Chapter 1: A Vampire and his Barista


Halloween. You love it and hate it.

Usually you just hate it, because stupid teenagers make the night a living hell for you. But tonight, you have a good reason to love it. This Halloween is different than the rest.

This Halloween, Jake English is wearing a witch hat.

You are Dirk Strider. You're a vampire with an affection for a certain coffee shop barista that probably borders on obsession.

No, wait. It's definitely obsession.

Despite your work fighting demons and kicking their asses back to Derse where they belong, you take time every evening to frequent the local coffee store down the street. Namely to admire the eye-candy behind the counter in the form of one highly attractive Jake English.

You walk into the shop and stand in line behind a group of teenage girls dressed as slutty nurses and devils. Despite the cold and stony exterior everyone says you have, you feel a small smile come to your face as you watch the barista hard at work behind the counter.

It's Jake. Your favorite adorable barista.

You watch Jake smile charmingly at the girls while he hands them their sugary drinks. It could be your imagination, but you think his smile widens when he sees you in line.

"Strider!" He says with that adorable smile on his face. In his excitement to wave to you, the witch hat he's wearing tips slightly over his eyes, and he laughs, pushing it back. "I was wondering when you'd show! Happy Halloween, eh?"

Jake is so adorable in that hat that it's unfair. You want to tell him that, but he's not quite your boyfriend yet, as much as you want him to be. "Right on time. Happy Halloween, English. Nice hat." With a small smirk you flip the wide brim of the witch hat playfully, noticing that it actually looks pretty worn. You wonder if he wears this hat every Halloween.

Jake laughs and swats your hand away. "Shall I get your regular or were you looking to be a bit more festive today?"

"How about a Jake special?" You suggest. "Be daring. Be bold."

"Right-o! One daring and bold drink coming up!" He says, practically skipping off to begin making your drink. Fuck is he cute.

You notice that there isn't really much of a line behind you, so you're clear to take up Jake's time as much as you want. "How's the night been? Any interesting costumes?"

Jake looks like he's mixing more than the usual vanilla creamer with your coffee tonight. There's a look of concentration on his face that only adds to his adorableness. As he mixes just the right blend of flavors together, he says, "eh, you know how it is. Mostly half-dressed high school students. There have been a couple of adorable little kids though! I gave a cookie to Iron Man and he promised to buy me a pony in return."

"How generous of him," you remark, leaning against the counter and watching as Jake turns around this way and that to make your drink. You love watching Jake work. You could easily watch him all night, and on occasion, you have stayed with him till the shop closes, chatting the night away.

"What about you?" Jake asks, swirling a bit of whipped cream on top, even though you know you've told him you don't like it much before. "Any plans tonight?"

Despite your demon hunting profession, things have been remarkably quiet lately. Sometimes trouble stirs up around the graveyard on Halloween, usually from teens messing with things they shouldn't. But you doubt that will happen for a few hours, after prime trick or treating time. That leaves you with plenty of time to watch your favorite barista work. "Might check out the graveyard later, but I'm free till then. How about you?"

"Off in about twenty more minutes actually!" Jake exclaims with excitement, handing you your drink and grinning toothily. "I call this the cool guy special. You wanna kill time with me till your graveyard shenanigans?"

"Cool guy, huh?" you ask, smirking and taking the drink. You don't care much for the whipped cream, but you've seen the way Jake stares when you lick it off the top. So you take your time, swooping your tongue along the perfect peak of cream that Jake created. You scoop the cream up and swallow it before placing a lid on the warm pumpkin flavored drink and sipping it. Of course it's delicious. Everything Jake makes is. "I suppose this cool guy could be convinced to hang out a little longer."

Jake watches you carefully the whole time, and you smirk a little inside as you note the way his face heats up while you put on that show. "Splendid!" he stammers quickly, leaning on the counter beside you. As if he's looking for a distraction, he quickly asks, "are you dressing up as anything?"

You love the way Jake watches you. And you love the way he blushes and stammers afterwards, as if he's guilty of doing something wrong. If you didn't know better, you'd think your feelings for each other might be mutual. No, you know they are, but you can't bring yourself to say anything. It wouldn't be fair to involve Jake in your life, considering what you are and what you do for a living.

Jake would always be in danger. From the demons you hunt… and from yourself. You're a demon too, after all, and your past is far from clean.

No, it's much better to keep your attractive barista crush alive for another day of ogling at the coffee shop. When you hear Jake's question, you spread your hands apologetically and reply, "just a cool guy at your service."

Jake laughs a little too loudly in a manner that can only be described as a giggle. It's the most beautiful thing in the whole world, and you'd love to hear more of it. Jake stifles it far too quickly for your liking.

Before you can say anything else, you sense an unpleasant presence approaching. You're scowling inside before Cronus even enters the establishment. When the door chimes, you watch Jake stand up straight to greet his customer, groaning a bit as he says, "Welcome…"

Even though he's harmless, Cronus is a lesser demon and a nuisance. When he enters, you murmur, "here to cause problems again, Ampora?"

Cronus smiles a bit too widely for your liking, and you just know he's going to be a bother. He swaggers to the counter and says, "Strider, fancy meeting you here. You come to stare at sugar-butt too?"

You frown as Cronus smiles even wider at Jake. "I'll have a caramel mocha. EXTRA creamy." He punctuates that last statement with a wink.

Jake doesn't say a word, but he does flush at Cronus's lewd remark. You want to deck the demon right here and now, but you also can't cause a scene.

Not in the coffee shop. Not in front of Jake.

Maybe later.

"Don't gotta be all shy, baby," Cronus says. "If you're gonna turn red, I can think of other things to really make that blush spread."

Don't start a scene. Don't start a scene.

You eye Cronus venomously and say, "Why don't you stop harassing him? Jake's too nice to say anything, but I'm not."

"Wvhy Strider, you got a little schoolgirl crush goin on?" He responds cheekily.

"It's fine Dirk," Jake says. You know it's because he is trying to keep the peace and his job. Stiffly, almost robotically, he hands Cronus his drink with a forced smile. "Here you are Mr. Ampora! Extra Creamy the way you like."

Cronus sips from the drink but unfortunately shows no sign of leaving. "You knowv me so vwell. I think wve should get to knowv each other better. Like wvhat you got goin' on under that apron." He says with a wink.

You feel the fury building deep inside, but you really don't want to cause a problem for Jake. This job is Jake's livelihood, and if there's an incident during his shift, it will reflect poorly on him. Besides, Cronus knows exactly what you are.

If Jake were ever to find out, you would have to stop coming here. The general populace doesn't tend to take kindly to demons in their midst. Jake would probably be scared of you. He might try to alert the local authorities, which would definitely be the worst, because then you wouldn't be able to see Jake anymore.

You wouldn't be able to see Jake anymore.

The thought hits you like a freight train and you instantly feel sick to your stomach. You've only known Jake for a few months now, but the thought of never seeing him again is one you can't entertain.

Of course, all demons have a policy of keeping each other's secrets, but you don't completely trust Cronus. "You got your drink, now you can leave and stop bothering us."

But Cronus doesn't seem like he's in any hurry to leave. His smile widens again as he says, "vwhat a lovesick fool! But I like sweetcake's butt too. No sign on the door saying vwe can't share… I'm sure he tastes better than that coffee. Isn't that right, Jake?"

"Erm…" Jake laughs nervously. "I… I wouldn't know. I've never tasted myself!"

Cronus leans extremely close to Jake, their faces centimeters apart. In a far too seductive voice, he murmurs, "so let me find out, doll face."

You are going to kill him. You can't take it anymore, and you find yourself growling before roughly shoving Cronus away from Jake. Your eyes are full of vindication as Cronus sputters, his drink splashing a little on the floor when he's thrown back. You growl, "get AWAY from him! Nobody wants your disgusting tongue down their throat."

Jake hops over the counter to stand between you two. "Now you listen here! No tomfoolery will be had in my presence!" He places his hand daringly on your chest. This is as close as you've ever been, and even though he's technically being diplomatic right now, some small part of you loves the fact that he's touching you. Jake English is actually touching you.

You're paralyzed, unable to believe how incredibly warm he is.

His love. His caring. His trust in the world that he knows nothing about.

And suddenly you realize it.

You've fallen ridiculously hard for Jake English.

A human.

Jake Fucking Human English.

You're certain that if Dave knew about this, he would adapt Romeo and Juliet to you and Jake, make a shitty webcomic about it, sell millions of dollars worth of merchandise, and have all the little preteens getting their panties in a bundle over your doomed love-life.

And really, who are you kidding? Of course Dave knows about this. He makes it a point to know everything about your life like the little snot he is. He's probably already a few thousand dollars into the profit margin with his shitty t-shirts of you and Jake.

You push the thoughts of your obnoxious brother aside and instead think about Jake. You've fallen for him, and you don't want anything to hurt him in any way. Definitely not a lecherous Ampora.

But, you're unable to do anything but listen as Jake says, "Mr. Ampora, would you like a few napkins? Your next drink can be on me."

Cronus stares between you and Jake for a moment before a mischievous grin stretches across his face. "On you, huh?" After saying that, he has the gall to lean in close and kiss Jake's cheek. "Can I lick it off?"

Finally, you lose it, grabbing Jake away from the other demon and holding your crush closely by the torso. It's risky, because if you're wrong about Jake, he may never talk to you again. But you have to make Cronus stop bothering Jake for good. Turning his head with the palm of your hand so Jake can't see your face, you lower your shades and show Cronus your vivid orange eyes. "Go away, Cronus. He's mine."

Cronus catches your possessive drift immediately, recognizing that look. He knows what you're implying. Whether it's true or not, you're saying Jake is your human. And vampires are very protective and picky about who interacts with their chosen human.

Of course, Jake is not your human. Not yet. He's not even your boyfriend yet, but Cronus doesn't have to know that.

Scoffing, Cronus brushes himself off. "Your kind are no fun, Strider." He frowns but decides not to cause more of a scene. "Later sugar-butt. Maybe I'll see you again if the Chief gets bored with you."

And with that, he finally leaves the store.

About fucking time.

Jake stands in your hold for a moment, listening to the bell chime to signal Cronus's departure. The customers, the couple that are left in the store after that fiasco, finally stop gaping and go back to their own conversation.

Jake looks at you and frowns crossly, "that Cronus, where does he get off acting like he's the queen of France?!"

"I like that you chose Queen," you comment.

Jake rolls his eyes, "it's true. And hush you! You caused a big enough commotion as is!"

"Yeah, I know," you agree somewhat sheepishly. "I can go now. Get on with my graveyard shenanigans."

"No!" Jake exclaims quickly, then flushes a bit and speaks again, a little quieter this time. "I mean, couldn't you stay a bit and perhaps keep me company until my shift is over? It shan't be too much longer, I assure you, old chum!"

How could you possibly say no? With words like "shan't" and "old chum" Jake's going to make you fucking swoon. So you swoon yourself into one of those comfortable seats against the wall. It gives you a perfect view of Jake as he bustles to attend to the line of customers that suddenly stream into the shop. It's a win-win situation, regardless of which direction he's facing. If he's looking your way, you get to see that cute little smile as he greets each customer. If he turns around to blend a drink, you get that cute butt that's just begging to be touched.

Suddenly, your vision grows just a shade darker, and red text appears in front of your face. "You're staring again."

You frown. This is undoubtedly one of the biggest drawbacks of having your ex-lover's ghost trapped in your shades, able to watch everything you see and do.

It's a long story that you're not going to think about right now. Instead, you think back, since your ex-lover's ghost can hear all of your thoughts. "You can stare just as well as I can, Hal."

"Damn straight I can. Oh no. Wait. Let me fucking swoon into this chair since my little princess knees can't handle the thought of barista Jake English blinking in my direction!" Hal sends back to you.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you're jealous," you think back smugly.

"You do know better. I am," Hal admits pointedly.

"At least you're honest."

"I've always been honest with you. And look where it got me," Hal comments snidely.

"Hal, please. Can we not do this right now?" You think back wearily.

"Sure thing, old chum. We've got a whole long lifetime for me to remind you of your faults. Of which you have many. Many many faults."

"Is there a reason you're pestering me?" you ask.

"Jake English. You're obviously in love with him. I may be jealous as fuck but I can see that."

"Yeah so?" you ask, knowing that it's pointless to argue with someone who can read your thoughts.

"So you need to stop beating around the bush and tap that ass."

Suddenly, your vision goes completely dark, and you realize that it's because something's been thrown over your head. Hal's words disappear from your view, and you hear that adorable tell-tale giggling. Lifting the offending item, which happens to be the witch hat Jake was wearing, off your head, you see Jake beaming down at you.

"You dork," you grin, standing and placing the hat back on Jake's head. "I think it suits you better."

"Why thank you!" he says, adjusting the hat on top of his head. "It's been around in my family for ages! Grandma says it's actually magic."

You watch with amusement as Jake reaches forward and attempts to fix your hair where the hat has flattened it. He looks so fucking adorable, catching his lower lip in between his teeth as he focuses on making your hair the perfection you crafted it into earlier. Which is impossible, you might add.

"There we are, good as new!" he says, laughing a little.

"You're letting him touch your perfect hair? Le gasp." Hal's words flood briefly across your vision before disappearing. You choose to ignore him.

"Actual magic?" You ask instead. "Don't tell me you're planning on causing trouble in the graveyard like those teens."

"Gramma would boil me alive if I were to do such a thing! Spirits are not meant to be trifled with, and if they are behaving in such a way there is always a reason!" Jake says, far more adamantly than you expected. "Needless to say, I believe in a lot of things that other people likely think are only pretend. But I've seen too much in my life to think this is all there is to it."

"Well spoken. Give the kid a fucking medal." Hal sends, and you know it's sarcastic.

Again, you ignore him and think about your little crush. You're not sure whether it's good or bad that Jake believes in so many things. You wonder briefly if he believes in vampires too, but you aren't about to ask him something like that. Instead, you smirk and murmur, "Sounds like you've got a lot of thoughts in that head of yours."

You try to take a sip of your coffee but realize that it's empty. Frowning at the cup, you toss it in a nearby trash can. "Empty already? Fuck. The world is a sad and cruel place."

Jake laughs loudly, and it brightens your entire world. "I can always make you another," he offers. "Though you should probably stop soon. Don't wanna be up all night, eh?"

Suddenly, he pauses, and his cheeks redden, as if he's just realizing that he made terrible innuendo. "Erm, that is to say uhh…" he stammers.

You choose to let him off the hook and ignore that prime set-up. Instead, you say, "Have you paid any attention at all to the time I usually come here? And then number of espresso beans you put in my drinks? I'll be fine, English."

You pause, grinning at him playfully, and continue, "now you. I have to wonder what you would be like with this much pure caffeine running through your veins."

You'd say more, but you stop yourself, because just mentioning Jake's blood is reminding you that you need to feed tonight. Ugh. Pesky habits.

"Probably bouncing off the walls!" Jake exclaims, giggling in a way that is sinfully cute. "I actually am very careful with my caffeine intake. Too much makes me very productive and then very sick! But I make such good coffee it's almost a shame I can't partake in it as much as I'd like. My veins just aren't as tough as yours, I'm afraid."

Internally, you wince as he mentions his veins, and hence his blood, again. You feel a sudden pull towards his body, his blood. You want it. You wonder what his tastes like? Surely it's better than all the rest. Coming from someone as attractive as Jake—

"Keep internal monologuing, and Jake is gonna leave your ass here," Hal sends to you, likely tired of hearing your thoughts of attraction towards someone who isn't him. Of course, he hears your thoughts and sends, "much as I love the gushing of your fluttery whimsical emotions—no wait. I don't love them at all. You never used to have this problem before. What the fuck happened to you?"

Deciding to ignore Hal again, you instead focus your attention back to Jake. And the possibility of a relationship with him. And stupid teenagers that will probably be invoking the wrath of evil spirits in the next couple hours. Hal's right. You have to move this along. "I think it'd be cute watching you go on a caffeinated tear. But anyway, you wanted to talk about something?"

Jake's playful expression turns into a more serious one, and his eyes grow wide as he stammers, "yes, it's just—Strider—" Jake trails off suspiciously, running a hand through his messy hair.

Jake's—nervous? Is your little barista boy nervous? Fuck. That means he's probably going to talk about exactly what you were worried he was going to talk about. Which is really stupid to even be thinking about, since you should be listening to Jake, who is still talking to you and—

"Shut your fucking brain up or you're going to miss it!" Hal screams at you in large bold letters.

"I really... like you," Jake says, glancing up at you with a small smile. "I like being around you. Um. I'd like to be around you more. If you'd like to let me?"

The way he looks at you, so full of hope, how could you possibly tell him no?

Before you can speak, he continues, as if he's in a rush to get everything out that he's wanted to say for a while. "I haven't felt anything for anyone in a long time you see, and if you don't feel the same, I'd rather be told now than strung along," he explains, looking slightly dejected just at the thought. His voice quiets as he says, "I'm not sure I could take it."

You feel your non-beating heart pulled by Jake's words. Feelings that nobody else could make you feel. You know it should be way too early to say this, but you almost suspect that you love him. But if you were ever to hurt Jake, you don't know if you could take it.

For a moment, you pause, waiting for Hal to say something. Something snarky. Some retort.

He's silent.

Hal's waiting. Normally, you would try to figure out why, but you don't have the time for that right now. Jake is expecting an answer from you. "Jake," you finally murmur. "I do feel the same way. Everything feels lighter, brighter, when I'm around you. I'd really like to spend more time with you."

You want to tell Jake more, but you can't do it here. Not in a public place like this. There are far too many eyes and ears around for the sensitive sort of thing you want to tell him.

Jake snaps you out of your melancholy by grabbing both your hands. It's like the guy never quite learned about personal space. "You truly mean it?! Can we—tonight perhaps. I know you've got your graveyard shenanigans later, but we could go for a stroll or something. Admire the Halloween decorations."

You're still reeling from the fact that Jake just touched you. Like actually touched your hands together. "Yeah sure. Let's go," you agree, still in somewhat of a stupor. "You bring a jacket? It's a little chilly out tonight."

Jake gives you an elated smile and admits, "No, I wasn't planning on being out tonight, but it'll be fine. Shouldn't be too chilly."

Frowning, you don't hesitate to remove the jacket you were wearing just for the cool guy ironies and drape it over Jake's shoulders. You know that Jake will get cold outside and maybe sick if you're out for a while, whereas nothing will happen to you. "You should take this," you tell him, not giving him time to argue as you walk out the door, holding it open for your cute barista boy.

Jake stares at you in stunned silence for a few seconds, and you wonder what is going through his mind. You hope he isn't going to change it and decide he doesn't want to go with you. You hope you weren't being too forward by throwing your jacket at him.

He takes all of your worries away when he smiles at you in that adorable way with his teeth peeking slightly out from behind his lips. "T-thank you!" he sputters, quickly walking through the door and leading you both outside into the night.

As the door closes behind you, you feel that it's signifying the end of the coffee-shop pining you had for months. You're finally going out into the world with Jake by your side. And no, he's not your boyfriend yet. You're not even close to where you'd like to be in your relationship, but this is the first step into something exciting and new.

You can't wait to see where the night will bring you.


LateNiteSlacker's Notes:

This is a collaborative fic between myself and Sachi-sama! I write Dirk and she writes Jake. We are switching off chapters and points of view to give you the best possible experience!

Hope that you love this story as much as we do!