Here begins a series of standalone fic(let)s from anonymous prompts that I've been receiving lately on tumblr. I'll be adding a chapter/story as they're written. Most of the ones I've received so far involve babies or children, so if that's not your cuppa, I'm sorry...maybe people will send me other prompts not about babies or children. Ha.

This series will be rated T for now (mostly because of language so far, but also because I'm not sure what future prompts may be...).


Prompt: Potty training their rambunctious two year old was NOT easy. A two year old little girl who was half Jane was A LOT to handle. Maura comes in and sees Jane sitting on the baby's potty chair.


"Godddd, Maddy, no!" Jane cried as the dark-haired mini version of herself stood in front of the plastic white potty training chair - that Maura had insisted was the crème de la crème of potty training – and peed toward the chair like a boy. The result was a disaster and Jane wanted to repeatedly hit her face against the wall.

But leave it to her fiancée to do three weeks' worth of research to find the best make and model for something as stupid as potty training. All Jane's Ma and Pop did was sit her on a normal toilet and make sure she didn't fall in.

"Maddy, baby," Jane said softly as she quickly tried to clean up the mess. "You know when Mama and Mommy have to potty? And we sit on the big potty? You gotta sit like Mama and Mommy, okay?"

The little girl pouted. "But Mama! Dat's not how TJ goes to da potty! I wanna do it like him!"

"I know, honey, I know," Jane replied soothingly, rubbing Maddy's back. "And I know Mama's gonna kill me for saying this, because gender roles and whatever, but little girls have to potty like us, so we don't make a mess. TJ uses the potty like that because he's a boy and that's how he doesn't make a mess."

"But…"

"Look, I'll show you." Quickly Jane pushed down her pants, underwear included, and sat on the offending plastic chair. The chair sagged slightly under the weight. "You just gotta—"

"Jane! What are you—"

"Mommy!" Maddy cried excitedly, turning immediately toward the open bathroom door and making a beeline for her mother's knees, hugging them tightly.

Jane shot up in an instant, pulling up her underwear and pants all at once. "Mommy's home! Off duty now! Love you both, bye!" She brushed past her soon-to-be wife into the hallway and rushed toward the stairs.

"Jane Rizzoli, you stop right there!"

Approaching the top of the stairs, one hand on the banister, Jane froze, and with a groan, turned to face the music.

"Care to explain why you were sitting on Madeleine's potty chair, knowing that you are more twice the weight limit?" Maura glared, hand on hip. "Not that money particularly matters, but it was still expensive!"

Madeleine suddenly giggled and Maura looked down at her. "Mama said I had to potty like you and her, but I wanna potty like TJ!"

"Oh dear," Maura said softly, looking up at Jane.

"Yeahhhh," Jane replied without enthusiasm. "That piss-soaked towel in the bathtub? All yours, babe."

"Jane! Seriously, language!"

"Maura, piss isn't a bad word."

"It's too vulgar for a two year old, Jane."

"Oh ho, and urinate is so much more appropriate!" The brunette rolled her eyes.

"It's the proper term, Jane," Maura sighed and changed the subject slightly. "How many times did she use the toilet training chair today?"

"Uhhhhhm," Jane replied 'thoughtfully.' "None?"

"Jane," Maura groaned. "We've been trying to train her for two months and she's still only successfully used the training chair three times!"

"Hey, the special fancy chair was your idea. I told you she'd be just fine doing it the way I learned," Jane shot back. "On the real toilet with m&m's as a reward."

"Mommy," Maddy interrupted with a tug to her mother's skirt. "What's a m&m?"


They switched to Jane's potty training method the next day.

Madeleine Rizzoli-Isles was potty trained within two weeks.

And Jane never let Maura live it down.