Title: The Tapestry

Summary: In which Feliciano is much more observant than everyone gives him credit for. (Main pairing SpaMano with implied PruIta. T for language and implied sex.)

A/N: Happy Easter everyone! Have some SpaMano! (Spring break means this authoress gets lots of time in which to update a certain fic I've been neglecting.)

Ring.

Ring ring.

Ring ring ring ri-.

"Somebody better be dead or dying or you will be."

"Good morning to you too, fratello~!"

Lovino bolted up straight in bed, disturbing the cocooned lump of blankets and Spaniard beside him.

"Feliciano, the hell?! It's like…ten in the morning…Why are you calling me up so early, damn it?!"

The younger Vargas simply laughed and toyed with the cord on the wall phone he insisted on keeping.

"Oh, fratello. There's no need to be so cranky, you sleepy head~. I just wanted to see how you are because I haven't heard from you since the wedding and Gil said he hasn't been able to get through to Brother-in-Law Toni~!"

"We've been…busy…moving…"

"Well I think I'll visit you, ve~. See you later today~!"

"THE FUCK?!"

Click.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck…" Lovino grumbled, getting up.

He nudged his bed partner, looking around for his pants that had been carelessly discarded at some point the night before. The lump groaned and burrowed into the sheets, trying to ignore the obvious cue to get the fuck up.

"Antonio, get up and get the hell out of the house. My brother's coming over and I need to clean and not have you here."

"But Loviiiiiii-"

"Don't you fucking 'but Lovi' me or 'Til death do us part' is going to be a lot fucking sooner than you planned."

Antonio sighed, getting up and dutifully dressing before kissing is irate husband's head and taking his leave of their relatively small house. Lovino snapped quickly to cleaning every room and trying to make it look like the couple actually gave a shit about the neatness of their home.

In truth, they had been married for around two months now and in that time neither really had the time or energy to argue over who vacuumed or who did the dishes. It was hard enough deciding who got to make dinner and whether it was going to be Spanish or Italian.(They more often than not settled for crappy Chinese take-out from the shady shop down the street.) Lovino grumbled the entire time, carefully dusting over picture and useless knick-knacks before his (ridiculously nit-picky) brother arrived.

At exactly half-past three, the doorbell rang and Lovino nearly fell off his bed where he had been standing to hang a large random tapestry he had found in the attic. He hated the damned thing, from the curled corners to its musty smell. He glared at the hated piece of wall decoration before hopping down and bounding to the door.

Upon opening it, he was tackled to the ground by a very excited Feliciano. After five full minutes of swears in strands of English, Spanish, and (obviously) Italian, he managed to detach the younger and stand up.

"Wow, you sure know lots of swears, Lovino~!" he giggled, watching his brother's vain attempts to fix his clothes after his attack.

"Well no fucking shit, asswad. Now why the hell can't you just call ahead like a normal person?!"

"I just wanted to surprise you…"

'No. Not the fucking puppy eyes, shit shit shit he's going for the puppy ey-agh!' Lovino's eye twitched as he hastily looked anywhere but his pouting little brother.

"…Fine, whatever. I guess I'll show you around if you really want…"

"Yay~!" Felicano's eyes lit up and the crocodile tears vanished from sight.

The elder facepalmed and led his curious visitor around the small, one-story house in a half-assed attempt at a tour. The younger, for his part, stayed silent (well, silent as is possible for him) and didn't mention the crooked dishtowels on the oven handle in the kitchen or the crooked pictures in the hall. Eventually, the duo ended up in the bedroom which had been meticulously cleaned. Lovino excused himself and went to the bathroom, leaving Feliciano to look around.

Immediately, his gaze was drawn to the bed, more specifically, to the absolutely horrible wall hanging behind the headboard. The dark, saturated colors and tackily ornate style didn't match the airy, simplistic style of the room his brother had designed. Suspicious, Feliciano peeked behind the tapestry only to erupt into an uncontrollable fit of giggles.

As if he could sense something going on, Lovino rushed back into the room only to have his face morph into a mask of mortification when he discovered his baby brother holding the horrible attic tapestry and laughing at the wall.

There, where the wall-rug from fucking hell had been hanging, was a distinct line of chipped paint, just in line with the headboard of the bed. Small scuffs of paint from the metal headboard made their presence known against the shock-white drywall that had, until around two months ago, been painted dark red.

"Wow, fratello~," an evil little smirk crossed Feliciano's lips as he turned to face his brother who was currently standing there frozen with a stream or unintelligible noises pouring from his mouth, "looks like Gilly was right, you and Big Brother Toni do like to do it pretty hard~."

Feliciano Vargas was banned from the Vargas-Carriedo household for the next ever.