A/N: This is going to be a collection of oneshots and drabbles that I write, because I'm too lame to think up of a multi-chapter story. Hopefully you will like these! And so without further ado I present to you an oneshot about the esteemed Black brothers on the night Sirius leaves.


B l a c k C o f f e e

Regulus and Sirius Black

(he likes his coffee black; its bitter, disgusting and completely real)

He sips his coffee slowly, allowing it to burn and slither down his throat. He knows that it is stupid to drink coffee when he has insomnia, but he doesn't particularly care. Because tonight he is waiting. Waiting for his traitorous brother to sneak down the steps and escape. Escape from the confines of their ever pressuring family. Escape from the fine china and cold stares of the dinner table. Escape from their ideals and ways. And he wants to scream because of it. Because he can never escape, but the brother can. Its not fair, but what has been in his life?

He hears footsteps coming down the stairs and he knows its his brother. Funny that the brave Gryffindor brother who can do anything, waits for a night all alone to escape. Like he wouldn't be able to if his mother was there to stop him. The footsteps stop and a figure enters through the door.

"Forgot you were here Reg," the brother says softly. Another sip of the coffee and a moment of silence.

"I'm not surprised. So you're leaving? Convenient of you to leave when mother and father are out. I guess you wouldn't be able to stand the apathy mother would have towards your absence." The brother puts on a sad smile, almost one of pity.

"Always the cruel one, Reg"

"Always the hypocrite Sirius. Calling me Reggie here but when you are around your friends I become that Slytherin git. But what can I expect from the Black that puts on the Gryffindor mask?"

"Its not a mask, Reg. And I'm not a Black anymore, I've given up those ways." And he laughs at it, because his brother has never gotten it. But the brother has always been an idealist, while he was always a realist. He perceives and knows what's real and that's all he cares about, not the fancy notions of Sirius.

"You can't escape being a Black, Sirius. You can try to run away, you can try to play the hero but in the end you will still be darker, you will still be more manipulative, you will always be less of a hero because it was not a role you were meant to play. Why can't you accept that? Why can't you accept that for however much you try, you will always be tainted? You can never be the ultimate good guy, the ultimate hero, because you are a Black and that's how we are."

"Reg," his voice is like a whisper "I can try. I can try to be good, can't I? No, I will never be the hero I want to be. But I can try as hard as possible to be that hero." A silence follows and he sips from the drink. He knows Sirius is being stupid. You can't just run away from the Black household. However he can't help but like the idea of trying to be a hero, because it gets hard being constantly on the grey side. That's where he is, right? Neither being completely altruistic and fighting against the menace of Voldemort, but not quite believing and truly being as evil as the Dark Lord is. And then he starts to shake his head; he is the Dark Lord's supporter and needs to stop listening to his brother's idealistic notions…But it is oh so tempting.

Maybe the brother sees his indecision, or maybe the brother truly believes that there is still a bit of the brotherly bond they once had (Sirius is indeed the optimistic one), but whatever the reason he gives him a choice.

"You can escape too, you know." That's all Sirius says. And he wishes the brother hadn't, because now he really has a choice. It becomes clear that he can just leave the expectations and person he doesn't want to be. And he wants to. He wants to go with Sirius and forget everything and never have to worry again…

But it can never be. So he just shakes his head, stares at his coffee mug and tells himself over and over that he would never go with a blood traitor like Sirius. He hates Sirius, he hates Sirius, he hates Sirius…

He doesn't realize that the brother left until he hears the door slam. That's also when he first realizes that there are tears on his cheek. He wipes them away, and can't believe that he is so weak. So he lies to himself some more and tells himself that he got something in his eye. That he couldn't be more than pleased that that filth has left the house. That he is glad that he can be the true Black successor.

And he tells himself this over and over again as he goes up the stairs and back into his bedroom. The coffee mug is left on the table

(the next morning he throws the mug away, claiming that there is a chip in it. kreacher doesn't bother reminding him that he can just fix it up with magic)


A/N: Ok, I took quite a few creative liberties with this story, and it may not be entirely cannonly factual (does that even make sense?) but for now I'm choosing to ignore that and all its many flaws so I can post. Please read and review, to tell me what I can fix so I can bear that in mind for future stories :).