Questions swirling through my head
I feel myself fading away
When is enough, enough?
When will this end?
Why is this happening to me?
Is there Hope?
Do I have a future?
I keep seeing him in the streets. I whirl around and shout "Dawson!" willing the man with the wavy hair or the bright eyes to come running back to me. But I'm mistaken. Its my mind playing tricks on me. My psychologist friend Trish thinks that I'm projecting my worries about Pacey and my guilt for leaving Dawson into this personification of him. It can't be him.
2,791 mi, that's how far away he is. I looked it up. I was just curious...
I asked Pacey if he had talked to Dawson lately. He said no, distracted, and went back to doing, Whatever it was that he was doing.
We're both so distracted now. All that holds us together is a few strands of foreign memories.
When those break...
We used to do everything together, now we're just two people who are cohabiting the same place. We could be causal acquaintances sharing a room, for the most part...
The other day he had coffee with a friend from the restaurant. He told me about it, of course it wasn't til afterwards that I found out that that friend was a young lady. It doesn't bother me. I feel numb. I do wonder Why though.
Does he feel the same way that I do? Are we both only staying for the other person?
Why do I keep seeing Dawson? Is he haunting me?
I feel so lost.
Ages ago this is something that I would have talked to Dawson about. We would have talked for hours about my subconscious, and the Whys of it, and when we were done we would still be right were we started but somehow that was always ok. I miss that; I miss how we could talk for hours about nothing. Pacey and I have trouble saying three sentences to each other every day. The rest of the time we sit in strained, distracted silence. Thinking about other things, pretending that's its all ok.
I miss how comfortable Dawson and I could be in the silence, just sitting there together.
But I'm stuck here.
I love about Pacey, I just can't help wonder...
Is there more to love than this?
Dawson always thought that true love was something magical and wonderful. Something that you never gave up on. If that's how he felt then, Why did he let me go?
Why do I care?
Do I have this love with Pacey?
If I do then why do I keep seeing Dawson?
Why do I keep wanting to see Dawson?
Why?
You know how the story goes You and Me
We've heard it many times before
Boy meets Girl
Meant to Be
Friends forever
Meant to be
The story goes downhill from here
Downhill from here
Do you know what you mean to me?
Meant to be
Peanut Butter and Jelly
Meant to be
Macaroni and Cheese
Meant to Be
Ketchup and Fries
Friends til we die
You and me
We're Meant to Be
Meant to be
Meant to be
AN: This came out more disjointed then I originally wanted, but I like how it turened out. It is truly a Dawson/Joey story at heart, but take from it what you will. This Joey's point of view, as she tries to firgure things out. The next Chapter will be from Dawson's perspective, then a final chapter from Pacey.
