So, for awhile now beckerbell has just been absolutely wonderful to me, and I wanted to do something to thank her. This in no way is good enough to properly convey my thanks, but I hope you enjoy it all the same.
(Please forgive any typos. I had a limited amount of time to type this.)
/
Thor is so focused on Loki he does not notice her until Frigga is smoothing Loki's hair back from his sweat soaked forehead. Loki immediately seems to forget Thor exists, gaping up at their mother with such pure shock Thor is certain no one has ever managed to ignite such surprise in his husband before.
The shock wears off as quickly as it came, and Loki sits up like a lightning bolt, causing both Thor and the healers to cry out. But for Loki, they might as well not have been there. He clutches to Frigga as if he were a child running to her for comfort after a nightmare. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he keeps repeating, intermittently interrupted with, "I didn't mean it."
Frigga holds him to her chest, making soft shushing noises, displaying that eternal understanding and calmness Thor only hopes he will be able to imitate with his children. "Shh, darling. It's alright, it's alright now. Let's not forget why we're here." She pushes Loki back so he can see the smile on her lips. "I only have one day, and I would like very much to meet my grandchildren."
Loki's eyes water as he looks down at his swollen stomach. "What if they do not come fast enough?"
"They will," Frigga assures him. "They are ready, you just need to bring them into the world now."
Loki scoffs but allows himself to be leaned back against the mountain of pillows that has been prepared for him. "That's easy for you to say. You only had to deliver that one." Loki jerks his head to Thor, who smiles at him despite the glare Loki is giving him. "I have three to push out."
"Yes, but look at him. Thor was a very large child."
Thor's mouth drops open in mild outrage, but Frigga levels that smile at him, and he feels nothing but warmth. She moves around the bed and pulls him into a tight hug, placing a kiss on his cheek. For a minute, the world smells like her, and Thor is so lost in memories, he feels a profound loss when she pulls away. "I am so proud of you, Thor."
Before he can respond, Frigga has swept towards Eir, asking what she needs done. Thor stares at her, drinking in the sight of his mother, here and whole once more, before Loki's sharp cry pulls him back. Thor turns back to his husband, grasping one of Loki's hand in his.
"I hate you," Loki growls out, following up with another cry. "I hate you so much. I never should have let you put these little parasites inside me."
"I know," Thor answers to each indignation, brushing back Loki's hair and kissing his cheek and fingers.
Loki eventually sighs in exasperation, his head lolling to the side. "Oh do shut up, you fool. I do not want to hear you speak if your vocabulary has been reduced to two words."
"I know," Thor repeats, a chuckle reverberating in his chest, as Loki rolls his eyes at him.
.
It takes hours of screaming, of straining and pushing, before the first child finally drops into Frigga's waiting arms. He whines softly, not at all happy with the brightness outside his mother's womb, but he is whole and healthy, and Thor has no idea until now that this level of happiness is possible.
Frigga wipes away some of the mess left on the baby's skin before setting him against Loki's chest. Loki looks down at the small creature, their son, their firstborn, in absolutely disbelief. Very slowly his hands come up to cradle the newborn, handling him with such care. "Look, Thor," he whispers, not taking his eyes from the babe.
Thor can feel the tears running down his face, but he makes no move to wipe them away. They are evidence of the pure joy he feels in his heart, and he would have all the Nine Realms see them. "I see him, Loki. He is beautiful."
Loki nods, half distracted. "Of course he is."
"Loki, there are two more coming," Frigga reminds him, sounding truly sorry for having to interrupt.
"I don't want to let him go," Loki complains softly.
"That is understandable, darling, but you must."
"Let me have him, Loki," Thor urges. He lifts his son from Loki's arms when no protest is given, but Loki looks less than pleased about the whole situation. Thor has a feeling that his willingness to comply has to do with the return of the labor pains, Loki's lips a thin line as he strains against it.
The tiny creature, his son, his beautiful son, blinks up at him for a moment, taking in the large bulk of his father, before shutting his eyes tight once more. His son tries to turn his head to hide in the crook of Thor's arm, but his eyes snap open and he looks up at Thor in wonderment when he feels Thor's chest move with the vibrations of his laughter. "He is so small."
"He is a newborn!" Loki yells at him, which quickly devolves into a scream.
"You need to push, Loki," Eir commands in a firm tone.
"I know, you irritable cow!" Loki shouts back at her. "What do you think I have been doing?"
Thor very reluctantly hands his son over to one of Eir's assistants and returns to his husband's side. "You can do this, Loki."
"Of course I can," Loki snaps at him. "Now if you all would stop -ah!- patronizing me!"
Another push, and their second child comes screaming into the world. Unlike her brother, their first daughter has no problem voicing loud displeasure at the experience of her birth. A boom of thunder follows, answering her scream. Thor is certain his smile is going to split his face in two at some point, but he does not care. Loki, however, drops back on the pillows with a pout. "Not another one," he whispers under his breath.
"She is glorious," Thor assures him, helping Loki to hold her when Frigga places her against Loki's chest. "Look at her."
"Yes," Loki answers. His head is heavy against Thor's shoulder, and his eyes are drooping closed. "Thor, I can't do it. I can't."
"Shh." Thor holds their daughter in one hand, wiping away Loki's tears with the other. "Of course you can. You are Loki, you can do whatever you want."
"Not this," Loki chokes out over a sob. "She is going to kill me."
"Don't say that," Thor responds with immediately, his heart clenching in fear. "You will be fine, Loki, you and our children."
Loki shakes his head in protest, but Frigga is kneeling beside him once more. "Darling, darling, look at me," she orders in that same calm voice.
It takes him a minute, but Loki does as he is bid. "You have to be strong, otherwise this last child cannot come into the world. You want to meet her, don't you?"
"Yes," Loki answers, voice broken. "But-"
"But nothing," Frigga silences him. "You can do this, Loki. And once it is over, you will have three beautiful children to love and hold."
Loki nods tiredly, apparently having lost the ability to answer vocally. He reaches out for Thor, who hands off their daughter, watching wistfully as she joins her brother, and presses as much of himself against Loki as possible without being in the way.
Their third child, another beautiful daughter, takes very little time, eager to be reunited with her siblings. Loki drops back onto the pillows when it is over, curling up against Thor with his last bit of strength. "I did it," he whispers, an edge of his old viciousness creeping in.
"You did," Thor answers, kissing the top of his head. "You did wonderfully."
Loki doesn't answer. Frigga has placed their daughter on his chest, and he can do nothing but stare at her. After a long moment he finally whispers in horrified shock, "She is blue."
"She is beautiful," Thor counters the denial in Loki's voice.
"But Thor," Loki continues in the same small voice, "she is blue."
"She is our daughter."
"She will be loathed by all of Asgard! They will know I am Jotun, they will…Thor, she is going to be hated. They will hate her because of me."
"Loki, look at me," Thor demands. When Loki refuses, he grips Loki's chin, gently but insistently making Loki look at him. "Do you hate our daughter?"
Loki looks startled, glancing down at the blue bundle in his arms. "No."
"Do you love her?"
Loki sighs, melting into Thor's touch. "Yes."
"Then we will never let her forget it. Every second of every day, she will know she is loved. Alright?"
"Alright," Loki whispers. He snuggles up to Thor's large body, holding their daughter close. Tentatively she opens her eyes, revealing bright blue instead of red. There is no denying they are Thor's eyes.
"They are all beautiful," Frigga says softly, sitting on the bed next to her sons. Their other daughter is in her arms. "And they are all healthy."
Loki takes their daughter, settling her in his other arm next to her sister. But Frigga is not deprived of a baby for long before Eir hands Frigga her grandson. She looks so happy, and Thor can hardly believe she is here.
"Mother, not that I am unhappy to see you, but how have you returned to us from Vahalla?" Thor asks, fingers brushing through Loki's hair as he looks between his children and his mother.
"Your father. Oh, don't give me that look," she directs at Loki's glower. "He used the last of his powers to bring me back for this one day, so that I might see the first of my grandchildren."
"Your only grandchildren," Loki mutters. "Thor will be lucky if he ever gets to touch me again after this."
Thor pouts, but Frigga's bright laughter echoes through the room. "Seeing as I said the same after Thor's birth, I have reason to doubt the validetty of that statement."
Loki grumbles, ignoring them in favor of cuddling his daughters.
"You should talk to him," Frigga directs to Thor. "He will enter his final Odinsleep this evening, and you will well and truly be King."
Thor nods and takes his son from Frigga's arms. "No!" Loki sits back up suddenly. "I do not want him near my children!"
"Loki." Frigga touches his shoulder, smoothly easing the tension from Loki's body. "He knew this would be the one gift you would accept. Allow him this, just once."
Loki is still hesitant, turning pleading eyes to Thor. "You know I will allow no harm to come to any of our children."
Loki sighs as if he being heavily put upon, but Thor knows he has won. "Very well, but I want them where I can see them."
Thor cradles his son carefully as he walks to the center of the room. He calls out for the guards to open the doors, three small sets of eyes snapping open at the sound of his booming voice. He hears Loki's grumble as the doors open, admitting the Allfather. Thor is stunned into silence. He had seen his father only this morning, but the Odin that stands before him is not the Odin of a few hours ago. He is withered and frail, merely a shell of his former self. Frigga had told them he'd used his power, but it doesn't truly register until now. This day will be the last he has with his parents.
Odin meets him halfway into the room, close enough for Loki to keep his eyes on them, but far enough away for him not to feel distressed. "Your grandson," Thor presents, finding no reason to keep the joy from his voice.
It is rare for his father to smile, Thor can count the times he remembers seeing it on one hand. But when Odin sees his grandson, the weariness seems to drop away and his lips turn upward. "May I hold him?"
The last thing in the world Thor wants right now is to let go of his son, but he reminds himself that this is Odin's only chance, and reluctantly hands over his son. Odin holds him with practiced ease, waving his fingers in front of the babe's face until they are grabbed and brought close to the little face.
Thor looks back over his shoulder to offer a reassuring smile to Loki. Loki tries to glower, but the birth of their children has put him in too complacent a mood for it to have any power. He leans against Frigga's shoulder, their voices soft so as not to disturb the children. Thor has always known that his mother loved him, but there were times when he knew he did not share the same bond with her as Loki did. There is a sharp pain when he sees it now, but he pushes it aside, refusing to allow it to spoil this day.
"Father, thank you. Loki needed this," he says softly so as not to be overheard.
"As did you, I expect." Odin manages to tear his eyes away from the baby in his arms to look at Thor. "Ask me what you would."
Thor isn't at all surprised that his father sees right through him. "What now?"
"Well, for me," Odin answers slowly, his eyes going back to his grandson, "I will join your mother in Valhalla. My time is done, and there can only be one king in Asgard." He shifts the baby to one arm, freeing the other for a heavy hand to rest on Thor's shoulder. "As for you, you were born for this, Thor. I would not be leaving if I did not think you truly ready. You will be a great king, Thor, and a good father."
They are simple words, but they have a profound effect on Thor. Given everything that has happened for them to get to this point, it means much that his father has such faith in him now. "Again, I must thank you," he responds, his voice tinged with a dozen emotions.
His son, who has been mauvering Odin's finger to his mouth, interrupts them with an indigent cry at the discovery that there is no food to be found there. Both men chuckle, the baby squawking again as if he knows he is the source of their amusement. "You will need your mother for that, young one," Odin tells him as he hands him back to Thor.
Loki is only too eager to have his son back in his arms, and doesn't even protest when Odin wanders over to look at his granddaughters.
.
"He wanted very much to stay awake until you left." Thor brushes his fingers against Loki's cheek. Normally such a touch would wake Loki instantly, but his husband is exhausted. Thor doubts even Ragnarok could wake him at this point.
"He birthed three children today. He needs to rest," Frigga answers in a quiet voice. She gazes fondly at her sons, and at her three grandchildren tucked into their crib together. "I am happy for you, both of you. I feared…" her voice trails off, but Thor has no need for her to voice it. For a long time he feared the same thing.
"We have missed you." Thor reaches out to grasp his mother's hand.
Frigga smiles at him and gently squeezes back. "And I you, but I am happy. You have no need to worry over me."
Thor returns her smile, not needing to say anything else. Frigga's very presence seems to have lifted a burden from Loki's shoulders, and it has lightened Thor's heart. There were things left unspoken between them, things better left in their darker days that tried to steal their way into their present. They will never talk of these things for fear of everything falling apart, but now it feels like they do not need to. That terrible force that was trying to shred their relationship has been vanquished by the radiance that is their mother and her boundless understanding.
Odin's footsteps are heavy as he comes up behind Frigga, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It is time."
Frigga pats Thor's hand once more, leans over to kiss Loki's cheek, and walks over to the crib. She kisses all three children and whispers, "I will be watching over you," before rejoining her husband. It is a quick affair, but the memory burns its way into Thor's mind, and he knows he will cherish it the rest of his days.
The first rays of dawn break through the windows. Day spills its way across the floor, and in the light the forms of Odin and Frigga break apart, leaving Thor's family smaller, but no less happy.
"She's gone," comes Loki's tired voice.
Thor looks down to see his husband blinking sleepily at the spot where their parents had been moments ago. "Yes." He bends down to kiss Loki's lips, Loki weakly returning it with what energy he can summon. "You should get some more sleep, Loki."
"Only if you join me," Loki demands, clinging to Thor's warmth.
Thor laughs as he pulls back the covers to lay next to Loki. "I do not think that such a burdensome task."
"It is only the first of many things I will demand, and of which you will give me seeing as I just birthed your spawn." Loki curls into the crook of Thor's arm, pale fingers sliding across his chest until they rest over Thor's heart.
"'Spawn'?"
"Do not argue semantics with me right now. Sleep."
Thor laughs again, kissing the top of Loki's head. "As you wish, my love."
