and banged on the door

"A what?" Bryan asked

"Uncle Vlad studies ghosts!" Stephanie translated

"What are you four doing in here!" a voice said

The older three turned half expecting their uncle but gasped at the vampiric looking ghost looking rather dangerous

"We were exploring" Max said

The ghost then swooped down and grabbed the baby

"MELISSA!" the older three exclaimed

The baby giggled

"Unca Vad!" she squealed

Silence, save for the baby's giggles

"U…UNCLE VLAD!" Max gasped "YOU'RE a ghost!"

"I-I'm not your uncle!" the ghost denied

"Sure your not" Stephanie said. "Then explain why you have the same body build, same voice, same facial features…"

"Rats. You're intelligent" The ghost muttered before getting down to the floor. "Yes Children. Normally, I'm known as Vlad Masters. But in this form, I'm called Vlad Plasmius"

"Plasmius?" the older three asked

Flashback

"And be careful. My arch enemy, Plasmius, lives here too."

End Flashback

"Listen you!" Stephanie said getting a bit dangerous. "Uncle or not, if you harm ONE HAIR on Danny Phantom's head, I will PERSONALLY go into ghost hunting and hunt you down like a lion hunts a zebra!"

"Excuse me?" Vlad asked cocking his eyebrows up

"She's a Phantom Phan" Bryan explained. "We ALL are. Mom too."

Vlad groaned at his lack of luck

"Now, what's it going to take to not tell Mom?" Max asked in a sing-song tone

0000

Two hours later,

"UNCLE VLAD! I ASKED FOR NO TOMATO!" Max yelled at his uncle in the kitchen

DING DONG

"Thank goodness" Vlad sighed dressed in a pink apron while the kids were going through the same treatment Danny Fenton had gone through during the Vortex incident.

Vlad opened the door

"V-MAN!" a familiar booming voice came

The next thing Vlad knew, Jack, Maddie, Jasmine, and Daniel were walking into mansion with Alex and her husband Greg.

"Alex? What's the meaning of this?" Vlad asked through gritted teeth as the nieces and nephews came into the room looking just as confused

"Didn't I tell you?" Alex asked her brother innocently. "I met Greg after you had your accident."

"Greg's my brother" Maddie explained

"We're IN-LAWS!" Jack told Vlad

Danny Fenton turned to his cousins.

"Hi. I'm Danny Fenton. Apparently your cousin" Danny introduced himself

"I'm Max Lewis." Max introduced himself. "These are my siblings, Stephanie, Bryan, an Melissa"

"Have we met?" Stephanie asked as she shook Danny's hand

"I don't think so" Danny said innocently

"Danna Fantom" Melissa squealed

"WHERE?" Jack asked looking around

"Cute kid" Vlad laughed as he took his niece and handed Melissa over to Alex. Then he gave Danny a glare that read I don't know how you're involved, but I blame you

Danny shrugged innocently

"Hi Sweetie. Did you have fun?" Alex asked

"OST!" Melissa said pointing to Vlad

"Mel. Uncle Vlad isn't a ghost" Greg said

"Of course not!" Maddie said laughing

Danny and Jazz tried so hard not to laugh as Danny gave Vlad a How the heck did you screw THIS up? Look

Meanwhile, Max, Stephanie, and Bryan were smirking at each other.

"That's what they think" Stephanie sang quietly.

Vlad, having heard his niece due to his ghost powers, groaned. Maybe having his own kids WASN'T such a good idea. After all, Danielle ran off and he could barely handle his own nieces and nephews without being turned into the servant.

The end

A/N: I wasn't sure which Danny you meant, Ghostanimal, so I made both appear. I hope you liked my little twist with Vlad's brother-in-law being Jack's brother-in-law.