NOTE : THE AUTHOR DOES NOT OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING : Sieur-de-Coulonge High and it's students, Miss Belec, Microsoft, Bill Gates, Jennifer Lopez, JLO's ass, Mini-Me, Austin Powers, Joe C, Kid Rock, Zippo lighters, WWE, The Rock, a 12-guage, Sébastien Desloges, cinder blocks, a life of anything associated with the above.

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Mini-Me was walking inside Sieur-de-Coulonge High School (actual place). He was extremely hungry. So, he decided to get get some grub at the cafeteria. Please note that he had the muchies because he just smaoked a joint with some students.

When he was about to order, he realized that the prices were jacked up 25 and 35 cents. So, he decided to see the manager/lunch lady and complained about the price hike. The manager asked Mini-Me if his cock could touch his ass. Proudly, Mini-Me said that he could. What he didn't know is that was a trick question. So, she told hiom to go fuck himself and that the prices would stay the same. She slammed the door in Mine-Me's face.

Mini-Me did go fuck himself, then got tired of it and phoned some friends for help. A week later, Bill Gates, Sébastien Desloges (the world's smartest man), The Rock and Jennifer Lopez came to help Mini-Me. So, the five went and told off the lunch lady, Miss Belec (actual name). They all said the price was too high. So they all decided to take her on, one at a time.

The first challenger was Mr. Desloges. Using her quick lunch lady powers, Miss Belec reached under the counter and pulled out a 12-guage double- barrelled shotgun. She shot him right in the nuts. Tired of suffering, Sébastien shot himself in the head.

Secondly, Jennifer Lopez took up the challenge. But, she instantly got shot and died. Bill Gates was very confident. But, he too got shot. Hence, the Rock ran away, screaming like a little girl.

There was only one thing left to do. Mini-Me called up this best friend and ultimate weapon, Joe C. (You know, Kid Rock's midget) Miss Belec put down her gun. Joe C. and Miss belec were in a staredown. Joe C. jumped and bit her arm. The lunch lady tried to defend herself my spitting in his eyes. He let go and tripped her up. Joe C. got a cinder block and chucked it at Miss Belec's head. Since she was unconscious on the floor, Joe C. took adavantage. He dumped gasoline on her body. Then, he took Mini-Me's zippo and torched Miss Belec.

Ever since, Joe C. was in charghe of the cafeteria. He cut the prices in half and gave out coupons at will. The students ate happily ever after.

WRITTEN BY SANDIE B. STOGELESSE (spot the anagram)

Note : If you can figure out the anagram, the author will give you 5 Euros, even though he's from Canada.