"What the hell were you thinking?" My father yelled at me. "You know what kind of position I have in this city yet you take ever chance you can to embarrass me. I am trying to increase funding for drug awareness in the schools and my own daughter has a stash of pot in her room."
"What the hell were you doing snooping in there!" I screamed. "You invaded my private space and that is far worse than anything that I have ever done."
"I can't handle this anymore." My stepmother spat. "This daughter of yours belongs in reform school. She is a little hellion."
"Shut up!" I yelled at her. "You know nothing about me, you haven't even tried to get to know me! I hate you"
"Don't talk to your mother like that."
"She is not my mother. My mother is dead."
"That's it Mika pack your things you are going to stay with your grandmother." My father yelled.
"Fuck you." I said as I stormed up the stairs. I slammed my bedroom door as I walked past the mirror on my vanity I didn't recognize the reflection. I was extremely pale; I dyed my blonde hair black. I really hated the way I looked and felt. I picked up my hairbrush and threw it at the mirror. I started to clean up the glass and I cut my finger and watched the crimson fluid against my white skin. For the first time in months I cried.
The next morning I was off to the airport with my dad. We barely spoke, as I was still angry that he was making me live with his mother. I didn't know her very well I just knew that she was a real battleaxe when it came to children. I would much rather go to reform school than live with her on her farm in Hicksville North Carolina. I didn't even say good-bye when I got out of the car. I grabbed my bags and plane ticket and went on my way. The flight was really uneventful as I slept most of the way there from California.
After landing and disembarking I collected my luggage and saw a scrawny teenager holding a sign with my name on it. I stood in front of him. "I'm Mika Radford." I stated.
"Oh I'm
sorry, your grandmother told me you were a blonde. I'm Shane by the way."
"Whatever. Let's get the fuck
out of dodge." I said as I started walking towards the exit. Shane followed.
"So why are you here?"
"I do odd jobs for your grandmother and she asked if I would pick you up from the airport. She doesn't like driving in the city if she doesn't have to." I followed him to a little non descript hatch back. He threw my luggage in the back and now it was fun fun fun. A three-hour drive to grandma's farm with a complete stranger. I was hardly impressed. I slumped up against the door giving the hint that I was not going to be easy company. Shane sighed as he started the engine and we headed to my grandmother's farm. "You know the trip would go a hell of a lot faster if you and I were to get to know each other." He said about an hour into the trip.
"I really could give a shit about getting to know you or anyone in that shit hole of a town."
"I can't believe that you are from the same family as Mrs. Radford."
"Believe it sugar." I spat.
"You are just a little bitch." He said under his breath. "You had better not do anything to your grandmother or you will be sorry."
"I can't believe you are talking about that battle axe like that she is the second Mother Theresa."
"Next to you she would be a saint, and you have no idea as to what you are in for."
"I think I have a clue, it is my family, now leave me alone." I said angrily. He just drove on. The rest of the ride was in silence. He turned on the radio but I was in no mood for music so I turned it off. I could tell that I was royally pissing him off. A smile tugged at the corner of my lips. He just rolled his eyes as we turned down a dirt road that was on my grandmother's property. He parked in front of the large farmhouse and a petite woman came out of the house. It was my grandmother. I got my stuff out of the trunk and headed up to the house. Shane just stood by the car watching.
"Shane be a gentleman and carry her things into the house." The woman scolded.
"Mrs. Radford after the way I was treated on the way here she can carry those bags herself. She packed them she can carry them."
"Mika were you giving him problems."
"He started it." I said as I climbed the steps of the porch.
"Whatever happened to your pretty blonde hair? Mika you don't need that much make up… you are such a pretty girl." She started nattering at me.
"I have changed." I said with a touch of anger in my voice.
"I can see that and I have heard." She paused. "Thank you Shane for helping me out today. I guess you can go home. We can worry about the other things on the weekend. It appears that I am going to have my hands full."
"Well, Mrs. Radford if you need me or my dad you know where to find us." Shane waved goodbye and drove off down the road.
"Now Mika let's get you settled into your new room." She helped me carry the bags up to the room that she had set up for me. "Shane is going to help you paint the room however you want it. I know that it is sparsely furnished but we are going to pick out some things that you like and make it your own room. This dresser and bed will do for now."
"It's fine. I have a room at my home." I stated flatly.
"This is your new home." She stated. There is an ensuite in this bedroom through the door beside the closet. You have two closets one for linen which is the small one and over here is you walk-in closet."
"Is this the master bedroom?" I asked. The room was huge with a bay window complete with window seat.
"No the master bedroom is quite a bit larger." She smiled. "That room is mine." I think that maybe you should wash up and we will have some dinner." She stated. I reluctantly did as I was told. My grandmother was sitting at the dining room table when I came down the stairs. She said grace before we started to eat. "There are going to be some ground rules. However first and foremost I want you to know that you living here should not be viewed as a punishment. I want you to see it as a fresh start."
"How could I not see this as a punishment? My dad forced me here away from all of my friends." I started but was quickly interrupted.
"Your so-called friends got you into drinking and drugs and god knows what else. I think that you are going to be better off without them." She stated. "Now since the drinking and drugs have been brought up I don't have any liquor in the house so anything that I find here will be automatically confiscated. If it is proven to be yours you will be punished. I have arranged for drug testing roughly once every two weeks so if you are tested positive again you will be punished."
"What are you going to do force me to be alone with that dork Shane for an hour?"
"I don't think Shane would appreciate that much unless he needs some punishment as well." She joked. I smiled slightly.
"I was a little hard on him." I sighed as I finished my dinner.
"I don't know what went on in that car but Shane has never refused a job no matter what was involved until he met you."
"I guess I'll apologize the next time I see him." I said softly. It turned out that my grandmother was not a battleaxe at all, though she was pretty tough. I turned in early, which was a first for me. I used to sneak out all the time when I lived at home to be with my friends. However they were thousands of miles away and I didn't know a soul here.
A few weeks went by and things were starting to settle. Shane and I still fought quite a bit but now it seemed like a sport more than anything. However we had a rather nasty blow out the day before and I found myself apologizing yet again.
Though my grandmother lived on a farm, she rented her land to other farmers in the area, as she was too old to run the land like she did with her grandfather. I looked out me window and saw that Shane was working in the yard with a younger looking blonde boy. I cleaned up and got dressed. When I came downstairs Shane and the new boy were seated at the table with my grandmother.
"I went to wake you up for breakfast but you were in the shower all ready." My grandmother smiled. "Good morning Mika."
"Good morning." I said quietly. I sat across from Shane. He was watching me. "I'm sorry I was a bitch yesterday. I've been through a lot lately." I said softly.
"Mika, watch your language." My grandmother scolded.
"It's forgotten." Shane smiled.
"Whose your friend?" I asked.
"This is Jeff Hardy. I'm best friends with his older brother Matt who will be joining us right about now." A dark haired young man walked in and sat beside me.
"This must be the charming Mika I heard all about." Matt winked at me. I shrugged my shoulders as my grandmother said grace. They all started talking about wrestling with my grandmother. I could believe that they watched that crap. I thought to myself. And it appeared that my grandmother watched it with them. As the conversation grew the boys were all hoping to be wrestlers.
"You guys are way to scrawny to be wrestlers." I chuckled. "You need to be either ripped or fat."
"It's not like that anymore." My grandmother laughed. "Things are changing."
"I'll bet that she is going to dig the Undertaker." Jeff grinned. They talked excitedly trying to convince me to watch the trailer park trash of a show. I reluctantly agreed that I would watch with them. After breakfast I did the dishes and went up to my room. There was a soft knock at the door.
"Come in." I said from the window seat. I turned to look to see who came in. It was Shane.
"Look, Mika. I'm sorry I was a jackass to you yesterday." He said to the floor.
"No worries." I said softly.
"Well I just wanted to make sure that we were cool."
"You were concerned about my grandmother." I stated. "I came across as a complete and total spoiled little princess."
"So friends?"
"As long as my friends in LA don't find out." I joked. He smiled. "Shane, just to let you know that I am not in a good place right now and sometimes that mega bitch is going to pop out of nowhere just shut me down like you did yesterday."
"Your grandmother said that you fell into a bad crowd in LA."
"You can say that I suppose, but I really don't want to talk about it right now."
"That's cool. Did you want to come the fair with us tonight? You can meet some of the people you will be going to school with in the fall."
"I guess that would be alright." I said as I got off the window seat. "What time should I expect you?"
"After supper."
"I should ask my grandmother." I began.
"I already did, she said it was up to you." We said goodbye and I did some reading until late that afternoon. I dressed in my favourite black t-shirt and baggy jeans. I did my make-up and joined my grandmother for dinner. I had just finished putting away the dishes when the doorbell rang. It was Shane with the Hardy brothers and a lean red head that was introduced as Amy.
"Ready?" Shane asked. I nodded and we headed to the fair grounds. Back home if someone dressed the way that I did nobody could care less. I was stared and laughed at.
"Hey Helms!" Some guy yelled and made his way over to where we were standing. "So, where did you find morticia?" He laughed as he looked me over.
"This is Mrs Radford's grand daughter Mika." Shane stated. "Mika this is Drew, captain of the football team and the group behind him is the rest of the team.
Soon the group inundated me with insults. My new "friends" were laughing along with them. I had had enough and stormed off.
"Mika!" I heard someone call after me. I dared not stop I was desperately trying not to cry. I felt like everyone thought that I was a freak. I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Wait." It was Shane.
"Leave me the fuck alone." I spat.
"Mika, it was just goofing around." He said softly.
"All night I have been pointed at, stared at, and laughed at behind my back. Then you and your friends did it to my face, it was a little hard for me to take. Let's face it I'm a freak and I should probably get back to LA."
"And how do you plan on doing that?" He asked
"Hitchhike." I said matter of factly. Matt, Jeff, and Amy caught up. "Came back to gang up on me some more?" I accused.
"We all know why you are here." Matt smirked. "You were caught with a shit load of drugs. Don't even deny it, you were probably fucking some guy so you could get the shit for free."
"Matt!" Shane snapped.
"You were the one who thought that this would be a great way to get her back for the way that she treated you yesterday." Jeff replied.
"I am so out of here." I said as I turned and ran out of the fair grounds. I was walking in the direction of my grandmother's house when a car pulled up beside me. It was Drew. Captain of the football team.
"You know I could help you out." He smiled.
"Thanks but no thanks." I said as I kept walking.
"I have
some good shit that we could smoke together. We could have a lot of fun you and
I."
"After all the things that you
said to me you really think that I am going to get in your car with you?"
"I'm trying to be nice to you." He winked. "If I'm nice to you I thought that maybe you would be nice to me." He got out of the car. "You know I didn't mean what I said there, you are one hot chick." He licked his lips seductively. "I think we could make each other feel really good." He grabbed my wrist. Another car pulled up as I started laying the beats to Mr Football player. I was pulled off of him and held to the ground. "Helms let that little bitch go so I can give her what she deserves."
"Leave her alone Drew." I heard Shane say from behind me. "Get the hell out of here right now."
"She's got to be taught a lesson."
"Drew… get the fuck out of here or there will be an anonymous tip sent to the office about you and your little bad habit."
"Helms you are making a big mistake." Drew said as he got in his car and sped off into the night.
"Get your fucking hands off of me." I screamed at Shane as he let me go. I started to walk away again.
"Let me drive you home." He said quietly.
"So you can insult me the rest of the way home?" I said as tears slid down my cheeks. "I would have rather gone with Drew." He got in the car and drove along side me. He was alone. "Where are the rest of your friends?"
"They are at the fair still. They can find their own way home." He said.
"I am not getting in your car."
"I am not letting you walk by yourself after the way Drew sped off." He chuckled. "You sure laid the beats to him."
"Well you are next on my list."
"I deserve it."
"Why did you do it Shane? I thought that you wanted to be my friend?"
"I do. When we first discussed the idea I was so mad at you for the way you treated me like shit."
"I apologized."
"I tried to talk them out of it after you did but they all thought you needed to be put in your place, I wanted to stop it but it was too late. I am so sorry, I didn't think it would upset you this much."
"I'm human of course being made fun of would hurt me."
"Come on get in the car you will never make your curfew if you keep walking. The last thing we need to do is get you in trouble with Mrs. Radford. I reluctantly got in and we rode in silence. "We have to make a detour." Shane said as he turned down a dark road that I never realized was there.
"What the hell?" I asked.
"Drew and his buddies are up ahead waiting for us to come along. Hopefully they didn't see us." Shane said as we pulled into a dark corner. He cut the engine and we were engulfed by the darkness. We heard a roar of engines come racing this way. "I think we were spotted." Shane groaned. "Hopefully they won't realize that we are parked here and they will continue down the road." Several cars whipped down the road. "One more to go." Shane said quietly. The last car was doing a good sweep of the area and soon sped up to join the others.
"Well can we get going now?" I asked.
"I just want them past the bend before we go." We sat for another few minutes and Shane started the car and headed the same way we came. We got to my grandmothers house. Matt, Jeff, and Amy looking really pissed off were sitting on the porch. There was a couple standing talking to my grandmother.
"Mika get in the house right now!" My grandmother said angrily. "Now I know why your father packed you up. I think we should make some other arrangements for you."
"Again I get shipped off. And everyone wonders why I am so fucked up! My mother commited suicide and my father immediately remarries. He then decides not to pay any attention to me until he finds pot in my room sends me here so I can be passed of yet again. You know maybe I should get the hell out of here and find some place where someone will like me and want to see me around." I ran in the house and slammed the door.
"Mika!" My grandmother yelled after me.
I sat on the window seat. With the window open I heard everything.
"Mom, Dad what are you doing here?" Shane asked.
"You left your friends stranded at the fair." His dad boomed. "Why would you do such a thing?"
"Everyone was really mean to Mika and it was my fault. I went to apologize when they weren't willing to do so. I think you should all feel really bad right now after what she just said." He sighed. "Mrs. Radford what were you told that would make you want to give up on her like that. She has treated you with respect since the day that she walked in here."
"Your friends gave a different tale of what happened tonight." She said quietly. "Something about Mika getting high with someone she met at the fair and you went with her."
"You guys sent Drew after her didn't you." Shane was seriously pissed.
"I never had anything to do with that. That was Matt's idea." Jeff said quietly.
"I had some help." Matt glanced at Amy.
"You guys don't even know her." Shane gasped. "Mrs Radford she turned Drew down cold and he tried to hurt her. She was kicking the crap out of him when I arrived"
"Shane I know you are a good person but there is past behaviour." Mrs. Radford said quietly. "She is a troubled girl and I don't think that being here is the right choice. She needs to go somewhere else."
"Mrs. Radford, I have complete faith in what my son is saying." Mrs. Helms began. "If what he says is true you are making a difference in that young woman's life. If you push her out now, there may never be another chance to save her again."
"You're right." She sighed. "Sometimes I wonder if it was me who went wrong with my son."
"Mrs. Radford would it be alright if I went to check on Mika?" Shane asked.
"Yes." She replied. "Tell her that I would like to speak with her when she is ready."
"Yes ma'am." Shane came into the house into my room. I hurried away from the window and made it seem like I was packing. I glared at him. "Look you have every right to be angry at me." He said quietly.
"I am not mad at you. I believe we were talking civilly on the way back here." I stated flatly. "However the company you keep is something less than desirable."
"I am just as pissed as you are." He grumbled. "But they were looking out for me."
"So because you left them at the fair to go after me they tried to make it like you were doing bad things with me." I said. "That is not something I would expect my best friend to do."
"Are you really going to leave?" He asked.
"I really
have no where to go." A rougue tear slid down my cheek. "Nobody wants me here."
"I want you here." Shane said
quietly. "Even though I have a funny way of showing it."
"Thanks Shane." I sighed.
"Gregory we are leaving." I heard Shane's mom's voice.
"I'll be home in a little while." Shane called back.
"Gregory?" I giggled.
"She is the only one who calls me by my given name. I prefer to be called Shane." He said sheepishly.
"Gregory isn't so bad. Try having Mika as a name."
"Your name is pretty." He said quietly. "It suits you."
"Do you
really think that I am pretty?" I gasped. "What the hell kind of crack are you
smoking? Look at me? I am death warmed over! I am hardly pretty."
"You are Mika. One day you
will see that you are pretty for who you are not what you look like." He looked
at his watch. "I know that you heard everything that went on. I saw you in the
window."
"So?"
"Your grandmother loves you. You should give her another chance like the one that she gave you when you first got here. I'll come see you tomorrow." He smiled.
"Are you sure that you want to be seen with a freak like me?"
"I don't have any other friends now so I guess I am stuck." He smiled. I smiled back. "Goodnight Mika."
"Goodnight Gregory." I teased. He stuck his tongue out at me and left. I smiled. He actually thought that I was pretty. I looked in the mirror. Though my eyes were bloodshot from crying I didn't seem as ugly as I thought I was. I freshened up and went downstairs. My grandmother was sitting at the table with milk and cookies.
"Mika I am terribly sorry that I doubted you." She said as she got up and hugged me tightly. "I don't want you to leave, you seem to be flourishing here."
"Grandma, you are the first person in a long time to pay any attention to me. You treat me like a person and I hope that you can start to trust me. I know I was not the best daughter in the world, but I want to be the best that I can be as long as someone believes in me." I said quietly.
"You are starting to sound like the Mika I used to know." She smiled as she hugged me tighter. "Now let's have some cookies and milk." We sat at the table and had the late night snack.
"My dad used to tell me that you ran the house with an iron fist and that was why he was sending me here to live with you. He thought that you would be tougher than boot camp." I said quietly.
"I used to be like that, but once your grandfather passed away I was very much alone. None of my children would call me unless it was to take on their troubled children, to "set them straight" so to speak. It never did any good for any of them. Over the years I began to mellow out and you get the new and improved me." She smiled. "Mika I hated being alone."
"You won't be anymore." I smiled. "I should get some sleep." I yawned. We said goodnight and I went to bed. I got up early the next morning and made breakfast. I had just finished setting the table for two when Shane showed up. "Hey there you." I smield.
"Good morning. Sorry I am so early but I thought that maybe we could go into the city today. Your grandmother wanted you to make your room your own and I thought that we could do that today."
"Sounds like a wonderful idea." My grandmother smiled. "You may as well get your school supplies and school clothes while you are at it." She handed me a bank card and gave me the pin.
"Are you sure you trust me that much?" I asked surprised.
"I wouldn't have done it if I thought otherwise." She smiled. "Shane are you going to have some breakfast with us?"
"Everything is already made." I smiled. "I'm starving and I am not leaving until we have something to eat anyways." Shane agreed as I set another place for him. We finished eating and we headed to the city. We went to the mall first to my begging. I walked into a hair salon and booked an appointment for later that afternoon. We had fun trying on clothes and goofing around. We had lunch and we also bought paint for my room and selected new furniture and bedding. I had thought that I had spent way too much money but Shane told me that my grandmother was really well off and that she had told him to make sure that I was happy with what I had purchased. At 3pm was my appointment. I told Shane to go take in a movie or something as I would be awhile.
Shane was sitting on the bench when I was finished. He looked really tired. I walked over to him. "Are you ready to go home?" I asked.
"Sorry I am waiting for a friend." He said absentmindedly.
"Shane, it's me… I thought that a change in attitude should equate with a change in appearance."
"Mika?" He was stunned. "You look amazing."
"Well, I am not that sad tormented teenager anymore." I smiled.
"Wow." He smiled. "Fuck pretty, you are a knockout."
"Shane you just said a naughty word." I admonished.
"Hey I learnt it from you." He teased. We headed back to the car and headed back to the farm. Shane's parents were sitting on the porch with my grandmother. They were having tea.
"Oh my goodness." My grandmother gasped.
"Gregory, where is Mika?" His mother asked.
"It's me." I smiled as I twirled. "Disapprove?"
"You look fantastic." Mr. Helms smiled.
"I'm sorry that I spent a small fortune today." I said to my grandmother. "It's probably way more than what you intended me to spend but I had Shane egging me on all day."
"Sweet heart. It's alright. I am certain that I am not going to go broke anytime soon." She smiled. "Shane you and your parents are joining us for dinner this evening." She paused. "In fact the two of you should go and get cleaned up as dinner is almost ready." Shane used the main bathroom while I went to use the ensuite in my room after carrying the parcels. The furniture was going to be delivered after the weekend. I joined the group at the table where they were discussing what happened the previous evening.
