Secret Garden

Gardens are a form of autobiography.
Sydney Eddison, Horticulture magazine, August/September 1993

1. Lily or "Beginning"

I am not the best. I am the worst -the worst kind of man that exists, have existed, or/and will exist-. Or maybe I am not the worst either. Who can tell?
I am unique.
For that, thou shalt not speak to what thou dost know not. Obscure, as it might seem. I've walked those paths for long. Too long.
I don't give off any sort of warmth anymore, no comfort. There's no comfort for the fallen, no comfort I can give or receive. I'm sorry. I really am.

Fingers tangled in other fingers. A comforting feeling, salvation for the soul. Momentarilly. It only lasts for a few moments then it shifts, anxiously. It hurts. Does it hurt? Questions, answers. The fingers are still tangled, overlapping one-another. Did he fall asleep for a moment there, weighing down on him, drenched in blissful quiet?

Silence. Do not speak. Do not break the spell. Silence. Quiet. Keep quiet. I don't want to talk. Keep quiet. Stay silent. I don't need words. Words are lies. I don't need to listen. I can hear you. I don't need to listen. Don't speak. I can hear your heartbeat. Don't talk. Don't break the spell. Silence.

Silence.

Fingers still intertwined, hands clasped tight.

He wants to tell him how he feels.

"Do not speak my name" he says. He doesn't mean his name. He means his Name. He does not want to listen. Because it hurts more when he admits it.

- - - - - -

"You really sure of that?" the gentle voice echoed in the clean corridor with the white walls, an odd place to hold a conversation, this was, a hospital, though why either of them was there was an entirely different odd story.

Hazel brown eyes with a glint golden -almost like a cat's or snake's- were set, glistening, on the other's smaller form in front of him. His eyes' feverish glimmer spoke of some sickness creeping bellow the other man's skin, waiting for whatever medication he was taking to fall back and drain away so it could start its work. Thing which also pretty apparent by his pale skin as well as the faint layer of sweat that seemed to cover his forehead and which he tried very much to hide, by wiping it off occasionally with a handkerchief, with only little success though. It wasn't normal to sweat when the weather is this cold anyway. The whole situation, you could easily say, irritated him mildly.
The red-head shrugged as he shook his head. "Pretty sure." he said.

The whole idea was that Lavi, had just asked of him something that was as weird as it was impossible, after having tracked him –or not-so tracked him but this was the way he chose to put it right now- down to that place, which place was but a small secluded village in northern Britain. He sighed at the request and scowled when the other confirmed his intentions.

"Whatever." was the only think he replied, walking his way around the boy and outside of the hospital's front door in order to go to the place in which he was staying. He sighed for a second time within seconds, noticing that the red-haired exorcist was trailing after him. 'Oh, don't bother' he noted to himself, tacking a packet of cigarettes out of his pocket and pulling out a single cigarette and his lighter. Lightly placing the smoke between his lips he kept on walking without actually lighting it up, just leaving it there hanging, as if he was but some grotesque mannequin that was given a cigarette for styling purposes. He shrugged at the bizarre image as he brought the lighter to the thin paper object filled with gentle leaves and drew a breath in as he lit up the old-fashioned silver lighter, making a small flame spring momentarily to life before it died to the bowels of the compact-sized 'dragon' invented by humans.

Returning the lighter in his pocket, along with his cigarettes, he blew off some smoke that was rising to his face and kept walking ahead, feeling awkward to be watched by the other. It almost felt like he was being stalked.

Coming to a halt he turned around and shot a poisonous look the other's way.
"Go home, Eye-patch." he sighed and turning around to go his way again left Lavi behind, who persistently kept following him.

"Hey, old man, ya wait there for a second!" Lavi exasperated running at top speed towards the other. "What's the big idea? It's not as if I'm going to be a burden, right?" he grinned like a lunatic.

Tyki Mikk sighed, giving up on getting away from the other as easy as he had expected to. The reason Lavi, the Bookman's apprentice, claimed to be there was in order to study that huge library on the place Tyki had somehow found himself renting. The red-head had even showed him a letter of recommendation from the Bookman himself that asked kindly to let Lavi stay by him during the winter in order to do that very thing –study-. Not that Tyki minded particularly much, in fact he didn't even own the library to refuse its study. What he minded was Lavi staying close to him. The two of them didn't have a very pleasant past after all. What with him and his repeated attempts to kill Lavi's best friend, Allen Walker, and everything? Nah... it just didn't... couldn't work at all.

"Whatever." the repetitive answer came out without any difficulty. Whatever he thought it was better if he replied like this. It didn't quite matter either way. The boy's stay and his stay were quite unrelated. It was doubtful that they'd even talk to one another at all.

The road to the old home Tyki was renting was a barren one. There were only fields of grains spreading as far as the eye could see with the occasional olive tree sprouting here and there. The ground was sandy and so the two pairs of footsteps kicked up a lot of dust as they walked, creating small dust clouds that were quickly swept away by the wind. Lavi tried to kick up a conversation a couple or more times after Tyki had stopped complaining or talking at all. The older man seemed to be very out of it so Lavi thought it wise to stop after the first five times that he didn't receive an answer at all, if nothing for his own safety, he really didn't want to piss the Noah off. He did not intend to.

When the two finally arrived at the home -which was pretty much further than it looked to be at first,- it was already what the English people called tea-time, five o' clock post meridiem in other words. Tyki sighed. Since he had no intention of hurting the other for now... would it be proper to serve tea...? Or would it be too weird? Why was he even pondering over it...? He didn't like tea...
Combing his lucid black hair with one hand, he sighed looking backwards at Lavi. The red-haired teenager seemed to mind his own business for now so as far as Tyki was concerned it was okay.

"The bedrooms are upstairs." he took a brief moment to notify the other of that. "Pick whichever one you like." those words seemed, sounded empty though. There was nothing more to them but sheer cold realism.He sighed again, realizing he needed be going. There was the issue of the garden. He needed to get going with everything in there, he didn't want to neglect his 'duties'. After all he'd leave soon, he couldn't leave the garden like that.

"The library is on the top floor as well." he added. "I must take my leave. There is business I have to attend to." That being said he covered the distance between the place he was standing and the double doors standing at the end of the hall. Pushing them slightly open, Tyki disappeared inside the small opening and then the door closed back gently, making but a small clicking sound when it came back to its original place.
Lavi would have sworn for a moment that he heard the faint chirping of birds in the other side and that a refreshing breeze had invaded the hall the moment the older man had pushed open the old doors of oak wood.

Being left in his privacy for now, Lavi decided to grab onto the small piece of information that Tyki had provided him with and go upstairs making use of the grand staircase spreading out from the upper floor to the lower like the scaled back of some bizarre beast. A dragon maybe?

The top floor was extremely quiet. Did the other man really live in this place all by himself? From what it would seem, from what his research had turned up after all, the other was there for a good three months already. Didn't he get lonely? Then again Lavi wasn't one to talk about that...

Anyway, he somehow made his way to his room after stopping to dilly-dally a few times, checking out the other rooms –until he picked his own- and the embellished Victorian designs on the furniture in them, rather impressed by the feeling the place gave off -almost as if he had entered another time, leaving the present for the past-. The room he picked out was one by the end of the hallway. He noticed he hadn't come across Tyki's room or the library yet. Those had to be at the other side of the floor he guessed. He'd go 'exploring' after he had set his things down.

He had chosen this room because it had a nice view of the fields and road outside of the house. While he picked his things out of his backpack to place them in the room he couldn't but notice how quiet everything was again. The silence was only so deafening...! Of course that would be because they were pretty far away from any living community -which was a little creepy if you'd think about it. Leaving most of his things back, lying on his bed, he just picked up a pen and a notebook and left the room to discover the other rooms of the house and probably drop by the library to pick a book or two up.
The hallway seemed just as quiet as before though Lavi would have sworn he did more than an hour to emerge from his room. That would probably mean Tyki was still to that place where he had previously exited to. He paid that no second mind and walked back down the hallway, the way he came when he first came to the second story in order to get to the other side of the floor to find the rest of the rooms and the library. Even his footsteps made no sound, as the sound was all absorbed and drained by the carpet spread out along the hall. He got back to were he started, the staircase. Going around it, around the balcony-like corridor, around the large staircase, from where you could see the great main hall bellow. There was no one there, which confirmed his thinking of Tyki Mikk still being outside.

Opening the one door after the other, curious as to the wonders that may lie in waiting, he finally came across Tyki's room at some point. His curiosity taking over he decided to step in there for a small while -but not touch anything, not risking being kicked out now that he was there. Panda was going to kill him if he came back empty-handed. But it was okay. Everything was only so quiet he'd surely hear the other coming and would have time to slip away and head for another room if needed. He didn't really mean to mess with the other's stuff. It was just that the room's window was open and the same refreshing breeze from when Tyki had opened the door before lingered in the room. It was having that smell of spring even if it was wintertime and the cold was biting outside. Closing the door after him he came close to that window and peered outside.

The first thing he saw was a dome of metal and a semi-transparent matter that looked like thick glass. The dome had not been visible from the angle they had approached the home returning from the village and so he was greatly surprised that such a structure was settled all the way back there. Bellow him a garden unfolded its green embroidered carpet like a living rilievo. Some birds were chirping on the branches of beautiful coniferous trees and other, fruit trees, pineapple and apple trees. He could also tell myrtles and a couple barren cherry trees -after all it was winter- and a lone willow next to a small pond. There were also flowers.

There were tulips, inclining their beautiful heads a little towards one another as if to whisper secrets that they didn't want the wind to hear; lavenders rising taller than others, their small purple flowers beautifully contrasting with the green of the grass bellow them; irises, their petals opening like lustful lips, welcoming lips; lilies looking like stars, in colours ranking from white to orange to bright pink.

Lavi noticed Tyki Mikk busy tending to some bright red geraniums at the further corner of his small... forest(?). He doubted it could really be called a 'garden' like that. Who knew that a murderer could also have a side as soft as to be tending to flowers?
Noticing that if the other ever turned the other way he was going to see him for sure, he withdrew and quickly exited the room having touched nothing. He carefully closed the door back to how it was and walked further ahead to find the library -which had been his primary goal anyway. It didn't take him long, after all he had looked in almost every room around. The library was behind one of three closed doors and luckily, he got it with his first try.

When Lavi opened the door he had surely never expected such a quantity of books. Every wall was covered by bookshelves, the books tightly stacked from floor to ceiling. More bookshelves were placed in tidy rows across the room, having shelves at either side to provide even more stocking space for books. Intimidated at first, because he had never expected some isolated home to have this many books he stood there, completely still, watching at the wonderful sight in front of him. In the library's room one could also see one or two small tables and a couple of armchairs lying around.

Lavi sighed looking around. Damn, what was he supposed to be studying again...? Oh, the family Revespiere's connections to some plagues that condemned the nearby villages, right. Panda said he needed the data and that it would be good for him if he took a break from interacting with his 'friends' and went to practice at that village in the library of the home primarily owned by the now vanished Revespiere family, blah blah blah... If he was at the order now he'd probably have something far more interesting to do. Not that books weren't interesting but... but he already missed the company, though the peace and quiet were not bad either.

Starting up he decided to find the most important things first. Information about the family itself. Using a ladder to navigate around the top shelves he started to look around for anything that could be directly linked to the Revespieres. He found some journals by some Lewis Revespiere and a record of the family tree. That was a good start. Once he had the tree memorized it would be easier to place facts that he would read of on other books and documents.

He smiled sheepishly and nodded his head, climbing down the ladder and setting the books on the floor. Instead of sitting to one of the armchairs, he, himself chose to prefer to lie on the warm blue carpet spread on the floor and lose himself in his reading. Becoming absorbed in the family history, detailed enough as described on the family tree, he didn't feel the time passing quickly. He was so absorbed that he didn't hear the quiet footsteps down the hallway a few hours ago or the water running a good time after. He snapped out of it when he heard a small knock on the door. Getting up, his feet numb from being in the same position for too long, Lavi stumbled over to the door and opened it. There was no one there, instead a silver tray with food was laying on the floor. He picked it up and smelled it. Did Tyki bring him food? It wasn't poisoned was it? He smelled it, but it smelled just fine, just like stew and baked potatoes and tomato salad and bread should. Glancing over at the antique of a clock he realized it was way past dinnertime too. Did the other see he was taking long and brought him food? But why would he do that? Care if he was alive or dead? He shrugged and picking the tray up he pushed the door to close making use of his foot, since both his hands were occupied.

Sitting on the floor he picked at his food with the fork that was previously lying next to the plate. Shoving a piece of meat in his mouth he shrugged. It tasted quite nice too, the meat having a slight scent of pepper and paprika. Not giving it a second thought he wolfed the rest down and moved back to reading. With his stomach full though he found it hard to concentrate and he found him getting all the sleepier as the time went by. The letters of the book were dancing in front of his eyes now and so he sighed and dropped his head back. His shoulders felt stiff now, he reminded himself to change positions more often in the future. Walking back to his room he noticed there was complete silence. The silence of the morning paled in front of what he was experiencing now. The dark seemed to close on to him -which made him walk faster, his shadow growing ominously behind him as he came closer to the night lights illuminating the central staircase, the silence threatening to crush him. It sent a shiver down his spine. Whatever was the Bookman thinking sending him down here must have been more of a punishment rather than polishing his skills at subtracting and tracing information. He shivered. He was there, all by himself with a dangerous killer who could lurk in any of those shadowy corners, waiting for a chance to kill him.

Despite his grim thoughts he made it back to his room without anything suspicious happening to him.

The room was a bit messy, exactly the way he left it when he went 'exploring' the old home. He sighed. He wanted to call home. But at such an hour everyone would asleep. Crap… Maybe he'd call Allen and Lenalee in the morning. It would be okay, right?

Pushing his things in the far corner of the bed's mattress he flopped in the bed's warmth and was almost immediately consumed in Morpheus' blanketing dreams. He just wished that Phobetor would forget to visit him. And he was right. After all the god that brought nightmares with him had another person to visit tonight.

A person so close, but in the same time so very far away.