I own no Copyright over the characters or the story Copyright belong to BBC Spooks.
With and without Ruth.
She took a deep breath as she saw him approach the bench and lowered himself, he sat so close to her, she found it hard to resist the urge to take his hand in hers and hold it.
She began to speak, "Elena, Sasha. Would I ever have found out about them if they hadn't come back in to your life?" She spoke with anger and hurt in her voice.
He turned to face her and he shook his head, she looked at him and nodded in confirmation.
She turned away from him before she speaks again.
"Do you know what it's like? to feel something for someone and then one day realise you don't even know them."
He looks at her turned away from him, pain in his eyes.
"Ruth. You do know me, you know all the important things." He says with plead in his tone.
She turns to face him, tears threatening to fall.
"You stupid man, people don't love each other on a need to know basis Harry." She turns away from him again.
His heart leaps at the word "love", but then he looks at her turned away from him and he is tinged with sadness and despair.
"Oh Ruth." He says and then he turns his head to the ground.
She tucks a stray piece of hair behind her ear before she speaks again.
"The Home secretary has asked me to join his staff, advising him directly on intelligence and security matters."
He moves his head to look at her.
" And what did you say?" He says his voice straining.
She turns to look at him. "I said I needed to talk to you first, I won't go if you say you can't afford to loose me. Tell me to stay and I will." She says with begging in her voice.
He looks her in her sparkling blue eyes tinged with wetness and trys not to succumb to her pleading.
"I think you should go."
She can't believe what he has said , a tear rolls down her cheek and she doesn't attempt to move away or hide it.
He takes her right hand in his left and holds it. "I can't afford to loose you but towers is right, you could've been so much more and I've been selfish, I should've urged you to move on years ago."
She takes her hand out of Harry's more tears begin to fall as she moves to get up.
"I don't want to loose you Ruth, which is why I don't want you involved in what's to come."
She turns around to face him.
"I don't know what to believe anymore." She says her face wet from all the tears.
"Ruth…" He says but he is interrupted.
"Harry if you really trusted me you wouldn't have lied to me and do you know what's worse? i'm sick of being dependable Ruth of all the lies." She says tears falling faster.
His heart shatters at her breaking down in front of him. He takes her in his arms and tries to calm her, his own emotions about to implode.
"Ohhh Ruth ilya is a dangerous man, and he already knows how important you are to me. He'll use you to get to me, he'll put you in danger and I can't bear to go through it again, I love you."
She looks up at him and takes a deep intake of breath.
"Ohhh Harry, I love you too." She says taking his face in her hands.
He smiles at her tears on his cheeks.
"I'll go Harry I'll go now." She says with reassurance but sadness in her tone.
"Thankyou." He says with reassurance in his voice.
"Harry i have to go and see the Home secretary." She says still looking in to his brown sparkling eyes.
He nods with sadness and takes her face in his hands and their lips meet. The kiss is a tender one but also passionate that of a goodbye.
"See you soon Harry." She says stroking his cheek and then getting up to leave.
He nods and as she walks away leaving him to ponder his life with and without Ruth.
End :)
